Title: Shadows from a Lingering Sun

Autor: Mesha (mesha@gmx.net)

Fandom: Tokyo Babylon / X

Pairing: Seishirou x Subaru

Warnings: lemon, BDSM, asphyxiation

Spoilers for Tokyo Babylon

Disclaimer: Seishirou, Subaru and their universe belong to CLAMP, I'm just borrowing them for this fic (Seishirou made me do it! ^^;).

Summary: Between Tokyo Babylon and X: A short insight into Seishirou and Subaru's relationship.

Thanks to my beta-readers Brandy, Sarah and Rachael for their helpful suggestions. ^_^


Shadows from a lingering sun
Osoki hi no
blur into dusk...
kage mo haya nashi
falling cherry petals.
chiru sakura
(Soko)

Shadows from a Lingering Sun

"Do you really think that it is so easy, Subaru-kun?" Seishirou asked coldly. "That I will just kill you and get it over with, end it all for you?"

Subaru looked up, his green eyes empty with too much pain and loneliness and desperation. He didn't say a word, although his breathing increased a little, the fast heartbeat thudding against the narrow chest where the life was just barely hidden under that thin layer of skin.

Yes, Seishirou thought, Subaru so obviously wanted it – and of course, why shouldn't he want it? In all the years that had passed, no matter where he had been, what work he had done, there had always been the presence of the young Sumeragi at the back of his mind, the hurt young boy on his quest for revenge and for answers.

"A foolish thing to do," he mused, "but then, that's what makes you human, isn't it? Doing foolish things, always bringing yourself nearer to destruction and yet all the way denying it... but doesn't that also mean being a coward? You want death, and yet when you have reached your goal, you so desperately try to fight against your destiny. Foolish, Subaru-kun, very foolish."

"No, that's-"

"Ah, shh, don't lie to me!" Subaru flinched as one of Seishirou's long fingers caressed his lips in a twisted caricature of a lover's gentle touch. Seishirou allowed himself a fleeting, satisfied smile – purely for the benefit of the exhausted boy, of course, but then, you had to make certain concessions when dealing with humans. But not very much longer... no, indeed, not much longer now.

"I know you, Subaru-kun, so intimately as if I had indeed been your lover – and for all that trust you put into me, I could just as well have been. Isn't it so? One word from me and I could have had you naked on your stomach in seconds," – and here Subaru flinched and blinked desperately to keep the telltale wetness in his eyes from rolling down his cheeks, – "but you were such a naive little boy it probably would have bored me to death. Ah, you – really – are – disgustingly pathetic, Subaru-kun," he breathed and found a positively unreasonable pleasure in the way the boy's eyes closed in absolute pain. He let some seconds pass, studying the thin face, the tracks of wetness and the bitten, bleeding lips with the cruel curiosity only a scientist could feel towards his object of research.

And yes, after all, the boy hadn't changed much. Seishirou refused to see him as a man, because despite the years that had passed, the changed appearance, the thin, long legs, the shorter hair, despite the cigarettes which dangled so provokingly from the boy's fingers at every meeting like an unspoken challenge, despite his aptitude at onmyoujitsu, his daily hard work of battling the souls of the bitter and hateful...

Despite all this, Subaru was still a young boy hiding beneath a thin, ever-crumbling wall of self-hate and desperation. He could see it in his eyes, they still hadn't changed. Of course, they were no longer those deep, vast pools of green which filled so readily with unconditional love whenever they saw him, but still...

They showed everything.

Hate, desperation, pain, never-ending suffering and still, still, still after all he had done to show him, to rip the naïveté from the boy, still... foolish, foolish hope.

Shining through the tears of pain, showing in that tiny flinch every time Seishirou hurt him anew, this ubiquitous hope was something that... irked Seishirou. Like an itch, every time he looked at him.

He wanted to – Rip it out of him. Destroy it. Utterly.

Completely.

It was something that should have happened at the end of that year, something Subaru should have lost along with his sister, but apparently it was far more resistant, battling against him, battling against the outcome of that bet which had already been decided the day he made it...

And yet.

There it was, still, in wet green eyes, the trembling of a hand which did not dare to reach for him, the soft, rasping sound of air leaving Subaru's throat in a groan which should have been his name, Seishirou could hear it, see it, feel it, and it...

No. It did not anger him, simply because the Sakurazukamori did not feel anger.

But it disturbed him (only a small disturbance, of course, but nevertheless a tiny imperfection in the outcome of his plan), and that was something which he just couldn't allow. Not if he wanted to fulfill his wish, and the wish of the young Sumeragi as well.

Still, there was time left until it would come to that. Days, weeks even if fate should decide to grant the slowly dying planet a last respite. Time enough for the Sakurazukamori to perhaps finish what he had set out to do at the end of that year.

"Such a precious doll," he said softly. Two fingers stroked down a soft cheek, down a slender throat, stopping to cherish the fluttering pulse speeding up against his fingers. Hot, hot blood, and wouldn't it be sweet to let it out of its prison, watch it stain the ivory skin, redden the soft lips, yes, exactly, suck the breath out of his lungs in a last kiss until the boy was still, lifeless and more perfect than any dollmaker could ever hope to create.

Subaru gasped beneath him, that red, tempting mouth opening to curse, perhaps, or to plead for mercy or death or nothing at all, and Seishirou didn't care and sealed it off with his own mouth and tongue and none of the mock-gentleness, because wasn't that why Subaru kept waiting for him here in the first place, to get rid of lies and masks and pretences?

No mask, then, no smiles and caresses for him. Instead he got the killer, the Seishirou who smiled as the coldly burning thrill of conquering mingled with freed hot blood under his nails as he marked his prey anew with marks without power and yet more binding than any spell he had ever studied.

And Subaru cried, cried and cried the way he hadn't been able to the day his sister died and never since, cried the way only Seishirou could make him cry, with silent sobs and silvery wetness on his cheeks in the darkness and red lines of pain on his chest and his thighs, and oh, how it pleased Seishirou, made him purr with contentment like the cat who had just let the mouse free to watch it run in pain and fear...

And wasn't hope all the sweeter when you knew just the exact moment in which it would be crushed?