Frasier looked out the window and sighed.

"What's wrong, Mr. Crane?" Daphne asked. "Oop, Frasier. Sorry, I'm just not used to that yet."

"Alright, Daphne," Frasier assured her. "I'm just thinking of buying a new condo."

"And you don't consult me?" his father, Martin, asked from his chair. "You know I live here? I'm not dead yet."

Eddie the dog barked and wagged his tail.

"This place is too small!" Frasier whined. "I say we get a large penthouse with room for buffet tables, with a maudlin ambiance."

"That's right, you just throw those big words around."

The doorbell rang.

"Ooh, that must be Niles," Daphne said wistfully. "We're going on a date, you see?"

"And why would he ring the door bell instead of using his key?"

"Well, my psychic senses are telling me that a man is at the door."

Frasier scoffed and Daphne opened the door.

A woman stood in the doorway. She was wearing a slender black dress and matching stilettos and purse, and had short blond hair. She had make-up on, including crimson lipstick on her small lips.

She couldn't have been older than her thirties, and that's a stretch.

"Hi, Mom," the woman said.

Daphne's jaw dropped. She asked, "Who are you, Miss? ...Your mother?"

Frasier ran t the door and shook hands with the woman, introducing himself.

"Frasier Crane," the woman mused. "You mean, that guy on the radio?"

"Precisely!"

"Am I that old-looking?" Daphne shrieked. "I can't be that much older than you!"

"I thought you might be my new step-mother," the woman confessed. "My father told me he was engaged to a much younger woman."

"A trophy wife?" Daphne chuckled. "Me? You're such a kind dear."

"So I'm guessing this isn't where the party is?"

"Of course not," Frasier said warmly. "Looks like you have the wrong place. Allow me to take the liberty of walking you to your father. What's his name? Maybe I know him."

"He doesn't live here, though... Um, the party is a welcoming party for his friends, if that helps."

"Yes! The Jeffersons recently moved here!" Martin announced. "I was invited, but I have a date tonight. With a very beautiful woman."

"The Jeffersons," Frasier informed the woman, "live downstairs. Of course, the children three floors down are having a birthday party."

"It's a welcoming party," the woman assured him.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Frasier's just mad because the new neighbour doesn't like him," Martin said. "He called Frasier a sissy!"

"Thank you, Dad," Frasier grumbled. "Let me walk you to the party, Miss...?"

"Harriet," the said, bowing.

"Harriet. Such a lovely name."

Frasier held up her hand and kissed it. Harriet returned with a smile. And pulled a napkin out of her purse and wiped her hand. The two left and Daphne closed the door.

"Oh my," Daphne said to Martin. "I have a date with Niles, you have a date, and now Frasier has a date. All that's left it Eddie."

"Maybe another day you'll get lucky," Martin said to Eddie as he patted him.

"Who are you going on a date with anyway?"

"A feisty Italian woman. She's a little older, but she's got a spark!"

"That's wonderful."

"Yeah. And she says she has a daughter who is desperate, so I'm hoping Frasier's new date doesn't end well so we can do double dates."

"Oh, Martin!" Daphne snapped. "Not nice."

Frasier and Harriet exited the elevator and walked to the Jefferson's door. Harriet knocked.

"So, this is it. The party," Frasier said nervously. "I should go now."

"No, come and enjoy the party," Harriet said flirtatiously. "You can be my date."

"I wasn't really invited... But you can give me your number-"

A short black man with gumption and a khaki suit opened the door. He yelled, "Harriet, so good to see you!"

"Hello, Mr. Jefferson!" Harriet said warmly. He let her in.

"And the sissy," Mr. Jefferson said to Frasier.

"Let him in, please?" Harriet begged. "He's my date."

Frasier blushed.

"HIM? A date?" Mr Jefferson looked shocked. But then he chuckled.

"He's straight," Harriet assured him.

"Alright, come in," he said to Frasier.

Mr. Jefferson left the two to talk for a few minutes. They found out they shared a taste in music, but not in art. They shared the ideal retirement, but not pies. They shared the same taste in slippers and cameras.

"I'm going to have a cigarette and then go look for my dad," Harriet told him. "Want to come?"

"That's alright, I don't smoke."

"Eh, suit yourself."

She winked and walked to the balcony.

"Nice woman, eh?" Mr. Jefferson said. He appeared behind Frasier.

Frasier turned to him and said, "Yes, quite. Harriet is a handsome and sophisticated woman."

"Just don't you go and touch her!"

"Excuse me?"

"I don't want my best friend's daughter getting knocked up and pregnant and stuck with a man-woman!"

"How dare you?" Frasier snapped. When he noticed a few people stare at them, he turned straight-faced and reserved.

"You heard me!"
"George!" A large black woman with a beehive turned up at the sidelines and glared at him.

"Wheezy!" Mr. Jefferson whined. "Come on! You can't expect Harry's daughter to date some no-good, uninvited sissy?"

"I understand your concern," Frasier said in a neutral voice. "You worry about Harriet ending up with a loser."

"That's what I just said, dummy!"

"I can assure you that I am a well-respected radio personality. That, Harriet and I are only friends."

That's good, he thought. If he went around calling someone his date or girlfriend, there could be an unfortunate circumstance where she denies it. Oh, the humiliation, again!

"Where's your father?" Mr. Jafferson scoffed. "Now that's a guy you want to have at a party!"

A few people nodded.

Jefferson turned to Wheezy and said, "Come on, sweetie; let's go enjoy the party. Away from this riff-raff."

"Riff-raff!" Frasier scoffed. A sudden lapse in judgement led him to push Mr. Jefferson.

"How dare you!" Mr. Jefferson snapped. "Florence, fight him!"

"I'm on break! It's a party!" a voice called back.

"George!" Wheezy snapped, hitting George on the shoulder. "Don't ask Florence to fight him! You fight your own battles."

"What?" Frasier gasped.

"Get that trouble-maker, sweetie."

"You should learn how to treat the host with respect!" George announced, pulling two swords off the display on the wall. "And you should learn that Harriet is too good for you!"

He handed a sword to Frasier. Everyone moved away from the two.

BOSS BATTLE!

Frasier Crane VS George Jefferson

"Prepare to lose!" Frasier said.

"Harriet's too good for you," George said. "I'm not gonna let her date someone from a show from the nineties! Shows during that time are nowhere near as good a quality as earlier shows."

"I'm..." -Frasier held up his sword- "From..." -He aimed his blade at George Jefferson's head- "Cheers!"

The two ran at each other, ready to

FIGHT!