I sat cross-legged on the edge of the dock with dried tears on my cheeks and the Colonel's ambrosia in my palm. My ears burned along with my eyes but I no longer cared. I heard footsteps but didn't turn. Who gives a shit if someone was behind me? If I was lucky they would push me in.
She sat beside me silently, staring at the lake. Out of the corner of my eye, Alaska's hair glinted in the dying light. Without asking, she took the milk jug from my hand. "Do you ever care that we drink all the time now?" I laughed at this ludicrous thought. "Caring be damned. These demons need to drown." Her throat moved as she took a huge gulp. A bitter laugh came out of her lips. "Too bad they know how to swim."
I laid back and watched the clouds. Why did the Colonel get in the car that night? What was he thinking?
Devoid of warning, Alaska stood, pulling off her shirt. Before I could ask why, she dove into the lake. I jumped to my feet and stared. After a few seconds her head bobbed back to the surface. She moved to float on her back. "Get your ass in the water, Pudge."
I slipped off my shirt and plopped into the water. She pushed my head under unexpectedly and I came back up spluttering. She was laughing for the first time since the Colonel died. That sound was better than the sweetest melody. Down she pushed again and I rose coughing. I didn't want the laughter to leave but I had to make her quit. "Alaska, stop! I'm drowning!" she pulled back and sighed.
When I caught my breath I paddled to her. She pushed herself into my arms and rested her head on my shoulder. "I miss him Pudge." Her tears fell to mingle with the water. My grip tightened around her. "I miss him too Alaska."
We stayed there until the sun left, until the moon rose, until the stars peeked out, both of us crying on the other. While I looked for who Alaska really was, I lost my first best friend and found my great perhaps.