Once upon a time, young Zak Saturday was walking through a random field. We don't know why or how he got there. As he was walking, a fuzzy hole animal flicked him off! Zak got very angry, named all the Pokemon, (Chuck Norris taught him, but this isn't related that story) and chased the fuzzy animal. The fuzzy animal went down a large hole, and so did Zak. Zak fell and fell and fell for what seemed like hours.
Finally, he reached the bottom of the hole. But he couldn't see that nasty fuzzy animal. He got up and looked around. Everything was so HUGE! "I must have shrank." He said. He saw some person walking by. He looked like Mama Luigi. "I just wonder what Ganon's up to." Zak spun around to see… THE YOUTUBE POOP LINK! Zak turned to run, but there was THE KING (Youtube poop)! He turned where they weren't but… THERE WAS IMPA! He turned the last direction he had. But still… ZELDA! He had nowhere to run. He had no idea why he was so scared of them… he just felt like they were evil. If only he had known that subscribing to either Deepercutt, WalrusGuy, Captpan6, or KroboProductions warded off evil. But there were many things he could have done to ward off evil, too. Like taking pictures at night, rating JeepersMedia videos 5 stars, eating celebrities, things like that. But now I'm rambling about warding off evil.
Zak regretted not subscribing to WalrusGuy. He hung his head in shame. But his head shot up when he heard "Squadalah!" above him. Now he was surrounded, with evil CD-I characters closing in on him. He looked up and saw Squadalah Man drop a COOKIE! Zak caught it and ate it. He grew until his head hit the ceiling, crushing Squadalah Man. He kicked over The King, Link, Zelda, and Impa. He picked up the Tri-Force of wisdom, and courage, and ran through a convenient door that wasn't there a second ago.
Soon, he saw Ganon. He threw Ganon into the Pit. "IT BURNS!" Zak ran on. He opened the door, and stepped into Hello Kitty Land. He simply kicked over the little Hello Kitty Chibis. Nothing really.
He finally got into the room where that disrespectful fuzzy animal was. IT WAS HOLDING HIS PARENTS HOSTAGE! To make matters worse, he was flicking off his parents, quoting Youtube Poop. Zak took out a machine gun, and shot it dead. Forgetting his parents, he opened the last door. "NO, ZAK, DON'T!" Koizumi, the blonde author screamed while falling out of the sky. But it was too late.
Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley began to play. Zak had been Rick Rolled. "NOOOOO! I SHOULD HAVE SUBSCRIBED!" Zak dissolved into thin air, taking the poor, innocent author with him. "I SUBSCRIBED, WHY DIDN'T YOU!" Were the poor girl's last words. Zak's parents watched in horror. Poor, poor Koizumi.
R.I.P| Koizumi Michiyo (not really)| Zak Saturday (not really)|
The moral of the story is to Subscribe to the famous Youtube Poopers, and to beware of Rick Rolling.