Summary: Rude goes missing after a night out, and the remaining Turks are left to solve the mystery of his disappearance. Short and cute two-shot, written for a word prompt. Reno/Rude friendship, rated M for Reno's mouth.
Usual disclaimer: Don't own, wish I did. This fic is written for fun and not profit.
It was just past midnight on a Sunday night, and Reno was home alone, which was unusual for the weekend - the redhead would usually stay out at all hours, crawling from pub to pub. Reno and Rude were now roommates, and Reno's mostly-silent partner had still not returned from his date. The redhead chuckled as he flipped through the channels on the TV. "Way to go Rude!" he murmured distractedly to himself. "Not that I was waiting up for him anyway, but it's nice that someone in this house is getting some," Reno said, glaring at the goldfish in its bowl on the end table next to the sofa. "Well, I guess you're not getting laid either," he said to the fish, sneering.
Reno finally settled on watching an informercial for a fitness system that promised rock-hard abs in just thirty days. He lifted his shirt and poked at his own concave stomach, grimacing. "Hmpf," he muttered in disgust. "I think it's bullshit, myself. Who needs their stomach to be that flat?" Soon, Reno began to nod off to sleep, the monotone droning of the woman on the infomercial lulling him into a stupor.
He bolted upright when the doorbell rang. "The hell!" Reno blurted, rubbing his eyes as he sprang awake. Looking at the time on the clock, he groaned. "Bet it's Rude, bastard probably forgot his key." Reno shuffled over to the door, clad in pajama pants and worn slippers, and went to open the door.
"Hello?" Reno looked out and saw nobody. Sticking his head out a bit further, he looked to the right, then the left, scanning the entire corridor of their apartment complex. "Who the hell - ?" His toe hit against something hard, and it clinked against the floor. A glass jar with a lid that had holes punched in the top…and the jar itself contained a frog. "Huh?" Reno picked up the jar and peered through the glass, inspecting the little green frog. "Why's someone leaving a frog here, of all things?" The frog jumped up and down in the jar excitedly, and Reno chuckled. "Wait…there's something written here," Reno murmured, narrowing his eyes as he peered at a small piece of paper that was tied around the top by a ribbon.
"It says…."Though a prince you did not turn out to be, fear not – for true love's kiss shall set you free." Reno snorted a laugh and rolled his eyes. "Stupid poem. I hate dumb riddles like that. Cute little guy," Reno muttered, studying the frog. He let out a yawn, and shook his head. "All right, yo. I'm tired, I'll figure out what to do with you in the morning. Shutting the door and locking it – save for the chain lock, in case Rude came home – Reno shuffled off to bed, the frog jar tucked under his arm. He slid into his bed, placing the jar on his end table, and didn't give it another thought as he drifted off to sleep.
The next morning…
Reno was not completely surprised that there was still no sign of Rude; he was certain that his roommate simply must have had an even better time than he'd expected on his date, and perhaps had stayed over the woman's house, whoever she was.
"Must have been a good date, anyway," Reno murmured to himself as he dragged himself unwillingly through the shower, though there was the promise of coffee – and lots of it – once he got into the office. That alone was all the motivation Reno needed to get himself going most mornings, although more often than not he was late.
He came out of the bathroom , and spied his cat pawing at the jar containing the frog, trying to knock it over. "Hey! Don't touch that, Tifa! I gotta release him into the wild!" The Turk had named the cat Tifa mostly as a joke; when he'd gotten her as a kitten, he'd also been trying to gain the attentions of an uninterested Tifa Lockhart. After she rejected Reno's advances, the Turk had named his kitten Tifa, joking with Rude that "this is probably the only way I'll get Tifa into my bed." Rude had, of course, groaned and rolled his eyes.
Reno quickly dressed into the white shirt and black uniform suit of the Turks, laced up his boots, and threw his still-damp hair into a ponytail. He tucked the jar underneath his arm, and was horrified to see an empty goldfish bowl in the living room. "No!" he said with a horrified gasp. "Damn it, Tifa, did you eat my fish?" Reno demanded, glaring at the cat. The cat stared at him, and ignored him in favor of licking her paws.
"I can't believe you ate Rufus," Reno said sourly, pulling his goggles over his head, he locked up his apartment, and headed off to work at the ShinRa building. "You're coming with me, little buddy," Reno told the frog, still inside the small glass jar. "Can't trust Tifa, yo. She'll eat you too. Hmm, what should I name you?" he wondered idly, as he briskly walked to work.
At the Turks' office, Tseng and Elena were the first to arrive, as usual, but both seemed surprised to see Reno show up sans Rude. Reno seemed just as surprised that Rude wasn't already there. "Anyone see Rude?" he asked, setting the frog jar on his desk as he walked over to get himself a cup of coffee.
Tseng arched an eyebrow curiously. "No…I was about to ask you the same, Reno. He wasn't home? He hasn't called in."
Now Reno began to look worried. "I have no idea where he is, sir," Reno said quietly. "He had a date last night…and he never came home. I assumed the date went really well, when I didn't hear from him." "Well, perhaps he's just running late, " Tseng suggested, not seeming terribly worried.
"Rude is never late, sir," Reno insisted. "Ever."
"What's this, Reno?" Elena said, squinting at the tiny frog in its glass jar. "Aw, he's so cute, but don't you have enough pets, Reno?"
"I have one less, now," Reno said forlornly. "Tifa ate Rufus."
Tseng gave Reno a confused look, so the redhead was forced to explain. "My cat…Tifa. She ate my goldfish, Rufus."
"Do you always name your pets after friends and co-workers, Reno?" Tseng asked, bemused. "Wait…what's this?" he said, glancing at the paper tag hanging from the frog jar.
"Oh, that was on the floor outside my door last night," Reno replied, momentarily distracted by the more immediate need for coffee. Tseng moved in closer to investigate the animal, and read the tag attached to the jar. He took in a sharp breath, then lifted the jar to peer at the frog. The creature blinked at Tseng with its large, brown eyes.
"Elena?" Tseng murmured quietly, as Reno returned with his coffee. "What...color eyes do Midgarian frogs generally have?"
"Green, or a yellowish-green usually, sir," Elena replied, curious as to why Tseng was asking the question.
"It's a frog, who cares?" Reno said with a laugh and a shrug of his shoulders.
"It's not a frog," Tseng said firmly, setting the jar back on Reno's desk. The three Turks huddle together, peering into the jar.
"Not a frog?" Reno echoed, amused. "Then what is it?"
"That," Tseng said with a sigh, "is Rude. He has been cursed. Those are Rude's eyes, see?"
"What!?" Reno and Elena burst out simultaneously. "Cursed? Wait, how can Rude be a damned frog, yo?"
"Someone has cast Frog Song on him," Tseng explained calmly. "Elena? Do you have a Maiden's Kiss handy? We'll be needing that. If you don't have one, get it from my office."
"No, I have one right here, sir," Elena replied promptly, grabbing the vial from her gear bag. "Here it is."
"We'd better get the frog - er, Rude, I mean - out of this jar before administering the cure," Tseng said, unscrewing the lid of the jar. The frog tumbled out onto Reno's pile of papers, and let out a loud ribbit. Reno grinned at the amphibian. "Hey, Rudy," he said, tickling the creature under the chin. "We'll have you changed back in no time. I wonder who did this to you?"
"We should find out soon enough, if Rude remembers anything, that is," Tseng said, taking the maiden's kiss from Elena. The frog wriggled within Reno's grasp, kicking out its long legs.
"He's pissed, yo," Reno muttered, trying to keep his grip on the frog. "Can't we hurry this up?"
"Of course," Tseng replied, opening the vial containing the maiden's kiss. Reno held up the frog as Tseng doused it, but it kicked out hard, loosening Reno's grip on the slimy creature. The frog, suddenly free, hopped down the hallway as the Turks scrambled after him.
"Shit! Rude, get back here!" Reno took off after the escaping frog, yelling and shouting.
Tseng groaned as he and Elena followed suit. "Elena, this is not good. I cannot tell if the dose even reached him. It is possible that none of it even made contact with Rude."
"What will we do?" Elena asked frantically, running after Reno, who had stopped by the secretary's desk, wild-eyed and frantic.
"Stop that frog!" Reno shouted. "Hey...I need a net. Have you seen a net around here, yo?" Reno asked the secretary.
The secretary blinked at the hyper redhead. "Annette is at lunch, sir," she replied in a dull tone. "If you'd like to leave her a message, I can let her know when she gets back that you were looking for her - "
"I AM NOT LOOKING FOR FUCKING ANNETTE!" Reno shouted. The frog was now hopping toward the glass elevators, just as the car was coming down to their floor. "A net! N-E-T, net! Like for catching butterflies and shit! Oh hell - " Reno took off running as he saw the elevator doors open, the frog hopping into the car. The doors quickly shut as Reno came running after, and crashed into them.
"No!" Reno shouted, pressing the button frantically to summon the other elevator car. He could see that the elevator Rude was on was heading down; Reno feared that Rude would never be seen again if he got outside. "Rudy, I'm coming!" Reno shouted after the departed elevator car as he got into his own, keeping a constant eye on the other car, which was now approaching the 60th floor. It was now a matter of who got to the bottom first, and right now, it looked like Rude - in frog form - might win the race, and Reno worried that if that happened, he'd lose his partner and best friend forever.
A/N: It feels like forever since I've written or posted something! :( Work has been eating me alive lately, along with migraines, but I've working on stuff as I can, it's just going much more slowly than it used to. I have another one-shot I'm posting shortly, and also working on chapters for Pictures of You and Mean Street, for those following those stories. Thanks for your patience as I try to get my brain back into writing mode! :)