Title: Watching You Sleep
Plot: He tried to stay with her, to watch over her, to protect her and keep her safe. He liked to think of himself as her guardian angel.
I wouldn't mind it one bit if this was all that there was to life. I could happily stay right here, just like this, forever, just watching her as she slept peacefully next to me.
Her chest rose and fell steadily, finding a perfect rhythm, with each breath she took, her head occasionally taking the time to nuzzle itself against her pillow.
I was trying to not make any noise, settling myself quietly next to her, not even bothering to get under the covers out of fear that it might wake her up.
The bright morning sun gave her a backlight, setting her hair aglow, as it crept through the slats in the blinds, bathing the room in light.
She looked so calm, so comfortable and happy. She was smiling in her sleep, softly mumbling to herself as she dreamt.
I loved to see her smile, it lit me up inside just to know that she was happy with life, elated by just the thought of being here.
Just being here, with me, and the pets (well, if you could even call them that). She seemed to, and I know I did, enjoy our humble, simple little existence, here in the privacy of her flat.
I remembered having to live with Lester, being miserable, bored out of my mind, with nothing to do, no one to talk to. I mean, yes, I had someone to talk to, I had Lester, but he wasn't the right someone. Or, more specifically, he wasn't Abby.
She understood me, even when no one else did, even if she didn't want me.
She knew me entirely too well now, to the point where she could flawlessly, effortlessly, finish my sentences for me, answer my questions before I had even asked them.
She was right there, in my head, even before I was myself. If she really wanted to, she could tell me exactly what to think. But she didn't.
Well, yes, in a way, she did. But it wasn't her own doing, it's not like she was forcing me to think about her all the time. It was entirely by my own choice.
Well, it had started out as a choice, by now, it was becoming more of a pleasant, welcome obsession.
I heard Abby shift next to me, take a deep breath as she slowly opened her eyes. "Connor," she said my name softly, in one breath, it sounded like she was just saying it in her sleep.
She knew I was there, she already knew, without as much as turning her head to look at me, without having to reach back to make sure she felt me behind her, she could be so absolutely sure that I was on the other side of the bed.
"Hey, you," I said quietly, a broad grin coming onto my face as soon as I saw she was awake.
She smiled back at me, turning so that she was facing me completely. "Hey," she repeated drowsily. "How long have you been in here?"
I shrugged. "A while," I answered, a chill creeping slowly up my spine as she ran her hand tenderly along my cheek. "I just um- I wanted to make sure you were sleeping alright," I told her, waiting to see a reaction.
Her smile became wider, more obvious. "You didn't have to do that, Connor," she told me softly, her hand lying flat against my skin now, her thumb resting gently on my cheekbone. "But thank you."
I waved the thought away with my hand. "Oh, no, it's fine," I told her, every bit meaning it. "I don't mind, really," I reassured her, taking her other hand and putting it gingerly in mine, watching as she didn't back away or stiffen, but moved closer to me, leaving only inches between us. "Connor?" "Hmmm?" "Why do you care so much about me?"
My mind raced, trying to find a way to answer her, something I could say. I had always known that I cared about her, but I had honestly never actually sat down and thought about the reason why.
But now, it all made perfect sense to me. I didn't want anything to happen to her, because I didn't want to be, couldn't, be without her. And I couldn't be without her because I knew, deep down I knew, that I wouldn't be able to find anyone else like her. For me, there could never be another Abby Maitland, just like I hoped that, for her, there could never be another Connor Temple.
I had to swallow, before I could finally answer her. "I just- I don't…want anything happening to you," I said, my hand moving slowly up to her shoulder, as if to hold her there, make sure she wasn't going to leave. "I want to be able to…take care…of you."
She gave a soft, contented laugh. "That may be the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me," she said quietly, adjusting herself so that her upper body was on top of mine, her head resting gently on my shoulder. She nuzzled herself softly against me as I put my arm protectively around her, pulling her closer to me.
I could feel her heartbeat through my shirt, could feel her warmth soaking through to my skin. Her hair left a pleasant tickle on my neck, the sweet smell of her skin, of her hair, filled my head, imprinted itself in every one of my thoughts.
"I'm sure that's not true, Abs," I said softly, slowly, as if in a daze. I absentmindedly ran my fingers through her hair.
She stared wistfully up at me, her previous smile fading until the point where it was just barely there. "It shouldn't be," she said quietly, taking a deep breath, as if eager to change the subject.
"You're too good to me, Connor," she told me, lifting her head to press her lips softly against the skin of my neck, letting them linger there for a moment, a small moment, but a perfect one that seemed to last forever, her lips soft and feather-light against my skin, her cool breath sending a shiver through my body as she backed away and returned her head to my shoulder, the way I could feel it afterwards, all of it, as if it was happening all over again.
"That's one of my favourite things about you, Connor," she said quietly, tracing her finger lightly over my chest before her hand finally found a place to settle itself. "Is it?" "Yeah."
I smiled to myself, thinking how perfect this all was, having her here, so close to me, it felt so natural, like it was meant to end up like this all along, just me and Abby. "You actually have favourite things about me," I said softly, almost, but only almost, not believing it.
Her lips curved up into a bright smile again, she stroked my cheek gently, as if to reassure me of the fact that what she was telling me was true. "Of course I do," she said, almost in a whisper. "Why wouldn't I?"
It was just a casual question, it should have been a simple one to answer. Except it wasn't, it wasn't at all simple, because with answering it, there came complications, memories that would no doubt resurface. "I just-I wanted to…make sure…that you-"
"Connor," she stopped me, bringing her eyes up to meet mine. I recognised that look in her eyes, that look I had learned to look for. That look that meant she understood, that told me I didn't need to finish, didn't need to explain any further. "I would never do that to you."
I nodded, almost reluctantly, watching her as she searched my face for any kind of reaction. "Okay?" She lifted her head to ask my in my ear, her voice coming out as a whisper.
"Okay," I replied softly, bending down to kiss the top of her head, moving my other arm until it was wrapped gently around her waist, until I was holding her tightly against me, with all intentions of never letting her go.
No, she wouldn't do that to me. She wasn't Caroline, she actually cared about me, actually wanted to be with me. There was no payment involved, nothing in it for her. I was actually of some value to her, I wasn't simply some sort of pawn.
She smiled sympathetically up at me, reaching up to tentatively play with a particularly out of place lock of my hair, smoothing it back into place, tucking it neatly back behind my ear. "You look tired."
Her fingertips swept lightly over my eyelids, they submissively fell closed under her touch, immediately giving in to her. "You couldn't sleep?"
Her voice was so…warm, so comforting, like a lullaby in its own, my personal lullaby, whispering concerns in my ear, already starting to put me to sleep.
I shook my head weakly, wanting to open my eyes to look at her, but not being able to find the strength to do so. "I…I mean…I could…just…not…"
She placed a thin finger over my lips to silence me, leaning closer to me to shush me. "It's okay, Connor," she mumbled into my ear, before moving to press her lips over mine, cutting off all thoughts in my head, turning me numb, shutting out the world around us, until the only thing I knew was this moment, this perfect, precious moment, with Abby in my arms, as she softly, slowly put me to sleep.
I wouldn't mind it one bit if this was all that there was to life. I could happily stay right here, just like this, forever.
Because yes, she did really love me, she did really care about me, just like I did her, and she would, I would, until we couldn't any more, until some unseen force tore us apart.
But right now, there was nothing, nothing except for her kisses, soft and sweet, each one seeming to last a different forever, nothing except for the two of us, impossibly entangled in one another's thoughts and in one another's hearts.