(A/N: This was done for an art exchange on DA in the group ZADR Orange. The request I got was: "Zim or Dib doing a strip-tease for the other. I don't care whose watching whom." It turned into this songfic with some amusing parts (to me) in it. I hope they like it, whoever they are...)
I feel like I'm hallucinating
Yeah you're tripping me out
I can't control it's you I'm craving
I can just tell you're down
There were two different kinds of thrumming—one was the bass of the song pulsating through the overkill-large speakers that Zim had randomly, and suddenly, installed in his underground base; the second was the noise Zim was giving off as he watched the spectacle unfold before him. Granted, he had asked for the Dib to do this, but not in this manner. And he never expected to produce such a sound.
"Hey Zim, you wouldn't happen to have some sort of advance, alien sound system in here?"
"Why would you wish to know? And tell Zim why he should tell you of these things that need telling!"
"...Um, wow. That was the single most complicated sentence I've ever heard outside of Doctor Seuss...Anyways, I figure if I'm going to get cut open into tiny pieces and put away in jars I may as well enjoy my last moments. Music is always a good way to relax so...do you?"
"Yes, yes Zim does. What do you wish to listen to?"
"Chain Reaction. By Ke$ha,. It's pop."
Silence then—
"THERE! Now Dib-beast, remove your skin-covers so that I may cut you apart and learn of your species' weaknesses."
"If you insist..."
Come get me, let's get rowdy
Boy you look so damn good on me
Back to the wall
On my silhouette
When you walked right by
Felt your breath on my neck
And it felt so deep
In a trance of a sleep
Have I seen you before?
Once in a dream
Zim could not understand why, but it seemed as though he had seen this scene before, in his head. Or perhaps it was deja vu—but NO! He was Irken and he had no real memory of the Dib-thing doing something as such! That would mean he was defective and there was no way on Irk that he was Defective. Defectives weren't Invaders and Zim was an Invader. So why did he feel like he had seen this before? Perhaps once in a dream, but he hadn't dreamed much since he had arrived at Earth. There was only one time he had dreamed and that was right before he had captured the Dib-monkey. The day before to be precise.
"Hey! Heey! HEEEEEEEY! Filth! Worm-baby! Disgusting hyu-man! DIB! PAY ATTENTION TO ZIM! HE IS TO BE YOUR FUTURE RULER! HOW DARE YOU IGNORE YOUR FUTURE SLAVE-MASTER?"
"Just shut up Zim..."
"The Dib is depressed! Yay! Now Zim can sneak up from behind and spirit the Dib away to his lab and cut him into itty-bitty pieces to put into jars to play with!"
"Whatever Zim, I don't care. And how are you supposed to sneak up on me from behind if you're in front of me and being so loud?"
"...Zim is not really here! Yes, this is a-erhm-hologram! That's it, this Zim is a hologram! A clever hologram made my Ziiiiiim."
"Just go away."
"Why?"
"Because I don't want you to be around!"
"Why?"
"Because I'm depressed!"
"Zim knew that. Why?"
"Because of Torque and Sarah and Moose!"
"Why?"
"They-they called me gay!"
"Why?"
"Because I like guys!"
"Why?"
"Just-just because I do, okay!"
"Why?"
"Nostradamus-fucking-dammit Zim! Leave me the hell alone!"
The sound of footsteps receding at a rapid pace. Then—
"Why?"
Like a flashback, sneak attack, chain reaction
At the first sight you just might be the right one
You got something and again like a rerun
Try but can't explain this chain reaction
Zim could not remember what he had dreamed about but seeing the Dib slowly pull his clothes off made Zim suspicious that it had something to do with this. However, at the moment Zim was too busy to be bothered by such trivial things such as deja vu; he was watching Dib pull off his shirt.
You hit me like a shot of whiskey
You got me walking sideways
Tunnel vision feeling frisky
Want to get you stuck on replay
Zim noticed that the first thing that Dib had discarded was his trench-coat; it was laying in a pile on the floor in the corner. But as soon as he heard the soft grunt of frustration he turned back to face Dib. Dib had his shirt halfway off, revealing a lean torso covered in scars from their various encounters. The scars were a soft pink and his skin was a tanned bronze. He watched as Dib finally got the shirt off and tossed it next to his coat. Then he began to unbutton his pants and Zim felt himself shudder in anticipation and his mind wandered back to a conversation he and Dib had a few days ago.
"Hey Zim?"
"Yeeeeees, Filth-stink?"
"Do Irkens have reproductive organs?"
"Hm? Why would you ask that?"
"Well I decoded some of your files and—"
"THOSE FILES WERE UN-CRACKABLE!"
"AND I found out that Irkens are created through the mixing of DNA and synthesis through a Hatchery. So I was wondering if Irkens still had reproductive organs, or if they had evolved out of them?"
"...Irkens still have reproductive organs, they are just vestigial. Unless needed, they remain that way. When needed, the reproductive organs manifest themselves and then they remain that way for the rest if the Irken's life. However, using reproductive organs is a right reserved to only the Taller and Tallest Irkens."
Dib blushed and broke eye-contact with Zim. Then—
"Oh..."
I don't fall like this
I must confess you cast a spell upon me
Shadows of us in the room of sweat
You took my hand to the back and the left
And it felt so deep
In a trance of a sleep
Have I seen you before?
Once in a dream
Zim was unsure of exactly why he had answered Dib's question truthfully that time. He did not need to know why Irkens had vestigial reproductive systems, nor did he need to know that they were used for pleasure only. And, to be perfectly honest, Zim left out one TINY fact from his explanation: Irkens could be either gender, male or female. They only identified themselves with whatever pronoun they felt like. Zim just so happened to like calling himself "Zim" and "he". That did not mean he could not be female as well. Call him a hermaphrodite, if it so pleases you. But the feeling that Zim was getting now as Dib finally removed his pants, coupled with the low, thrumming sound he was making meant only one thing: his body was telling him it was time to mate. He spoke up.
Like a flashback, sneak attack, chain reaction
At the first sight you just might be the right one
You got something and again like a rerun
Try but can't explain this chain reaction
"D-Dib..."
"Yes Zim?"
"I-ah...I want..."
"Yes?"
"I want to..."
"Yes?"
"I want to mate...with...you..."
A smirk played across Dib's lush lips as he walked over and straddled the alien. Then—
"I want to mate with you too."
Like a flashback, sneak attack, chain reaction
At the first sight you just might be the right one
You got something and again like a rerun
Try but can't explain this chain reaction