What If songfic
Summary: When Sonny is dating Chad she can't help but feel put out by everything he is doing. He is not being a good boyfriend, scratch that, he wasn't even being a good friend. She doesn't know what to do anymore, so she decides to write out her feeling into a song and maybe, just maybe, he will understand.
Disclaimer: I don't own Sonny with a Chance, or the song What if by Ashley Tisdale. Though I own this story plot and my computer that I am using to type this story.
Sonny's POV
I don't know what to do anymore, I mean I really like Chad, and he is my boyfriend. It's just...I don't know. Things just seem off with him lately, it all started after our first date, he just...changed, I guess. I really don't think I can take it anymore, I used to be able to talk to him and he to me, but I feel like that has changed. He won't let me speak in front of his friends or out in public. He says I am wrong all the time and that I can't help it that I am on So Random! or as he calls it "Chuckle City." even though he knows I hate it.
As soon as all this started I started to write things in my song book again, to get rid of these pent up emotions. Now I think that there are just too many, and writing just won't fix it. I am barely myself anymore except around my friends though it is mostly an act that only my best friend, Tawni, can see through, oh and Zora, but she knows almost everything. So since they both found out, the have become the only people I talk to about this. All I know is that I need to do something or else I'm going to explode.
Normal POV
Sonny walked into Condor Studios and instead of walking straight to her show, So Random!, she decided to walk over and see Chad at the Mackenzie Falls set. Without Chad's knowledge she became really good friends with the girls over there and they hung out alot, but without Tawni because they still didn't get along. As soon as Sonny walked over and got to security, she just went to walk throught but the new security guard stopped me.
"You can't go in there." He said and that just shocked Sonny but she figured that he was new and didn't know what he was talking about.
"Yes I can, I'm Chad's girlfriend." Sonny said really politely and with her signiture smile in place.
"Really?" The security guard said with a laugh and his eye brows raised.
"Yes really. We started dating a month ago." Sonny said really confused which made the security guard suprised.
"You really are his girlfriend aren't you?" The guy asked and when she nodded he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This was going to be hard. The guy continued, "I am really sorry miss. but your on the banned wall."
"What? Why would I be on the banned wall? Chad never..." Sonny words fell off and the security guard felt really bad for her, I mean come on, who puts their girlfriend on the banned wall and without telling her.
"I am sorry but I am going to have ask you leave miss." the securtiy guard said softly to her and he saw tears clouding her eyes and felt worse.
"I-its fine. I-I-i'll just b-be going. I-if C-chad co-comes out t-tell him. A-actually p-please d-don't even me-mention I w-was here. O-okay?" Sonny sobbed her tears starting to fall in heavy streams.
"Of course and I really am sorry." he said as she walked away. How could a person be so cruel, he wanted to say something but that would only get him fired.
Sonny was rushing through the halls trying to hurry back to her own studio but her tears were making it hard. In her rush she ended up bumping into someone one.
"Oof." The other person said as Sonny hit him in the back sending his mail cart crashing into the oppisite wall. "Oh come on, again?" The person questioned angrily but then looked down noticing that the person hadn't even tried to get up. To his shock it was Sonny Monroe, he worked for the studios so it was his job to help her. Somewhat.
"Hey, Sonny whats wrong?" The guy asked carefully as he pulled her to a sitting position on the wall.
"Everything Josh, everything." Sonny said as she continued to cry and softly bang her head on the wall behind her.
"Hey don't do that. You'll hurt yourself." Josh said as he successfully tried to get her to stop banging her head. "Now what happened?" Josh continued.
"Chad put me on the banned wall." Sonny whispered but Josh heard it and was shocked, who puts their own girlfriend on a stupid banned wall, he thought.
"Oh Sonny, I may not know you very well but I am sorry. Here let me get you back to your dressing room. Okay?" Josh asked and was relived when she nodded. He didn't like her like that but he didn't want her to get hurt or hurt somebody else either.
Sonny stood up with the help of Josh and they eventually made it back to her dressing room after Josh got his mail cart back. "Thank you Josh and I am so sorry for running into you."
Josh laughed and said "No big deal. Oh and here is your fan mail." which ended up being a huge stack.
"Thanks. Bye Josh" Sonny said as she opened her dressing room door. As soon as she walked in, sonny knew she just wanted to be alone but no. Her whole cast had to be in her dressing room at this exact moment.
"Hey Sonny whats u..." Tawni's words fell at a stand still and she got up and dragged Sonny gently to the couch. Tawni then continued "Everybody out. I need to talk to Sonny." Then the protestes started so Tawni yelled, "NOW." which got people leaving.
"Sonny. Hey what happened?" Tawni asked and she was actually being sincere. She heard Sonny mumble something but couldn't hear exactly what she said. "What was that?" Tawni said.
"Chad put me on the banned wall." Sonny said clearly because her tears had stopped a little bit ago. Tawni knew that Sonny felt like something was wrong and hers and Sonny knew something was up.
"WHAT? How could he do that? Your his girlfriend." Tawni said shocked and a little happy, she thinks she had just the thing for Sonny to do, to get back at Chad, or at least tell him how much he was hurting her.
"I know I am his girlfriend, or at least I thought I was. I just don't know anymore Tawni. I really don't and I'm scared. I want him to stop treating me like this, but what if, I can only have him if this is how he treats me?" Sonny said confused but in her mind she didn't know weither or not what she was saying was true.
"Sonny, if this is how he treats you and he still does after you sing your song, then you don't need him. You could do so much better. Sonny I am not just saying this because you are my best friend but I am saying this because I want your shirt." Tawni said trying to get a laugh out of Sonny which successfully worked. "But truthfully, the reason I am saying this is because it is very true. You don't need a jerk as a boyfriend, or husband, heck even as a friends with benefits." Tawni continued.
"Thank you so much Tawni and your right. If he doesn't like me for me, or keeps on like this I don't need him." Sonny said and Tawni did another very rare thing for her. She opened her arms and gave Sonny a hug.
With the hug she whispered to Sonny, "Good luck tonight with the song. We will all be rooting for you." Then Tawni stood up and left to give Sonny some privacy. After she left Tawni said to herself "Your being nice and pretty."
Sonny and Tawni's dressing room
Sonny's POV
After Tawni left, I ended up just laying on the couch while thinking about Chad, and how weird he was being. When I started to think about the memories but I thought enough is enough. I will show him tonight, that you don't mess with Sonny Monroe. I stood up feeling better than I have in a long time, I started to go to the bag that I kept here, I grabbed out my song book from it. My song book was a gold coloring with the words 'Sonny's Songs' in silver lettering. This book held many songs, some good, others not so good, but for tonight only one song was on my mind. My song that I wrote for Chad and only him, the song was titled, 'What if'.
When I grabbed the book I walked back over to the couch and started to go over the lyrics but some of the phrases had the memories drew me in and there was nothing I could do about it. Not that I tried either. I remembered the time that I wrote this one little phrase:
I'm so sick of worrying that you're gonna quit over anything
I could trip and you'd let go like that
and everything that we ever were seems so fake but not the hurt
'Cause you don't know the good things from the bad
Flashback
Chad and I had just left Condor Studios for a little walk while holding hands, that I of course asked him if he wanted to go on. He would have never asked me. Now I just didn't know what to say and Chad asked really rudely, "So Sonny did you just want to walk in silence or did you actually have something to tell me that is more important then us over at 'Mackenzie Falls' doing real acting?"
He didn't even look at me and I said back quietly, "Well I just figured that being as we didn't get alot of time together, you might of just wanted to do something, even if it was just being with each other."
Chad even had the nerve to say to me, "Yeah, yeah but 'Mackenzie Falls' does serious acting, unlike your show. So you wouldn't know that we don't have time to just take a random walk. God how can you be so stupid? Don't worry though I forgive you."
All I could think was 'You forgive me, YOU FORGIVE ME. Your the one who is being rude, and yet you forgive me.' I was so preoccupied I didn't see the step that led into a puddle and I tripped on it and instead of Chad trying to keep me from falling he let go of my hand and said, "Sonny, god you need to learn to watch where you are going. I can't get this outfit dirty. It costs more than your house!"
That was it, he didn't even try to help me up, or offer me his jacket, AND I WAS WEARING A WHITE, NOW SEE THROUGH SHIRT. I just said, "Yeah, yeah whatever. Look I have to get back. Bye." After that I took off running back to the studios and was lucky enough not to end up in any papers or magazines because some random person who saw the exchange gave me her jacket which I then tried to give her money for but she wouldn't let me.
End Flashback
I couldn't believe him, he never even apologized for that day. Then the next phrase I wrote sent me spiraling into another flashback. The phrase was:
Everytime I speak you try and stop me
'Cause every little thing I say is wrong
You say you're noticing but you never see
This is who I really am that you can't believe
Flashback
This time I was walking into the commisanary with my cast, in out costumes for the 'check it out girls' sketch, when I ran into Chad, who had his cast behind him, they still had to act mean when he was around.
"Hey Sonny, nice outfit" He said sarcasticly making his whole cast laugh and him smirk. I felt really hurt by this but I wasn't going to let him see not anymore. I just shook my head wondering how I could be with a sweet caring guy in the beggining but then have him turn into a rude, hurtful, jerkthrob.
"Hey Chad, I hate yours too" I said to him being entirely truthful, I hated his uniform, and he knew this but this time instead of joking like he would have when we first started to date he freaked.
"Excuse me? You did not just say you hate my uniform!" Chad nearly screamed causing everyone in the room to jump and look at us.
"Yes, yes I did. It is bland just like your stupid sh..." The words stopped coming when Chad covered my mouth with his hand.
He then said, "Just like I tell Portylin. Never speak without a script. You never say anything right, if you did, you wouldn't have said anything wrong about Mackenzie Falls." Everyone gasped at him, I ripped his arm away and I was finally going to say something.
"Everything I say is wrong huh? So I guess all those times I said that I loved you were wrong because I said them." I said and tore out of the room, he didn't even try to come after me. Only my cast did and that hurt.
End Flashback
That happened right before he banned me, in fact I didn't even know if we were still dating. I stopped reading the song after that, I couldn't afford to stat crying again and I knew all the lyrics anyway. I then looked at the clock and realized I only had a half an hour to get to the karaoke contest. I looked at my outfit and realized that I still had to get dressed.
I hurried over to my closet and started to shuffle through my clothes, I ended up picking a red and black dress, black heels, and a ruby necklace that her father gave her before he passed away. The dress was nearly all red with ruffels of black above her chest, and around her hips, along with some black fabric hanging out from under the dress. The heels were all black but they wrapped a little ways up her legs. (Links are at the bottom)
I knew that this outfit would wow the pants of Chad and I loved that idea. I put the out fit on and thought that it looked pretty good but thought I was missing something so I quickly curled my hair and there. The outfit was complete.
I quickly walked down the halls to the commisonary knowing that everyone would be there because Mr. Condor ordered everyone to be there. I stopped right before the door to take a deep breath. Then I pushed open the door and walked in, I was welcomed by many gasps and whispers. I smiled and starting walking over to my friends who were go figure sitting right next to the Mackenzie Falls cast. Chad never even looked up when I walked in, and when I sat down he still never looked at me only talking to his friends with his arm around a new female guest star. My chest tightned and I let out a quiet sob that only Tawni caught apperently. She saw what I was looking at and whispered that she was going to hurt him. I went to answer back to her but Mr. Condor walked in and said "Welcome to the 3rd annual karaoke contest. Wow look at this only girls signed up for the contest as usual. Okay so first up is Portlyn, then Tawni, followed by Chasity, and ending with Sonny. Good luck."
When Mr. Condor said my name, Chad still didn't do anything, wait he tightened his hold on the girl next to him. Portlyn walked up on stage in just some confortable clothes which made Chad give her the evil eye because everyone but Portlyn and Chasity were in their uniforms. The others didn't seem to want to be in them though. As soon as Portlyn stepped on to stage the music playing to the song "If Cupid had a heart" by Selena Gomez started to play. She danced around, and just had fun, her voice was amazing.
Tawni and Chasity's songs went by pretty fast though they were great. Tawni sang "Headstrong" by Ashley Tisdale, and Chasity sang "L.A. Made Me" by Alexz Johnson. The songs were wonderful but now it was my turn. I walked up to the stage with my cast, the lights turned off when I got to my spot and they got to their instruments. Tawni was playing piano, Nico was playing guitar, Grady was playing drums, and Zora controlled the lighting. Chad still wasn't looking at me but trying to talk back to his cast, they ignored him and flashed me a smile. Portlyn and Chasity, gave us a thumbs up. Chad finaly got sick of them ignoring him, and went to look for what they were looking at. When he saw it was me, and in this outfit, his eyes got wide and he sallowed hard. The spotlights that were on each of us keep changing colors and I said into the microphone "I will be singing a song I wrote called "What If" and my cast will be helping me." My cast started to play the music and finally I began to sing and everyone but my cast, Portlyn, and Chasity were shocked and it was fun to see.
Don't speak
I can't believe
This is here, happening
Our situation isn't right
Get real, who you playing with?
I never thought he'd be like this
You were supose to be there by my side
When you say that you want me
I just don't believe it
Your always ready to give up
but never turn around
But what if i need you baby
would you even try to save me
or would you find some lame excuse
to never be true
What if i said i loved you
would you be the one to run to
or would you watch me walk away
without a fight
I'm so sick of worrying that you're gonna quit over anything
I could trip and you'd let go like that
and everything that we ever were seems so fake but not the hurt
'Cause you don't know the good things from the bad
When i say that i want you
you know that i mean it
and in my hour of weakness
there's still time to try
But what if i need you baby
would you even try to save me
or would you find some lame excuse
to never be true
What if i said i loved you
would you be the one to run to
or would you watch me walk away
without a fight
Everytime i speak
you try and stop me
cause every little thing i say is wrong
you say your noticing but you never see
this is who i really am
that you can't believe
makes me wanna know right now
if it's me you'll live without
or would you change your mind
What if i need you
But what if i need you baby
would you even try to save me
or would you find some lame excuse
to never be true
What if i said i loved you
would you be the one to run to
or would you watch me walk away
without a
Oh baby, What if i need you
(what if i need you?)
yeah yeah
(what if i need you?)
What if i need, what if i need you?
(what if i need you?)
Oh oh i need you
(what if i need you?)
i need you you you
The whole time I looked at Chad and he looked right back at me with sad eyes. Finally he stood up, walked up the stage, and stood next to me. He said "I am so sorry Sunshine. I never realized how much I was hurting you and you were right that day when I said that you were wrong about everything. I am sorry. Please forgive me, I will be better. I promise. Just please stay with me?" He was pleading with me and I had so much to say but figured I will save it for later. I slowly nodded which made him smile, and lean into kiss me but I held up my hand. He looked at me confused.
I continued to look at him and said "Before we go there again. We have alot to talk about. You can wait a little while longer because you didn't seem to mind the space for the time when you were being mean."
Chad nodded and said "Okay, Sunshine. I love you."
I smiled and said "I love you too Chad. One thing though, this is your last chance."
AN- I hope you liked it. It is my first one shot. Please R and R.
Links
http:/www. f a n c y p o c k e t . s g / i m a g e s / P / 6 2 7 1 3 4 P . j p g (Dress. Type link with no spaces.)
http:/www.g l i t t e r i n g s t o n e s . c o m / I m a g e s / R u b y - N e c k l a c e . j p g (Necklace. Type link with no spaces.)
