A/N: I don't think anyone knows how much fun it was too write this. Yeah, this is basically based on my bout with insanity. The thing is, it sucks. It sucks to have voices in your head and it sucks to not be able to distinguish reality from fantasy. What is worse is that you are so good at acting normal, that your friends think your fine when you think that you are going crazy. The difference between this character and I, is that I don't take pills. So yeah, I suffer, but this was still fun to make.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter
Assignment #5 of: Care of Magical Creatures Classroom
Task: Write about someone driven to literal insanity. This can be with the Fwooper bird or by other means. Take your pick.
Criticism or any form of advice is highly appreciated!
**MAJOR TRIGGER WARNINGS: YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED**
Drowning in the Voices
The white-haired boy gasped as if he couldn't breathe. He clutched his head, his fingers pulling at his soft hair, the voices whispering louder and louder. "Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up." He cried, tears slowly falling down his face.
This wasn't his first mental breakdown, and it definitely wasn't going to be his last. He gripped the pill bottle in his hand; it was empty…he had run out. His tears fell quietly and his sobs were a silent scream, his mouth opening every now and then, but never emitting a sound. "I should have told her," The boy whispered.
Fear gripped him at the thought of telling his parents that he had run out of his pills, he knew that he needed to remind them so that he can get more, but he thought he could have gotten better.
Rocking back-and-forth, the boy on the floor looked in his mind for an anchor. Hogwarts? His Hufflepuff friends? Wait, what friends…they didn't exist. "No!" He shouted, ignoring the voices that plagued his mind with lies.
"Brother, brother, please help me." He called out softly, his voice piercing the darkness. However, even though he called out for the man, the boy knew that he was never going to come. He had lost his brother in the war, his loving and kind brother.
When Kenneth died, the boy lost his mind, telling his friends and parents about voices that started appearing everywhere. They whispered lies to him, telling him to kill everyone, that he was a lie. Sometimes, the boy had the overwhelming urge to believe them, but he was always able to evade the temptations with the pills.
Those pills became his friend over the last few years of his life at Hogwarts. Every respect that he had with is Hufflepuff peers were lost. It's funny isn't, a voice cackled, that even a Hufflepuff can lose their loyalty.
"I told you to shut up! It's not real! They would never leave me, they are my friends, they love me." He said at the voice, not knowing if he was telling the voice or telling himself.
Do they now? No one loves you. They won't ever love a monster like you. Did you really deserve to be a Hufflepuff? The voice laughed again, every word and every sentence stabbing the boy in the heart. Don't tell me that you don't love it, feeling their pain, their strife. Every time you talk to others, you smile at their distress.
The boy shook his head fervently. He cried more as the voice continued.
Having enough, he screamed and ran at the wall head-on. His body exploded in pain as blood started trickling down his face, but he didn't care, he kept hitting his head on the wall. "Shut up! I'm sick of you talking, I'm sick of all the voices! I'm done with all this noise!"
The voice just laughed at the boy's pain. You can't hide it, definitely not from me. The voice grabbed at the boy's shoulders, I'm you. I'm the part of you that you don't want to show to anyone, right? But doing that has setbacks, all the migraines, you have become weak. I can stop them, you know, I can stop the voices.
The wailing coming from the small boy quieted, the shock and relief setting in his shoulders. "You can?"
Of course, the voice promised. Just let me in, and it will all be over. You are tired of swallowing those pills, I know that. So just let me in, it's as easy as that. Think of all the pain that can go away. Give me it, give me all your pain and suffering, feed me. The voice whispered into the boy's ear.
Thinking for a moment, the boy's resolve broke. He just couldn't do it anymore, everything was just destroying him and he had enough. He was done with the tears and done with the pain.
He didn't want to feel anymore.
Letting out one last cry, the boy let the voice in, and just like he promised, the voices stopped immediately. But something cracked in his body, an invisible force cracked like glass and he didn't know what.
A knock resounded on the door, "Elysian? Are you okay? Who are you talking to?" The door opened, revealing a woman dressed in a business suit.
She stared at her son that was sitting down, his back to her. "Honey?" She called hesitantly. "Ely, are you okay?"
The boy slowly turned, an innocent smile on his face. "I'm fine, mother." He said happily, a knife glinting in his hand.
