Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own anything.
You stand in line waiting to be handed your diploma, and you get this strange feeling of déjà vu. Logan waves at you and you turn away quickly, because for a moment you imagined his hair was dark and his face was slightly thinner.
You imagined he was Jess.
Your mom waves at you from her seat and you smile. The same feeling of déjà vu washes over you, and suddenly you're seventeen again, waiting to graduate from Chilton. Your eyes scan the crowd, and you silently hope to see Jess. He's not there, and honestly you aren't surprised. He's always been one for disappointment.
The announcer calls your name and you're suddenly snapped back to reality. Paris smiles at you from the other side as you make your way slowly onto the stage. You find yourself once again scanning the crowd for Jess, but of course with no avail. If he wasn't there four years ago, what would make him come now? Your mom cries as you accept the diploma, and you begin to as well. Your reason is different from her reason, but you feel no need to express that.
After the ceremony, you know what you have to do. You can't marry Logan because you wish he was Jess. You don't tell him this, because you don't want to hurt him. A part of you did love him, but a bigger part of you has always loved Jess. You hand the blue velvet box back to him, and watch as he walks out of your life forever.
You then turn to your mom and tell her there's something you have to do, and she asks no questions. You believe this is because she already knows the answers. You walk away quickly and get in your car and drive, doing fifteen miles over the speed limit.
You never speed.
Adrenaline is pulsing through your veins, partially because you're afraid of getting caught, and partially because you're about to see him again.
You pull up to the bookstore, hoping he is there, but of course he's not. That would make it too easy, and with Jess it's never been easy. Some of his friends give you his address, and you take off, driving even faster than you were before. His apartment is five miles away, and you get there in less than three minutes. Your heart is beating madly as you run up three flights of stairs. You knock loudly on the door, and barely have time to catch your breath before Jess opens it. He has changed quite a bit since the last time you saw him, but there's still a glimmer of the Jess you used to know.
"Rory?" he asks, like he's afraid he'll wake up and it will all be a dream. His voice is enough to break you, and tears come flooding down your face. He hugs you gently to his body, and you're a perfect fit, just like you always were. You try to tell him that you love him, and that you're sorry for all the times you've hurt him, but you're crying too hard so that all that comes out is,
"It should've been you." He seems to understand you, though you barely understand yourself. He takes your hand and leads you to the couch, where he waits for the crying to subdue. It finally does, and he brushes your hair back behind your ear with the back of his hand.
"I'm sorry." You whisper, and he doesn't question for what. You didn't expect him to.
"What about Logan?" he asks, and you know he's still hurt from the last time you spoke.
"We're over." You tell him, and he smiles slightly.
"So everything's taken care of?" he asks in a repeat of the question he has asked you once before. You nod, but do not speak. Instead, you crash your lips to his and he responds by pulling your body closer. His kisses haven't changed much, you realize. They still make your mind go blank, and your knees go weak. He kisses with more passion than he used to, but so do you. He's the first to break away, and he leans his forehead against yours.
"How long?" he whispers, and you need no explanation as to what he means. It's always been you and him, and you understand each other better than anyone else. You kiss him lightly on the lips before pulling back, your lips curved in a smile.
"Forever."
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