Starless Nights
Chapter 1: Regrets
I gazed out of the large bay windows and sighed. How had I gotten myself into this horrible mess!? Tiny, silent tears began to stream down my soft, porcelain face and ruin the make-up that had taken the beautician hours to painstakingly apply. Thoughts of Daddy and Mother and all of the little things I had taken for granted popped into my mind and, like a balloon when a stickpin bursts it, I knew I was giving all of my girlish ideas up. From behind me, came someone clearing their throat, and I lurched around taken by surprise. There, maybe only five feet away, stood my soon to be mother- in-law, Lillian Cutler, staring at me angrily with those steely blue eyes that always seemed to bore into my own eyes like darts.
"Laura Sue!" bellowed out the older woman's cold voice, "What are you crying for, girl!?"
I turned away from her so that I was facing the beautiful bay window and looking down on the huge crowd that had come to attend my wedding. It made me feel like a princess to see all of those people down there waiting, anticipating for me. I took the tissue I was holding and quickly dabbed at the tears strewn across my cheeks. "I'm just so..happy, Mrs. Cutler, that I can't hold back my tears of happiness" I answered and I turned back to her with a fake, yet sweet smile plastered on my face.
I looked into the steel cold eyes of my mother-in-law. Oh, if only it were Bronson standing at the altar waiting for me, my heart cried out. Instead, it was mama's boy, Randolph Cutler, that I would be exchanging vows with. I tried to reassure myself by thinking of the good things that would come out of this marriage. There was just no way that I would let myself love Randolph as much as I truly loved Bronson, but surely Randolph would be able to give me anything my heart desired. He would also be able to give me more love and attention than Bronson could. Sometimes, I wished that he would pay half as much attention to me as he did to his crippled sister. I know it's a horrible thought, but I use to wish she would die so Bronson would come to me for comfort. Of course, now that I was marrying Randolph, that didn't matter anymore. Unless Bronson would declare his undying love for me and then I would divorce Randolph in a heartbeat.
"Quit standing around and get outside!" demanded Lillian Cutler. She had a very angry look on her face that caused me to flinch, "The wedding has begun and you're standing here bawling like a baby! Get down there right now! I forbid you to stain the Cutler family name, Laura Sue! You know that I do not approve of this marriage, but my husband insists that I leave you and Randolph be. I just want you to know that I will be watching you, Laura Sue, and I will report to Randolph anything you do that I don't like."
With that, she turned around and marched out of the room with her head held high. I knew that Lillian didn't like me any more than she liked the town trash, and it made me think that she could see through to what I was really doing. I think she realized that I didn't really want her son; therefore, she treated me with less respect than a prostitute. Somehow, I believed what had been said about tattling on me when I did something wrong. I felt as if I were going to burst into tears at any minute. My head was lowered as I climbed down the long staircase to the first floor. The wedding was to be in the garden and there would be a big reception in the hotel's dining room. Of course, there would be thousands of people watching my every move and the thought of that made me smile in anticipation. I just loved being the center of attention. As I rounded the side of the hotel, I saw Daddy waiting for me, and how his old eyes looked so sad. It made me feel as if I was leaving him forever.
He looked down at me with tears glinting in his eyes and asked, "Are you ready, Princess?"
I wrapped my arm around his and said, "Yes, Daddy, I'm ready."
Chapter 1: Regrets
I gazed out of the large bay windows and sighed. How had I gotten myself into this horrible mess!? Tiny, silent tears began to stream down my soft, porcelain face and ruin the make-up that had taken the beautician hours to painstakingly apply. Thoughts of Daddy and Mother and all of the little things I had taken for granted popped into my mind and, like a balloon when a stickpin bursts it, I knew I was giving all of my girlish ideas up. From behind me, came someone clearing their throat, and I lurched around taken by surprise. There, maybe only five feet away, stood my soon to be mother- in-law, Lillian Cutler, staring at me angrily with those steely blue eyes that always seemed to bore into my own eyes like darts.
"Laura Sue!" bellowed out the older woman's cold voice, "What are you crying for, girl!?"
I turned away from her so that I was facing the beautiful bay window and looking down on the huge crowd that had come to attend my wedding. It made me feel like a princess to see all of those people down there waiting, anticipating for me. I took the tissue I was holding and quickly dabbed at the tears strewn across my cheeks. "I'm just so..happy, Mrs. Cutler, that I can't hold back my tears of happiness" I answered and I turned back to her with a fake, yet sweet smile plastered on my face.
I looked into the steel cold eyes of my mother-in-law. Oh, if only it were Bronson standing at the altar waiting for me, my heart cried out. Instead, it was mama's boy, Randolph Cutler, that I would be exchanging vows with. I tried to reassure myself by thinking of the good things that would come out of this marriage. There was just no way that I would let myself love Randolph as much as I truly loved Bronson, but surely Randolph would be able to give me anything my heart desired. He would also be able to give me more love and attention than Bronson could. Sometimes, I wished that he would pay half as much attention to me as he did to his crippled sister. I know it's a horrible thought, but I use to wish she would die so Bronson would come to me for comfort. Of course, now that I was marrying Randolph, that didn't matter anymore. Unless Bronson would declare his undying love for me and then I would divorce Randolph in a heartbeat.
"Quit standing around and get outside!" demanded Lillian Cutler. She had a very angry look on her face that caused me to flinch, "The wedding has begun and you're standing here bawling like a baby! Get down there right now! I forbid you to stain the Cutler family name, Laura Sue! You know that I do not approve of this marriage, but my husband insists that I leave you and Randolph be. I just want you to know that I will be watching you, Laura Sue, and I will report to Randolph anything you do that I don't like."
With that, she turned around and marched out of the room with her head held high. I knew that Lillian didn't like me any more than she liked the town trash, and it made me think that she could see through to what I was really doing. I think she realized that I didn't really want her son; therefore, she treated me with less respect than a prostitute. Somehow, I believed what had been said about tattling on me when I did something wrong. I felt as if I were going to burst into tears at any minute. My head was lowered as I climbed down the long staircase to the first floor. The wedding was to be in the garden and there would be a big reception in the hotel's dining room. Of course, there would be thousands of people watching my every move and the thought of that made me smile in anticipation. I just loved being the center of attention. As I rounded the side of the hotel, I saw Daddy waiting for me, and how his old eyes looked so sad. It made me feel as if I was leaving him forever.
He looked down at me with tears glinting in his eyes and asked, "Are you ready, Princess?"
I wrapped my arm around his and said, "Yes, Daddy, I'm ready."