Part of Me

Based off Ally Carter's young adult books, the Gallagher Girls series.

~Sixteen~

They met when they were both fifteen. Cammie always knew there was something different about him, but never pressed for details. He was a spy, so of course that was some of the difference, but there was something different about him compared to the other Blackthorne boys that were on the exchange.

She saw it in his eyes, the way they stayed hidden from everything, yet they held something knowing in them. She would catch him looking at her every so often, but when she would look up he would lower his eyes and look away.

She would think about him a lot and everything she knew about him:

His name was Zachary Goode.
He went to Blackthorne and it was a school for spies.
He had dark brown hair and deep eyes.
He wasn't tall, but he wasn't short either, and he was very muscular.
He was smart, and unlike the other boys, he spent his time in the Library studying rather than flirting with every girl he saw.
He was close to Mr. Solomon and she knew that he was mysterious.

That was all; that was everything she knew about him and she wanted to know more. She had started to figure him out, though. She noticed the way he would react to certain things: In Cove Ops she noticed the way Zach would look down at his hands when Mr. Solomon talked about different assassins around the world and what hits they'd executed. She noticed the way his jaw would clench when families were brought up in the group's discussions.

He left before she could figure all of him out, but he didn't leave without kissing her goodbye. She was unaware that they would meet the next year when they were both sixteen, yet when she was alone in the Library one Friday he showed up behind her.

She didn't know why he was back, there wasn't another exchange going on, but there he was in plain day. He wouldn't tell her why he was back, just that her mother knew he was there and told him he could stay for as long as he needed to. She didn't press him for details, she knew it was personal and he would tell her in time.

She trusted him for some strange reason, she didn't know why she trusted him, or how, or what brought her to trust him; all she knew was that he was always there and she knew she could talk to him.

It was a few months later that she caught him in the P&E Barn and mustered up the courage to share her personal life story with him. She had never told anyone about it, but of course everyone knew. If it was up to her, she wouldn't have told everyone. So, in all honesty Zach would be the first one she would tell about her past. She had to get it off her chest, and a part of her wanted Zach to know everything about her.

When she walked into the barn Zach was attacking the punching bag like it was the last thing he would ever do. He was shirtless, sweaty, and so absorbed in beating the crud out of the bag that he almost swung at Cammie out of surprise when she placed her hand on his shoulder.

"Sorry," she said apologetically, lowering her hand so it rested at her side.

"It's okay. I just didn't hear you come in."

"You're getting sloppy," she teased as he grabbed a towel to wipe off his hands.

"Did you come here just to tease me?" he asked, smiling up at her.

"Actually no, I came to see you."

"Oh?" he asked raising his eyebrows.

"I came to talk to you actually, but I can come back later." She started to turn away, but Zach grabbed her arm.

"No it's fine. I was just about done anyways. What's up?"

She looked back at him before biting her lip and looking away. He grabbed her hand and led her to sit on the bench by the wall. He sat down next to her, his leg barely brushing hers, but it was enough for her to feel it.

"What's on your mind Gallagher Girl?" he asked after a couple of seconds.

She remained silent for a while longer, her eyebrows scrunched together like she was in deep thought. After another minute she looked up at Zach before starting.

"You know how when something major happens and everybody finds out?" He just nodded his head, allowing her to continue. "And how there are times when if it were up to you, you wouldn't tell anybody?" He nodded again, a bit confused to where this was going.

"What I'm trying to say," she said before taking a deep breath and continuing, "is that everyone here knows what happened to me in my past, or more specifically, what happened to my family."

His eyes widened for a fraction of a second before returning to their normal size. He placed his hands over hers when he understood what she was trying to get at.

"Cammie, if it's too personal you don't have to tell me. I understand."

"No," she said, shaking her head, "I want to do this. I haven't told anyone this - they already know. Besides I want you to be the one I tell."

"Okay," he nodded his head before allowing her to continue.

"When I was ten my dad went on a CIA mission to track down and infiltrate a terrorist organization. He was supposed to call in every other day to check up with them and give them information. He was supposed to have gone with a partner, Mr. Solomon, but Joe couldn't go because he was put on desk duty or something.

Anyways, about three weeks in, my dad missed two call-ins and they knew something had gone wrong. They called my mom to tell her that he hadn't called-in; but that they were hoping he would in the next few days. A month later they pronounced him officially MIA."

As Cammie told Zach her story he just sat there looking at her with a sad and pained expression on his face. He never said a word, but he didn't have to because he said everything he needed to with his eyes. After a moment of looking at Zach she continued.

"Everyone here knows that I'm Matthew Andrew Morgan's daughter, everyone knows that he's MIA, and I know it's not a secret because everyone knows, but it's still my secret because I haven't told anyone until today."

"Cammie, why did you tell me? Why me?" She smiled at him.

"Because you're the one I wanted to tell. I trust you with my life." The look in his eyes when she told him she trusted him with her life was proof enough to know that no one had ever told him that before. As if no one had trusted him enough to.

He pressed his forehead against hers and let out a breath, his thumb stroked her cheek and he smiled. The next moment his lips were on hers and nothing else mattered. When he pulled away after a minute he looked at her, truly looked at her, and whispered,

"And I trust you with mine."

A small, sad smile came across her face that he seemed to notice because he tilted his head to the side and his brows furrowed. It was a silent question, but she understood it perfectly.

"The one part that nobody knows is that I knew. I knew there was a higher chance that he wasn't coming home. I knew he wasn't. A part of me hoped I was wrong. I hoped that I would see my dad again, and he would be alive. But more often than not, I had the thought of, 'I know he's dead. He's never coming home.' Is it bad of me that I thought that? That I thought there was no hope of him being alive?" Zach stayed silent but shook his head when she finished. Finally he spoke.

"I understand what you were thinking. If you were to ask Liz she would do some statistics with the number of spies pronounced MIA, only a small percentage of them are found alive. Bex would understand more because her parents are spies, and she knows that hope is a very fragile thing that can break and shatter at any given time. But," he continued. "If you ask me, I would say that I get it. A small part of you will always hope, always dream, but there's that other part of you that knows the truth. Even if you don't want to believe it, more often than not you know the truth. Your body shuts that part off and just focuses on the hope, but you know more than others do, you've seen more than others have, and you have a better touch on reality than most people. Joe once told me that he knew there was a slim chance of your father being alive because he knew that death was the only thing that could keep him from you. He'll still hope, though, a part of him will until your father's body is found; he'll hope."

Before she could stop herself she had wrapped her arms around him and buried her head in his neck. He wrapped his arms around her and just held her for what seemed like hours. The future may be unknown to them, but for her that moment was all that mattered because she had given Zach a part of herself that she hadn't given to anyone else and that meant the world to her.

~Eighteen~

Zach had never told her why he had come back to Gallagher, but it didn't seem as if she minded. He'd known her for almost three years now and kissed her a lot, so he thought it was probably time he came clean with everything. She knew some things, she knew that his mother was a Psychotic killer; she knew what happened to her father, finally, but even with knowing all that; she didn't know him, his story. Not really.

He'd sent a cryptic note telling her to meet him at the edge of the lake at midnight, and he had to say he was a little surprised that she showed up because he thought he sounded like a creeper telling her to meet him alone, at midnight, by the lake. Another part of him, though, was relieved because it meant she trusted him not to choke her and drown her in the middle of the night. He'd never had thoughts like that; he'd had thoughts, just not of drowning her, which he would never do. Still, the thought scared him and he knew more than ever that telling her about himself was the right decision.

"Zach," just the name brought him back and he realized that Cammie was standing a foot away smiling at him. They were on the North side of the lake that met up with the woods.

"Hey, can I talk to you?" he cursed himself for the waver in his voice, and hoped it wasn't so bad, but seeing the concern on her face his hope was futile.

"Of course, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." He back tracked, "Nothing new anyways. I wanted to tell you something. Well many things actually." He'd realized he was rambling and was glad that Cammie's gentle hands had stopped his own from fidgeting. Her smile was soft. He didn't know how she could have such an air of innocence around her considering she'd been tortured just that summer.

"Zach, you can tell me anything you want to. It's fine." He nodded and gestured over to two rocks that were at the edge of the forest. She went and sat on one of them; he came and joined her on the other. He took a deep breath before he began.

"Two years ago you told me about your past, your family. I didn't want to tell you about my past because I didn't want to hurt you, but the more I think about it you would be hurt more if you found out from someone other than me. Starting from the beginning I want to tell you everything." He hesitated, seeing if she was going to interject, tell him she didn't want to know, but she stayed silent. The only change was her small, soft hand that now rested over his on his leg. That was all he needed to continue.

"I went to Blackthorne in the seventh grade; Catherine shipped me away. She didn't want me around because I wasn't the perfect son and she didn't want me to jeopardize her business. That's when I met Joe. Since I had never met my real father he became like a father to me in more ways than one. I could go to him for anything and I knew that he would never let anything happen to me. Blackthorne isn't what you think it is, Cammie." He called her Cammie, not Gallagher Girl, because this was serious.

"Blackthorne is called the Blackthorne Institute for Troubled Young Men. There's a reason for that." Before he continued he pulled something out of his jacket pocket. It looked like folded paper and he handed it to her. "This is from when I was in the seventh grade. There's one for every year. I kept them as a reminder."

Cammie opened them up one after another to see that they were targets; the ones with a man in the center. On each target there was a year and date, a name, and a distance. In the seventh grade the shots were scattered around the lower half of the page, and each year they got closer together and moved up to the chest. The last year that had a target sheet was sophomore year; the only difference was that there were two sheets for that year. One was like the other sheets she'd looked at, but the other one had thick black words written across the top of the page that read:

Targets shot from moving positions in changing light, and from different distances and directions.

After she looked through all the papers she folded them back without saying a word. It was only when she handed them back to Zach did she speak.

"The ultimate goal, it shows accuracy and precision, as well as the ability to access which targets to shoot. It shows the ultimate fighter." Zach just nodded, not meeting her gaze as he put the papers back into his jacket.

"The ultimate assassin," he spoke quietly, ashamed to say those words.

He didn't want Cammie to be afraid of him, but he was almost certain that she would be after hearing those words. He was an assassin, he was raised to be a killer, and he was a monster. He knew it, and he was pretty sure she was thinking the same thing at this very moment. He expected her to stand up, walk away and never talk to him again, so he was surprised when he felt her small hand on his cheek as she kneeled down in front of him.

"I wouldn't care if you were an assassin, or a spy, or half human. I know that you would never hurt me and I know that you're a good person. You do good things for people. No matter what you are, you're good. If you weren't good, then you wouldn't care what you were and what you did. You have a conscience, you have a heart, and that's all I need to know that you're good. I don't care that you were trained as an assassin, I don't care who your mother is, I care who you are, and you're amazing. I love you."

He bowed his head down, her thumb rubbing small circles against his skin. It took him a moment to lift his head back up and look into her eyes, and when he did he was met with her lips pressed softly against his.

"I am so in love with you." There was just a small break of the kiss before he was kissing her again, his hand resting against her lower back, drawing her in. He wanted to stay out there with her forever, but he knew that she had to go back inside before her roommates panicked. As she walked away she turned back around and smiled at him.

"You may not like it, Zach, but it's a part of who you are. It's what makes you, you. And after everything, you're pretty amazing."

~Twenty-One~

Cammie was debating what to get for Zach. It couldn't be just anything, this was special, he was special, and it wasn't just any birthday; it was his twenty-first birthday. She could get him an engraved knife, but he already had plenty of knives; besides, she'd already gotten him an engraved gun for his twentieth birthday. That's when the thought came to her. There was something she could give him that would be better than any other gift. It was both meaningful to her, and it would be to him, and it was a style that he would wear. She knew with all her heart that it was the perfect gift and the right decision.

When Cammie walked into the living room of their apartment Zach was lounging on the couch watching a crime show. She walked over to the couch and sat down next to him; at the same time Zach hit pause on the TV and looked over at her.

"What's this?" he asked as he eyed the small wrapped gift in her hands.

"Happy Birthday Zach, I love you." She planted a kiss to his cheek and handed him the present.

He smiled at her before he turned to the package in front of him and gently opened it. When he pulled back the wrapping paper he saw a fancy watch. He picked it up and turned it over in his hand, noticing that there was an old engraving on it.

To my dearest love; with all my heart.

It wasn't addressed to anyone specifically, but on the edge there were four sets of initials: RC, MAM, CAM, and ZG.

Zach looked back up to Cammie who had been looking at him the whole time.

"What is it?"

"A watch." She smiled.

"Well I know that, but what's the story?"

"How do you know that there's a story?"

"Cam, you always have a story, and the watch is engraved. What's the watch's story?" He was looking at her, really looking at her like he was looking into her and she loved that.

"First it was my Grand-father's; he gave it to my Grandma after they got married. When my mom and dad were dating my Grandma gave it to my mom and told her that she knew they would be together forever and that she was now a part of the family. Six months later my mom and dad got engaged and on their wedding day my mom gave that watch to my dad with the engraving, "To my dearest love; with all my heart." When I turned eight my father gave it to me and said that I would always be his little girl, and one day when the time was right I would give it to the man who held my heart in his palm. And now it's yours." He just looked at her for the longest time and then,

"When did you know?"

"That I loved you? I think I always had that love for you deep down, but when I really knew it with all my heart was when you showed up in Rome just to make sure I was safe. Before you showed up all I could think about was you, you there with me in Rome, and then I just knew."

She'd barely gotten the last word out before his lips were pressed against hers. It was gentle, sweet, caring, and above all it was passionate and loving. The feel of his hands in her hair made her heart race, and with her hands pressed against his chest she could feel his heart racing, too.

"Happy Birthday, Blackthorne Boy." She smiled; he smiled back.

"It is one of the best birthdays I've ever had. You want to know why?"

"Why?"

"Because not only do I have you in my life, but I have this watch which will always remind me of you even when you're all the way around the world on a mission. This watch was a part of you, and now it will forever be a part of me. I love you so much, Cammie."

"And I love you."

~Twenty-Five~

Zach wasn't nervous, he didn't know if he should be, but all he felt was giddiness. This day would be amazing even if it wasn't perfect. If it rained then great, they both loved the rain, and if anything else happened that could put a damper on his mood and this day, then they'd have something to talk about in the future when they were gathered around with all their friends looking back on the funny moments. Yes, today would be perfectly imperfect, and it would be amazing. He was wearing the watch she gave to him on his twenty-first birthday and he was ready.

He didn't know what he was going to say; he wanted it to be a surprise for him and for her. He thought it was better to come from the heart than some pre-written speech. So, when he was standing in a beautiful flower filled garden at the alter he wasn't shaking, and when she came down the aisle in her beautiful wedding dress his eyes lit up with his smile.

She was beautiful, she always was, but in that moment she looked like an angel, and he couldn't believe that she was his, and he would be hers. She made it onto the platform he was on and Joe, (who had escorted her down the aisle), kissed her cheek before going to his seat. The pastor began once she turned to face him; when it came to the vows, Zach was ready.

"The first day I met you in that elevator I knew you would be hard to get to know, and when you threatened to scream and call that police man over just to get me to leave you alone I knew that I wanted more of that fire aimed at me. I didn't like you in the beginning, I didn't know you, but I respected you. It was later that I knew that I actually liked you, and it took me a little bit to admit it because I almost didn't want to like you. Relationships are complicated to begin with, but then add two spies to the mix and it's even more complicated. But I did like you, I liked you a lot, and I knew that some things were worth being complicated. You accepted me for who I was, what I was, when I couldn't even really accept it myself. You saw the good in me and you trusted me. Not that you shouldn't trust me, but that meant everything to me. You're amazing; stubborn at times, but I love that about you because you make sure the right thing is done.

"You're the most amazing woman I've ever met and your kisses are the most amazing thing I've ever experienced, and I love you for that. You, Cameron Ann Morgan, are an amazing kisser. I just want to say that after everything we've been through, we can get through anything, especially if we have each other. And don't you dare forget that two is always better than one. I am so in love with you, and I always will be."

After he finished he let out a breath and waited for what Cammie had to say.

"I have to say, I didn't expect to like you, let alone to fall in love with you, but you know what they say, 'meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.' I didn't like you when I first met you either; in fact I kind of loathed you, a lot. So much so that I wanted to push you down the stairs. Now I'm so glad that I didn't because I would have missed out on the amazing guy that you are; the amazing man that you are. When I met you we were only sophomores, but you were never a boy in my mind. It might have been because you were so muscular, but mostly because you've been through so much and you had to grow up way before you were supposed to. Yes you can be infuriating at times, but when I see you it makes it all okay because you're my infuriating. Oh, and the other thing is that you look incredibly sexy standing here in this tux and all I could think about on the way down the aisle was how incredible you looked. I love you for everything that you are, I love you to the moon and back, and I'll love you for the rest of my life."

They placed the rings on each other's fingers and when the pastor said that he could kiss the bride all he could think was: I've kissed her so many times before, but now I'm kissing her as my wife. He cupped her cheek and brought her head to his and kissed her like there was nothing else in the world. When they pulled back everyone was cheering, but he only saw her.

"You're a great kisser, too, just so you know."

He didn't reply, he just laughed and kissed her again. It was the beginning of a new chapter and they would read the pages together, forever and always.

~Thirty-Five~

Cammie thought it was the perfect summer day; it was hot, but not too hot, and there was a light breeze that swayed through the trees. There was laughter and shrieks that filled the air, and it made her smile. She and Zach had been married for ten years, and each year had been a new adventure and a new excitement. Three years into their marriage they had the twins, Matthew Michael Goode and Morgan Michelle Goode. Matthew had his father's eyes, deep and caring, and he had his mother's hair, dirty blond and wild. Morgan had her mother's eyes on the other hand; big brown eyes that held warmth in their depths. Her long brown hair blew in the wind as the two of them chased each other around the yard.

The smell of meat cooking filled the air as Zach opened the barbeque to check on the burgers. Cammie turned to him and smiled, placing a delicate kiss to his jaw line. Turning to her, he wrapped his arms around her waist and brought her closer to him.

"What was that for?" he asked against her temple.

"What was what for?" The innocence rang in her voice, but the smile on her face gave it away.

"Oh don't act so innocent Mrs. Goode; you can never hide from me." He kissed her neck as she laughed.

"I know you'll always find me."

"You might have been good at hide and seek, but you'll always lose against me." She shook her head before placing her lips over his. It was sweet and simple, but filled with love like no other.

"I know," she whispered, "I know, and that's why I love you."

They were both silent for a minute, until Cammie spoke.

"Zach, you know I'll always love you, and you know that I would do anything in the world to protect you and our kids. Just always remember that no matter what happens you'll always have a part of me in our kids. If anything is to happen to me just know that I'll always be with you in your heart and in our kids. I love you more than words can say."

"And I love you, but Cammie nothing is ever going to happen to you. We'll both grow old together and our kids will grow up and we'll live life to the fullest. Everything will work out the way it's supposed to. No matter what we go through, or what happens, we'll go through it together; we'll see what happens together. We're not normal, we'll never be normal, but when I'm with you that's my normal, in a totally non normal way. Forever and always."

"Forever and always." She leaned into him and he put his hand on her stomach. The protrusion wasn't big, but there was a small bump that was starting to form. She kissed him; deeply, and with everything she had. Morgan yelled something in the background that had to do with tag. She pulled back and looked at Zach who had that look on his face.

"Go," she laughed, "I'll watch over the food." He smiled, kissed her cheek, and whispered a small thank you to her before racing off to go play with their kids.

She smiled at the three of them, running around the lawn playing tag with a twist of spy mixed in with it. To think that this started when they were sixteen and she opened up to him. She gave a part of herself to him and in return he gave a part of himself to her, and in the end it worked out pretty well; although, the end is only the beginning of a new book, and there would be many more books in their future.

Author's Note: Well, I hoped you guys liked it. I thought of this idea a few months ago and really wanted to write it. I actually started writing it about two months ago and finally was able to finish it. Once again, I hope you enjoyed it.

-GymGirl904.