Hello everyone!

I apologize in advance for the mistakes, English is not my native language.

Indeed, I invite you to tell me any mistake you notice, I'm here to improve.

Thanks to those who read !

It was predictable. There was nothing to be surprised.

When she had told her, her voice breaking with emotion, that she and Nakao would get married, Risa knew with absolute certainty that it was no longer possible to put off the confrontation with that big piece of her past.

She hung up, looking at the background photo saved on the phone. Her eyes stared for a while 'the illuminated pixels, but her thoughts were already lost, far away from where they had stopped to phone, over coffee not far from the statue of Hachiko.

Far from Tokyo where she had moved to attend graduate school, away from the voice of Nobu that had come from Hokkaido. They were flown directly to her family, to her adolescence, in Osaka. And to him.

Despite being past four years, she had not seen him again. And even though they had been four years, the feelings which have long grown along with her love for him had remained well hidden in the bottom of her heart. And even though they had been four years, the memory of the laughing face of Otani still hurt.

Suddenly, the phone rang, brutally interrupting the memories that were invading her while she stood in the streets of Shibuya, one the late morning of June.

Before answering, she mentally thanked Sakura, who was calling.

"Do not get excited Koizumi, I know that today you are on vacation and you don't wanna come to work, but I have a big favor to ask ... This afternoon we are short of a model for the shooting of YellowTree, and I thought, who better than her? Come on ... Please! this afternoon. I'm going to message the address later. Thanks, I owe you one! "

Sakura had interrupted the conversation, assuming that her employee had agreed to spend the afternoon of her day off to do a photo shoot. It was for the good of the company!

Risa sighed. She put the phone in her bag and without much hesitation she took the train to go home, now that was not much time left available.

She was not a professional model, but had happened several times that her acquaintances in the fashion thought of her for quick replacements. Thanks to her stature and her thinness in the first year at the technical school she had become the preferred model for the practical activities of the comrades, and soon after she went in the school catwalks.

It wasn't easy to learn how to walk on heels, but eventually was successful, despite her legendary clumsiness. Luckily even then it was no longer together with Otani, or she would be even more embarrassed. And so, sometimes she worked as a model for some agency. Replacements, mostly, but that had allowed to come into contact with those who did the work she wanted to do, and to learn.

Once arrived in Tokyo three years ago, to finish school, Risa had finally realized that she arrived at the right place. Stunned by the crowd of the megalopolis, she had discovered the center of the world in regard to fashion. From large boutiques of Ginza with the best of the big Western names, to the girls of Harajuku always in step with the new trends, through the glitzy Shibuya, producers and consumers of the fashion lived and breathed in the streets of the capital.

That night, despite the fatigue, Risa joined Riko and Mana for a drink. It was quite a while 'that she met her friends, and in the solitude of the frenetic pace of Tokyo occasionally it was needed to take a breather.

Mana saw at first glance that something was wrong in Risa. They had met in Tokyo, during a fashion show, and since then Mana had been in contact with that colleague a bit 'atypical, not interested in visibility and to make a career as a model, rather than studying to be a fashion designer.

"Tell me 'Risa, what? You have not said a word since we met." Mana asked point-blank, after the arrival of the third drink.

"Huh? No, I'm just a little 'tired ..."

"Um..." Riko mumbled, who was also unconvinced. Riko was the roommate of Mana. A native of Osaka too, was a few years younger than them, but in Tokyo for much longer, since she had behind an attempted career idol. Very beautiful and busty, Riko made his living as an actress in hardcore films.

The trio of scantily clad lanky put in agitation several males in the bar, which repeatedly tried to approach, but were regularly ignored.

"In four months I go back to Osaka, my best friend is going to marry" decided to say, looking disconsolate the glass she had just emptied.

Riko and Mana raised both their right eyebrow, with a synchronism unwanted.

"And then?" Riko urged.

"And then I'll have to see him for sure. He is the best friend of the groom, and I can not help but go there."

Mana blinked in surprise as her lips twisted into a grimace.

"It's not that you could keep on avoiding him..." said Mana with condescending tone, resting her hand on the forearm of Risa.

"And above all, it must not go wrong with all men just because he has behaved like a jerk. You have to go on with your life ..."

"Come on Riko! We did this talk a thousand times ... It's not easy for Risa!"

"But she has to overcome this trauma!"

"Waiter! Another round!" Risa said, thinking that another drink could give her the strength to support the talks that would be born soon.

"But think about it. How many years has it been?" Riko continued.

"Four"

"It's a long time ... And yes Hajime was really nice ..."

Risa's cheeks, already reddened by alcohol, suddenly turned white. Mana, and especially Riko, were two girls series and reliable, with whom she trusted and liked, but she still was not able to get used to their open vision and unbiased relations with the opposite sex.

"Er ... Yes, Hajime was cute but ... not ..."

"Riko stop! Don't you see that talk in this way is worse?"

"Excuse me Risa, but I don't understand. Making love with the one you like is one of the most wonderful things to do. A lot of studies say this: sex improves mood and tissue oxygenation, maintains healthy, does well skin ... And it is nice. Very nice. I've already told you, your trauma must be overcome, go to a psychologist when soon because you risk losing the best years of your life if you don't solve your problem... "

The waiter brought them drinks, interrupting the conversation.

The next morning, Risa woke up with a headache, a severe nausea and little desire to go to work. The night out with the girls, instead of lighten her, had sunk her psychologically and physically. And yes she knows all too well how little she was able to withstand the alcohol. Still, the artificial light in which she wrapped herself made her forget for a while 'as her love life was a disaster.

The hangover awakenings reported the same blunting of that first time, the same bitter taste in the mouth, the same desperation that she left the situation going in a direction not desired, the same sense of inadequacy experienced four years earlier. The same sadness.