The Mask Will Crack, The Heart Will Heal
"What is your freaking problem Edward?!"
"I don't know Isabella, what is my problem? Do tell me so that I can fix it and abide to your every whim."
"Why is it that all guys are so adamant on becoming asses?! Ugh! This is why I don't date boys like you."
"Okay then, while we're on the subject; why pray tell, do you not date men like me? Is it because we bring you back to actual reality? That you can't have everything you want? That you're not the most important person in the world? Or is it that we remind you that all you are; is a spiteful, lonely, hag that has no life outside of this office?"
The tears welled up in her eyes, the fury, hurt, and desperation, over flowing; only achieving in making Isabella Swan even more frustrated at her weakness.
He stood there shocked at the words that had escaped his mouth before he could think to shut it. Why am I such an idiot? He thought to himself. You made her cry! You're an asshole. What would Esme think? How could you be so inconsiderate?! The thoughts bombarded Edward's head as he stood before his crying co-worker, knowing that the only reason she was crying was because of him.
"My life is none of your business Mr. Masen and you haven't the slightest clue to what you are talking about, so do us both a favor. Leave me the hell alone."
She turned and bolted back to her office down the hall. Slamming the door shut and locking it before giving into the feelings wanting to overwhelm her. Her back pressed against the door and she slid to the ground. Pulling her legs up to her body and hugging them close; she tried to get rid of all the feelings running through her. Why can he affect me like this, when no one else can?
Her whole past was right back on her doorstep now, just waiting for her to fall back into it. To fall back into the chasm that she just barely escaped only a few months ago.
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No one had been in the office for days; they had all readily accepted the paid vacation that was offered them; all but Isabella Swan that is. She was still there, still working, but that wasn't anything new.
He was right and she knew it, her life was this office, but it hurt to be reminded so blatantly; especially by him.
At home the only thing awaiting her was a tv dinner, a book, and a warm fireplace. No, it might not seem so bad, but below the surface everything was bad.
She lived and breathed The Cullen Corporation, all divisions of it; music, toys, fashion, interior design, medicine, and just recently cars. Cullen Corp. had just landed an amazing deal with a small company that had amazing potential. Volturi was a car company that specialized in matching individual people with the car that matched their personality perfectly. They hadn't received too much attention yet but Carlisle saw potential in it, just like he had seen in her.
She had started out as an intern in her junior year of her bachelor's degree at Dartmouth. Normally it was offered to grad students who could be hired right after the internship but Bella was a different story.
Carlisle Cullen was the president and owner of the Cullen Corporation and took special interest in her future and saw a lot of potential in her, the exceptionally bright 21 year old undergrad; that had everything in the world to live for. She had a loving boyfriend, a family, a full ride, and an internship that no one under the age of 27 had gotten ever before. Her family and friends drove her to greatness and she embraced it.
Her parents did the best they could in the small town of Forks, Washington. Charles was the police chief of the city and her mother, Renee, was an elementary school teacher in the small Fork's Elementary. Isabella lived, breathed, and studied. Jacob Black supported and helped his life-long friend turned girlfriend. He helped her study and made sure no one bothered her about her apparent 'geekyness'. Though Isabella was very smart, there was nothing geeky about her, so his help wasn't exactly needed, but much appreciated.
She stood at 5'5, without heels, and had a lean but feminine body with curves in all the right places. Her long mahogany hair touched the bottom of her shoulder blades, and her deep chocolate eyes swallowed you whole when she smiled. She was confident, beautiful, and spunky.
Carlisle Cullen saw a lot of potential in her indeed. And he was right; she ended up graduating early and finishing grad school in record time. She came to work for the company and quickly worked up the chain till she became a young junior executive. Once she had the power title things started looking up. The company revenues sky rocketed and the company started growing and eventually became the corporation it was today. But it didn't start to become the corporation until there was a drastic change in Isabella Swan's behavior and work habits.
It seemed like she was the first one there and last one out. There were even rumors of her sleeping in her office, but those weren't at all true. She had only done that once, and made sure from then on to go home for at least a few hours of sleep each night, or morning which ever. Her spunky and cheerful demeanor was no more. She would smile for clients and her boss, but if you truly looked, there wasn't any light in her eyes anymore and you couldn't find even a trace of emotion on her face.
Those small fake smiles were the only thing you ever saw on her face, until tonight. Those tears were the first she had cried in over 3 years, and only Edward Masen could have ever caused them.
For as much as she denied it her heart had melted a little when she met him, and her heart gave the slightest flutter whenever she saw him. She longed for those few times a day where they would see each other and have a face off. He would glare at her and she would glare right back with just as much intensity. And then once or twice a week they would be forced to speak and it would always end up with them yelling insults at each other, but nothing of the severity he had yelled that evening. Isabella did not even remember what she had done wrong to offend him and make him hate her the way he did, but she did know the reason he hated her now.
It was for her position and how fast she had acclaimed that position that Edward hated her. Edward was her age and had just started working for the CC, but was rising at about the same speed if not faster than Isabella had. He had no reason to hate her, be jealous sure, but hate her? No, that was completely uncalled for and she couldn't understand why it even bothered her.
Edward Masen on the other hand, he knew he did not hate her. He knew he was only slightly jealous of her, but only at the beginning. He grew to know that she had earned it and was quite intelligent. He was the unknown son of Carlisle Cullen, but had wanted to work his way up. He did not want people to say he was given the job on a silver platter just because of who his daddy was; so he took his birth name. But Edward did not treat Isabella with distain because of that.
He had come in that night to 'get a file'. Edward just wanted to see her. No one else was around the office, so he wouldn't be caught, but he never expected to run into her and he definitely didn't expect to hurt and degrade her the way he had.
Secretly he revered her and worshipped the ground the Goddess walked on. Her beauty had captured him and her brain had completely overwhelmed him. He was lost to the woman that Isabella Swan was. He longed to know why she was so dead on the inside and out. Edward knew at the very beginning what she really was; a shell with a mask. He knew how long she worked; he knew she never had any personal calls, dates, or lunches, and he knew she didn't have any friends at the office. He wasn't a stalker, but he paid close attention to her and was very worried about his co-worker. Okay that's totally crap, he was and is completely head over heels in love with her; with who she was now, who he knew she once had been, and who she could be in the future.
What Edward did not know was what had happened for her to become this way. He used to come home from school on breaks or talk to his father over the phone and hear him boast about Isabella and how she was so bright and cheery and wonderful and then suddenly Carlisle didn't speak of her at all. If he did it was to talk about how hard she was working, but how he was worried about her. No one knew what inspired the change and no one was close enough to her to ask about it. Esme, Edward's mother, who was closer to her than the rest, had tried once, and that did not go very well.
Isabella only talked when necessary and showed real emotion very rarely. The one and only time Edward saw real emotion on her face was when they had their weekly yelling matches and when they had their showdowns across the way from each other in the office. Which is why he usually initiated the whole thing, he just wanted to see some tiny spark of life in her eyes and those instances gave him that gift. Yes Edward knew she probably hated him, but at least he was getting some sort of emotion rather than the cold shoulder everyone else got.
But that night, this night, he had crossed a line. He knew it and she knew it. He had gone too far with his comments. Edward hated himself for making her cry, but at the same time was glad to see some sort of emotion other than anger on his angel's face.
He knew that if he was ever going to try and claim her heart he had to do it tonight, while her heart was open, even if it was only open because of the pain he had caused her. Even if she slammed the door in his face or slapped him, both justifiably, he needed to try.
Isabella still lay curled over in a lump against her door sobbing; wishing she would have just gone to her apartment rather than her office. Now she was afraid to try and leave and end up facing him again. She was afraid not of him, but of the feelings she knew she would feel if she saw him. She knew he hadn't really meant any of the things he said, that he had just gotten caught up in the moment but it didn't change what he said. She knew she couldn't hate him though, no matter what he did.
Isabella knew that she couldn't lock herself in all night; she had to leave eventually, so she decided to put on her mask once more and pray that she didn't run into Mr. Masen on the way out. Slowly she picked herself off of the floor and made her way to her vanity mirror beside the door to assess the damage.
As she looked in the mirror for the millionth time in three years, she looked upon herself and for the first time really looked at herself. Usually she would only check to make sure her makeup and hair was perfect for a meeting, or make sure she didn't have anything in her teeth; but this time she really looked. She noticed how much these past few years had changed her. She looked at the paleness of her translucent skin that once had had a beautiful red stain because of her blush. She saw her hair in its usual low bun, something she would have never done with her hair before the accident. Then Isabella looked into her own eyes and saw that her mask didn't hide her hurt at all. She saw all the pain, agony, and guilt she had been dealing with there in her eyes. As she gazed upon herself she grew frustrated and upset with herself.
Isabella had had enough with all of this crap pushing down on her. This person she was looking at in the mirror wasn't her. This wasn't Bella, this was Isabella, and she was done. Bella ripped the rubber band out of her hair, flipped her head down shook her hair out and flipped it back. Her shiny brown hair was once again flowing around her face and a little flush was back in her face.
"I am done with wearing a mask everyday! I'm sick of being alone! I'm just done!" She shouted out her new found realizations and then fell to her knees and screamed. She screamed for all she had lost, she screamed for all she had kept in, she screamed for herself, and she just let it all out. All of the feelings she had been repressing for three years consumed her and she let them. Edward had chipped at the wall around her heart piece by piece everyday for the past few months and finally the last piece had started to crack. She knew then that he was the only one that could save her, the only one that understood her, the only one that could affect her this way, and the only one she wanted to see right then.
Edward had heard Isabella's scream, and their argument be damned, he ran to her as fast as his legs could carry him. What he saw when he opened the door to his love's office broke his heart, but still gave him hope. There kneeling on the ground screaming out it pain was his angel, his love, his Bella. Her beautiful hair was flowing around her and he could practically taste the tears that were running down her face.
Rushing towards her, he dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around her. But as soon as he realized what he had done he froze, not knowing how she would react. Edward nearly jumped out of his skin when Bella wrapped her arms around him and pulled him as close to her body as she could get him. He helped as much as he could, wrapping his arms tightly around her as well. Edward kissed any part of her he could, whispering her name over and over.
Bella sat on the floor of her office sobbing and screaming when suddenly a pair of arms and the most beautiful scent in the world encased her trembling form. Even though she had never felt these arms before she would know them anywhere, Edward, her Edward. His arms around her made her heart flutter and her soul feel complete. As quick as they were there, his arms froze, she knew he was probably afraid of her reaction so she followed her heart and quickly encased him in her arms. The closer she pulled him, the tighter her arms became the better she felt, but nothing could beat when his arms wrapped around her as well. She buried her head in his chest and breathed in his scent.
Bella felt Edward's lips on her hair, her neck, her ears, and heard him whisper her name over and over.
"Bella, my Bella, my love, my Bella." Every time she felt his breath on her skin she trembled.
They don't know how long they sat on the floor of her office, it felt like an eternity but it also felt like no time at all before Bella spoke.
Bella spoke in a hoarse whisper, her throat soar from screaming.
"Edward, I don't know why or how but I know I need you in my life. Help me to feel again Edward. Help me break down the last thing standing between you and my heart. Please. I need you."
"As you wish my love."
Edward lifted Isabella and gently sat her on the couch in her office. She sat with her hands in her lap and her head down. He lifted her chin to look into her eyes and slowly moved his face closer to hers. Both their eyes shifted between each other's mouths and eyes, both of them anticipating what would come next.
"May I?" Edward whispered into the silence, receiving a nod from Bella in response.
No sooner than she had moved her head, their lips met slowly and softly. Bella sighed into the kiss and moved her hands into his soft auburn locks. Taking a chance Edward licked Bella's lower lips seeking entrance to deepen the kiss. She moaned at the feel of his tongue on her lips and lost control of herself. Her hands fisted in his hair and she sucked his tongue into her mouth. Edward crushed her body against his, both of them losing themselves in the kiss.
One of his hands wound itself into her hair and tugged on it gently, the other making its way to the front of her blouse where he slowly started to unbutton her shirt. Once her shirt was off he caressed her soft delicate skin with his hands and broke the kiss in order to caress her skin with his lips. He moaned at the taste of her skin, an overload of her sweet scent clouding his senses. As his exploration slowed he kissed and sucked her neck causing her to moan loudly as feelings of utter adoration and love swept over her. His nimble fingers unclasped her bra and gently threw it across the room. He reluctantly removed his face from her neck, but was rewarded with the sight of his angel's glorious chest. His mind was a haze and his eyes were glazed over because of her perfection.
The feel of Edward's stare made Isabella feel self conscious and ashamed, so she dropped her eyes and moved to cover herself, but her hands were caught in his.
"Don't." She left her head down, tears falling from her eyes.
"Look at me." He said gently, removing his hand from her wrists.
Slowly her eyes met his and his hands immediately rose to wipe away her tears.
"You're beautiful Isabella; never hide your perfection from my eyes." He smiled when a blush rose to her cheeks. Edward ran his fingers over her red heated cheeks.
"Just another thing that enhances your beauty my Bella." He kissed her cheeks then trailed kisses down to her chest.
He ran his hands down the sides of her breasts and she inhaled sharply at the shock running through her. Edward's thumbs brushed her already hard nipples, toying with them gently before pinching them earning a loud gasp and moan from his angel.
Bella was on another planet, feeling things she hadn't felt since Ja-, since before the accident. Her heart was pounding, her head was spinning, and her core was pulsing. She never thought she could feel this way again, ever, but he affected her like no one else could.
Edward continued palming and playing with her breasts, teasing and pleasing her until she stopped him.
"Please Edward, I need you."
Edward stood and slipped his shirt over his head wordlessly. Unbuckling his belt and lowering his pants, he revealed ivy green silk boxers.
Bella gasped as she took in the Adonis standing before her. Her eyes traced every contour, every muscle, every freckle in sight before taking in the large erection straining against the fabric of his boxers.
He knelt before her once more to unzip her skirt. Once unzipped, he pulled her skirt and underwear from her body and gazed upon Isabella for the first time in all of her glory.
To say she was beautiful would desecrate her very existence. The woman, this angel before him took his breath away. She made him feel things he never thought he would feel and apparently he had the same affect on her, though he had no clue as to why. Someone, somewhere thought he was worthy of this creature before him and he would thank them every day for eternity for that gift. But as he looked into her chocolate orbs he knew that tonight, those things did not matter.
No more feelings of self doubt, self loathing, or unworthiness would reside in them tonight. They both understood their need for each other. For tonight it was just them, in their own world, where they were beautiful, worthy, and loved.
He removed his boxers quickly before starting to run his hands over her legs, reveling in the soft creaminess of her skin. Kissing slowly up her legs he reached the apex of her legs and took in the scent of her aroma. She was warm and dripping and the fact that it was all for him sent a shock straight to his already rock hard cock. He placed a soft kiss on her lower lips and his tongue swiped at the heavenly fluid that was there.
They were both panting in need and Edward knew it was time; time to break down the last of her walls and time to finally claim her as his own.
Slowly they shifted to where they were both laying down, her beneath him whilst he held himself above her, careful not to crush her.
Edward looked into her deep brown eyes and she stared straight back into his shining emeralds. He placed himself at her entrance and spoke softly.
"I love you Isabella Swan." Before she could respond he captured her lips in a passionate kiss and slid into her with one swift stroke.
She was so tight and warm, it was taking nearly all of his strength not to thrust into her with wild abandon, like he so wished he could. But he knew this wasn't about some quick satisfaction; this was about helping his angel feel again, helping her be herself again; this was about making slow, passionate love to her.
As he struggled to keep control he looked down into her eyes and saw discomfort in them. And when he saw a tear slide down her cheek all thoughts of him losing control were gone; all he could think about was how stupid he was to forget that this would be uncomfortable for her.
It had been quite awhile since her last time with a man so his length stretched her uncomfortably.
He was larger than her first and only partner had been and that was years ago.
But even though she was uncomfortable physically, mentally she was happy to be feeling something other than the dark empty feelings that normally consumed her. But underneath the pain of being stretched there was also a feeling of completion and rightness in being with him, which left her aghast.
As her thoughts started to focus on the feeling of being with him, the sparks shooting throughout her any place his skin touched hers, the way her heart felt like it was starting to heal, the pain she felt where they were joined started to fade.
Edward and Bella's eyes stayed connected as the pain began to fade, so as soon as he saw it in her eyes he began to pull out slowly.
Placing chaste kisses all over her face he moved back into her warmth. Testing the waters he continued his slow strokes, helping her pain become pleasure. He slid his arms under the tops of hers and placed his hands under her head, cradling her as close to him as possible.
As he started rocking into her gently, her pleasure overtook her body and she began to rock back against him. This was no longer him making love to her, it was them making love to each other.
They continued to thrust against each other, at a slow constant, but intense pace. There was no need to rush or go at a frantic pace, only the need to feel each other. Their joined bodies united their souls so completely it was as if they were one person. Their bodies molded together, their hearts blended, and their eyes remained locked. No words needed to be said as their eyes revealed everything, laying it all on the line, and there was no fear of rejection. The only sounds to be heard were of heavy breathing, whispers of joyous cries, and of bodies joining.
The seconds, minutes, and hours were lost upon them as they sealed their love. They had no track of time or place, no thoughts of work or fights. Only their intense feelings existed in this moment. Only they existed.
The whispers of passion turned to cries of relief as they tumbled over the cliff together. Neither moved as their fall slowed, they only gripped tighter to each other. As their breathing slowed they stayed connected, not out of fear but out of their need to be close.
The room remained quiet and still apart from their lips meeting every few moments.
The silence was pierced by a small plea. "Say it again Edward."
No explanation or clarification was needed.
Edward leaned his lips toward her ear and whispered softly but firmly. "I love you Isabella Swan, with all of my being."
Her heart healed completely at those words, her so long broken and damaged heart was whole as if nothing were ever wrong with it.
She slowly brought his gaze back to hers as she answered. "You are my life, my heart, my soul and it is only you whom I will love until the universe itself does not exist. I love you too Edward Masen Cullen." And she smiled her first true smile, brilliant and blinding as Edwards face took on one of shock.
A/N: Bella, Edward, and all recognizable characters belong to Mrs. Meyer. The rest to me. I hope you enjoyed it, and I am glad to be writing again. Review :)