Author's Note: Ok so this is my first fanfiction so bring the fire don't be gentle with me. Second the rating will be changed from T, I'm just not sure when or what chapter so bear with me. I hope you enjoy this and let me know how you feel with reviews, I'd love to hear from you. Now on with the show.

I hated her. Although this had rung true for quite some time, I couldn't quite place my finger on the moment it was blatantly obvious or even the moment that I had started to have the aversion that I had acquired towards her. Don't get me wrong she was stunningly beautiful, she came from money and was everything a sane person could have possibly asked for. She had the same quick wit, passion filled anger, and perfectionist attitude that I did and that served to show that only opposites attract. I couldn't stand her unbelievable compulsion to try and beat me out in everything that we both desired for nor her need to fuck all my ex-boyfriends.

Or maybe I couldn't stand how perfect she was. The rich family, the well-respected father, the Ivy League and ex-head cheerio sister, the prudish, too good for anyone else mentality, the perfect life. She reveled in it. It was admirable, I must say but it still pissed me off.

I just couldn't quite jump on board with all the other bumbling idiots that thought she was God's gift to earth. It was that plain and simple.

But who was I kidding? I knew better than anyone how fucked up her life was. I knew what an ass Russell could really be. I knew that her mother would never stick up for her and Fran no matter how wrong their father ever was. I had been there to see a few of his many, many outbursts only to watch Judy cower out and never say anything. And I knew that the only way Judy dealt with her guilt over it was fancy wine and aged bourbon.

Whenever things got crazy, she always came to me. She cried to me. She told me things that I'm sure to this day she's never told anyone else. She trusted me, took shelter in me. But that was before. Before it all changed and all started crashing down. Before we became who we are today.

I tried for years to try and act like she didn't get to me but I'm not one to be secretive of my emotions. I essentially wear my heart on my sleeve and I couldn't hide how she made me feel.

I don't know how it came to be that the two of us became so distant. We weren't always like this. When I first met Quinn in sixth grade I thought she was a bitch but this was a good thing, she reminded me of me and I valued that in a person. So long as they weren't that way with me, the HBIT of McKinley, we were good. We ruled the school together, as a team. We were Batman and Robin. Bonnie and Clyde. The Don and Clemenza. But then somewhere between eighth grade and freshman year it all changed. Quinn started to realize what a threat to my reign she could be and had no qualms with using it to her advantage. We've been torn ever since. We only interacted on a daily basis for two reasons and two reasons only: the Cheerios and Brittany.

Brittany.

The only reason I was ever nice to anyone. Our relationship, and I do use that term loosely, was so completely different than the volatility that was Quinn and I's relationship. Britt made me want to be a better person and I loved her with all my being. She could do no wrong and I'm pretty sure I even worshipped the ground she walked on.

I couldn't help myself, though. She was so beautiful and one of the only two girls I'd ever loved. It didn't matter how many times she left me for Wheels, or tried to push me out of the closet, or drunk made out with some guy at a party after doing the same to me only minutes before, I still loved her. Britt was everything to me. She made me want to really aspire to be something and without her who knows what kind of terror I could've inflicted onto McKinley high or to myself.

She tried to better me with her pseudo-intervention and attempted to get me into Louisville on scholarship, but I knew that cheer wasn't where my heart was. But New York and medicine were. Now here I was two months later, starting classes at NYU, embarking on being an adult when I was just an eighteen-year-old girl graduating from high school. It all seemed so sudden.

"Mija, we're going to be late. You don't want to miss your flight, Santanita, it's the only one for the rest of the day." My mother called to me. I sighed. I knew she was right but was I ready to leave everything that I had worked so hard to build in the last thirteen years of my life.

I took one last look around my bedroom. There would be no more sneaking out of the house to go to another of Puck's stupid parties or hiding liquor in my shoeboxes. No more sleepovers with Quinn, Britt and I with Brittany sandwiched between us so that we wouldn't kill one another. No more heavy make out sessions with Britt or crying in my bathroom once I found out that she loved Wheels or that she wasn't going to graduate with the rest of us.

Maybe it was a good thing. Maybe it was best that I went far away in order to chase the dreams that I knew that I deserved. Maybe all I needed was to forget it all and start fresh. Maybe this wasn't a bad thing at all.

"Santana!"

"I'm coming!" As I turned to go, I saw a picture that Quinn had given me the summer before freshman year. I had tucked it away and hid it from myself. It was only fitting that I'd find it now. The picture had a younger Quinn and I hugging each other tightly with the biggest smiles on our faces- it had been from the day of Quinn's birthday a few months before my own- and the caption "I don't know what I'd do without you. You encourage me to be who I want to be and you make me so happy. You're my other half and I love you, Santana. Love, Q."

It almost seemed to taunt me and make me wonder 'What had happened to us? Where did we go wrong? What turned us from those happy girls to the people we are today?'

I'd be lying If I said I didn't know what happened if I said that I didn't know the answer to my own questions. Those memories were forever etched on me so how could I ever forget? But what could I do? It happened and nothing could change it.

Closing the door to my room, I shook my head and sighed. Maybe this wasn't a bad thing after all.