Disclaimer: I don't own Homestuck or any of the characters used here! ~
AN: Okay guys, so this is my first Homestuck oneshot, and Homestuck fanfic! I hope you all like it! I've had this idea for a few days, and it's just been brewing up inside me, so I just had to get it out!
Also, I want to let you all know that I'm very thankful for the support you have been giving me! It really motivates me, and makes me happy! So again, thank you!
Karkat was walking towards his respiteblock, sour mood and face activated, like always. He would still be with Kanaya right now, but Rose had walked in, and he had been quick to abscond. His angry frown deepened, and he shoved his hands deep into his pockets as he passed Terezi's respiteblock. One quick glance inside told Karkat that the stupid Dave douche was with her. He picked up his pace and finally made it to his own respiteblock.
Once inside, Karkat took deep breaths. He tried his best to not let anyone see the true side of him, what he was really made of. The only troll who had really seen that so far was Terezi, but she had long since chosen Dave over Karkat. Every move he had tried to make, it was like a constant one-upmanship with Dave. He was always right behind Karkat, coming up with something better every time.
Karkat took another deep breath and tried to keep the tears at bay. He was trying so hard to keep the depressing thoughts that invaded his thinkpan out, but they managed to worm their way in. With another deep breath, the tears came spilling out against Karkat's will. Silent sobs wracked his chest as he fought to make it all stop, to clear his thinkpan and rid himself of this pain. Memories flooded his thinkpan, coming in the form of all the ways he had failed, which was a lot. His tears began to spill out harder and he had trouble staying quiet.
Karkat's eyes flickered to his sickles He shut his eyes tightly, ushering terrible thoughts out of his thinkpan. He wiped away his tears, smearing away weakness and guilt and failure.
Karkat could see that taking deep breaths and attempting to think happy thoughts was getting him no where. It only made him feel worse. Coming to a terrible conclusion of thoughts, Karkat reached tentatively for the sickles. He didn't belong, and seeing how things were so far, no one would miss him if he was...gone.
Meanwhile, in the next room, Dave and Terezi were playing a game of Truth or Troll, and laughing it up. If you chose truth, the other person would ask a question and you would have to answer truthfully, and Troll was like Dare, but it involved one or another form of Trolling within it. So of course Dave almost always chose Troll, ready for any challenge presented to him. Terezi, on the other hand, would flip her coin to choose for her. Surprisingly, it landed on Truth a lot, and Dave was starting to run out of questions to ask.
Terezi was just about to flip her coin again when she suddenly stopped in her tracks, and turned her head towards the back wall.
"Did you hear that, Dave?" she asked.
"Hear what?" Dave replied lazily.
"It was like...and growl...a pained growl or something...," she answered, trailing off.
"It's probably just another one of Karkat's stupid romcoms," Dave said coldly at the mention of Karkat.
"Yeah, you're probably right..."
Karkat could still hear light conversation coming from Terezi's respiteblock, but he couldn't make out the words. Not that he cared what they were saying or anything. He let another sob break through from his chest, and he brought down his sicle to pierce the skin on his wrist. He gasped at the sudden pain and squeezed his eyes shut once again. He drew the sickle away from his arm, his breath shallow. He then brought it down once again, again, again, creating more and more cuts. His red mutant blood spilled on his shirt, his pants, and trailed slowly to the ground.
Terezi perked up at the scent of blood.
"Dave," she called out.
"What?" he asked, "Are you going to flip your coin or not?"
"No Dave. I have a really bad feeling right now."
"About what?" he asked, voice softening slightly.
"About Karkles. I really don't think he's just watching a romcom right now. I can smell blood." Terezi said, and her face reflected worry as she spoke.
"It all smells the same, doesn't it? It's probably just his tears! He's so girly that he cries over those shitty movies!" Dave retorted, jealous some that the attention had been taken off of him.
"I don't know about that Dave...this sort of has a metallic scent to it," Terezi replied hesitantly, uneasy about Dave's tone of voice.
"Just let him be! If he wanted you, he would've come to you!" Dave said forcefully, trying to instill the idea into Terezi's thinkpan that going to see Karkat wasn't a good idea.
Terezi growled slightly, and said, "Fine..whatever Dave. But if anything has happened to him, I'm blaming you!"
"Yeah, yeah," Dave said, waving her off. "Blame me all you want, but I'm sure 'Karkles' is perfectly fine."
Terezi huffed and flipped her coin, still uneasy. "Okay," she said, slowly agreeing with Dave's notion of assurance that Karkat was okay, and didn't need her.
Back in Karkat's respite block, he had drawn a hell of a lot of blood from himself. He let it pool beneath him as he moved from just his arms to all over. He was covered in painful cuts, hunched over the scary pool of blood that was growing rapidly. Karkat glanced at it, and he was having a hard time breathing now. A quick thought flitted across Karkat's thinkpan, and he slowly dipped his finger into the blood beneath him.
Karkat then dragged the blood across the floor that was still bare, making strange characters that formed the Alternian alphabet as he slowly created words. He stayed hunched over for awhile, and it seemed like hours had passed when he finally finished creating his little note. Looking it over, Karkat decided he was satisfied, and he laid down into his own pool of blood, quite content as his short life flashed before his eyes.
Terezi suddenly hunched over, gripping the sides of her head. She groaned a bit in pain.
"What is it now?" Dave asked as he rolled his eyes, half annoyed and half concerned.
"I just...I can't shake the feeling..."
Terezi stood up without warning and made her way swiftly across the room to the doorway.
"Where the hell are you going?" Dave asked, the concern turning to full blown annoyance. Terezi didn't answer and exited her respiteblock instead, so Dave had no choice but to follow her. He got up tiredly off the floor and followed Terezi as she scurried down the hall to Karkat's respiteblock.
"The smell...," she breathed out as they got closer. Dave almost choked on the intense smell coming from the other side of the door that he and Terezi now stood outside of.
Terezi tried the knob, but it was locked. She started to thrash her shoulder into it wildly, but Dave stopped her, saying,
"I know how to pick a lock, you know."
"Then do it already!" Terezi spat, teal tears starting to spill from her eyes.
Dave rolled his eyes as he pulled out a random paperclip that he happened to have on him, and complied, realizing the intensity of the situation. After all, Terezi was crying, not able to contain her sobs. After a few tries, Dave heard the click, and he couldn't even pull the paperclip out before Terezi had thrown the door open, and fallen to her knees at the situation placed before them. She started panicking as she only heard to sets of breaths, only heard two heartbeats.
"Karkat!" she sobbed, and let her nose lead her to his body. As she crawled towards him, she felt wetness surround her knees, and her hands splashed through it in her rush to get to Karkat. Dave only stood in the doorway, wide-eyed and feeling faint. His heartbeat picked up and he started to go into panic mode as well, not able to keep up his cool kid facade. Sure, he didn't like Karkat all that much, but he never wanted this. He never thought that Karkat would do this.
Dave's breath became quick, and he turned on his heel, running wildly down the hallway toward's Kanaya's respiteblock.
"Rose! Kanaya!" he shouted, the uncontainable panic flooding his voice. He heard no answer and called out again as he got closer.
"ROSE! KANAYA!" He shouted again, his voice carrying out and echoing through the meteor. The two girls heard him and stood up quickly, exiting Kanaya's respiteblock in favor of finding Dave. As Dave rounded a corner that would lead to his destination, Kanaya and Rose almost ran him over in a rush to get to him.
"What is it?" Kanaya asked, worry written all over her face.
"K-Karkat...," Dave stuttered, voice cracking as well, his cool kid facade having completely vanished by this point. His eyes were wide behind the shades that had slipped halfway off his face when he had collided with the two girls, and his jaw quivered. Kanaya and Rose wasted no time in following Dave as he turned around and sprinted back towards Karkat's respiteblock.
As the three arrived, they found that Gamzee had heard Dave and smelled the blood as well, and he was hunched up at the foot of Karkat's bed, staring at his friend on the ground as he rocked back and forth. They also saw Terezi making out with Karkat. As she heard the footsteps approach, she quickly pulled away and turned her head towards the three in the doorway.
"He w-won't come back!" she wailed, her voice fluctuating and never finding its usual tone. "I'm trying and trying but he's gone!" Terezi said, sobbing and burying her face in Karkat's bloody chest. "I'm so sorry, Karkles! I never meant for this to happen! I'm sorry I abandoned you!" she said quietly, her voice becoming raspy, almost nonexistent.
Kanaya's eyes trailed towards the Alternian characters written on the ground, in none other than Karkat's blood. Her hand flew to her mouth and tears threatened to spill out of her eyes as well.
"W-what does it say?" Dave asked. Rose was the one to step forward and answer, having become fluent enough in the Alternian language to be able to read what it said. She read aloud,
"Terezi, if you read this, I want you to know that I'm surprised you didn't see this coming. You're the seer of mind, after all. Did you just not care enough to pay any attention?
Kanaya, you were one of my best friends, but even you weren't there for me when I needed you most. Neither you or Terezi were. Instead, I was pushed away as you found your new favorites, the humans, Dave and Rose.
Rose, I can't say I have much against you. I didn't really talk to you, but I guess you are known to me for screwing things up for Kanaya and I. Also, you were the master of blacking out your fucking session, and I sort of wish it would've been that way all along. Then maybe my group could've claimed the damned reward, and I wouldn't be such a failure.
Gamzee, I hope you find this soon. Maybe before the others. You can give me a nice long shoosh pap if you'd like, but it won't change the circumstances. I guess this is my way of telling you that you meant a lot to me.
Last, and least, Dave. You are an asshole. You've been nothing but a pain to me the entire fucking time I've known you. You and what you think is your clever little bastardly attitude and those stupid shades you choose to hide your mutant red eyes and insecurity behind. Smooth Dave, smooth. I. Hate. You.
Too bad it all had to come to this. I know I was a failure, but you know, I do have feelings too. So I guess thank you Kanaya, Gamzee, and Terezi, for that very slim period of time you were there for me. But you know, it wouldn't have hurt to have been there for me all along, like I was ready to be there for you. But I think I'm pretty fucking content with this situation. It's time I've left you all in peace. So, even through all this, I guess it's sort of surprising even to me that I'm still capable of smiling."
Sure enough, those who could see glanced at Karkat's face. Even through all of that kissing from Terezi, there was still a smile on his face. Not a big goofy grin or anything like that, just a small, slightly upturned corners of the mouth smile. But no matter what kind, it was still there.
Everyone was in tears, save for Dave and Gamzee. Gamzee was still huddled at the foot of the bed, letting out whimper-like honks, and his eyes were dangerously close to letting out tears as well.
Dave though, just stood there, dumbfounded. Clearly, Karkat had a huge grudge against him for taking Terezi away from him. Dave didn't know what to feel, but he felt a small, but constant and growing throbbing in the left side of his chest. He slowly slid down to his knees, the action making his shades slide completely off of his face.
Terezi had adjusted herself so that she was holding Karkat in her arms, her clothes soaked with his blood. The 3 trolls and 2 humans subconsciously formed a small circle around Karkat, and silence pierced the air louder than any noise could. It was so quiet, you could hear everyone's hearts pounding, and the small, infrequent shaky breaths they let out every so often.
"I'm sorry, Karkat. I didn't know that I had made your life such a living hell, that it lead you to end it..."
The words had come out of Dave's mouth before he even realized he had started speaking. Every head in the room turned towards him, save Karkat's, and stared him down. But it wasn't a hard stare, it was a sort of thankful or sympathetic stare. Dave found himself moving closer to Karkat, and taking him from Terezi. Terezi's face reflected his own shock, but she let him take Karkat.
"I'm the one who started this...," Dave said, voice shaky as ever. "I suppose I'm the one who's going to have to fix it..."
Dave then leaned down, going against everything in him screaming for him to stop, and pressed his lips to Karkat's, tenderly but firm. He stayed there as long as he could, only pulling away when he couldn't hold his breath any longer. Several minutes passed, and Kanaya moved to get up.
"I suppose I'll start getting things ready for the corpse party...," she said sadly. She started to stand and turn around, but froze when she heard a murmur that hadn't come from anyone alive. She whipped around to see Karkat stirring in Dave's arms, accidentally reopening cuts that had just started to heal.
"Karkat!" Terezi was the first to squeal, as she launched herself, though gently, at the waking Karkat.
"I guess I'll be getting medical supplies instead!" Kanaya said, and ran off to do so.
Karkat began opening his eyes, and squealed hoarsely in shock to whose face was looking down at him.
"Wh-what...let...go...," Karkat started, barely able to struggle. "He frowned deeply, and tears started to spill from his own eyes. "I..I'm not supposed to...let me go..I can't be here...I'm supposed to be g-gone..."
"Shhhhhh...," Dave whispered, papping Karkat's cheek lightly, mimicking the way Karkat would exactly. "Shhhh..."
Though he grimaced, Karkat did manage to calm down as Dave shoosh papped him. Pretty soon, Kanaya had returned with the supplies, and together, the trolls and humans began to patch up the badly broken and emotional wrecked Karkat.
Once Karkat fell asleep, it was late in the night. Terezi suggested taking shifts to keep an eye on the slumbering Karkat, but Dave told her that he could handle it alone.
"Trust me on this, TZ, you need sleep. I can stop time if I need to, so there's no need to worry about me."
Terezi smiled sadly, but complied, and went with Kanaya, Rose, and Gamzee to the late night feelings jam in Kanaya's respiteblock, soon to be followed by deep, undisturbed sleep.
Dave sat patiently on the bed with Karkat in his lap, and he ran his fingers gently through the sleeping troll's hair, soothing him. After just a few hours of this, while the others slept, Karkat woke. The happy sleep face disappeared instantly when his eyes found Dave.
"Why are you here?" he asked grumpily, his voice merely a rasp.
"I'm the one who hurt you, obviously. I ruined you. So I had to fix it all...which means I also have to take care of you while the others sleep," Dave answered smoothly, never stopping in his caressing of Karkat's hair.
Karkat would never admit it, but he did find that gesture quite soothing. He found himself snuggling into Dave, coming as a surprise to both the human and himself.
"But what if I don't want you?" he asked tiredly, despite him having slept for so long already.
"Doesn't seem to me like you're resisting very much," Dave replied as he wrapped his arms more snuggly around the troll, and looked him in the eyes.
Karkat looked back up at Dave, and this is when he realized that Dave wasn't wearing his shades.
"Where are your..?" Karkat started, but having predicted the question, Dave stopped him mid-sentence.
"Over there on the floor," he said, tilting his head to gesture to the shades lying unceremoniously on the ground.
"Oh...," Karkat said simply. He then shifted slightly, and spoke up, asking,
"Did you really mean it when you said you were sorry about all this?"
"You heard that?" Dave asked, mild surprise weighing down his voice.
"Unfortunately, I witnessed the whole thing. I was dead, yet I was still there. But it was like watching from a 3rd troll's point of view."
"Huh..," Dave murmured. "So why didn't you come back when Terezi was trying to revive you?"
"I can't choose, fuckass. Don't think I'm terribly happy that you were the one to do it. I didn't, no, DON'T even want to be here," Karkat spat out icily. But at the same time, that iciness was only halfhearted.
"But..Strider apologies are rare, okay? And I'm still sorry. I didn't know that I had caused you this much pain," Dave said, his voice cracking slightly on the last word.
Karkat's breath hitched, and he didn't want to admit to his pain, but he had to recognize it at least. "Whatever," he said simply.
Dave wasn't thinking as he pressed his lips once again to the grumpy troll's. Karkat froze at first, but something in him welcomed this affection. It wasn't long before he started kissing back, moving his lips in time to the other Knight's.
Dave was surprised when Karkat kissed him back, and he shivered as a wonderful sensation shot through him. He was sharing an affectionate moment with Karkat, who didn't have affectionate moments to begin with. It made Dave feel special.
Karkat finally pulled away, his face dusted with pink that grew considerably darker as his eyes met Dave's, who was blushing madly.
"So much for the cool kid," Karkat said, laughing just a little bit.
Dave froze.
"What?" Karkat asked.
"You..you...laughed..."
"What of it?"
"I think that is the first time I have ever heard you laugh, Karkat," Dave said, sort of speechless. He replayed the sound over and over in his head. That laugh was like music to his ears. He had never once in his entire life on this stupid meteor heard Karkat laugh, and he wasn't sure anyone else had, either. He relished in that fact, and it spread a warm, comforting sensation throughout his body.
Karkat dawned on the fact that he didn't even remember the last time he laughed as he heard Dave speak those words. He didn't know he was even capable of laughing anymore, thought he had long since forgotten how to. Karkat let a little smile play on his face. He had forgotten how even the smallest laugh could make him feel so good on the inside.
"Maybe I should laugh a little more then," Karkat whispered, groggy now as exhaustion claimed his body once again.
"Yeah, maybe," Dave replied. He hugged his little crabkat to him closer, snuggling closer to him, and letting the soft breathing of the now sleeping Knight next to him lure him into a nice, comforting sleep.
More AN: Thanks to everyone who read this, I hope you liked it! Maybe review and tell me what you think? xD Also, check out the poll on my profile! :D
