I know, I know... I should really finish my other fics before starting a new one but this first chapter has been written since about a week after the Dr Covington episode aired and I promised myself I wouldn't post until 1) my other fics were completed and 2) this one was completed so I could just upload a chapter every few days. It's been bugging me just sitting there, in it's folder, with no one to read it :(
They were standing in one of the bland white corridors of the makeshift, underground hospital. Agents Keen and Ressler were currently in the middle of a staring match after their argument, or rather, Resslers heated rant at her. Her partner, her friend, had just accused her of becoming more and more like Reddington over the past year. The trouble for Liz was that, now the words had been spoken out loud to her, she realised that they were, in fact, true. Was she hurt by the accusations Ressler had just made? Yes, but that didn't matter. She wasn't angry, but rather humiliated, that the criminal they were working with ways of life were rubbing off on her. As she stood there staring at her partner, she could see the regret building up in him but she wasn't ready nor in the mood to continue talking. Instead, she backed up slightly, turned on her heel and started to walk away in the direction of the improvised family waiting room. It was only then that Ressler seemed to finally find his voice.
"Keen... Liz, look, I -"
She cut him off by holding up a hand as she continued to walk away, not daring to turn around as tears threatened to fall. She couldn't let Ressler see that. She turned the corner, carried on walking but stopped outside the waiting room. The parents of the young boy Dr. Covington was currently operating on were sitting on the long couch, clutching at each other with their heads dipped low in silent prayer. Liz knew that, the surgery Covington was performing, was the only way to save the boy and, in her mind, allowing him to continue had been the right decision but now... she had a lingering feeling of doubt. Like Ressler had said, she was making trade-offs, thinking more like a criminal than an Agent and that's not the person she wanted to be. As she stood there looking through the glass at the two distraught parents they'd interrogated little over an hour ago, she couldn't help but wonder what it felt like to go through what they were going through. Would she even be able to cope knowing that her child could die at any moment from something she couldn't control? It was at this moment she was truly glad that she'd pulled out of the adoption when she had.
They still had a couple of hours until Covington came out of surgery, so she thought it was best to head back outside to the car. She used her set of keys to open the passenger side and settled herself in to the seat; reclining it back slightly and placing her booted feet up on the dash. She lent her head back and closed her eyes, taking in the peaceful silence around her and using it as an opportunity to think. She thought back to the conversation she'd had with Cooper that morning in his office, and the recommendation he'd gotten from Dr. Friedman. Was it really possible to take a couple of months off? Could she really do it? The more she thought about it, the more she realised that a full two months was a bit too long and maybe six weeks would be better. Yes, that's what she would do. She had to talk to Reddington, let him know but she would do that back at the office later, after she informs Cooper.
Liz managed to relax her mind and body enough to drift off to sleep in her semi-comfortable position. She had no idea how much time had passed before she was jerked awake by her phone buzzing in her back pocket. By the time she had extracted the damn thing, it had stopped ringing, though Resslers name stayed on the screen for a further few seconds. She didn't return the call, knowing that he would contact her again if he needed to. Liz straightened up in her seat, leaning far enough forward to check her reflection in the rear-view mirror; her face was a little puffy from sleep but nothing too major and her make-up hadn't smudged. Her phone buzzed once again in her hand to signal a new message from her partner.
*Covington's done with the surgery, he's bringing the boy out now and going to talk to the parents. I've already called for back-up and they'll be here in ten. I don't know where you are or what the hell you're doing but you need to get back in here.*
She sighed to herself before climbing out the car and locking it behind her. She made her way back inside the shop front and down the stairs to the basement hospital. She found Ressler standing outside the waiting room whilst the parents of the young boy thanked Covington for saving their childs life. Liz stood away from her partner, not wanting to give him an opportunity to start a conversation. After a few minutes, Covington came out and bypassed Ressler, who started to protest, before coming to a stop right in front of Liz.
"Thank you, for allowing me to continue." He held his hands out in front of him as she removed her cuffs.
"I didn't do it for you, I did it for the boy," she cuffed one hand and motioned for him to turn around, which he did and clipped the metal ring around the other hand to join them behind his back. She nodded towards the parents still sitting in the waiting room. "And for them. Is he gonna be okay?"
"Prognosis is looking good. He now has the ability to live a full and happy life, which I'm certain wouldn't be the case if he'd had to wait for treatment." They both stood facing the direction of the room opposite them and as she stared forward, Ressler caught her eye.
He had witnessed the whole exchange between Keen and Covington, heard every word that was said and saw every move that was made. Standing there stiffly against the wall, there was now no doubt in his mind that his partner had made the right call and he was fast wishing that he could take back every thing he had said to her a few hours before. He knew that that couldn't happen but was hoping that he could get through to her how sorry he was on the journey back.
Distant voices of the swat sounded from somewhere in the building and all three of them turned towards the end of the corridor. Mere seconds later the voices grew louder and twenty odd men clad in black stormed in pointing their guns. Both agents instantly pulled their badges out and held them up to be checked. Liz spoke briefly to one of the men before handing Covington over to be taken outside. She slowly made her way over to Ressler, who straightened up and gave her a small half smile, only for it to be received with a sigh.
"I'm gonna escort Covington back to the Blacksite. You can handle over seeing things here on your own right?" She looked tired and he knew it was best not to argue with her. Instead, he just gave her a curt nod before motioning over one of the other agents. Liz gave him a small nod back before turning away from him and making her way outside to the waiting car holding Covington. As the car pulled away from the building she mentally prepared herself for the meeting she would be having with Cooper.
An hour later she was standing outside Cooper's office, building up the courage to actually knock on the door. She'd gotten back and set Covington up in interrogation with Samar watching over him as he wrote out the confession of his crimes. Deciding it was time, she took one last deep, steadying breath before knocking on the door. Cooper's sharp, clipped voice came through not even a second later.
"Come in."
She walked in and pushed the door closed behind her.
"Agent Keen, good work today. I understand Agent Ressler is still at the scene?" There was something off in his voice.
"Yes, Sir."
"Agent Ressler has already alerted me of his decision to allow Covington to continue surgery." What? Ressler had told Cooper is was his idea... why? She didn't correct him, not wanting him question Ressler for lying, so she just nodded. "I've told him I want a full report on my desk tomorrow, I expect the same from you."
"Yes, Sir."
"Very well, what is it I can do for you?" His gaze tore through her and she almost stopped herself from revealing what was on her mind.
"Sir... I wanted to discuss with you Dr Friedman's recommendation of time off."
Cooper gave her a puzzled look as he lent back in his chair and removed his glasses. She could tell that he wasn't entirely sure where she would be going with this conversation, having made it clear to him earlier that she wouldn't be taking the doctors advice. She shifted awkwardly from foot to foot before Cooper waved his hand.
"Have a seat, Agent Keen."
Liz moved to the chair in front of Coopers desk and lowered herself in to it. She had gone over and over in her head what she wanted to say but now she was in a position to do it, she just couldn't find the right words.
"I... I've had a chance to - think about everything. She's right, I haven't grieved for Tom or dealt with the fact that he lied to me our entire marriage. This whole thing with Reddington and Berlin and to be honest, the pure concept of the blacklist is so over-whelming and I was thrown in this task force off the back of no experience that I've realised that I need a break from it all." She looked up at her boss. He was regarding her with a strange expression, almost like sympathy but with praise, like he was proud of her for admitting how she felt. "I have a few things to sort out from when my father died and - from the end of my marriage that I haven't been able to do because of work. I think it would help me to move forward with a clear head if I did. I'm accepting the offer of leave, but proposing that it be shortened to six weeks, effective from today."
She finished her speech and heaved a sigh of relief, it was over, it was done and God did she feel better now. Liz had never been one to bow down and admit defeat but even though she had admitted she needed the break, she still felt in control of the situation. Cooper nodded slowly and gave her a brief smile.
"Elizabeth, from what you've said now, I'm inclined to agree. I'll arrange everything in terms of paperwork stating the leave. All I ask is that you remain to finish your reports from today and drop them in to me before you leave."
"Yes, Sir. Thank you." She stood up then left the room, hurrying to hers and Resslers office. First glance told her that he still had not returned from the scene but she tried not to care. She actually hoped that she wouldn't have to see him again before she left, it would be easier that way. Sighing to herself, she decided to call Reddington sooner rather than later to inform him of her plans, no doubt he would have something to say about it. The phone rang no more than once before Dembe's deep voice answered.
"Is he there, Dembe?" She heard the phone changing hands.
"Lizzie! My dear, what do I owe the pleasure? I'm pleased to hear that Dr Covington is in your custody."
"Yeah, we got him. Listen, Reddington, I'm taking some time off, going to go to Nebraska for a while, sort out Sam's house and that. I want a complete break. No cases, no nothing, just me at my dad's house."
"Has something happened, Lizzie? This is an awfully big decision to make all of a sudden. When I spoke to you this morning you mentioned no plans of taking some time off."
"I'm fine, it is something I've been thinking about for a while actually," she lied to him. She knew full well that he either already knew something was wrong or he would do pretty soon. She wouldn't be the one to tell him though. "I just want a little time for myself, is that too much to ask?"
"Well, I won't argue with that. Pack a few bags tonight and I'll have Dembe pick you up in the morning and have you taken in my jet tomorrow, no strings, just to save you paying for commercial."
"Fine, I hadn't actually gotten round to booking tickets so that helps a lot, thanks. Listen; I know you only talk to me but you're still gonna give the team blacklisters right?"
"Good. Well, I guess I could make an exception for a few weeks. I must dash, things to do, people to see. Good bye, Lizzie."
The call ended and Liz placed the phone in her purse. That went easier than expected, she was convinced Reddington would try and persuade her against the idea but the fact that he hadn't pushed the matter concerned her, but just not enough to call him back and demand to know everything he knows.
She spent the next hour and a half speed writing her reports, finishing them quicker than she had expected to. She spent a further twenty minutes collecting anything and everything she would need, deciding to clear her desk ready for her fresh start in six weeks. She stared at her mainly bare desk, noticing that it looked much the same as when it had been assigned to her. She remembered the day that she found out she would be sharing an office with the agent who hated her, hated the fact that Reddington chose her, resented her for being able to converse with the criminal whenever the hell she pleased, and after five years he was able to look the man in the face yet wasn't able to put him behind bars where he deserved to be. It had taken a lot of cases and a lot of convincing to prove that she was a worthy agent without a hidden agenda. For a year she had worked along side Ressler and they had grown to trust each other but after today, she wasn't sure she could do that anymore. She needed a partner that would tell her when she was slipping, not blurt it out in frustration in the middle of a case.
She heaved a heavy sigh as she walked out the office, closing the door behind her before taking a detour to Coopers office on the way to the elevator. She knocked before being told to come in. She froze in the doorway upon seeing the face of her partner sitting in the chair she had vacated not two hours ago.
"Sir, I have my reports for you." She walked forward, handed him the files and stepped back towards the door. "Is there anything else I need to do before leaving?"
He shook his head. "No, I think I've covered everything. Enjoy your break, Agent Keen."
She nodded to him, avoided Resslers eye, turned on her heel and left the room, closing the door behind her. She speed walked it to the elevator and luckily wasn't stopped by anyone and as far as she could tell, Ressler hadn't followed her out either. She waited patiently for the doors to open and as she stepped in, she heard someone call her name behind her. She turned to face Ressler and pressed the 'up' button as he jogged towards her. He opened his mouth to say something but the doors closed in his face, cutting her off from view. She could picture the look on his face, neck going red from frustration and she knew he would be cursing out loud. She suppressed the urge to smile as the elevator took her up to her car.