Trust can be a fickle thing.
It can bring about just as much misfortune as it can prosperity.
He had always thought himself a rather good judge of character, had placed his absolute trust in the wonderful woman he had once upon a time been deeply honored to call his wife, only to come unheralded home for once to be unceremoniously confronted with the calamitous consequences of his gullibility. He was forced to bear witness to the disastrous damage in mind, body and soul his misplaced trust in the unrepentant woman, which he had nearly two decades ago vowed eternal love to, had done to his only child.
Some mistakes can be forgiven, some guilt can be redeemed. But this time, he saw no solution. There was simply no way for him to deserve his daughter's forgiveness.
Not after this.
And still … despite everything, it was exactly this one miracle which she had granted him.
He truly had an absolutely amazing daughter.
Incredibly amazing.
Sawada Iemitsu stared silently at the empty doorway of his daughter's new room in the Vongola Main Mansion while his rough hands were gently caressing his baby girl's messy honey-blond hair, fingers playing thoughtfully with the soft loose curls.
Her malnourished body was tightly entwined with his tall still form, allowing the shivering child to seek the so long denied comfort and safety even unconscious as she was, her head resting relaxed, eyes gently closed, against his broad chest. Bandages and Band-Aids' still sporadically littered his daughter's frail body, even after the Sun on duty had healed her as much as her body, unused to the potency of flames as it was, could assimilate without collapsing in itself. Her steady breath brushed softly over his exposed collar bone.
It was peaceful, and under any other circumstances, he would have loved it.
But today, knowing why this exhaustion had overwhelmed her?
He hated it.
Hated the undeniable proof of her undeserved pain and suffering. Hated the miserable tremble capturing her body and the barely concealed flinch whenever he moved to touch her.
… as if she expected him to hit her … his own child was bloody afraid of him …
He absolutely loathed knowing that those slowly healing wounds run so much deeper than mere lacerations and discolorations. In the end, he had truly failed the single most important person in his entire world.
It was unforgivable.
At night, lost possibilities tortured him. Passed-by alternatives, a simple change, a visit more, a visit earlier. Anything. If only he had ...
But if only … well, in the convincing imitation of perdition so often called real life, there was no place for vague 'If only'. That fact, Iemitsu was sadly intimately aware of.
In his line of job, he had to be.
As CEDEF Head and External Adviser to Timoteo di Vongola, the Ninth Don of the strongest Famiglia in the Italian Underworld, also known as Vongola, Sawada Iemitsu was much, but a stranger to deadly and senseless arguments between family members, no matter how close they should be to each other, did not count among them. He had stopped keeping track of how often fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins and great-parents alike killed each other out of worthless greed, pride, wrath or gluttony. Family was even in a world that prided itself on Famiglia often to be enjoyed with caution, as sad as that was.
But even after all this time, seeing a child mistreated, while not the norm and heavily punished when discovered, was sadly not an as unfamiliar concept as he would have liked it to be. He still felt ill remembering the inhumane torturous experiments the Estraneo had done on their own children ...
That terrible knowledge helped him now in no way, because this didn't concern some nameless child he had no relation to.
This concerned his own flesh and blood, his beloved daughter.
His baby girl.
And never before had he felt such a deep sense of self-loathing. He had stupidly trusted the wrong person, had allowed the placating love and soothing words of his seemingly air-headed wife to delude him into a sense of fabricated peace and security, a perfect little lie of a perfect little home created skillfully by honeyed words and calculated secrets.
He felt sick.
A small part of him had … felt the wrongness; even before he had left for the first time, he had subconsciously suspected that she was hiding something from him. But he hadn't wanted to think like that about her, to regard this loving woman as anything else but his treasured and beloved wife …
Mio dio, he had blindly believed her to be a lovely little darling, obvious and naïve, not a psychotic possessive bitch …
How wrong he had been. How gullible. And this freaking gullible approach she had practically handed him as an excuse and which he had accepted where it actually should have mattered more than anything to keep a clear head, had ultimately condemned his only child to a life that made the little girl question everything.
Her father's love. The reason she existed. Hope for a better tomorrow. For a tomorrow at all.
It was heartbreaking.
Sawada Iemitsu had indeed known guilt. He had known shame.
But never before had he known this.
Helplessness.
Releasing a troubled sigh, he closed his eyes and burrowed his face in Tsuna's hair, inhaling deeply the strong sweet scent of lavender and roses'.
How had everything gone so terribly wrong?
Their beginning had been like a fairy-tale. Magical. Perfect.
Love at first sight.
Iemitsu himself had been twenty-four and on his first holiday since he had taken over the stressful job as adviser to his distant cousin and embraced the criminal blood flowing through his veins. He had decided to visit his hometown, a sleepy little thing called Namimori, to finally relax and just let go of the headache leading an important department of a centuries-old Mafia Famiglia could bring. It had been on his second day re-acquainting himself with Namimori that he had met Yamata Nana, a sweet nineteen year old waitress who wore the loveliest kindest smile he had ever seen, and with one unexpected look into her beautiful gentle brown eyes, he had fallen head over heels in love with the delicate Japanese beauty.
Even his sky flames had been euphoric, nearly drunken in their ecstasy as they danced just beneath his skin, trying to reach out and play with Nana's own inactivated flames. In that very moment, he had known with startling clarity that this was the woman who would become his wife, and the unchallenged mother of his future children.
Iemitsu hadn't thought twice and immediately asked her out, to which she had readily and with a smile agreed, a tinkling laugh in her sweet voice. After this day, they started to spend more and more time together, either in the privacy of their apartments getting to know each other or on public dates which Iemitsu was delighted to plan out and make happen, the more extravagant and over the top the better; he had only so much time to impress and win her over. Italy would soon call, but he couldn't leave without knowing her to be his. It wasn't until two months later that Iemitsu finally theatrically proposed on a bent knee, getting an excited kiss as response and married her just a month later on their three month anniversary.
He was completely besotted.
Seeing Nana gliding down the aisle in her elegant white wedding dress, the snug silk fabric clinging enticingly to her every curve, the lace trail flowing behind her over the floor and her beautiful long brown hair skillfully pinned up with dozens of tiny white lily pins had been a mesmerizing picture forever burned into his mind. He had never seen anything so breathtaking.
It had felt like his heart had stopped in stunned reverence.
Until this day, he couldn't even remember saying yes, all he could see when he looked back were her happily sparkling eyes as his lips touched hers and his whole world exploded in a shower of fireworks.
Their wedding night and subsequent honeymoon … had been a dream ripe with satisfied excitement and life-altering consequences.
They had been young, newly married and on cloud nine.
And then, it had happened.
Two months after their first night as married couple, Nana's menstruation was definitely and undeniable late.
The store-bought different pregnancy tests, all ten of them, showed a little pink plus.
... Iemitsu, though feeling faint, couldn't have been anymore shocked or any happier than at this very moment.
Even the moment Nana had agreed to marry him paled in comparison.
For a ruthless man who hadn't even expected to ever find love, to be not only gifted with a wonderful woman to call his wife but also with a darling child to call his own, may have been in his profession not unheard of, but still it was rather rare. And that with good reason. It was dangerous. To have a family meant to have a weakness, a vulnerability that could so easily spell ones doom. A sliver of familiar-becoming doubt, of warning and caution always laid nestled in his mind, like a gloomy shadow dimming his exorbitance, but he didn't allow it to taint what truly mattered.
His newly-forming family.
As compelling as giving into the fear and running away or terminating the pregnancy was, he was ultimately a selfish man. He wanted this child, and he wanted his wife.
And he would not live without either. He just would have to be even more careful.
It was an unmovable fact that as Mafioso he had enemies, quiet a lot of them in fact due to his station. It would be more sensible to leave and allow his new family to live in peace, to disappear and not linger; lingering had felt like tempting fate. But even while his rational side knew the course he should follow he was completely unwilling and incapable of actually leaving his lovely Nana and their little peach behind while they were in such a delicately vulnerable state. He could not bear risking either of them.
The hectic seven, nearly eight, months following the brilliant discovery of their new approaching family member consisted of a ridiculously happy if acutely overenthusiastic and overbearing Iemitsu and an increasingly grumpy and tremendously irritated Nana.
Looking back now, he realized with a sinking feeling that she had even then been more concerned with the attention the pregnancy yielded her than with their child itself. He remembered dozens of incidents in which he had scolded her for her careless behavior, for endangering their child, during which she had distracted him with her smile or pout or honeyed words that derailed his thoughts; and always, he had only become more attentive to her desires in a bid to protect the little one.
… had she ever cared for their child?
Had their baby ever meant anything to her?
Iemitsu's grip tightened as he remembered her more dangerous bouts of carelessness.
Had it been deliberate?
Had her abuse and neglect begun before their daughter had even been born?
… what kind of mother …?
He closed his eyes as he thought back to the labor, how deeply she had cursed their child. Not one word against him had left her lips, no, she blamed the one being that could nothing for the pain.
Even then, she had blamed their unborn child.
… it should have warned him ….
" She is so beautiful …"
" Mhm. What do you want to name her, Anata?"
" Oh, you should name her, love. You labored so hard for her to see this world!"
" Really, you should do it."
" Tsunahime. Please let me call her Tsunahime. She is the beautiful little princess that binds us together."
" That is … sweet."
The first time he had held her, he knew true love.
This tiny fragile being was his daughter, his flesh and blood. She was the most precious little girl he had ever seen, not that he had any significant experience with children. And he knew, in the very moment he laid his eyes upon her for the first time, that she would always be his single most important top priority, his deepest and truest reason to fight back against anything life and his job could throw at him and come back alive. For her, he would triumph over heaven and hell and succeed against god and the devil themselves. She would be his everything, and he was so incredible humbled and honored to be allowed to be a part of her life that no words could have described the incredible feeling blooming in his chest, a feeling that never left and only grew stronger.
It was easy to die for her. It would be more difficult to live.
But for his baby girl, he would do everything.
He had been the first one to hold, the first one to kiss and the first one to love her. This frail delicate little babe that had been laid so carefully in his arms had captured his heart so entirely that he was lost the moment his mind registered that she was his.
His child.
Iemitsu had needed moments to even register the knowledge, and his knees had gone weak with the realization that he had helped create this little piece of perfection. That his blood, too, flowed through her veins and made her his family. She didn't open her eyes, she didn't cry. Only small puffs of breath escaped her pink lips as he gently stroked along her tiny chubby cheek. And his heart sung in harmony as his daughter's tiny newborn orange-colored flames reached out and entwined with his own, the deep love and welcoming he felt resonating along their bond as her so beautifully pure flames latched onto his and held onto them trustingly.
Only minutes alive, and she knew that he was there. That she was his and he hers.
Tears had rolled down his cheeks.
… Nana had simply laid there, making no move to take her child, not even when he tried to give their daughter to her, claiming exhaustion. He had gullible bought the explanation, but now … she hadn't wanted to hold their child, and she had not even wanted to name her.
Had she truly never felt anything but contempt for their baby girl? Jealousy?
Was the woman he had fallen in love with a lie?
… everything he had thought to have known about her had turned out to be twisted. As bitter as it sounded, nothing could surprise him anymore.
And still, a part of him couldn't help but blame himself. Maybe if he hadn't left, if he had insisted on staying longer, on supporting her more …
Maybe he could have prevented …
Maybe he could have seen …
Their first argument resonated like the sound of drums in his ears ...
" Why?! Why do you want to leave?!"
" Nana, you have to understand dear, I don't want to leave you but my job …"
" And me? What is with me? And your child? Don't we matter at all?!"
" Don't be thick! I'm doing this for us, so that we can live a comfortable life. Besides that, you knew what you got into when you married me. I was upfront about it. You knew from the beginning that I would be away a lot, I never lied to you! I have responsibilities-!"
" To us! You have a duty to us! Yes, I knew you would be away for some time, but you can't just leave me alone with a newborn! I can't raise your child on my own!"
" I'm sorry, Nana, I really am, but my flight is booked and I have to go."
" … damn it, Iemitsu … please, just … just come back to me."
" I promise, love. I will come back to my girls. Take care of our little girl."
Iemitsu's lips were pressed into a thin white line.
Looking back, he could see it clear as day. It had always been about her. Only her. She had used Tsuna as emotional blackmail when she wanted to get her way with him, but her first words always involved her own desires and demands. He should have seen. He should have listened.
His leaving may have had a part in her reaction, but the hate, the selfishness, those ugly feelings had always been there. She had not been ready for marriage or parenthood, and he had been an absolute irresponsible idiot for believing differently.
Nana had been too young to understand one very important fact: Children couldn't help being born, and they couldn't choose their parents. This responsibility laid with their mother and father.
Iemitsu had taken the easy, not the right route. He had chosen the most likely path to ensure their safety and happiness; leaving and sparse contact. But the easy route came back and bite him in the ass.
It had damned his baby girl. From the very beginning, she had no chance and no choice.
Over the years, he had been sent the lonely picture of Tsuna by Nana, had talked with his wife over the secure line of their phone, but seldom if ever had he talked with his child, and when he had, her quiet voice and reluctant demeanor had easily been written off as part of her shyness, a shyness that Nana had always insisted she exhibited in enormous quantities.
… and once he had a sufficient explanation, he had accepted it.
It had been his wife who had told him. Why ever would he suspect her of lying?
… just one more nail in his already sealed coffin.
He really deserved the worst father of the year reward – for sixteen consecutive years. What an achievement ...
What kind of man …
What kind of father …
If only he hadn't listened to that woman.
If only …
" Tsuna? Oh, she is well. Terrible shy, that girl, but well."
" Damn. I wanted to talk to my darling little princess."
" She wouldn't have talked anyway."
" What?! Why?! Daddy wants to talk to his sweet darling!"
" She has a horrible lisp at the moment, Anata, both her front milk teeth came loose at the same time. She doesn't want to talk at all, and that is her decision. Don't pester the child."
" … but my Tsu-chan …"
" Dear, just tell me how you are doing, I miss you so much and want to know that you are well."
He bit his lips to swallow down the growl clawing up his throat.
How many times had she lied?
How many times had he been purposefully denied his child?
How many times had his baby girl cried herself to sleep while he had been fended off with platitudes, swallowing them gullible and allowing his baby's suffering to continue?
Had anything been true?
What kind of lies did Nana tell their baby?
What kind of pain had his little girl been through?
How many times had Nana blamed her for things Tsuna couldn't even comprehend at her age, accusations she had no fault in but was an easy scapegoat for?
… he felt nauseous just thinking of the abusive spiteful words that bitch could have dished out in her self-righteous hate ….
" She's out at the moment."
" Playing with friends."
" In the park."
" Doing homework in the library."
Lies.
Always lies.
He had never been told anything but lies.
" Don't tell Tsuna, Anata, but I'm a bit worried for her. She's failing in school and her teachers' complain all the time. It's just horrible, really. I'm at my wits end with that girl."
" Another detention. I don't know what to do anymore."
" If she would only behave! Why do others have so much luck and our dear has to be so difficult? I'm blaming your adventurous genes, Anata, just so you know."
" She can be such a taxing child."
He deeply doubted that even one word had been true.
Maybe she had gotten detentions, maybe her teachers complained … but the Tsuna he had known back then and gotten to know now even better, was different than that. Maybe she was a bit difficult, and he was sure that most if not all children had their taxing phases, but she would have never deliberately caused her mother grief.
Even now, even after all the pain and suffering, she didn't voice her grievances against the cursed woman.
… maybe it would come … hopefully …
Iemitsu didn't have the same restraint.
Just thinking of Nana's favorite line made him spitfire-mad.
" I miss you, dear. I want to see you."
Attention-seeking whore.
At the time, he had been so deliriously happy to hear those words, to know that despite his absence he would always have a loving home to come back to. Now, the mere memory was sickening.
Where was the mention of their daughter?
Where was the 'we'?
First Nana denied them contact, and then she omitted Tsuna totally?
Fuck, he had been so gullible, it was actually piteous. And no matter how understanding or forgiving his daughter was, he would never forgive himself, and forever try to make amends. A child should never live in fear, and they should never fear their own parent.
Iemitsu had tried to come home as often as he could, but sadly, that didn't amount to much. Twice a year for a week or two was all he could do, and it wasn't even rudimentary enough. He had only managed to hold this delicate balance between work and family until Tsuna had turned twelve, after that he hadn't seen his pretty princess for nearly four years, the threat from Enemy Famiglias, the dangers of other, more old-fashioned, Vongola Members finding out and using his child as leverage or breeding stock for Tsuna's esteemed bloodline and the crisis of Xanxus Cradle Affair made him more than paranoid; all he wanted was to protect his baby, and if he had to cut all but monetary contact with them to achieve that, then so be it.
He would gladly become the devil to preserve her place in heaven for dozens or more of happy years on earth for her to come.
Remembering back to his visits over the years, he felt rage well up – rage at himself and the bitch. Oh, he had tried to spent as much time as possible with his daughter, but she had always seemed so shy, so distant, hiding in her room or going out. It had progressed so far that he had even believed her to hate him, to be angry at him for being home so seldom and avoiding him. It had been a deep blow, but naturally, Nana had been there to distract him.
A small self-deprecating smile flickered over his lips. Psychotic bitch she was, but she had always known how to sooth his worries away and divert his attention.
He would never forgive himself for falling to that act.
Because in retrospect, the pale fragile thing, nearly mute and so painfully shy and flinching that his heart throbbed in pain, could have been nothing else but the product of continuous abuse.
And he had played right into the spider's web.
Misplaced trust, indeed.
His eyes burned as he kissed Tsuna's hair, the tips of his fingers splayed along her pale cheek as she made a small sound in her sleep and grabbed his shirt tighter.
How could Nana …?
To their own child …?
" Come, Anata, I made your favorite dishes. And the sake is already warm."
" it is your favorite movie. I thought we would have a romantic evening, just the two of us."
" Let's play, my husband, I'm all ready for you. I have been waiting for so long."
" Love me, Anata. Love me like only you can do."
" Don't leave me just yet, yes?"
He should have seen her for what she was.
He should have acted years ago, should have listened to his intuition.
But it had taken Yamamoto Tsuyoshi, his former partner and retired Mafioso, sharing his unease about Nana's behavior when he wasn't home to reluctantly make all of Iemitsu's internal sirens blare at once, even those he had buried beneath years of complacency.
One call, one warning ...
" Iemitsu, I think you need to return home."
" Tsuyoshi, you know I can't just -"
" You need to. I know that you have responsibilities, and that your work is demanding – I'm one of the few who really know, old friend, but for your daughter, you need to come back. I don't know what exactly is going on in your house, but I have seen signs. Signs that paint an awful picture neither you nor I can ignore any longer. Either you come back and take care of this or I need to involve the authorities. Take a plane, don't call your wife, and observe. For your child."
" … I will. Thanks for looking out for my baby, my friend."
" Anytime."
And he had done as his old friend had suggested.
He had expected it to be for naught.
Nothing … nothing could have prepared him for the truth.
… one final visit.
And his life descended into hell.
" Iemitsu, Anata, what are you doing here?"
" … Nana, what …?"
" Anata? Whatever is the matter? Oh, do you mean … that? Don't worry, I'm just teaching the girl."
" Teaching …?"
" She's so useless. Really, good for nothing, that little brat. It's only a little punishment for being mouthy. Can you imagine that she actually called me her mother? Me? As if I want to be reminded that I birthed something like that! Such a shame she-"
" Shut your trap."
" A-anata …?"
" Don't come near, you fucking bitch. Everything – everything you told me, it was lies! Is that your idea of taking care of our child, of my princess?!"
" You princess! Again! It's always your fucking princess – I'm your wife! I should come first! Not that worthless mistake!"
" My daughter is not a mistake. The only mistake I made was trusting you with her."
" W-what are you doing? Anata? Iemitsu? Wha-?"
" I'm taking my child home."
" You can't! I'm your wife! You love me! Me!"
" … I love my child. I don't even know who you are anymore ..."
" … Nana … expect the divorce papers."
Part of him still grieved the woman he had loved for seventeen years.
But all in all, he felt surprisingly minor emotional pain.
Because as deeply as he had loved Nana, and as much as he would have liked to deny it, his love first and foremost belonged to his daughter, to this incredible little being he had held in his arms sixteen years ago as she took her first breath. There wasn't even a decision to make; the moment she was born, she had become all that mattered to him.
Nana never stood a chance when the choice was between her and their daughter.
It were only the shattered remains of feelings he still held for her that stayed his hands as he came into their home, as he crossed the threshold into his own personal hell and watched everything he had believed to know become undone as lies.
Seeing his daughter cowering on the floor, scratches and bruises covering her form as her own mother lashed Tsuna's back to shreds – he had never felt such a rage. He had thrown the obviously drunken woman brutally to the ground and taken his child, the only thought in his mind to make sure she would be alright, that she would recover, that she was still there ...
The idea to lose her …
He had nearly been physically sick then and there.
Later, he had been sick.
Holding his child, the girl bleeding all over and unconscious, while being soaked through with her blood and his heartbeat rushing in his ears as he saw how she struggled to breathe, he still tried.
He tried to understand.
But all Nana did was kill whatever could have remained of their love.
Iemitsu left, taking his daughter with him and leaving the ruins of seventeen years of love behind with the last promise he would ever give that bitch.
Divorce.
He had done it immediately. One threat to expose her abuse to the authorities, and he was not only a single man again but also a single father with complete undisputed custody of his beloved daughter.
It had hurt.
But he didn't regret it.
He regretted many things, but not saving his child.
Tsuna had a chance. She finally had a chance.
Her recovery would be long, and its start was as promising as it was wretched.
" Tou-chan? … missed you."
" I missed you, too, my little princess."
" Kaa-chan?"
" Will never hurt you again."
" … it wasn't so bad."
" Your arms and back tell a vastly different tale."
" … I'm tired."
It had been difficult.
It still was difficult.
Tsuna had not really understood just how much her mother had fucked her up, and though she loved him and understood well enough that he loved her too, there had been a barrier there. His child had to fend for herself for as long as she was alive, and parental input translated for her into hateful words, kicks and slaps. She physically flinched away from him. Her features white and tight in fear.
He felt like the lowest of scums.
She was afraid.
And not only that … his baby girl was afraid of him.
More than once, Basil, Lal, Turmeric and Oregano had to restrain him from actually chartering a plane and flying to Namimori. The urge to strangle that wretched woman had been overwhelming. But his subordinated were right. He was needed here …
Tsuna needed him more than he needed revenge.
The desire still burned in his veins, but watching Tsuna blossom into someone who still was so deeply capable of love even in the few weeks she had been here, even as restrained as she was by her physical weakness, he wouldn't change it for the chance at vengeance. It was clear as day that she loved what little she had seen of Italy, and she obviously delighted in learning all she could while her body was too fragile to move. Her physical healing was slow, and not just because they had to switch between flame and mundane healing. Oh no, while most of the time did she did indeed do what was asked of her, she could be just as stubborn as her old man when something didn't agree with her. And dio mio, Iemitsu knew that he was damn stubborn.
It felt him with equal amounts of pride and exasperation.
Her fragile state improved slowly but steadily, and while the Sun had healed her as best as he could and she was out of immediate danger, Iemitsu nevertheless needed to hold her, needed to know that the delicate little thing wouldn't slip away between his fingers into a layer of reality he couldn't save her from. He desperately needed to feel her skin beneath his fingers, hear her breath and the beating of her heart …
Malnourished, sick, hurt.
His child was nearly broken. Maybe, on a level he couldn't really grasp, she was broken.
He had seen the deliberate wounds on her arms, had heard the soft curse of the distraught Sun and felt his heart shatter into thousands of pieces as he understood where the perfectly symmetrical lines on the inside of her forearm came from.
How deeply her soul had to be hurt for her to do that ...
How could he even dare to think himself worthy of her beautiful presence?
" Don't be foolish, Tou-chan. You were the only one who ever loved me. I could never not love you."
" I still don't deserve your forgiveness."
" Idiotic father. It's mine to give, not yours to take. And even though I'm sure I will be often bitchy with you and pretty difficult once you become overbearing, something that's just written in your face, Tou-chan, it is really my decision to forgive you. And I do."
He was unworthy.
Utterly unworthy.
Of her love.
Of her forgiveness.
Of everything she was gifting him with.
But, naturally, she was his daughter. And as such, she didn't give a flying fuck for his miserable opinions on his own worth, or lack thereof – no matter how deeply Nana had wounded her, the Vongola Blood held true and a Vongola Princess always got what she wanted.
And if she wanted her father to stop mopping around, well ...
" Promise!"
" Tsu-chan …"
" I did not ask you! Promise me, Tou-chan … or I will cry."
" I promise to never leave you again. To always love you, never let any witch come between us and lead you down the aisle on your wedding day. And to do my best to return to you."
" … good Tou-chan."
He was torn between tears of history and barking laughter at being treated like a dog.
… really, threatening him with tears … and he, like the sucker he was, carved immediately …
In the end, he had settled on blinking away his own tears and smiling softly.
Those moments, as few and far as they were, gave him hope.
It had been three weeks since he had taken her, three weeks that she was finally where she belonged – with him. And still she managed to shock him, not just with every new act of depravity her, as he had shockingly found out, alcoholic mother had been capable of unveiled, but even more with her amazingly gentle and insightful soul.
Sixteen years of suffering, of an abusive mother and gullible father, and still she retained her brilliance, the radiance and gentleness of her soul, no matter how shattered she was.
He was so terrible proud of her, it stole his breath and made his heart flutter in relief.
No one would ever take her from him and hurt her.
Never again.
Iemitsu kissed his child's forehead carefully as she curled even more snugly around him, her lovely face completely hidden in his chest.
Her recovery was slow-going, and he knew that she would explode more than once when she finally managed to shake of the shock that still clung to her. He didn't believe for one moment that she would stay as docile as she was now, but that was okay. He would actually welcome it.
She would need to get it out of her system.
And he would be there – as support and punching bag.
The first would be his privilege, the second his punishment.
It was less than he deserved, considering the second.
Just this once, he wanted to remain in the now. The long road ahead could wait for tomorrow.
Suddenly, he looked up sharply as a dark figure emerged and leaned into the door frame.
… why did he of all people just had to appear today?
Iemitsu nearly moaned in aggravation.
Calculating dark eyes took in the homely scene before them as sharp pale featured remained blank. Black suit as immaculate as always, the dress shirt beneath orange-colored and a stylish black tie to round it up, Reborn the former Sun Arcobaleno and the Greatest Hitman in the World seemed just as dangerous as always. His animal companion, Leon the Chameleon, sat lazily on top of Reborn's customary black Fedora, and Iemitsu had to acknowledge that the other was indeed the embodiment of Mafia Classic.
He tried to school his features into a neutral mask, but the stress of the last few weeks had taken its toll, and he knew that his face was more a grimace than anything else.
He just didn't have the strength for a verbal sparring with the acerbic Arcobaleno.
" Come to gloat?", he asked wearily.
The other didn't move.
" I don't need to, do I?", was the rhetoric reply.
Iemitsu shock his head defeated.
" No, you don't."
Even to his own ears, he sounded piteously pathetic.
" I failed. How could I fail her like this?"
He didn't expect an answer, and he got none.
The other man had more than made his opinion of Iemitsu known; his apparent incompetence at not only managing the CEDEF but his own family being the most exploited topics. And this time, Iemitsu could neither deny the silent accusations … nor did he want to.
He deserved every bit of ridicule and damnation Reborn decided to bestow upon him.
There was no atonement for his sins.
" Have you learned your lessons?"
He snorted.
He had. He had learned more than he ever wanted to.
Life was a hard task master, and a cruel bitch to boot.
" You can't change the past", the hitman continued ruthlessly. " But you can change the future."
Iemitsu stared at the man as Reborn turned around, obviously intend on leaving father and daughter alone after having said his piece.
And what kind of piece.
But … as strange as it sounded, the fact that Reborn, who believed Iemitsu to be the epitome of human stupidity, told him that he could shape the future, that he could in fact salvage his child's future and their strained relationship … it gave him fresh hope.
He looked down at his sleeping child and was filled with new determination.
No matter what life would throw at them, no matter how they may argue or clash, she was his child and he would see to it that her life would be long and happy. He would ensure it.
She would be happy.
" I'm not saying this for you. I'm saying it for her."
Startled, Iemitsu looked up and was caught off-guard by those intense dark eyes.
" Don't fuck this up again, idiota. You have been given an incredible gift."
Speechless, he watched as Reborn swept away, his eyes fixed stupefied on the spot the hitman had been mere moments ago.
Slowly, he looked down at his beautiful delicate little girl, and a smile crept upon his face. Gently stroking a few stray strands from her face, he gave her another kiss on the forehead and closed his eyes.
She was his life, the reason he fought day for day to come back home.
And he would ensure that she always had a welcoming home.
His eyes opened, burning orange with a determination he had felt only once before, the day he had held his only child for the first time.
Nothing and no one would ever dare to harm his child.
He would tear them apart before that.
She was indeed an incredible gift.
~ The End. Companion to 'Blame'.~