Kurt ran his fingers through his hair as he gave the cab driver directions to his work. He had lived in New York for 5 years now, however he could never get used to the awful smell of a taxi cab. He tried to breathe out of his mouth, since this cabby obviously chose not to shower for a long time. To distract himself from the smell, he looked out the window and saw that it was still raining pretty hard. Kurt made an annoyed noise since he had left his umbrella back at his apartment.
"Here we are. That'll be $8.25." A rough voice from the front of the car told Kurt.
"Here, keep the change." Kurt told the cab driver, while handing him a 10 dollar bill. Kurt grabbed his messenger bag and stepped out into the cold. He ran past the people walking, with his bag over his head to protect his hair from the rain. He opened the door and walked into the building letting the warmth wash over him. Walking past security, the small brunette stepped into the elevator and pressed his floor. After a flood of people rushed into the elevator, forcing Kurt into a comer in the back, they slowly began to rise.
After a few stops, he finally reached his floor and pushed past the others to step out of the lift. Kurt walked up to reception and smiled. Nancy, the young receptionist smiled back at Kurt and held up a finger, asking him to wait a second. Kurt nodded and she answered the call.
"Hello you've reached Vogue, this is Nancy." She said into her headset.
Kurt had interned at Vogue right when he got out of high school, and soon after was given a permanent spot in the fashion department. Kurt loved his job so much and worked his ass off to get where he was today. He was now the youngest fashion designers that Vogue had ever had. At 23, Kurt is making more money then he knows what to do with and had been more places than the Neanderthals back in Lima knew were actual places. In a few more years, he wanted to make his own label and break off from Vogue, but for now, he just enjoyed what he was doing.
"Okay, well I'll see if he can schedule that appointment with you. Okay goodbye." Nancy took off her head set and turned to Kurt. "So what's up?"
"Nothing, I was just wondering if I had gotten any calls. Maybe, by a handsome, young model named Stephen." Kurt asked hopefully. Nancy smiled and checked the papers on her desk before turning back to Kurt.
"Sorry honey, but I don't see any. Maybe he's just too nervous to call the amazing Kurt Hummel." Nancy said with a smile. Kurt laughed a little then sighed.
"Not so sure about that. See you later Nan." Kurt gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before pulling up his messenger bag higher on his shoulder and walking to the fashion department, which was near the back of the huge office.
The small brunette began to ponder why Stephen didn't call him. It had been 4 days since the date and he had yet to call. Kurt had thought the date had gone very well; he had even worn one of his best outfits for the occasion. Stephen had been funny and nice, and Kurt had thought that there was a spark between them.
Kurt's job had always taken a toll on his love life. He had had three boyfriends since moving to New York and all of them had ended because of the fact that Kurt put his job first. Although he knew he shouldn't, he always did, because it was such a dream come true and he didn't want to mess it up at all.
Kurt pushed thought of boyfriends out of his head as he began to work the spring collection that would be featured the magazine in February. He let himself get lost in his work and the next time he looked up from his designs, it was 1 p.m. Before he could pack up his things to go to lunch, Nancy had come by telling him that Heather wanted to see him.
Heather was the editor-in-chief for Vogue, and the fact that she was calling Kurt to her office was either very good, or very, very bad. Kurt pushed away any bad thought as he entered her office. She motioned him to take a seat and he obeyed quickly.
"So Kurt, you're the only designer I know that I can trust with this job." Kurt let out a sigh of relief and looked shocked at her words. She smiled a little bit and went on. "So we have this new young musician and we are doing a little article on him, and I was thinking that you could put together a couple outfits for his article. Put a little bit of flare into it. Okay?"
Kurt nodded his head franticly. He couldn't believe that he had been handpicked for this! But there was just one question, "So who is this artist?"
"His name is…." She began shuffling through papers looking for the piece of paper that had the artist's name on it. "His name is…Brian or Blake or something. I'll schedule a dinner for us tonight. You, me, and him, sound okay?"
"Yes perfect. Thank you so very much." Kurt smiled at her before leaving her office.
XXX
Kurt sat down in a booth in a restaurant he had never been to. Heather had pick it out and told him to be there at 6:45 so he and her could talk before they met the musician. She wasn't there yet and it started to scare Kurt since she was never late for anything. Around 6:55, Kurt got a call from her.
"Hey Kurt, I am so sorry, and I know that this is terribly unprofessional, but I can't come to dinner. My daughter is very sick and I need to take care of her." Her voice sounded frantic and apologetic.
"Um…yeah, no problem. I'll just ask him about his style so I can work on the clothes." Kurt said awkwardly.
"That's perfect Kurt. Tell him I said I'm sorry. I have to go! Bye!" And with that, she hung up.
Kurt sighed as he checked his watch and saw it was 6:59. Any minute Brian or Blake or whatever would show up. It was then that he saw very curly black hair entering the restaurant.
No, it couldn't be HIM. No there is plenty of guys in New York with curly black hair. It was then that he noticed bright pink glasses sitting on top of that hair. Shit no! It can't be!
Whoever he was, he was talking to the waiter who was now leading him over to where Kurt was sitting. Kurt stared at his palms, which were starting to sweat, and refused to look up until he heard someone sitting down across from him. It was Blaine, his Blaine. The same Blaine that Kurt broke the heart of 6 years ago. Blaine looked exactly the same except he had become more handsome, if that was possible. Blaine wasn't looking at him; he was looking at the waiter and ordered his drink. Hearing his voice sent Kurt into a flood of memories. After the waiter left, he then turned to Kurt.
"Hello I'm-" It was that moment that they made eye contact and Blaine realized who he was talking to. His eyes widened in shock and his mouth hung open. "K- Kurt?"
"Hi Blaine." Kurt said in a shaky breath. They both just stared at each other, Blaine looking confused and Kurt feeling awkward.
XXX
It was the summer after Blaine graduated from Dalton. They had been dating for about 10 months now and everything was going better then they both thought possible. They were at Blaine's house, in Blaine's room, except it was just the two of them home since Blaine's parents went out to a movie and his brother was at a party. They were sitting on Blaine's bed and were watching one of his favorite movies of all time. When the movie ended, Kurt told Blaine that he thought that they should break up and Blaine looked like he had just been punched in the gut.
"Why? Why are you doing this?" Blaine stared at Kurt in shock and hurt. Tears started to appear in his hazel eyes. He grabbed Kurt's hands as he spoke.
"I'm doing this because you've just graduated and you have a scholarship to go to California for university. You're going to leave Westerville, you're going to leave Ohio, and you're going to leave me." Kurt told Blaine through tears that had started to escape his eyes. He stanched his hands out of Blaine's grip and looked down at the pillow he was holding.
"I won't leave! If you stay with me, I won't leave! I'll turn down the scholarship and I'll stay in Ohio! I'll wait for you! I'll get a job and save up for your future so we can leave this hell hole when you graduate. Just please, please don't leave me baby!" Blaine pleaded with Kurt, tears streaming down his face.
"I would never ask you to do that Blaine. It's your dream to go to college in California and I don't want to put your dreams on hold for me." Kurt couldn't bear to look at Blaine when he spoke because he knew that he would start to sob uncontrollably if he did.
"You're worth putting my dreams on hold for!" Blaine practically yelled as he grabbed Kurt's face and forced him to look at him. "I love you so much Kurt, so much."
"I love you too, Blaine." Kurt said resting his forehead on Blaine and looking into his eyes.
"Then why are you doing this to me?" Blaine asked in a whisper as another tear ran down his face.
"You're going to meet someone in California who can make you so much happier then I can. You're the first openly gay boy I've ever met, you're my first love, and you're my first lover. You deserve someone who has more to offer." Kurt told Blaine as more tears fell down his face.
"But I want you Kurt! I only want you. You'll always be my first and only love and you're my first lover too. I just want you, everyday for the rest of my life." Blaine told Kurt looking directly into his beautiful blue eyes.
"I love you too much to let you put your dreams on hold for me. Take the scholarship, Blaine. Go to California and become a musician like you've always wanted. I know you're going to make everyone proud, especially me. Go be happy without me weighing you down. Goodbye Blaine, I love you." And with that, Kurt kissed Blaine's cheek and grabbed his bag and walked out of Blaine's room, ignoring Blaine desperate calls for him. Kurt got into his car and got halfway to his house before he had to pull over from crying too hard.
Kurt ignored Blaine's calls, texts, and refused to answer the door when Blaine showed up, for the rest of the summer. And soon after school started back up again, the texts and calls finally stopped. He heard form David that Blaine had taken the scholarship and moved to California where he was looking into becoming a musician. Kurt smiled at the news and the thought of how successful Blaine is going to be.
Kurt went on with his life without Blaine, though he missed him desperately. He graduated and moved away from Ohio and began the successful job he had always wanted. He had not heard a word about Blaine since high school.
XXX
Now here sat his first love across from him at a restaurant in New York. Blaine looked like he was seeing a ghost. His eyes were wide in disbelief and he was looking at Kurt like he was going to disappear at any second. The awkwardness in the air felt like it was suffocating Kurt.
"Is it really you, Kurt?" Blaine asked Kurt in a deeper voice then the one he had in high school. Kurt only nodded and looked down at his glass of water. Kurt heard Blaine chuckle a bit before he spoke again. "And you work at Vogue? Figures."
Kurt looked up so see Blaine smirking at him. Kurt's breath caught in his throat as he saw the same smirk 18 year old Blaine would give him, 5 years ago. He forced himself to smile a little before speaking. "Yes I do work at Vogue. And I see that you're a musician now. I told you that you'd be brilliant."
Blaine smiled a bit before shifting in his seat uncomfortably.
"So where's this Heather lady I'm supposed to be meeting with?" Blaine asked looking around the restaurant, avoiding looking at Kurt.
"She had an emergency and couldn't make it. She send her apologizes." Kurt said while studying Blaine's features once more. He had a bit of scruff, which suited him well. His hair had grown out a couple of inches from his old hair style, when he was 18. And his shoulders seemed broader under that tight fitting shirt he was wearing. Kurt then analyzed what his ex-lover was wearing, which was a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up (Typical Blaine, Kurt thought.), a black button up vest, tight fitting jeans and a nice pair of dress shoes. Kurt had to push the thoughts of how attractive Blaine looked to the back of his mind if he was going to be able to make it through this dinner.
"Oh, that's too bad." Kurt nodded his head just as the waiter came up to take their orders. Kurt ordered the chicken salad while Blaine ordered the burger. The waiter wrote their choices down before leaving them by themselves once more. Awkwardness filled the air once more until Kurt couldn't take it, so he broke the silence.
"So how did California go?" He asked looking intently at Blaine, who fiddled with his straw before looking up at Kurt.
"It was great. Great teachers, great campus, great art programs, great everything." Blaine said, avoiding eye contact with Kurt.
"So did you find someone else?" Kurt heard himself ask before his brain could even realize what it was asking. He looked at Blaine embarrassed and wide-eyed. Blaine just looked at Kurt with a sad smile playing on his lips.
"I've dated two other boys since we broke up, Mark and Brandon. Mark I dated in my sophomore year of college, and Brandon I dated last year, however they both ended badly." Blaine said cringing and taking a sip of his drink. Kurt felt a pang of jealousy upon learning of Blaine's past love interests.
'How did they end?" Kurt shocked himself again with his rudeness. "I'm so sorry, that's rude. It's none of my business."
Blaine laughed at how Kurt stumbled over his words trying to get them out and blushed when he finished apologizing. Blaine's heart stopped when he saw Kurt blush because he looked exactly like he did when he was 17. That beautiful boy, his Kurt, was now a strikingly beautiful young adult. Blaine tried to force the thoughts of how much more beautiful Kurt had gotten (If that was even possible, Blaine thought) out of his head, but he failed miserably. He looked at the blushing, beautiful Kurt and chuckled one more time before speaking.
"No, no it's fine. Well Brandon ended the relationship last year because he thought that I spent too much time touring and not enough time with him. And the way that Mark and my relationship ended is really embarrassing." Blaine said taking another sip of his drink.
No, there is no way that you are going to tell Kurt this story. Blaine thought to himself as he chewed the end of his straw.
"You can tell me." Kurt said in a quiet voice. Blaine looked up to see those stunning blue eyes gazing into his own hazel eyes.
Before he could stop himself he said, "Okay."
Kurt smiled a little and continued to gaze at Blaine. Blaine felt like he was 18 again with Kurt using his powers of charm to get Blaine to do something Kurt wanted. Kurt would always have Blaine wrapped around his finger, willing to do anything Kurt asked for.
"So it was junior year of college and I had been dating Mark for about a year." Kurt felt the pang of jealousy spring up again for he had dated Mark longer then they had dated. Blaine coughed and then blushed before continuing the story. "One day when we were… having sex and when I…uh…came, I screamed out another boy's name."
Any of the blush that had left Kurt's face returned with a force. His cheeks burned and he felt Blaine's stare on him, willing him to say something.
"Oh," was all that Kurt could manage to say before he took a sip of his water. The unanswered question filled the silence between them. As if reading his thought, Blaine answered the question Kurt was wondering about.
"It was you, Kurt. I called out your name." Kurt's blush increased 10 times more, if that was possible. Before Kurt could say anything, the food arrived. After giving them their food and asking if everything was okay, the waiter left again.
"So what about you? Any boys in your life?" Blaine asks while taking a bite of his burger.
Kurt is pushing around the chicken in his salad. Blaine told his lovers, why doesn't Kurt just tell him about his?
"Well I've had 3 boyfriends since being in New York, Cameron, Scott, and Justin. I either had to break up with them because of my job, of they broke up with me because I was spending too much time at work and not enough time with them. The longest relationship was with Scott, and that was about 9 months." When Kurt finished telling his story, he looked up to see Blaine looking at him with some emotion Kurt couldn't quite put his finger on.
They continued most of the dinner in an awkward silence until Kurt saw a fork coming over onto his plate. He looked up to see Blaine smiled at him as he snatched a piece of chicken and ate it quickly.
"Man that's good. Why is it that you always order the best stuff and then I regret what I ordered?" Blaine smirked at him and Kurt just laughed and shrugged. He reached over the table and grabbed Blaine's burger while Blaine took another bite of Kurt's salad. And just like that, it was like they were teenagers again, when they were dating, on every date they would share their food. Kurt felt 17 again, just out on a date with his 18 year old boyfriend, but then Kurt had to remind himself that he was not 17, and Blaine was most definitely not his boyfriend.
The rest of the evening went by with light conversation and food sharing. When it came down to the bill, they fought over it lightheartedly.
"No really Kurt, I've got it." Blaine said pulling out his wallet.
"No Blaine, this was a business dinner and I'm going to pay for it." Kurt said placing money on the table. But soon, a hand reached over and grabbed Kurt's hand. Kurt looked up to see Blaine smiling down at him as he placed the money that Kurt had gotten out back in his hand. Kurt allowed himself to bask in the memories of how many times those warm, calloused hands had grabbed his hand or his face or….other places.
"This didn't seem like a business dinner now did it? I'm paying for this date." Kurt was stunned into silence when the word "date" slipped out of his ex-lover's beautiful lips. Blaine just smirked and handed the waiter his money. Blaine slid out of the booth and put on his black coat and Kurt followed Blaine's actions a moment later.
They exited the restaurant and started walking up the street so they could hail a taxi. Kurt looked up at Blaine after walking in silence for a bit. Blaine was staring down at Kurt and Kurt knew that Blaine had something to say. As if on cue, Blaine opened his mouth and spoke.
"You broke my heart you know that?" Kurt stopped walking and stared up at the curly haired boy. Blaine had stopped walking too and was looking at Kurt with an anguish written on all of his features.
"I -" Kurt was cut off before he could even form a sentence.
"I know you were trying to do what you thought was best, but I loved you Kurt. But when you ignored by calls and my texts and even that time I showed up at your house and you wouldn't come out to see me, and that hurt Kurt! That hurt so much." Blaine let everything that he had bottled up for years come spilling out.
"Why? Why wouldn't you even answer my calls?" Blaine asked in a whisper, tears starting to form in his eyes.
Kurt took a deep breath before starting to speak. "I did it because…I knew that if I saw you, or even heard your voice, I'd go running back into your arms."
Blaine looked shocked and then anger returned to his features. "You could have done something Kurt! You could have written me a fucking letter for Christ's sake!"
Kurt was taken aback at Blaine's anger and his language. He had absolutely no idea what to do so he just started rambling.
"Blaine, I am really, really sorry. I was just young and stupid and I know I should have contacted you but I was just so scared. And I'm just so, so very sorry." Kurt rushed the words out because he could feel the tears starting to leak from his eyes. Blaine just sighed and caught a tear that had begun to run down Kurt's cheek with his thumb.
"You know you're still my first and only love." Kurt gasped and looked up at Blaine in shock. Blaine still had his hand on Kurt's face, thumb rubbing small circles on his cheek. Before Kurt could say anything, Blaine grabbed his hand and hailed down a taxi. They both got in and Blaine told Kurt to give his directions first. It turned out that Blaine's apartment was only a couple blocks away from his own apartment. Kurt sat in the back of the cab with Blaine trying to digest everything that had happened that night and it seemed like Blaine was doing the same thing. It wasn't long before they had reached their destination. Blaine paid the cab driver, much to Kurt's protest as he had paid for dinner too, but Blaine wouldn't hear any of it. They stepped outside into the chilly night's air as the taxi drove away. They both stood awkwardly in front of Kurt's building
"So…I should…I should go." Blaine told Kurt with his hands in the pockets of his coat. He was looking at the ground, shifting uncomfortably from foot-to-foot.
"Yes…well, I take it you'll be coming into the office tomorrow for the article." Kurt asked, looking at Blaine. Blaine looked up into those crystal blue eyes and nodded a little bit before looking at the ground again. "Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow."
Blaine nodded again before he looked up again. With a slight smile he said, "Goodbye Kurt, see you tomorrow." And started walking down the street.
Kurt sighed as he opened the door to the building and getting into the elevator to take him up to his apartment. He went through his nightly routine in a daze, his head filled with thoughts of Blaine and old memories. He got into bed even though he knew that he wouldn't be able to sleep that well. The last thought that filled his head before going to sleep was Blaine.