I'm alive.

Seasons Change: my computer died, I typed this on my laptop, and I initially refused to continue writing it until I have a real keyboard. Inspiration hit me like a truck, so I just crapped this out.
In an hour.
Not edited or Beta'd. Raw writing at its best.

~Muse .:

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He always had that aura around him; the vibe that told others to get away and leave him alone. Even now, this little bubble remained though it was significantly weaker.

She was sure only she was allowed to stay near him – she almost felt as if that personal bubble of his warped and shifted to accommodate her. Maybe he sensed her presence; maybe he was actually reaching out, but Shiki would be there to take his hand. Which is what she did, her hand firmly grasping his. The brunette tried to ignore the clammy sweat that radiated from the boy. She was so sure he would able to fight it off. He always was able to.

Yet as her warm brown eyes flickered to his peach complexion, her eyebrows furrowed with worry. This time it seemed different. The boy was sweating more than usual, a small clear layer protecting his face. Her eyes followed a few slick drops of moisture gather to the tips of his orange hair (it never did manage to stay out of his face) and threatened to splash onto his forehead. She trapped the droplet onto her own, slim finger, wiping it against the bed she was perched on.

He mumbles and squeezes her hand. Just the slight pressure causes heat to spike up her spine and tingle to her face. She coos as soothingly as possible, lips barely grazing his ear, as he seems to shift towards the sound of her voice. She feels a grin playing at her lips, but it quickly disappears as he winces, eyes clenching together and causing the shiny skin to wrinkle at the gesture.

She takes a towel and carefully wipes down his face. He sighs into it, welcoming the cool feeling through his forehead. His jaw suddenly clenches and the pressure in her hand increases again, to which she lightly eases her hand out of his only to rest it on top. His shoulders slacken and his jaw unclenches slowly, surely.

She risks this moment to take her eyes off him for a bit. They wander around the room until they settle at the window. It was closed, with blue shades that flared out and over his covered body. There was a faint sunlight peeking through.

He'd make it. She was sure of it.

Suddenly his body tenses and she freezes, his hand curls around hers possessively as he grunts. She squeals in surprise as he pushes her down with him, brown hair crushing into orange as nose almost brushes nose. She looks at him questioningly but his eyes are still shut, the shallow breathing not missing a beat. She sighs and gives in, allowing her lips to brush against his. Cold.

She doesn't know how long she stays that way, her own breathing slowing as they remain motionless. She was all too aware of the way he held her now – one hand squeezing hers and the other hand on the small of her back. Their lips were just teasing each other, hovering above but not quite touching.

Suddenly the light floods into the room, causing her to squeeze her own eyes shut.

His open.

"Shiki?" His voice is thick, as if he hadn't used it in several years.

"Hi," she responds, feeling a little red as breath tickles her lips.

His eyes gaze over her face, memorising every contour, like he'd never see her again. Her complexion reddens as she realises his staring, but she doesn't move. His breathing, still shallow, suddenly deepens and slows.

"Are you alright?" she asks, the question hangs in the air heavy, like a large blanket that enveloped them both.

He takes another long, steady breath. "No," he says slowly. "It's worse."

She shifts downwards and his hands tighten, like he doesn't want her to leave. She shrugs the hand off her back, however, and rests her head against his chest before snuggling into it. "Wanna talk about it?"

His eyes darken noticeably but she knows she hasn't done anything wrong. He knows it too. He feels her head on his chest and makes up his mind.

"Shiki, it's getting worse. I see it all the time – you know – how I died. I see it all over again, when I almost killed you. How I almost killed you but this time… I wanted to. And I hear them all laughing, like I'm a pawn, and then Josh. Joshua who shoves me in front of that bomb Pi-Face gave me, Noise eating Rhyme and Beat but its like they're alive because they're bleeding – bleeding so much. Their flesh was falling on the floor and wolves were tearing at it. And then I see me, I see me holding a gun to your head an-"

She silences him by wrapping her arms around him. He feels his chest heave but collapse under her touch. He feels hot tracks begin to form down his cheeks. She notices them too, because she brushes them away.

"We're okay," she soothes. "We're okay."

He knew it was true.

But he couldn't stop the tears from falling.

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