Hi, guys! So I've been wanting to write something about Natara & Oscar breaking up, & I'd never done a songfic before, so I decided to give it a try. ^_^ YES, it is 'Walk Away' from High School Musical 3 (judge me), but the song really, really fit with what I wanted this to say. & it was in my head because I may or may not have just watched that movie... & I'm not 100% sure if all the lyrics are right; I used lyric sites, but they said different things. & it's hard to understand by ear. I also realize this is super long. xD Anyways, if you could please review, that would be super awesome! & tell me if I should do more songfics? Enjoy! C:
After a lot of time thinking, Natara Williams knew what she had to do. As much as it would inevitably suck, she needed to break off her engagement with Oscar Santos. She knew she had feelings for Mal Fallon, fellow detective and partner, but to be fair to them both, she needed things over with Oscar. Or as 'over' as you can get after breaking off an engagement.
Sure, she had broken up with guys before, but never an engagement. As a plus, Oscar was... different. The other guys had earned themselves a break-up, doing or saying something carelessly stupid, or repeatedly doing so. But Oscar hadn't earned this. At all. Natara looked down at her hand, with Oscar's engagement ring still on her ring finger. She twisted it around a few times, before sighing and turning on the radio.
I guess I should have known better
To believe that my luck would change
I led my heart on forever
Finally learned each-other's names
The song playing caught her attention, and she registered that she had heard it before. She didn't know where, but she had.
She ran a hand through her silky, dark hair and exhaled deeply, picking up her cell phone.
As much as she loved Oscar, it wasn't the same way she loved Mal. Oscar was a great guy, and any girl would be lucky to have him. But... He wasn't Mal. Natara knew she needed to break up with Oscar now, while she had the courage. Otherwise, she'd back out and end up hurting both him and herself worse in the long-run. She loved him, but she knew she couldn't marry him. Still, though; that didn't make it any easier.
She turned the radio down, nervously dialing Oscar's number.
I tell myself this time is different
No goodbyes, 'cause my eyes can't bear to see it
I'll never survive the one that's comin'
If I stay, oh no!
Oscar's phone rang a few times before she heard him pick up.
"Hey, babe!" Oscar greeted cheerfully. His greeting stung a little, knowing what she was about to do to him. He was blissfully unaware of the upcoming status of his heart.
"Hey," Natara answered nervously, "Can you meet me at the park in 20?"
"Sure," he replied, "Are you okay?"
She swallowed a lump forming in her throat, threatening to break her voice. "Yeah, I just wanna talk."
"I'll see you soon," he said. She heard car keys jingling in the background. "I love you."
Natara could 't bring herself to say 'I love you' back if she was going to do what she had planned. So she just bit her lip and hung up.
God, she groaned to herself. This is going to be harder than I thought.
Just walk away, oh
And don't look back
'Cause if my heart breaks,
It's gonna hurt so bad
As hard as it was going to be to break the engagement with Oscar, she needed to walk away now. The longer she waited, the more it would hurt them both in retrospect.
You know I'm strong,
But I can't take that
Before it's too late
Oh, just walk away
Natara was momentarily startled at how accurately the song playing fit with tonight; then she remembered the grim task at hand. She re-touched her make-up and threw on a coat. The park was only ten minutes away; she would walk. She touched the engagement ring one last time, biting her lip to keep from crying before she even got there. She still heard the song playing from the other room.
I really wish I could blame you
But I know that it's no one's fault
A Cinderella with no shoe
And the Prince that doesn't know he's lost
She leaned against the doorframe and exhaled before pushing herself up and out the door.
The evening air was cool, and she shivered, hugging the coat to her body. The sun had almost set, casting an eerie purple-ish glow over everything. The moon illuminated the sky, sending streaks of faded light down to Earth.
Natara got there before Oscar, so she sat down on a bench and let her thoughts wander. She suddenly remembered the lyrics to the song she heard playing. They seemed to come right to her.
This emptiness is so familiar
Each goodbye with just
The same old song
But this time I will not surrender
Cause I'm gone, no, no!
The chorus ran through her mind again, serving as a stinging reminder of what she was about to do.
Soon enough, she could see a silhouette walking toward her. As it walked closer, she knew who it was. His handsome face was illuminated in the soft moonlight. He smiled when he saw her, quickening his pace. Something about that moment and the lyrics running through her head stung. She felt the lump in her throat get bigger, and tears began to fall silently from her pretty brown eyes.
Oscar walked up and immediately saw her crying.
"Hey, Nat, what did you- are you okay? What's wrong?" he sat down beside her, putting his arm around her.
She wanted desperately to accept his comfort, but she knew she couldn't. She gently pushed his arm away and looked down, tears burning her eyes and soundlessly spilling over.
"Natara," Oscar said quietly, "What's wrong?"
"I... I'm sorry." she stammered, fighting to collect herself long enough to speak semi-intelligible words.
"Sorry for what?" he asked, reaching up to wipe tears off her face. She didn't object to this, briefly hesitating.
"Just... here me out, alright? I just... Please don't say anything until I finish." She took a shaky breath in, readying herself.
Oscar nodded, staring right into her eyes.
"Oscar... I... I..." She broke down crying. She didn't even know how to start. She allowed a few sobs to escape before collecting herself. Oscar gently ran his fingertips up and down Natara's arm, attempting to offer silent comfort. While the action itself was soothing, his blissful unawareness upset her more in the end.
She drew in another shaky breath. "Oscar, I... I can't do this anymore. I love you so much; I really do. But it's... it's not... Oscar, I don't want to hide my feelings from you more than I already have. It's not fair to you, or anyone. I... As much as I love and care about you, I..." She didn't know how to finish, her words weren't cooperating. This only served in further frustrating her, producing more tears.
Oscar was quiet for a moment. "Is it Mal?" he asked simply and quietly, drawing his hand away from Natara's trembling arm.
Natara let out a small sob, wiping tears from her eyes. She just nodded, and made the mistake of looking into his eyes. Hurt was clearly registered there, penetrating deeply. He looked away, staring at a leaf on the ground, before looking up and weakly meeting her gaze.
"I... What did I do? What... went wrong?" Hurt filled his voice, and he couldn't bring himself to look her in the eye anymore.
"I'm so sorry," Natara choked, her voice coming out higher and more child-like than personally desirable. "I'm so, so sorry. Just... Please know that it's nothing you did or didn't do. Nothing went wrong. You're an amazing guy, and anyone would be lucky to have you."
She paused, gently lifting his chin and forcing him to look at her. Now now only was their hurt in his gaze, but also confusion.
"Please look at me." She wiped more tears onto her coat sleeve, struggling to not completely lose it, and also steeling herself for the horribly cliche phrase she was about to utter. She just didn't know how to put it.
"Oscar, you're an amazing Romeo, and you're going to find your perfect Juliet some day. I know you will. But..." She stopped, gently sliding the engagement ring off of her finger, fighting hard not to break down.
"But I'm... I'm not your Juliet, Oscar." She gently took Oscar's hand and placed the ring inside it, gingerly curling his fingers around it. He looked down and stared at it, tears filling his eyes.
"Damn it, Natara," he whispered softly, several tears rolling down his face. This hurt even worse, considering Natara had never seen him cry before. She winced and bit her lip, looking away briefly.
"I'm so sorry." she added, the words barely coming out between sparsely-stifled sobs. "I'm sorry that I wasted your time. I'm sorry I suck at being a girlfriend. I'm sorry I canceled so many of our plans. I'm sorry I have to do this to you right now. And I'm sorry that I'm just a damn idiot in general. But most of all, I'm just sorry it had to end this way. I'm just... I'm sorry. You deserve someone better."
Oscar looked away; anywhere but Natara's eyes. He finally looked up. "But I... I want you, Nat. I'm not perfect either."
Natara just looked helplessly into his eyes, tears still falling down her face. "I'm so sorry," she whispered for the umpteenth time.
"I just... I want you to know that you weren't a waste of my time. And you're not an idiot. I don't regret anything. Getting my heart broken really sucks, but if I really love you... I guess I have to let you go. I'm sorry, too."
She appreciated his understanding, but that made it hurt more, if anything.
"I'm so sorry," she choked again. It was becoming increasingly evident that her working vocabulary had been completely reduced to three words.
Oscar stood, shoving the ring in his pocket.
"I... I guess this is goodbye," he said simply, fighting for his own voice. He pulled her in for one last hug, breathing in the scent of her perfume that he had grown to love. Natara hugged him back, fighting hard for emotional control.
He pulled back, and looked her sadly in the eyes. "I'll miss you, and I hope you find your Romeo." he said simply before turning and walking away from her.
She wanted to call out. To stop him. To make him come back. But it was too late. The damage had been done. She turned the other way, walking back towards home, fresh tears blurring her vision and making it difficult to see.
I've got to let it go, oh
Start protecting my heart and soul
'Cause I don't think I'll survive a goodbye again,
Not again!
Just walk away and don't look back
'Cause if my heart breaks it's gonna hurt so bad
The bridge and chorus of the song ran through her head. She struggled to hold it together until she was inside.
Once inside, she slammed the door and collapsed on the couch bawling, her shoulders shaking with emotion. It wasn't so much that it hurt to end the relationship and not be with him, though that was going to take some getting used to. It was more guilt than anything. Saying she felt absolutely horrible was an understatement. Oscar definitely deserved better. She kept crying, unable to stop the tears, until she eventually cried herself out and fell asleep.