Things spiraled out of control one night, not long after Ali's return to Rosewood. I normally would've blamed myself for what happened, but it felt right.
I was sleeping over at Alison's, she said she was feeling lonely and needed someone to be with her. I stayed. I missed Alison, and now that she was back, it felt like a dream. Sometimes I was afraid I'd wake up from it and she'll be gone again. The day before she'd told me that what we shared before wasn't one sided... That she had feelings for me too. I tried to seem calm, but my head was spinning, millions of thoughts racing through my mind. I wanted to kiss her so badly in that moment, but I reminded myself that this girl broke my heart in a way I didn't think possible, and she didn't even seem to care... At least not as much as I did.
As I was getting ready for bed, I tried my best to fight the feelings that were coming back to haunt me; I kept repeating in my head Don't do this to yourself. I went under the covers and turned over to Alison. I breathed in the sweet smell of her perfume and I felt a black hole opening up inside me. I tried closing my eyes, but they didn't obey me. For so long I had tried to bring her into my dreams, only to have the illusion of being close to her again. And now, she was so close to me. So I stopped thinking, and asked her if she was awake. At first she didn't answer and I felt sad, but I thought maybe it was for the better... But right as I was about to give up, she turned around and her blue eyes were looking straight into mine. My heart started beating so fast, I was afraid she could almost hear it thumping in my chest. And again, without thinking, I leaned in towards her, and I kissed her. She kissed me back. In that moment I felt so happy I could cry. We fell asleep into each other's arms and for a moment I felt that everything might be okay, that the torture I'd lived through the past couple years had come to an end.