A/N: This was written for the Christmas challenge at DI last year. Just thought I'd share it with you guys. Happy holidays!
Mr. and Mrs. Claus
It was Friday night and Martha had just informed Clark that she had invited Lois to stay at the farm for Christmas break. Great! he thought, sighing.
"I guess that means I'll be sleeping on the couch again!"
A knock on the door interrupted him. Before he could get up to answer it, the door swung open, letting a drift of cold air into the kitchen.
"Merry Christmas!"
"Speak of the devil…" Clark mumbled to himself.
Lois turned to him, smirking.
"Happy to see me, Smallville?"
"Delirious."
She chuckled.
"Merry Christmas, Lois," Martha said, hugging the young woman. "I'm glad you came."
"Thank you for inviting me, Mrs. Kent. That's very kind of you."
"It's my pleasure. Clark's friends are always welcome here, especially during the holidays."
Clark's eyebrows shot to his hair line. Lois was many things, but she certainly wasn't his friend!
"Sweetie, why don't you help Lois with her bags and show her to your room?"
"It's OK, I can find my way through the house."
"I'm sure you can, Lois, but I can manage to carry your bags upstairs. Why did you bring so many clothes, by the way? How long are you planning on staying this time?"
"A week, why? Tired of me already?" she teased.
"I'll probably be tired after sleeping a week on the couch, that's for sure."
She rolled her eyes.
"I haven't been here for five minutes and already you're complaining! I've slept on army cots, so I have no problem taking the couch if you think you can't handle it."
"Don't be ridiculous. Of course you can have my bed, Lois. Besides, my mom would kill me if I didn't lend it to you."
"You're right about that!"
Clark put her bags next to the bed and shoved his hands down his pockets.
"Huh, Lois…"
"Yes?"
"There's something I'd like to ask you."
She looked at him, curious.
"Alright, shoot."
"I'm volunteering to go visit sick children at the hospital on Christmas and distribute gifts to them."
"Wow. I'm impressed, Smallville. I didn't know you had it in you."
"Thanks. The reason I'm telling you this is because I asked Chloe to come with me but she has the flu."
"I know. I talked to her this morning. Poor thing is stuck in bed with a fever."
"So… hum… would you like to come?"
"Gee! A minute ago, it sounded like you couldn't wait to get rid of me and now you're saying you actually want my company?" she said sarcastically.
"It's for the kids, Lois. And I'm sure Chloe's costume would fit you."
"Wait. Costume? It's Christmas, not Halloween!"
"Well, since I'll be dressing up as Santa, I thought you could go as Santa's little helper," he grinned.
She shook her head.
"Forget it! There's no way in hell I'm dressing up as an elf!"
"Fine. But the only costume left is, well… Mrs. Claus. The choice is yours, Lois."
"OK, I'll do it," she said under her breath.
With his super hearing, Clark heard her perfectly but he pretended that he didn't just for the fun of it.
"Did you say something, Lois?"
"I said I'll do it! But only because I don't wanna disappoint the children."
He flashed her that famous Kent smile.
"Great!"
The next day was December 24th. Every year on Christmas Eve, the Kent tradition had Jonathan taking his son into the woods to search for the perfect tree. But this year, because of his heart troubles, he asked Clark to take Lois with him instead.
"Lois?" he repeated, shocked.
"Why not? It would be nice of you to spend time with her," Martha added. "She must be feeling a bit lonely, with her father and sister still in Europe and her mother gone. The only family she has left is Chloe."
"You're right, mom."
It was close to ten o'clock when Lois came down the stairs in her pajamas and her bunny slippers. Clark was alone in the kitchen, reading the newspaper.
"Good morning, Smallville."
"Good morning, Lois."
"Where's the rest of the clan?"
"My parents are doing some last minute shopping."
She poured herself a cup of coffee.
"So, got any plans for today?"
"As a matter of fact, yes. Would you like to join me?"
She raised an eyebrow.
"You requested my company twice now. Should I take this as a compliment?" she joked.
"I'm just being a polite host, that's all."
"Oh, goody! You sure know how to make a girl feel welcome, farmboy."
"You wanna come or not?"
"Depends on where you're going."
"To pick out a Christmas tree."
"Sounds like fun."
"I was gonna leave soon. Can you be ready in half an hour?"
"Sure. I'll take a quick shower first."
"Since when do you take quick showers, Lois?"
"When I want to."
He chuckled.
"Is that so?"
"You don't believe me?"
"No."
"Fine. I'll prove it to you, then. I bet you five dollars that I can be ready in twenty minutes."
"Five dollars? That's it?"
"Ten."
"OK. Deal."
He glanced at his watch.
"Nineteen minutes and counting. You better hurry!"
Lois drank the last sip of her coffee and ran upstairs laughing. She came down wearing a pair of jeans and a light blue blouse with her hair tied into a ponytail. Clark had to admit that she looked great.
"I won! You owe me ten bucks, Smallville."
He smiled.
"Come on, let's go!"
They jumped into his truck and headed for the woods. They walked around in the snow for what seemed like hours.
"How about this one?" Clark asked once again.
"Too short."
"This one?"
"Too tall."
He sighed.
"How about this one over here? Let me guess: too green?"
Lois rolled her eyes, ignored what he had said and continued to look for the perfect tree, leaving Clark to follow in her trail. A few minutes later, she stopped abruptly. Clark almost bumped into her.
"This is the one!" she pointed triumphantly.
"Finally."
He proceeded to cut the tree. Lois insisted on helping him carry it to the truck. She was staring at his butt when she had a flashback of him naked in the cornfield a few months ago. Her cheeks flushed. Hearing Lois' heartbeat accelerate, Clark thought the tree was too heavy for her, even if he was carrying 99 of the weight.
"Is it too hard for you?"
"No, it's perfect the way it is…" she mumbled, daydreaming about his firm butt.
He frowned. What on Earth did she mean by that?
"We can pause for a moment if you want," he said, turning his head to look at her.
She had a weird expression on her face.
"Are you OK, Lois?"
She shook herself mentally when she realized what she was doing. He was a farm boy wearing plaid, how could she find him remotely attractive? This was ridiculous!
"I'm fine! Now quit trying to find an excuse to rest, Smallville. Let's get this tree in the truck. Come on, chop chop!"
They returned to the house. Jonathan and Clark put the tree up in the living room.
"Why don't you kids decorate it?" Martha suggested, exchanging a glance with her husband. "I need Jonathan's help in the kitchen."
"I'd love too, Mrs. Kent! It's the least we can do. Right, Clark?"
"Right. I'll go get the lights and the ornaments."
Lois tried to place the star on the top of the tree but she wasn't quite tall enough to reach it.
"Let me help you with that," Clark said, wrapping his hands around her waist and lifting her slightly.
"Thanks."
They were so close he could smell the intoxicating scent of her perfume.
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
The very next day you gave it away
This year to save on the tears
I'll give it to someone special
Clark put Lois back down on her feet but left his hands on her waist a little longer than necessary.
"You can let go now, Smallville. I can stand on my own."
He removed his hands immediately and took a step back, blushing. What the hell was wrong with him? This was Lois Lane, his best friend's cousin! She was gorgeous, yes, but she was also rude, bossy, not to mention incredibly annoying! How could he be attracted to her?
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
The very next day you gave it away
This year to save on the tears
I'll give it to someone special
The song reminded him of Lana. At this time last year they were in love. Now she was dating a guy she had met in Paris over the summer. Jason Teague, his football coach.
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
The very next day you gave it away
This year to save on the tears
I'll give it to someone special
He really thought Lana was the one for him. The girl he was going to marry one day.
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
The very next day you gave it away
This year to save on the tears
I'll give it to someone special
Clearly he had been wrong.
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man undercover but you tore me apart
Now I found the real love, now I found
You'll never fool me again!
What if he was destined to be alone?
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man undercover but you tore me apart
Now I found the real love, now I found
You'll never fool me again!
"So what did you buy me, Smallville? You did get me something right?"
"Of course I did, Lois."
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
The very next day you gave it away
This year to save on the tears
I'll give it to someone special
"Is it big? Fragile? Can I wear it? Please tell me it's not a fur coat! I would never put a dead animal on my back. It's so barbaric! Perfume, perhaps? You know how much I love Chanel #5. No? Well you do now. Oh, I've got it! You bought me imported chocolates! Belgium's finest, mmm…"
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
The very next day you gave it away
This year to save on the tears
I'll give it to someone special
Clark smiled at Lois' tirade. He knew she would try to guess what her gift was.
"Sorry, Lois, that's not it."
Jonathan and Martha came into the living room to admire the tree and announced that dinner was ready. Jonathan carved the turkey like he did each year and they enjoyed the feast that Martha had prepared for them. Chloe was spending the day with her dad. She had called earlier to wish them all a merry Christmas.
After dinner, they listened to Christmas carols and exchanged gifts. Lois had bought Clark a black leather jacket. It was the last thing he was expecting, because that was something more like Kal-El would wear. But he could see she had really made an effort to please him.
"It's fabulous, Lois! But it must've cost you a fortune."
"Don't be silly. I'm glad you like it. And you certainly need the change in wardrobe," she smirked, opening the gift with her name on it.
It was a picture of Lois and her mother. Chloe had found it a few weeks ago while going through old family albums and gave it to Clark, who had it framed.
"Where did you get this?"
Lois was staring at the picture, her eyes glistening with tears.
"I've never even seen this before! Thank you so much, Clark!"
She hugged him tightly.
"Merry Christmas, Lois."
After Jonathan and Martha went to bed, Lois and Clark watched Miracle on 34th street in front of the fireplace, drinking eggnog. Lois fell asleep half way through the movie, her head resting on Clark's shoulder. He put his arm around her and watched the rest of the movie, smiling. That's how Martha and Jonathan found them on Christmas morning, cuddled on the couch, sound asleep. They thought they looked so cute together.
Clark was the first one to wake up. He covered Lois with a blanket and went upstairs to take a shower. When he came back down she was still sleeping. He removed the blanket and poked her in the ribs.
"Rise and shine, sleepyhead!"
Her eyes fluttered open.
"Hmm?"
"Wake up, Lois!"
He shook her shoulder.
"OK, OK!" she grumbled, sitting up.
She definitely wasn't a morning person.
"Here," he said, handing her a cup of coffee.
The delicious aroma and the sweet gesture made her smile.
"We have to be at the hospital before noon. You think you can win another ten dollars?" he teased.
"Very funny, Clarkie."
"Let's put it this way: if you lose, we'll be even."
She tossed him a cushion that he caught by reflex. But his plan worked as Lois was ready in record time. They left shortly after breakfast. Lois insisted on taking her SUV.
"Listen, Smallville. I may have agreed to go to Metropolis with you, but there's no way I'm letting you drive us there."
Clark knew there was no point in arguing with Lois when she had that determined look in her eyes.
"Whatever," he said, shrugging.
She glanced at him, surprised that he wasn't insisting more.
"Well OK, then. It's settled."
They listened to Christmas songs on the radio. Clark was clinging onto the dashboard. Lois was driving way too fast for his taste.
"Don't you think you should slow down a bit before you kill us?"
"What's the matter? Are you afraid? You're such a boy scout! I bet you never went above the speed limit in your life! A little adrenaline rush gets your heart pumping."
"My heart is pumping fine, Lois. And I would like to get to the hospital in one piece, preferably not in an ambulance."
She couldn't help but smile at his comment.
"No need to worry. The weather is great! It's not even snowing!"
"There could be black ice on the road. One false maneuver and we could end up on the side of the road. Did you even think about how the children would feel if Santa never showed up?"
He knew Lois would never refute that argument.
"Alright, fine!" she exclaimed, dropping below the speed limit. "Satisfied?"
He just nodded and smiled, happy about his little victory. They arrived at Metropolis General forty minutes later and were greeted by the doctors and nurses responsible for organizing the event. Lois and Clark then changed into their costume. She examined her red velvet dress in the mirror, placed the white wig on her head and smiled at herself. She wasn't going to win any beauty contest today, that's for sure. But the kids would love it. Clark was waiting for her in front of the doctor's lounge. They stared at each other and burst into laughter.
"You look great, Mrs. Claus."
"And you make a super Santa, Smallville. But there's just one problem."
"What's that?"
"Your beard is crooked. Let me fix it for you."
Lois stood in front of him and replaced the fake beard properly so that the kids wouldn't know it wasn't a real one.
"Thanks, Lois."
"You're welcome."
"Not just for this, but also for coming with me today. It means a lot to me."
She smiled.
"You're doing an amazing thing here, Clark. I'm glad I can help."
"Well what are we waiting for? Let's go spread some joy! Ho! Ho! Ho!"
All afternoon, they went from room to room on the pediatric floor, distributing gifts to the sick children, taking pictures with them and their parents. It was almost five o'clock when they finished. They were tired and hungry, but felt rewarded about their good actions.
"I'm dying for a cup of coffee! How about we stop at the cafeteria before we leave?" Lois suggested.
"Great idea."
They were about to get into the elevator when Clark noticed the mistletoe hanging above their head. He gave Lois a nudge and pointed to the plant with a huge grin on his face.
"Oh! You can't be serious!"
"Hey, it's tradition…"
She rolled her eyes, placed her hands on Clark's broad shoulders, lifted herself on the tip of her toes and kissed him, gently pressing her lips on his. It only lasted an instant, but they both felt something. Like a current had passed between them.
"Merry Christmas, Clark."
"Merry Christmas… Mrs. Claus," he winked.
THE END