One shot of Chuck and Blair
Reason to Live
Summary: He wasn't always her reason to live but after she finally opened her eyes to the devil and took a risk that she found herself more vulnerable than ever.
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A little over a year ago
"You should go with your dad. He needs you and guess what, I don't." Blair Waldorf said to her boyfriend of many year Nate with so much resolute that she even surprised herself. Nate stared at her intensely and inside she scoffed cause it's the most intensity that she's seen from him in years. She just entered Chuck's limo and left him standing on the curb. Hoping to find an escape but didn't realize escape was not in that direction.
Weeks Later
If you told Blair Waldorf, Queen B of Constance, a year ago that her and Prince Charming of upper east side Nate wouldn't be together for Debutante Ball and that she would lose her virginity to the sleaziest manwhore Chuck Bass, she would have taken her Manolos off and smacked you in the head and crucify you for eternity. But if you tell her today, she might even smile, but that smile wouldn't reach her eyes.
She really don't understand why this happened. Why she is no longer with Nate. Why she is with Chuck, in secrecy of course but nonetheless. Why she actually feel free and feel like a teenager for the first time and not the pristine bitch. She supposed that it has to do with the devil the smirk that shook her from the core. Of course, she never tells him that. If he knows, that means that he has all the power and control and Blair is not the type to relinquish control. So she puts him down, act disgusted, pretend to loath him, feeling some sort of sick satisfaction when he seems deeply hurt. Although he'll never admit that he feels something other than carnal pleasure.
"Are you coming back to bed, Blair. Another round before you have to go meet w/ my best friend?" She looked at the devil that was perched on top of her bed, behind the locked door. Guess she'll have to hurt him once more.
A year later
"It was a game, I hate to loose. You're free to go." Blair blinked to stop her falling tears and left the bar faster than her father left her mother. If you told Blair a year ago, that Chuck Bass will make her feel pain as much as she is feeling right now, she would have ripped you apart just like Jenny Humphrey. But she should have realized that Chuck Bass will always get and have power just like her: they're kind of twisted that way.
She never believed in karma, retribution of some sort, do unto to others as you would like them do unto you. She controlled her destiny, her life and her power. She should have known that he did the same. Both desperately holding to one thing that they can control, cause everything's slipping and falling apart. But as she cried in her bed at night, she starts to believe karma a little. She hurt Chuck, hurting him enough to make him run to Monaco and now he's hurting her. Except he doesn't believe in karma nor care about her. But he is and will always be her reason to live so she takes one more breath, holding on, feeling in control.