Oh. My. God. My head hurts. It's all dark.
I hurt in places I didn't know ucould/u hurt. I manage a small groan.
"You're awake!" Hisoka's relieved voice reaches me, even if I can't see him. Relieved? What reason did he have to be relieved?
"I can't see." Great, blurt out the first thing that pops into my brain. Good going, Tsuzuki.
"Aa, there are bandages around your eyes to let them heal of the soot and ashes that got in there from the fire." Huh? What's this?
"Hisoka, what fire?" I might not be an empath, but I caught him off-guard enough to feel a bit of that surprise and concern he's feeling.
"You don't remember?" His voice is shaky. I wonder why...
I can tell I'm just giving off waves of confusion. My once thick mental shields are shattered.
I have no idea why.
I hear the door squeak open. "I'm just going to get Tatsumi and Watari, okay?" And then he's gone.
I'm left horribly confused. All I remember is trying to protect that girl...the one who blamed me for her friend's death.
But for some reason...I don't regret it at all.
I remember all my past sins, but I don't feel guilty.
I don't know what happened, but it seems like there is a thick scab over the guilt.
Must scratch it off.
Must try to remember.
Need to feel guilty need to feel worthless need to continue my penance scratch off the scab make the wound bleed once again-
Strong arms are pinning me to the bed. "Tsuzuki! Calm down!" Watari's urgent voice. Why is he urgent? He's usually his hyper version of calm. (Oxymoron, I know, but it's true.)
I struggle against the warm hands. "Who...? Whoever you are, let me go!"
"Will you stop scratching and hurting yourself?"
Tatsumi.
"I was hurting myself...?" At least now I can despise myself again. I'm hating how weak and raspy my voice sounds.
"Can you sit up?" Watari, WHY are you asking me this while you're helping me up?
"Apparantly I can." uARRRRRRG/u! I hate the way I sound!
I guess somebody else agrees with me because I now have a Stryofoam cup next to my lips. "Here." Hisoka's voice is gentle. Was he worried?
He tips the cup, and sweet, cold water runs into my mouth and down my throat. "Sank'yuu, Hisoka," I say when I've finished the water.
"You sound much better." He sounds like he's smiling. Hisoka? Smiling on my behalf?
"When can I get these bandages off? I'd really like to see." It's discomforting not seeing anything but darkness. And I want to ask about the fire when I can see their reactions, dammit.
After a pause, Watari said, "Well, it has been three weeks, so we should try. What do you think, Tatsumi?"
I suppose Tatsumi nodded because gentle hands started unwrapping the bandages from around my head. The first thing I saw was a pair of bespecticled cheerful orange eyes."Saa, Tsuzuki, how do you feel?"
uOW./u Just dandy, except for the burning pain in my eyes. I blinked, focusing my eyes better.
There was a sharp intake of breath from the other three occupants in the room. "What?" I blink again, focusing on the green-eyed Shinigami.
Who is staring at me in...
confusion and fear?
"Your eyes..." Tatsumi whispers, his own blue eyes wide, "Your eyes aren't purple anymore...they're red!"
...Oh, hey, look. Even 003 is staring. "Can I have a mirror?"
Hisoka silently handed me a hand-held mirror that was lying on the bedside table.
I shakily graps the handle and hold it up to my face.
Tatsumi was right. My eyes were no longer the color of amethysts...
They were the color of garnets.
The last thing I heard before I passed out was the mirror's glass breaking on the floor.
*~*~*
i"You have demon blood in you." The silver-eyed man reached out and touched my cheek."
"No human has those color eyes."
*FLASH*
"Your eyes....your eyes are red!"
*FLASH*
"You monster!"
"You killed all those people!"
*FLASH*
Child sobbing. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..."
*FLASH*
"Two gentlemen dead in a bed of roses."
*FLASH*
"I will never forgive you!"
*FLASH*
"Don't act like I don't know what you're up to, vampire!"/i
I wake up in a cold sweat, breathing hard.
I see a figure in the corner.
My garnet eyes widen.
"Oh, no..."
Thin lips pull up into a smile. "Tsuzuki-san. I missed you while you were recovering."
I hurt in places I didn't know ucould/u hurt. I manage a small groan.
"You're awake!" Hisoka's relieved voice reaches me, even if I can't see him. Relieved? What reason did he have to be relieved?
"I can't see." Great, blurt out the first thing that pops into my brain. Good going, Tsuzuki.
"Aa, there are bandages around your eyes to let them heal of the soot and ashes that got in there from the fire." Huh? What's this?
"Hisoka, what fire?" I might not be an empath, but I caught him off-guard enough to feel a bit of that surprise and concern he's feeling.
"You don't remember?" His voice is shaky. I wonder why...
I can tell I'm just giving off waves of confusion. My once thick mental shields are shattered.
I have no idea why.
I hear the door squeak open. "I'm just going to get Tatsumi and Watari, okay?" And then he's gone.
I'm left horribly confused. All I remember is trying to protect that girl...the one who blamed me for her friend's death.
But for some reason...I don't regret it at all.
I remember all my past sins, but I don't feel guilty.
I don't know what happened, but it seems like there is a thick scab over the guilt.
Must scratch it off.
Must try to remember.
Need to feel guilty need to feel worthless need to continue my penance scratch off the scab make the wound bleed once again-
Strong arms are pinning me to the bed. "Tsuzuki! Calm down!" Watari's urgent voice. Why is he urgent? He's usually his hyper version of calm. (Oxymoron, I know, but it's true.)
I struggle against the warm hands. "Who...? Whoever you are, let me go!"
"Will you stop scratching and hurting yourself?"
Tatsumi.
"I was hurting myself...?" At least now I can despise myself again. I'm hating how weak and raspy my voice sounds.
"Can you sit up?" Watari, WHY are you asking me this while you're helping me up?
"Apparantly I can." uARRRRRRG/u! I hate the way I sound!
I guess somebody else agrees with me because I now have a Stryofoam cup next to my lips. "Here." Hisoka's voice is gentle. Was he worried?
He tips the cup, and sweet, cold water runs into my mouth and down my throat. "Sank'yuu, Hisoka," I say when I've finished the water.
"You sound much better." He sounds like he's smiling. Hisoka? Smiling on my behalf?
"When can I get these bandages off? I'd really like to see." It's discomforting not seeing anything but darkness. And I want to ask about the fire when I can see their reactions, dammit.
After a pause, Watari said, "Well, it has been three weeks, so we should try. What do you think, Tatsumi?"
I suppose Tatsumi nodded because gentle hands started unwrapping the bandages from around my head. The first thing I saw was a pair of bespecticled cheerful orange eyes."Saa, Tsuzuki, how do you feel?"
uOW./u Just dandy, except for the burning pain in my eyes. I blinked, focusing my eyes better.
There was a sharp intake of breath from the other three occupants in the room. "What?" I blink again, focusing on the green-eyed Shinigami.
Who is staring at me in...
confusion and fear?
"Your eyes..." Tatsumi whispers, his own blue eyes wide, "Your eyes aren't purple anymore...they're red!"
...Oh, hey, look. Even 003 is staring. "Can I have a mirror?"
Hisoka silently handed me a hand-held mirror that was lying on the bedside table.
I shakily graps the handle and hold it up to my face.
Tatsumi was right. My eyes were no longer the color of amethysts...
They were the color of garnets.
The last thing I heard before I passed out was the mirror's glass breaking on the floor.
*~*~*
i"You have demon blood in you." The silver-eyed man reached out and touched my cheek."
"No human has those color eyes."
*FLASH*
"Your eyes....your eyes are red!"
*FLASH*
"You monster!"
"You killed all those people!"
*FLASH*
Child sobbing. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..."
*FLASH*
"Two gentlemen dead in a bed of roses."
*FLASH*
"I will never forgive you!"
*FLASH*
"Don't act like I don't know what you're up to, vampire!"/i
I wake up in a cold sweat, breathing hard.
I see a figure in the corner.
My garnet eyes widen.
"Oh, no..."
Thin lips pull up into a smile. "Tsuzuki-san. I missed you while you were recovering."