Finn has never been one for parties. The only reason he ever goes to them is to keep up appearances or just keep in touch with a few friends. But the second they bust out the alcohol, he's gone.
It's not like he's a prude or anything, it's just that he doesn't really see how not remembering a whole night and throwing up the next morning can be considered "fun". Plus, his mother would have his head when he got home.
He didn't think Amanda felt differently. In fact, he didn't even know Amanda knew Tyler Dember well enough to go to one of his parties. Tyler is the school's party boy. Almost every weekend his parents are out of town and the supply from the liquor cabinets is infamous for seeming endless.
His parties were also infamous for ending in a police raid and someone narrowly avoiding an arrest.
Which is why when Finn got a text on Friday from an unknown number saying how Amanda was in no condition to stay or find a ride home, he was in the car driving to Tyler's house.
The place is either a disaster or a hot mess, depending on who you asked- rap music blaring from inside the home seemed to spill out the open windows and Finn can practically smell the alcohol from the littered front yard. A few girls from school smile and wave clumsily as he walks up to the door. Finn gives them a polite smile in return and ignores their drunken squeals as he enters the house.
After walking around the humid, trashed house for 15 minutes he finally finds her sitting on the back steps of the house, head hung and a bottle in her hand. He breaths a sigh of relief and goes to open the screen door when Greg Luwoski sits himself next to Amanda. They speak quietly for a few seconds but when the conversation seems to start turning sour, Amanda lifts the bottle to her lips to take a swig in attempt to ignore Greg, who in return, snatches it from her hands and empties it in the grass. He opens the door as he sees Amanda trying to stand up and puts a hand on her arm in attempt to steady on the steps.
Both their heads turn as he says "I've got it from here."
Greg looks from Amanda to Finn and nods curtly, shoving his hands into his pockets before turning back to the bonfire happening further down the yard.
Finn hears Amanda groan from beside him, tearing her arms from his grip and sitting herself back down. "What are you doing here?" she grumbles, looking away from him.
"Simple, getting you out of here." He holds out his hand for her to take - which she glances at and ignores. He sighs and runs a hand through his hair, "Come on, Mandy, it's late. Let's get you home."
"No. I'm having fun." She says stubbornly, crossing her arms over her knees and pouting.
"Really? All by yourself?" He says, amused. This seems to make her even more upset and when a couple passes by them to get inside, Amanda snatches the bottle of beer from the guy's hand and sends the boy off with a nasty glare when he opens his mouth to complain.
She smiles smugly, waving the bottle like a pendulum from it's neck with her tiny fingers teasingly, "A blast." She takes a long drink right in front of him and smiles.
Finn knows better than to lecture her, Amanda's as much as a smart girl as she is a challenging one. Actually, he thinks that's what makes her so smart. He knows she's not a drinker or smoker, but she has a knack for pushing buttons.
He plops himself down beside her and stares at her while she tries to avoid his eyes. She fiddles with her fingers and the bottle, her cheeks still puffed in a pout. He resists the urge to smile.
Her skin is flushed, her cheeks and forehead dewy with sweat. He puts a hand on her head, smoothing out her ratty hair and says, "What are you doing, Amanda?"
She's quiet for a bit, snuggling up to his hand like a cat before studying the bottle in her hands and shrugging defeatedly. "I don't even know" she says softly. She puts a hand to her forehead and sighs shakily.
Finn doesn't take that for an answer and moves his face right next to hers. He asks again, more softly this time, his hand still petting her hair, "What are you doing, Amanda?"
She takes a nasty swig and says roughly as the alcohol burns her throat, "I'm forgetting." She turns her head towards his and they're less than two centimeters apart. He can see her glassy eyes fogging up and smell the alcohol in her breath. "Why can't I forget Dillard?" Amanda says miserably.
The answer stills Finn for a second, stinging like a whip. It almost takes him a second to remember Dillard isn't just not here, at this party, but gone.
"I was looking through the school yearbook and I saw this picture of you guys when you were younger, I guess-" Amanda confesses quietly, "and I just couldn't help but think 'How was this God's plan for him?' and, like, other spiritual crap like that. And then I felt vulnerable and then I felt pathetic and then dependent. " She takes a shaky breath before laughing nervously, "I felt responsible."
Well, technically, all the Keepers felt responsible. It hit them each in their own waves, some earlier and more rough than others. Finn assumed it was Amanda's turn.
Amanda wasn't drinking for attention or to have a good time, Finn realizes. She was drinking to-
"You wanted to feel numb."
She nods and then says, "Now, I just feel stupid." Tears spill down her red cheeks and she sniffles softly, quickly trying to hide her tears from everyone else around them. "And sad."
Finn casually loops his arm around her head and pulls her face into his neck, cuddling her, and effectively hiding her from the party-goers. He feels her breath on his neck and ignores the flush rising up his own cheeks. He busies himself with throwing the half full bottle of beer into a bush before Amanda could notice.
Amanda is still sniffling 5 minutes later, but removes herself from his neck and wipes her nose with her sleeve. She watches him quietly as he stands up and offers her his hand.
They've just started the ignition when Finn turns to Amanda, who hasn't spoken a word since her small breakdown, and asks her if she wants to freshen up at his house before he drops her off at the Nash house. She agrees and quietly takes his hand as he drives. He gives her a squeeze every few minutes.
When they get inside his room he notices Amanda's eyes are still incredibly glassy, but less than when he found her earlier that night… or morning. He clears his throat as he starts opening drawers, grabbing an old pair of sweatpants and a tee shirt and giving them to her as he guides her to his bathroom.
"You going to be alright in there?" Finn asks, worriedly, as he eyes the tiles that cover the floor of the shower, "You're not going to slip or anything, right?"
She doesn't respond and just continues looking at him, towel and change of clothes in her arms.
Finn cocks his head but ignores her silence, "Uhm, well, alright. I'll be in my roo-"
Amanda grabs his hand before he leaves, "Stay." She kicks off her beaten, high top converse and steps clumsily into the shower. "Stay." She repeats.
"Amanda…" he warns. She just looks back at him.
He looks at her for a moment and he isn't quite sure what to do. But when Amanda's hand reaches out for his again, he finds himself slipping off his own shoes and stepping into the shower with her.
He takes her into his arms as she starts to cry and turns on the shower.
She starts mumbling into his shirt and he just shushes her as he sits them both down on the tile. He sees the mascara he never even knew she applied run down her cheeks and stain his hands as she cries harder.
"Stay." He manages to understand from her mumbles. He holds her just a little bit tighter.
It's almost 6 am on Saturday when he finally drops Amanda off at the Nash House. He helps her into her bedroom window and tries not think too much of her wearing his clothes.
He doesn't hear from her again till 11 pm on Sunday.
She just wanted her clothes back.