A/N: This is my very first Death Note-fanfiction and this first part is based on a dream I had some couple of weeks ago.

I do not own Death Note.


I can't make any more mistakes...

I really can't remember what all has lead me to this situation. At this moment, the most successful detective on Earth – N, aka Near - was following me, wanting to eliminate me. I really should not make mistakes anymore. I know he uses the same weapon as me; he has also gotten a Death note from somewhere. And how do I know all of this, well, I have been investigating him. As for the most successful detective on Earth his private life was pretty easily leaked to me. How I did it, that'll stay a secret.

Back to N, I didn't know if he had shingami eyes yet, but if he did, he'd be deadly dangerous to me. As long as my name was safe he'd have no chance of killing me. And yes, due to some investigation I had his real name – it was Nate River. The only problem was I didn't know his face and so I couldn't write his name on my Death note. And even if I could, killing him would only rise everyone's suspects on me now that he was after me. The thing was, he didn't know my name. He'd just been investigating me for some reason.

I held on to the black notebook in my bag. How could I hide it so that no one could prove me being Kira? Needless to say, my parents were pissed of even thinking that their little girl could be Kira. Especially my father. To be honest, sometimes I felt that, as bad as he felt, he was suspicious of me. My mother really didn't seem to understand the whole situation. She didn't believe in anything supernatural so she naturally thought that this was all just some really strange coinsidence. Makes sense – closely all criminals of the world die of heart attacks within a couple of years. Totally believable. But then again, what kind of mass murderer could kill with heart attacks? It's not that easy to cause a heart attack, after all. But for me, it was. I couldn't help but let an evil grin appear in my face.

"Ally, I really don't want to suspect you, but-"

"But I know you do! And why wouldn't you, there's really no one else to suspect than your own daughter!"

My bluff was beginning to be too simple. I couldn't come up with new arguments, so I just repeated the old things over and over. Maybe he'd get it eventually, and let it go. This was stupid – he wasn't even a cop! None that I knew was, actually. I must've left some clue of my identity at some point – there was no other reason anyone would even make me the prime suspect.

"Are you okay dear?" my mom asked me. We were going to a family meeting, and apparently I'd been sitting still for a while already. Blank staring had become my favorite hobby recently. "Yeah", I muttered and stood up.

Soon enough we left to our family meeting. With the Death note in my bag I checked my phone for new criminals – or victims rather. There were plenty of them and I made sure to remember where their names and faces were announced. It was important so that I could "do my thing" later in the evening.

My dad stopped the car and we got out. "I have to use the bathroom", I whispered to my parents and tip toed behind a corner. A few names won't hurt anyone… When I got back to our table, my father looked at me irritated. "Did you really have to go there now?" he asked. "I thought it'd be polite to go before we started to-"

There were three new people in the restaurant. They sat a few tables away from us, and immediately started observing our table. I felt shivers run up and down my spine as I looked at this guy… He was wearing all white, saggy clothes, his hair was also white and he was staring right at me. He looked a couple of years younger than me, but he was so small overall I really couldn't tell how old he was. He was twisting a lock of hair between his fingers.

Ryuk started to laugh behind my back and I looked behind me. "Somebody's in trouble", he simply told me. Damn shinigami…

I froze. I tried to keep my mind and face calm but found it almost impossible. If I panicked now, I'd announce "I'm Kira!" to the whole restaurant. I bit my lip absently. If someone noticed him looking at me, they'd probably think my uneasiness was due to a stranger staring at me. The truth was different, though; Ryuk's laughter had revealed his identity to me;

Near.

Did he know my name? Had he done the deal with his shinigami? At least he seemed to notice me in a way… "I gotta go", I murmured and stood up. I saw Near write something in his Death note (in the middle of a restaurant?! What is he thinking?!" I started to count. 40 seconds until… I gulped.

The most terrible feeling in the world is to wait for your own death. Every second takes you closer to it, and you can't stop the time; you know that the end is near.

37…

38…

39…

Nothing happened. No pressure in chest, no sudden pounding of heart. I had only a few seconds to act, so I quickly moved out of sight and "collapsed". I didn't dare to breathe as I heard Near and his agents approach me. "I knew it would work", Near muttered and I felt a warm hand in front of my face, checking if I breathed or not. "I was hoping she'd be a little bit more of a challenge though". You have no idea, I thought and listened to the three men's fading voices. As soon as I was sure they'd gone I cleaned up my clothes and went back in.

"I'm sorry. I had to get some fresh air…" I muttered sitting down. Instead of starting a conversation with anyone I began daydreaming again.

WHY couldn't Near kill me? He had all the tools to kill me… How did he not succeed?

How on Earth did I survive this?! "It seems that Near isn't that great a detective after all", Ryuk pointed out. What are you talking about shinigami, I thought. Luckily Ryuk answered before I got irritated. "To your luck you have two L:s in your name", he explained. I frowned. "Near left the note with your name in it at his place. Your first name was written 'Alison', with only six characters."

Wow. The only thing I had hated my name for, had now… Saved me? "You don't seem satisfied", Ryuk told. In fact I was, I just couldn't start cheering when everybody else was talking about funeral. I sighed and pulled my mom's sleeve. "Let's go already. I promised to go out with girls tonight!" Mom let out a sigh of relief (such a family-loving person...) and dad agreed with us, too.

A wonderful silence filled our car as dad drove us home. Now it was time to write "Nate River" in my Death note. He should die in a couple of weeks. The way of dying was more difficult; would he die of a heart attack, everybody would suspect me even though Near and his gang thought I was dead… Accident it is, then.

I rushed to my own room as we got home. "Ryuk, we have to talk", I told the shinigami who was sitting on my chair all twisted. "And before you even think of a deal, I tell you to forget about it. I just want to ask you something." "I'm listening, but you know I may not give you the answer", Ryuk grinned. "If I forfeit ownership of this Death note, will the deaths I have written in it still continue?" Ryuk frowned and if there could be any expression in his dead eyes, he'd look confused. "You know that no one's ever tried it. I highly doubt though; they are still on those pages." "Thank you, I guess that's enough", I shrugged and started writing again.

"Oh dear, you must be busy studying?" my mother was suddenly behind me. "Y-yeah", I said quietly and hid my Death note under my arms. For cases like this I had luckily put some pictures on my table so I could easily disguise my Death note as a scrapbook. "What do you have there?" mom was already going to take the notebook from me. "DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF!" I yelled and took a tighter hold of the notebook. A few pictures fell on the floor and mom picked them up, leaving my room. I collapsed on my bed and sighed.

I looked at the pages of my Death note, feeling sad. I was proud of myself for killing so many criminals, and I still wanted to purify the world and create a new one. Yet I couldn't continue like this. Near should be eliminated first. After that I'd be able to continue, perhaps. I should let the world forget about Kira for a while. I should let myself forget about Kira, too. That way everybody would believe that I'm not him.

"Ryuk… Can I ask you for something?"
"What is it, Allison?"
"After half a year has passed since Near's death, I want you to drop this Death note so that I'll pick it up."
"Do you mean…"
"Yes. I forfeit ownership of this Death note."
"That's too bad. I already began to like this game… And you. But we'll meet again, Kira", the shinigami muttered and touched my forehead with a few fingers.

When I woke up, there was news of yet another Kira-murder in the television. "That Kira-guy must be stupid or something. Who can even commit such many murders without getting caught?!" I thought out loud and started to study for my psychology exam. I had relaxed enough today anyway…


A/N: Thank you for reading! To be continued ~