It'd been an hour since Alex had confronted Jay about what had happened at his apartment, about how he had broken in. Jay was still slightly shaken. Alex had yelled at him before, but there was something about this that was different. Alex wasn't usually physical with him - not in any negative way. Not like that.
Jay's hand clenched uncomfortably around the camera as he stepped toward Alex, who was leaning against his car, rather sexily if he said so himself. Jay dismissed the thought from his head, jaw set hard. "Alex," he said, trying to put some sort of angry infliction into his voice, or something that suggested he wasn't pleased. But his voice came out weak and uneven. Jay scowled.
Alex didn't answer.
"How...," Jay paused, swallowing, trying to maintain his composure. "How did you get out of your apartment?"
Alex lifted his head, glaring at Jay. Jay nearly recoiled. What was with Alex? Couldn't he forgive him this time? "You know, I brought you out here because I thought you could help. But you've only made things worse."
Jay flinched visibly. "I'm trying to help," he answered, averting his eyes, his camera still focused on Alex's face. "And it's not like you've done much either," he said, lifting his head to meet Alex's eyes. "You never call me."
Alex tensed. "These are two completely different subjects, Jay. Don't mix business with pleasure."
"Not like there is much pleasure anymore," Jay mumbled.
Alex took a step toward him, and Jay stepped back. "Maybe I've been trying too, Jay. There's a lot of shit going on with me. It's not like you're the only one affected by this. You act like you are, but you're not."
Jay straightened himself out. "I came out here to help you find that ex of yours, Amy. But with the way you've been acting, it seems like you want to do the exact opposite." Alex still cared about Amy, which Jay knew, but not in the same way he used to, not the way Alex did for Jay. Well, that was a lie. Alex didn't seem to care much for Jay lately.
Obviously Alex cared for Amy a little bit more than Jay had thought, because Alex was suddenly in his face, and he shoved him backward. Jay yelped, nearly tripping. "You listen to me," Alex snarled. "It's pretty fucking hard to look for someone when there are psychopaths wearing masks and your own boyfriend is breaking into your goddamn house."
Jay nearly whimpered, but made himself stare Alex back in the eye. The anger in his eyes was frightening, but Jay refused to back down. Not now. Not this time.
"None of that would have happened if you weren't here," he growled, glaring down at Jay, who suddenly felt very small.
Jay looked up at Alex, taken aback by his statement. That hurt. He was silent for a moment, trying to take in what Alex had just said. "Y-yeah…well…I've been trying to help you, but I've spent three months doing absolutely nothing, Alex. Not to mention this whole relationship is falling apart." He paused for a moment, looking away. "And I'm not the one to blame for that."
"How can I trust you with anything, Jay, when you're doing shit like this?" Alex asked. What, did he think Jay couldn't be trusted with his heart? All Jay ever did was support him. The same could not be said for Alex.
Jay's fist clenched around the camera. "I have done so much more than you."
Alex's jaw was set hard. "Oh, do you think you're making a big difference, Jay?"
"Yeah, I really do."
"Well, then you can do it on your own. Because I'm done with you." With that, Alex turned and stepped back toward his car, leaving Jay in a stunned silence.
His lip quivered, and he bit down hard on it to keep tears from sliding down his cheeks. Fine. Alex could break up with him. Whatever. Alex could do this himself. He obviously didn't need Jay, and Jay didn't need him.
But, as Alex drove away, Jay couldn't help but wonder how life could ever be the same without him.