Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. I own neither Ed, nor Al, nor Barry the Chopper, nor Lt. Ross, nor Roy.
Author's Notes: I had a lot of fun making these up. One of these days I should try and find Asimov's Books of Dirty Limericks. He wrote those, you know. A respected Sci-fi and Science writer like him. Who knew? I dedicate this to the Queen of Swords, author of many excellent Slayers fanfics, and my inspiration for this little bit of silliness. Who knew her limerick about Zellas Metallium would turn into this?
Mishi's Compendium of Inoffensive Fullmetal Alchemist Limericks
There once was a butcher named Barry
Who chopped up every Tom, Dick and Harry
But he got arrested and in combat was bested
That poor little convict named Barry.
There once was a looie named Ross
She was faithful to a fault to her boss
But then she got framed, for murder she was blamed
To the army this was such a loss.
There once was a man called Roy
Who recruited a twelve-year-old boy
He wants to be King, now that would be something
A young president-king called Roy.
There once was a 'chemist called Ed
Who was dressed in a coat colored red
He'd be ready to beg for his arm and his leg
And his brother's real body and head.
Author's Notes: A Looie is army slang for lieutenant... I think. Meh... I'm not too happy about the last two lines in the Roy one. I just couldn't think of anything to go after 'a twelve-year-old boy'. That's really the punch.