Survivor: Moonbounce

Cast List

Darcy and Sarah: Secret Hosts

Fake Host: Emilita

Phill. Funny Smart

Shirley. Pretty Ditz

Gertie. Don't ask.

Carla. Tomboy

Nivek. Near-Mute

Kurt. Shallow.

Insane Guy. No comment.

Disclaimer: We do not own Survivor. Duh. How thick ARE you? However, we do own this particular version of it, what with the ingenious creation of fake hosts and secret hosts and all.

Author's Note: While these Characters are non-fictional, their names have been changed for their own protection.

Scene 1:

Welcome to Survivor, in our newest environment: Moonbounce.

Emilita (a.k.a fake host): First allow me to explain the rules, before you say good bye to solid ground for the next ten weeks, unless you are eliminated.

(The contestants stand nervously againist the pillars of the gargantuan structure that is to be their home. The moonbounce is 25' by 25' and with 10' walls. The attatched ball pit is circular with a diameter of 15' and 6' deep.)

Emilita: Two teammates from each team will be given an hour each day to rummage in the ball pit for the individually wrapped foods that are buried there. You will have teams which will periodically decline, due to the fact that you will have many strange challenges. If you lose, you're done for. We will determine an appropriate demise. These conversations will take place in the ball pit, a soundproof room, filled with plastic balls, some of which may contain secret prizes. There is also a door five feet off the ground. If you have trouble accessing the door to the ball pit, that is your own problem, and you will be marked tardy. I will now assign the team.

"Ooh, Ooh, pick me!" says Shirley.

"NO! I choose the teams!" shrieks Emilita.

"Now, who would like to be team captains?" asks our host in a much calmer voice. But is she really the host? (No she isn't, but our contestants don't know that. The real hosts are Darcy and Sarah, who will be provoking the contestants by posing as their team mates. One more thing you should know: Insane man isn't really a contestant. We borrowed him from an insane asylum to annoy the players. )

All is silent...except for Insane Man, who is picking the lint between his toes, and whistling.

"The teams will be Darcil I mean Darcy, Phill

"That is spelled with two 'L's!" says Phill.

"Silence!" yells the excitable Emilita.

"The rest of that team is Shirley and Carla. The other team is Sarah, Gertie, Kurt, and Nivek. Captains are to be determined by way of future challenges."

"What about Insane Man? " inquires Gertie.

"Uh...my, my, look at the time! I really must go home and feed my beaver, but I will return!"

Suddenly the teams are kidnapped. They are thrown into two separate sacks, and hoisted into a helicopter. Insane Man gets his own sack. As they are flying above the clouds, several comments are heard.

"I often get airsick."

"Ugh."

"Are we having fun yet?"

"When do we get the money?"

"Stop poking me!"

But before anyone can say another word, they are falling through the air, and landing with a gigantic bounce. Three bounces, to be exact. Everyone is frantically awaiting the tour of their new home. Sadly, they are still stuck inside the bags. Suddenly, a booming voice is heard. "First one out of the bag is team captain." And so the hilarity ensues.