pairings: mild Korrasami

warnings: book 3/4 spoilers

a/n: Unspecified time period, presumably after the scene in the trailer where Korra rescues Asami, Mako and Wu, and where Asami was fighting Kuvira's Metal-benders on the top of the train car. Hope you enjoy, as I have worked on this piece for a few days. After seeing the most recent episode, I had to finish it to reflect on Korra's journey as a person, hopefully they're not too OOC. Enjoy!

Silence.

Asami faces the wall of the broken train, and Korra looks at the back of the woman she can barely remember.

She's matured, Korra realizes. She's grown into something wonderful these past few years, and I wasn't around to see her blossom.

It is just the two of them in the wreckage of the train. Mako has taken Wu into the corridor to tend to his injuries (despite the latter's miserable attempts to 'sway' the Avatar into his personal cohorts), leaving them alone with their thoughts, and the sound of their breathing.

It is Korra, who speaks first. "Asami—"

"How was your trip here?" Korra flinches. The tender voice that sent her off to sleep, the kind words that poured out, reassuring her that she was going to be alright, was gone. Instead, like the icy tundras of her threshold, her voice held no warmth. It was cold, twisted, bitter, and full of pain.

'You've been disconnected for too long.' Toph's words rang ever-true. Zaheer's taunts, Amon's jeers, they meant nothing to her now.

"Asami, I…"

Asami clenches her fist, with her knuckles turning white. Korra can see the minute trembles of her shoulders, but if it were from anger or sadness was impossible to decipher. What have I done? "Was it nice, all those months away? Pleasurable to go away and see the sights of the world? Able to leave all your troubles behind whilst everyone here was worried sickabout what could have happened to you?"

Don't get angry. Don't snap at her. She's just upset, Korra. You've upset a lot of people, become disconnected from them. Let her vent. It's the least you owe her. Oh, Spirits, Asami… I'm so sorry.

Instead of retorting to her defence, Korra closes her eyes, and takes a step towards her. The train still isn't moving, and she can just make out the darkening skies of dusk outside.

"You said for me not to tell Bolin or Mako about how you felt, and I did! I kept your word! Why couldn't you trust me with this? Leaving for so long alone? I thought…" Korra sees Asami's ears flush, "I thought I—we allmeant something to you! I thought we were all friends, Korra! I thought…"

With another step forward, Asami's emotions infect Korra, and each stable breath becomes shaky. "You are my friend, Asami."

Asami scoffs. "Friends trust each other."

"Asami…I couldn't even trust myself to keep anyone else safe." The skies are now painted with the darkness that shrouds Korra's heart, cloaking it in guilt for the one person who had been there for her, through it all. Betrayal was seldom in Korra's personality, but even an embodiment of mortal blood and spiritual presence could make mistakes that were so unflatteringly human.

Wanting to keep everyone else safe, away from the past ghosts that haunted her mind. Not sparing a single thought that those who she desired to keep safe were fraught with danger when she was away. The danger of a mental collapse because their friend, their older-sister, wasmissing, and had been lying to keep them 'safe' in a world running rampant with hazards every day.

This world was balanced in it's natural imbalance. Humans were not an ordered species, no matter the mind that tried to control the masses. Humans were a species of stubborn temperaments, denied hypocrisies, and tragically-beautiful mistakes. But they were also a species of unity, of compassion and intelligence, and of companionship meaning more than the primal human instinct of self-preservation.

"You…you left us, Korra…"

That is what Korra sought to keep balanced.

"I am so, so sorry." And tentatively, Korra places a hand on Asami's trembling shoulder, and gently turns her around

Tears stain her face, mascara cause black lines to mark her cheeks. Korra knows that these marks will fade eventually, but the internal scars that her absence made will never be able to disappear.

"I'm so sorry. I should have—out of everyone, I knew I should have told you, I know." Asami seldom allowed herself to cry, Korra suddenly remembers. Despite everything that has happened to her, with all that she has lost, she always put the emotions of everyone else. Even now, Asami said 'we' instead of 'I'.

Spirits, she could just face-palm.

Recovery from a trauma such as hers wasn't an easy feat, she could give herself that leeway, but that didn't excuse the way she had just cast her friends aside, cast Asami away from her so easily. Someone who had dedicated so much time, so much effort, to see her get better didn't deserve it. How much emotional exhaustion had she faced, with seeing one of her best friends journey through hell and back through her mind everyday? To add pressures of a company as well?

Too young, Korra thinks. She's too young, she's not even been given the chance to enjoy her youth, not really. At least I can put her mind at rest for this.

With no words, Korra slowly puts her arms around Asami's trembling body, and embraces her tightly. It is slightly awkward—Korra has never been able to boast about her height, and Asami is much taller than her, but that fact will not deter her from hugging her. It is the least she can owe her—with so many months she gave so much intimacy, it is only fair that Korra initiates this.

She rubs her back, feeling that the material of her clothing has torn due to the previous fight. Korra's mind fills with the scent of her perfume—though it is dulled through her natural aroma, it still holds steadfast. She can feel Asami weeping into her shoulder, gripping onto her like she would float away into the sky if she didn't keep a firm grasp on her.

"I'm sorry."

"Mm…"

"I'm so sorry, Asami, I'm so sorry—I-I won't shut you out again, I promise…"

"D-don't worry me again, please…"

"I-I won't, Asami, I swear…"

Outside, the battle is beginning to reach it's pinnacle. Kuvira will not rest, and her train will continue to scope the planet until every grain of sand is wedged under her fist. And whilst this train is wrecked, shrapnel and chairs and furniture broken into pieces beyond repair, they're only inanimate. Her and Asami are real. And she knows the both of them will soon be thrust back into the thick of the battle, both bloodlust and loss a very harsh reality for them. But for now, Korra will put her Avatar duties aside, and comfort the earthly tethers that she once took for granted.

After all…

I'll have to die before I make you cry like this again, Asami.