A/N: Hey guys, a bunch of you follow my story "Savior", but I'm currently unable to update it. My depression is getting so much worse than it was previously and I relapsed with cutting and my life is kinda just falling apart, you know? I've been getting panic attacks three or more times a day since like October. My anxiety was always bad but it's just sky-rocketing in the past five months. I honestly got writers block on 'Savior' because I got the idea for this story. Literally when one idea comes to me I have to write it or else nothing else will come out in the slightest bit adequate. Enjoy, I hope. Oh, I don't own Annabeth, she belongs to Rick Riordon. I don't own Beauty from Pain, Superchick owns that amazing song. And the 'everybody dies but not everybody lives' line belongs to Drake and Nicki Minaj.
Beauty From Pain
by Superchick
The lights go out all around me,
One last candle to keep out the night.
And then the darkness surrounds me.
Annabeth flicked the lights off, not wanting to be reminded of the blood rushing down her arm.
I know I'm alive but I feel like I've died.
'Everybody dies but not everybody lives,' she thinks bitterly.
And all that's left is to accept that it's over.
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made.
I try to keep warm but I just grow colder,
I feel like I'm slipping away.
She doesn't know what happened to the ten year old Annabeth.
The one that wanted to be an architect.
The one who knew who she was.
After all this has passed,
I still will remain.
After I've cried my last,
There'll be beauty from pain.
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again.
And there'll be beauty from pain,
You will bring beauty from my pain.
All hope isn't gone though.
The old Annabeth isn't completely gone yet,
All those causing torment in her life…
They'll be the reason that her pain was romanticized.
"Tragically beautiful", as if those words could ever go together.
My whole world is the pain inside me.
The best I can do is just get through the day.
She walks, breathes, talks, lives.
All depression, self-hate, anxiety.
Suicide.
When life before is only a memory.
I'll wonder why God lets me walk through this place.
She thinks of how great it must be to die.
Because God gave up on her, He stopped caring about her long ago.
And though I can't understand why this happened,
I know that I will when I look back someday.
She suddenly thinks of her parents.
Her loving parents, trying to help her, to the best of their abilities.
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes.
And made me as gold purified through this place.
Annabeth realizes that she was wrong.
Yes,
Annabeth Chase was wrong.
After all this has passed,
I still will remain.
After I've cried my last,
There'll be beauty from pain.
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again.
And there'll be beauty from pain,
You will bring beauty from my pain.
The knife is brought back up to her already bloody wrist; she can't tell what is her skin anymore.
One slice turns to two, two to three, three to four.
Here I am, at the end of me,
Trying to hold to what I can't see.
I forgot how to hope,
This night's been so long.
The knife is dropped.
Sobs wrack her small frame uncontrollably, desperately clutching her arm.
Regrets flash across her mind,
Over
And over
And over again.
I cling to your promise,
There will be a dawn.
She lookup to the sky, as if there's something in her dark ceiling.
Light shining from the window illuminate her tear-stained cheeks and grey eyes,
As if giving sign of an omen.
After all this has passed,
I still will remain.
After I've cried my last,
There'll be beauty from pain.
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again.
She nods her head to herself,
Getting up to clean her arm.
She won't give up now. She'll fight, even if it ends up killing her.
And there'll be beauty from pain,
You will bring beauty from my pain.
Annabeth will save herself.
A/N: Wow….this was totally a different ending than I envisioned for this. Anyways, there'll be an update for 'Savior' soon-ish (I hope). Review, pretty please? I swear the reviews left from people on this site are honestly the only things that put smiles on my face anymore. Until next time, bye.
"Live for today, laugh for the moment, love forever."