(Do the) Hustle (and Flow)
Subtitled as: The Residual Feeling of Warmth
"Time for some thrilling heroics." – Jayne
"It's worse than you know." – Operative
"It usually is." – Mal
Disclaimer, Acknowledgments, Dedication, and Soundtrack
"Kaylee, what the hell's going on in the engine room? Were there monkeys? Some terrifying space monkeys maybe got loose?" – Mal
Disclaimer
I don't own the lovely and beautiful characters of the "Firefly" (and now "Serenity") verse. A wonderful man named Joss does. (We all know and love Joss. Yay Joss! You're the man!) So please don't sue. I work in a cafeteria. You don't want my wages. Any characters you don't recognize (namely Miles Cromwell, Falstaff Rizzly, Abeni Hedge, Emilia Sage, Carole Trickey, and their respective posse parcels) belong to me. You may borrow them, but only if you ask really nicely.
This story is set after the Big Damn Movie, with one caveat: Wash didn't die. I like Wash and he doesn't deserve to be dead in my story. So, he's not! Yay! (Shepherd Book? He's still dead.)
Acknowledgments
I would like to first thank Holly M for taking me to see "Serenity" in the first place and thereby starting my love affair with the "Firefly" verse, even if we did get lost. I politely decline from thanking the complicated bus system that took me to see "Serenity" the second time, mostly because I missed my connecting bus home.
Thank you to Brian for agreeing to let me write a character for him and being the best preview reader ever. Thank you to Val for coming up with her own character and throwing herself wholeheartedly into this. Thank you to Vikki for coming up with her own character and letting me play around with it. Thank you to Casey, the shiniest gal in the verse, for putting herself right where anybody sensible would be ("With the whores!") and making up a great new character.
All the nursery/nonsense rhymes River sings can be found on the Internet, mostly through and their multitude of nursery rhyme sites (which for some reason are overwhelmingly British… not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just interesting). You can find all of them there, except for "Cups and plates and forks and spoons….," which I made up myself.
"In The Highway" is an actual song sung by The Peasall Sisters and can be found on the soundtrack for "O Brother Where Art Thou" starring George Clooney. Lyrics can be found on the Internet, although Kaylee sings all of them.
The title of the story comes from a song ("Do the Hustle") and a movie ("Hustle and Flow"). You can find those on the Internet too.
All Chinese phrases were found on the Internet at http/fireflychinese.home. is a rockin' awesome site), as well as some of the other stories posted on this site.
Idon't claim to have any medical knowledge, but Simon does, so he handles that.
The planets or worlds or towns I make up probably don't exist in the "Firefly" verse. The ones you recognize do, though.
Yes, I know "space ponies" aren't real, and that real ponies don't talk. It was a sad day in Happy Town when that secret was revealed, but that's another story for another time.
Dedication
I dedicate this story to my handsome boy, Brian (known in this story as Miles Cromwell). He is the best boyfriend a girl could ask for, and one heck of a mean trombone player.
I also dedicate this to Duck-Duck-Goose and Dariel's Dove, "Firefly" fans in their own right, both of whom I miss very, very much. Rock on!
Soundtrack
These are the songs I had on repeat for the entire time I worked on this story. You may find them wonderful, or you may hate them. You can find them all on iTunes, where you can also legally download them if you want your very own soundtrack to go along with this story.
General Listening:
Eight Easy Steps – Alanis Morissette
I've Been Everywhere – Johnny Cash
Spice Up Your Life – Spice Girls
Lady Marmalade – from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack
The Sign – Ace of Base
Tom's Diner (7"A) – Suzanne Vega & DNA
Milkshake – Kelis
Alive and Amplified – The Mooney Suzuki
One Two Step – Ciara featuring Missy Elliot
Without Me – Eminem
Intuition – Jewel
Catch My Disease – Ben Lee
The World is Black – Good Charlotte
Gotta Get Thru This – Daniel Bedingfield
Gold Digger – Kanye West featuring Jamie Foxx
Invisible Touch – Genesis
Imagine – A Perfect Circle
Come on Eileen – Dexy's Midnight Runners
Semi-Charmed Life – Third Eye Blind
Take It Off – The Donnas
Good is Good – Sheryl Crow
During periods of writer's block, these were all on repeat until their lyrics were seared into my brain:
Stars – Switchfoot
Never Let You Go – Third Eye Blind
All For You – Sister Hazel
Anyway, enjoy (Do the) Hustle (and Flow)! I hope you like reading it as much as I loved writing it! Don't forget to review!
