Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki or any of the characters. That honor belongs to Minekura Kazuya.
Hakkai looked around the kitchen for the third time in ten minutes. Brushing minuscule crumbs off of the white smock he wore, he double checked the table settings. The plates were set on the table nicely, the silverware shined as best as Hakkai could get them. The spoons had a flower design on the handles and the handles of the forks were square and had little raised geometric designs on them and the knives were dull and didn't match either the spoons or the forks. How one could dull a butter knife was beyond Hakkai but after living with Gojyo all this time, nothing surprised him anymore. A table cloth covered the scarred table. He had found it at a little secondhand store in the village and thought it would look good with the curtains that he had picked out a month before. The smells from the pot simmering on the stove made his stomach growl again. The clock chimed seven times and Hakkai fussed with the tableware again. One plate had a tiny chip in it but at least all the plates matched.
The kerchief on his head slipped forward a bit and Hakkai fussed with it, untying and retying the knot at the nap of his neck until the kerchief sat just right on his head again. Gojyo always teased him when he wore this outfit, telling him he looked like an anime character from a show that they both liked to watch. The character was a lot like himself, Hakkai supposed. The anime character wore glasses and while Hakkai mostly wore a monocle sometimes when his eyes got really tired, he put on his old glasses. They both cooked very well, were friends with another man with whom they had a relationship in which they depended on each other and both Hakkai and this man was bossed around by a selfish person who only thought of themselves. Except in Hakkai's case, the selfish person was a blond monk and the man's person was a beautiful black haired witch. Hakkai had wryly told Gojyo that he was sure Gojyo would prefer to be bossed around by the witch than the monk. Gojyo had just laughed.
Hakkai heard the sound of the key in the lock. Gojyo was home from the bar. He had promised Hakkai that he would only play a few hands of cards and not get drunk and Gojyo had kept his promise. Butterflies landed in Hakkai's stomach and made their home. Lately whenever Hakkai had heard Gojyo's voice or felt his presence, these tiny butterflies came soaring back to him, flittering and spinning in his belly. Trying to ignore the fluttering in his body, Hakkai lit two fat candles on the table and turned out the light in the kitchen.
"I'm back." Gojyo's voice rang out in the tiny kitchen. Kicking off his shoes, shoving them next to Hakkai's, Gojyo stopped short when he took in the sight of his kitchen. It looked nice. Blinking in wonder at the sight of what Hakkai had been up to while he was out, Gojyo saw that there was a tablecloth covering the ugly table that Banri had bought. Two fat candles burned brightly in the middle of the table, their scent faint but pleasant. The floor was swept and shining in the soft light of the candles, the scuffs and scars left by the previous owners almost invisible now.
A strange feeling came over him as he wandered all the way into the kitchen. Home. His little box house had become a home. He couldn't meet Hakkai's face as he shoved his keys in his jeans pocket. So many times, Gojyo wanted to thank Hakkai for all he did around the house. How he took the time to dig up a space around back and planted a tiny garden, putting up a little fence of chicken wire to keep the rabbits out, lugging the water can from the kitchen to the garden when it was so hot out that it was an effort sometimes just to breathe.
Gojyo could still remember the smile on Hakkai's face when he picked the very first carrot he had ever grown. Hakkai had brought it into the kitchen and washed it thoroughly, all the time telling Gojyo what he went through to bring this little, twisted carrot to maturity. He offered Gojyo the first bite of the carrot and although carrots weren't his favorite, he couldn't say no to that smile. Putting his hand over Hakkai's hand, Gojyo brought the carrot up to his mouth and took a bite.
Hakkai's face had turned bright red and he began talking fast to cover his embarrassment, much to Gojyo's amusement. That's when Gojyo knew he would move heaven and earth to convince Hakkai to stay with him forever.
"Are you hungry?" Hakkai's soft voice broke through Gojyo's thoughts. "I made your favorite. Stew with lots of vegetables and chunks of that cut of meat that's your favorite." Say something, please Gojyo. "There's fresh bread that I baked today. I know how you like to dunk your bread into the stew." A sizzle from one of the candles caught Hakkai's attention and he blushed a bit. Foolishness, he chided himself. A stupid last minute thought of how nice it would be to eat and not have to see the cracks in the plaster of the walls or that brown stain on the ceiling above the stove where water had leaked in a few months ago. Candle light made things so pretty and Hakkai desperately wanted to do this for Gojyo. Show him that things didn't have to be harsh and cold all the time. Even though this house had no pictures on the walls and the curtains were faded and threadbare, it could be a home.
Choking back a laugh when he saw how Hakkai was dressed, Gojyo answered Hakkai. "Yeah, I am really hungry." He sat down at the table, his heart pounding for some strange reason that he didn't understand. Banri sure as hell never did anything like this for him. Hell, Gojyo was lucky that Banri didn't eat everything in the goddamn kitchen, leaving Gojyo nothing but some watered down soup for dinner. "It smells great, Hakkai." A knife clinked against a spoon as Gojyo fiddled with it, his fingers needing something to do other than smoke another cigarette. Hakkai didn't like it when he smoked before dinner.
Reaching up, Hakkai opened the upper cupboard and got out two bowls. They matched the plates which for some odd reason made Hakkai happy. He was so happy these days and he never thought too much about it for fear that he wouldn't be able to reason why. Or maybe he didn't think too hard about the why because he was afraid to find out why.
Spooning out the thick stew, Hakkai leaned over Gojyo, setting the bowl down in the center of the plate. Gojyo's antennae tickled Hakkai's chin and Hakkai pulled back quickly, the bowl landing with a clank on the plate. "Oh, sorry Gojyo." Gojyo went to move the bowl off of the plate but Hakkai's soft voice stopped his hand where it was. "Don't. I...I still have to dish out the bread." Taking a deep breath, Hakkai caught the scent of Gojyo. Who would have thought that the smell of beer, stale cigarette smoke and leather could be so seductive to his senses?
Turning on his heel, going to the counter, Hakkai took a deep breath to steady his nerves. This was crazy! It's just Gojyo, he told himself. You've served him dinner lots of times so why are you getting flustered now? Grabbing the bread knife from the wood block, Hakkai cut off two pieces of bread and took them back over to the table.
"Here." He set the bread down, one piece on either side of the bowl of stew and stepped back. This time, Hakkai deliberately let his chin brush against Gojyo's antennae. He was sure Gojyo didn't notice a thing.
What the hell was this? Twice now, Hakkai got so close to him that Gojyo could smell the soap Hakkai used and he had to stop himself from taking a deep breath every time the man came within two feet of him. Not only was Hakkai close, he was deliberately touching his chin to those damn hairs that stood up. Never once had Hakkai called them antennae like Sanzo and Goku did and Gojyo lov… He caught that word in his mind and smashed it into a little ball and threw it away. He liked that about Hakkai. Yeah. LIKED. A lot.
Gojyo watched as Hakkai's delicate, almost feminine hands laid the bread down, just so, on his plate. Dammit! It's just Hakkai. The scent of soap fled as Hakkai went back to the pot simmering on the stove and Gojyo mentally shook himself, watching Hakkai dish himself up a bowl of stew.
A drop of the thick stew landed on Hakkai's index finger and he almost groaned as Hakkai put the tip of his finger in his mouth and sucked the broth off. It's just Hakkai, he told himself again but his brain was in another dimension by now. Either that or he was drunk and still at the bar having some sort of weird fantasy about his roommate.
Gojyo knocked that thought out of his head. He only had one beer before the need to be home swarmed over him. It wasn't that he was worried that Hakkai was in danger or hurt but a little thought kept popping up in his head. Hakkai was lonely. The guy would never admit it out loud to Gojyo or anyone else for that matter but years of playing cards and watching people try to hide their reactions to the hands they had made Gojyo a sort of expert on body language. Hakkai's body language screamed to Gojyo, Stay with me. Keep me company during the long days. I need you. So, Gojyo told himself he was just being a good friend and coming home sooner and not going out as much. Yeah, that was it. He was a damned good friend.
A bowl of stew in one hand and two pieces of bread in the other, Hakkai sat down at the table. "Um, how come you got candles lit?" Gojyo slurped his stew, wincing inside as he watched the graceful way Hakkai sipped his stew, making Gojyo feel like a total clod. The way Hakkai ate his meals, he'd be at home at a fancy restaurant anywhere in the world. Spooning up a bit of meat and vegetables, Hakkai passed the underside of the spoon across the lip of the bowl that was furthest from him and brought it to his mouth. Not one drop escaped from the spoon, not one bit of the broth dribbled from Hakkai's well shaped lips and Gojyo couldn't hear a sound as the spoon exited Hakkai's mouth, all traces of the stew cleaned off the spoon.
Hakkai either didn't notice the slurps coming from Gojyo or he was too polite to mention it. "Do you know the date today, Gojyo?" Another spoonful of stew, another chance for Gojyo to watch the gentle movements of Hakkai's throat as he swallowed.
The date? Uh, it was um... "It's Thursday, right?" Tearing off a chunk of bread, Gojyo dipped it in the stew. The bread, baked to perfection to a light golden brown, soaked up the broth and Gojyo brought it to his mouth. Shit! Two fat drops of broth landed on the tablecloth in front of him. Couldn't he do anything right?
Hakkai graced Gojyo with a broad grin. "Yes, it's Thursday, Gojyo." Green eyes met red ones, the flickering of the candles making the red eyes less harsh and the green ones more liquid. "It's been one year since you found me."
Oh, yeah. One year. One year since he'd picked up Hakkai in the rain and saved his life. One year since his seedy little house had been transformed into something resembling what Gojyo had been searching for all his life. A home and someone there waiting for him.
"Happy anniversary, Gojyo."
The hopeful tone in Hakkai's voice and the way he was looking at Gojyo did funny things to Gojyo's stomach. Hakkai looked like he wanted to say more, a lot more but he was holding his thoughts close to his chest, not letting Gojyo get more than a peek at what the guy was really saying.
Sitting there, in his white smock and kerchief, Hakkai looked like he belonged here. One year ago, people told Gojyo he was fucking nuts to bring a stranger into his house. Who knew what he did to get hurt like that, they told him. Is he on the run from someone, they would ask. Gojyo would just shrug his shoulders and tell them to mind their own business. You're fucked up in the head, they would respond before sneering at him and walking away.
Aw, hell. Maybe he was fucked up in the head but look what happened since he brought Hakkai here. They met Sanzo and Goku which wasn't always fun and games but from the jobs Sanzo tossed their way, they had some extra money and didn't have to rely on Gojyo's expertise in cards to make ends meet. Yeah, Goku cleaned out the fridge every time he came here and Sanzo loved to glare at Gojyo when Gojyo said something less than brilliant but all in all, they weren't a bad bunch to be around.
Hakkai had given Gojyo his childhood dream. Someone to come home to. Someone who cared enough about him to make sure his socks were darned when his big toe poked out of the end. Someone who made his favorite foods and stocked his favorite beer. Someone who gave a damn about him and wanted to see him be happy. He relaxed and grinned at Hakkai.
"Happy anniversary, Hakkai."