A/N: The title of this is from a Beach Boys song by the same name
Obligatory Disclaimer: Still not mine. ANd I'm still a broke college student
I love him.
I'm done trying to deny it. Well, not really denying it. More like preventing myself from blurting it out when I'm around him.
I don't plan on telling him. Why would I?
I have nothing to offer him. No home, no hope, no future; only myself. And what am I if not a broken shell of a man?
How would I even phrase it? "Hey Cas, how is the war in heaven going, also I am desperately in love with you?"
That's ridiculous. He doesn't have to find out. Nothing has to change between us. We'll still be Cas and Dean. Just not the way I want us to be.
Maybe this is just a really big crush. Maybe it'll pass.
But who am I kidding? I would gladly sell my soul all over again to make him feel just a little of what I feel for him.
And the worst part is that I just don't want sex from him. I dream of us cooking lunch together, taking Sam to those stupid organic markets he likes. Fuck. I'm in way too deep here.
I just want to hold him. Stroke his hair. Ask him how his day was. Maybe kiss him.
Nothing much. Silly things even.
I just want to be with him.
But he is so much better than I will ever deserve.
A/N: Reviews are love