Authors' note: We're back! Hope you enjoy this as much as we enjoyed writing it. It started as an IM conversation that turned into a roleplay that turned into this.
It was a quiet afternoon, but boring afternoon in the middle of the summer. Elzi and Shuri sat going over stories to post on fanfictions on the floor of Shuri's study. Papers lay all around, some hanging out of folders, other's crumpled into balls.
Shuri stood and stretched after a particularly long discussion regarding the plot of a new adventure.
"I need more caffeine, I'll be right back." Shuri said, walking out of the room.
"More caffeine?" Elzi echoed once it finally clicked in her head. She knew she had only minutes to act.
She left the room and returned a few moments later with a laundry basket, which she overturned in the middle of the space between the end of the couch and the coffee table. The space was ridiculously wide, because people actually had to get up from the couch to get things on the table.
But anyhow, the laundry basket lay upside down and Elzi turned and left the room again. This time, she returned with two chairs with tall backs that she set up beside the laundry basket so that the backs bordered the short side of the laundry basket.
Then she turned and left again, only to return moments later with a heavy quilt that she threw over the backs of the chairs to form a tent over the laundry basket.
Then she moved over to the bookshelf and moved two great stacks of useless hardcover tomes to either side of the chairs.
She left again, returning with a giant stack of pillows under each arm, on in each fist, one stuffed between her legs so she was forced to waddle, and the last held between her teeth. She used those to line the wall of books, chairs, and the laundry basket on both sides.
'I'm ready!' She thought to herself. Then she decided that to have an unarmed fort was useless, so she ran to get ten bags of marshmallows, which were for roasting later, but this was an emergency. She dumped a couple of the bags into a big bowl she'd also grabbed and left the others for backup.
Then she left and returned with a slingshot and her bow and arrow. The tips of her arrows were no more than soft foam anyway, but she stuck a marshmallow on it anyway.
'Now,' she thought, 'I'm ready.'
Then she thought about the odds. One her against one caffeinated Shuri. She was greatly outnumbered.
So she decided to enlist help. Walking over to the pile of papers, she located the large hardcover book that contained all of the adventures of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. She turned to a page, a particularly interesting one that had Watson and Holmes sitting in their sitting room.
Because what else does one do in a sitting room? And how exactly does a person get out of a sitting room if they cannot stand? But these are beside the point.
Anyway, Elzi reached inside the book and found the collar of the man she was looking for. She pulled (very hard, this is not easy to do, and requires a lot of practice, do not try it without professional supervision) out Doctor John Watson, retired army surgeon and Sherlock Holmes' friend and Boswell. But Elzi had fetched him to lend her a hand. She pulled him behind the fort, while he looked around in shock. Elzi began refilling his gun with marshmallows. Fortunately, the little ones fit just perfectly and she returned his revolver loaded with its new projectiles.
"Umm… what is going on?" Watson asked, looking bewildered. And indeed, how else is a poor doctor to look after he's just been pulled out of his own book? Rhyme is unintentional.
"I must enlist more help." Elzi said. She returned to the book.
"What am I shooting?" Watson asked.
"Shuri is getting more caffeine." Elzi explained. Watson quickly went into military mode and prepared himself for the mental and physical exhaustion than lay ahead.
Now, once you pull a character from a book, there is a portal that will open on both sides. Herein lies the problem, because now other characters will wander in.
And Holmes decided to demonstrate for us. He appeared, looking just as bewildered, but a little more calm about it than Watson.
"GET DOWN YOU FOOL!" Watson screamed at him, general-style.
Holmes hit the deck and crawled on his elbows behind the fort.
"What is going on?" He asked, looking from Watson to Elzi and back again.
"Grab some marshmallows and prepare yourself!" Watson said. Elzi handed Holmes the slingshot and a handful of marshmallows.
"What am I to be firing at exactly?" Holmes asked.
"Shuri, on caffeine." Elzi said solemnly. Holmes' face broke out into a grin (which some might have called evil and others would call just plain obnoxious) and he grabbed a bigger handful of marshmallows.
Then Mrs. Hudson, decided to further illustrate my point, wandered in. She looked at us curiously. We all shouted for her to get down and hide, but she just calmly walked over and stole a marshmallow that Holmes had already loaded into his slingshot.
"How dare you take my marshmallow!" Holmes cried, outraged.
Mrs. Hudson calmly walked back to the book and the portal to her home. "I do dare!" She declared to the detective.
"Oh this is crazy!" Holmes said. He walked back to the book and entered the portal.
"Coward!" Watson said. "I'll have you hung for desertion!"
Elzi sighed in frustration, but soon after, Holmes was back with about a dozen Scotland Yarders in tow. Between the three of them, they gave all of them marshmallows to throw and everyone got a spot behind the fort's wall. Lestrade, Gregson, Bradstreet, and Hopkins all were nearer the front, while the PC's lined the back.
"I shouldn't ask, should I?" Lestrade inquired.
"It's a bad idea." Holmes said.
Suddenly, ominous footsteps sounded in the hallway. Elzi, Holmes, Watson, and all the other men got quiet and started to aim.
Shuri returned, a steaming cup of coffee in her hands. Elzi held up her hand to tell everyone to wait and Shuri set it on one of the bookshelves near the door before she turned and realized there was a big fort in the middle of her study.
"Elzi what is – " Shuri never got to finish her sentence as marshmallows rained down around her. She was soon up to her knees in marshmallows, and grabs some to throw back.
One of the marshmallows she was throwing happened to hit Holmes on the forehead. Holmes, a little mad about being hit, charged after Shuri with a fistful of marshmallows. "This means war! Gahhh!"
"Get back here Holmes!" Watson called, but it was too late.
Shuri, being a little shocked not only that Holmes was there, but also charging at her, did the only thing she could do: fled.
Elzi, not wanting real harm to befall Shuri, shot Holmes with her marshmallow arrow. It hit him straight on his bottom. Laughter rippled through the fort as everyone peeked over the wall to watch Holmes cry out in surprised and dance around in pain.
He turned to fix the fort with an evil glare and instantly, everyone slowly and silently sank behind the walls again. They looked around at one another and someone smiled, which made someone laugh, which in turn had everyone just about in tears from laughing so hard. Even Shuri, who had moved out of Holmes' range, was cracking up.
"That was epic!" Shuri called. Elzi dared to stand up over the wall and bow. "Thank you, thank you!" She said.
Holmes, pride injured, charged towards Elzi. He tripped over a marshmallow and fell forward, landing bent over one of the chairs. Elzi had sat down and her face was right next to his when he stopped falling. "That was really sad Holmes. Do you need walking lessons?" Elzi asked with mock seriousness.
"Shut up, I do not!" Holmes protested, trying to get up.
"I think you do." Watson said.
"No I don't!" Holmes said. He finally managed to stand, and Elzi threw marshmallows at him. "Stop!" Holmes said firmly.
"Make me." Elzi said, sticking her tongue out at him.
Shuri had wandered back over, picking up marshmallows in case she needed more ammo. At that moment, Holmes decided to throw a marshmallow at Elzi.
This was a poor choice. Shuri, a little defensive of Elzi, threw her marshmallows at Holmes.
"Don't throw marshmallows at her!" Shuri said.
Watson realized his comrade was getting ganged up on. He fired his revolver at Elzi, but Elzi had ducked at that moment to get more marshmallows and instead Holmes was hit and a smoldering marshmallow hung from his pointy nose. He was trying to look at it, making him cross-eyed.
"Where is my camera?" Shuri demanded, looking around.
"Watson!" Holmes said, sounding quite whiny, and Watson shrugged.
"Isn't my fault she ducked." Watson said.
By now, all of the PC's and inspectors were useless, too humored by the situation even to stay upright.
Elzi, having her camera phone handy, was taking pictures, but Holmes tried to cover his nose with his arm.
"Stop!" Holmes said.
Elzi sighed. "Fine…" She said, holding her phone lower, but keeping the camera at the ready.
Holmes tried to remove his arm, but anyone who has ever heated marshmallows knows that once it cools, it gets hard. Holmes was realizing this now. And I suppose it was rather unfair of Shuri and Elzi not to warn him of this fact, since he had never seen a marshmallow before.
So now, Holmes forced his arm away, and had a long strand of marshmallow goo trailing from his nose to his arm. Elzi once again proceeded to take pictures.
"Those so need to go onto the internet!" Shrui said.
"No they don't!" Holmes said, though really, he had no idea what they were talking about. He just assumed it would bring him further humiliation, since that's all they had done.
"Yes!" Elzi agreed.
"You are never going to hear the end of this Holmes." Watson said, looking back at Lestrade and the others, who were laughing so hard at this point that Elzi wondered if they were going to require medical care. Fortunately, Watson was there. Unfortunately, he did not have his medical bag.
Holmes was obviously in a bad mood. He reached for Elzi. "Give me the camera!" He said, though he pronounced it wrong. Elzi moved it out of reach and Holmes stepped over the wall to go get it. Elzi, realizing what was about to happen, quickly rose and dashed over the other side of the wall.
"Help!" She screamed.
"Throw it to me!" Shuri said, acting like this was a football match or something.
Elzi tossed it and Holmes tried to change direction to intercept, but he tripped again and landed on Elzi.
Tackle, but no ball.
Holmes tried to get up, but once he was on his feet, he stepped back and landed with his bottom in the bowl of marshmallows, which had been moved at some point in the madness.
"Agh!" Holmes cried.
Elzi, who was already on the floor, started laughing really hard. Shuri was laughing and trying to take pictures.
Of course, all the others were laughing still. Elzi wondered how many of them had eaten some of their marshmallows. Lots of sugar + chaos = really hyper PCs.
"Holmes you deserved that!" Elzi declared.
"What did I do to deserve it?" Holmes asked, looking even more furious, if that was even possible at this point.
"You tackled me!" Elzi said. She wondered if he had broken anything.
"She has a point." Watson said.
"Oh do be quiet!" Holmes snapped.
"You asked!" Watson retorted.
"I wasn't asking you!" Holmes said.
Both Elzi and Shuri oooed. "Harsh!" Shuri said.
"Don't fall into one of your moods Holmes." Watson said.
"I won't unless Shuri doesn't give me that camera." Holmes said.
Elzi, being a smart aleck, decided to question Holmes' statement. "So you will if she does give you the camera?"
"What?" Holmes said, working out what she had said. "No!" He protested, hitting her with a marshmallow. He tried to stand, but the bowl rose with him, plastered to his rear. After a few seconds, it fell, but Shuri still had pictures.
"I brought you into this world and I can take you out!" Elzi told him warningly.
"Would you? Please?" Holmes asked, looking over towards the book.
"Since you asked so nicely, no." Elzi smiled.
"Nope, your staying until we're done torturing you." Shuri said.
"It's Torture Holmes Day?" Holmes asked.
"Yep!" Elzi said. She was a little off though, since every day was torture Holmes day.
Watson had left the safety of the wall (and the crazed Scotland Yarders) and was coming towards them with something hidden behind his back.
"Holmes, there is something I've always wanted to do to you." He said.
"What is it Watson?" Holmes said, whirling around. He met a pillow coming the opposite way and it bashed him in the face. He stood, looking quite stunned, while Elzi and Shuri ran for their own pillows.
"Woo! Pillow fight!" Elzi hollered.
Shuri, laughing, commended Watson.
"Watson, what in the world? I'm not going to even ask why you've always wanted to do that." Holmes said.
"Because I've always wanted to whack Mr. Detective here for deciding to ambush one of my patients. I hadn't known that patient was a friend of Holmes. Idiot, nearly gave me a heart attack!" Watson said.
"You are too nice Watson." Elzi said. She would have, of course, just given him a good smack to the back of the head.
"What didn't you just whack him?" Shuri asked.
"As Elzi said, I'm too nice." Watson said.
"Nice? Holmes cried. "You just hit me with a pillow!"
"Better than a chair." Watson said menacingly.
"Wow, I didn't think Watson could get THAT mad." Elzi said with wide eyes.
"I go close." Watson said.
"Oh come on, it was funny!" Holmes decided to try to defend himself.
"No it wasn't."
"Holmes, Holmes Holmes…." Elzi put her head in her hand and shook her head, sighing.
"It wasn't that big of a deal!" Holmes said. Watson just hit him with a pillow again. "I said I was sorry!"
"I never accepted your apology." Watson said.
Holmes adopted his tone of sincerity. "I'm truly sorry Watson." Holmes said.
Watson sighed, "very well, I forgive you."
"Well, now that you two are buddies and all..." Elzi whacked Holmes with pillow.
"Hey!" Holmes took the pillow Watson had and whacked Elzi over the head with said pillow. Watson hurried to fetch another, while Elzi returned the hit and Holmes returned it once again.
Shuri threw a marshmallow at Holmes. "Don't hit her!"
"Why does everyone pick on me?" Holmes lamented. "Stop it!"
Everyone paused a moment, then Elzi hit Holmes again. "No!"
Shuri laughed and hit Holmes too. Holmes hit them both.
Watson hit Holmes while his back was turned and Holmes his Watson while Watson hit Elzi.
Elzi just stood there looking at them curiously. "Wow… just wow."
"I think you were supposed to pass the hit to me."
"Pass the hit?" Holmes echoed.
"Yep!"
"Alright then." Elzi said, hitting Shuri. She wasn't as rough as she had been with Holmes and Watson, because, after all, they were grown men. Shuri and Elzi were young ladies. Plus, Shuri was her bestest friend.
Watson moved back and threw up his hands. "Wait! I'm out of this!"
Holmes grabbed Watson and held him still. "No, you started this, hit him Shuri!"
Shuri shrugged and hit the doctor. Holmes thanked her and let go of Watson, who hit him. Shuri hit Holmes too.
"You made me hit Watson, and that's not nice!" Shuri said.
Holmes raised a finger as if to signal a pause, but Elzi had not yet hit him, so she did. Holmes just stood there with his mouth hanging open, looking shocked and angry."
"Uh Holmes, you aren't planing on killing us now, are you?" Shuri asked.
"Because you can't." Elzi told him.
"And just why not?" Holmes asked.
"Because we will torture Watson." Elzi said.
"Help!" Watson cried as Shuri hit him with a pillow.
"Hey! No torturing Watson!" Holmes said, whacking both Elzi and Shuri.
"I didn't actually hit him!" Elzi protested.
"No, but still." Watson said, hitting Elzi again.
Elzi hit Holmes twice. "That's payback!"
"You suggested torture in the first place so you deserved it!" Holmes said. He hit Elzi again. "That's for the unnecessary payback."
Shuri whacked Holmes, so Watson hit Shuri, so Elzi hit Watson, so Holmes hit Elzi again. Shuri whacked Holmes once more, than Watson sighed. "Honestly, are we going to go through this again?"
"We have nothing better to do." Elzi said, shrugging.
"Yes we do!" Holmes said. He suddenly reached for a bottle of chocolate syrup that was sitting on the table. Shuri and Elzi were planning on falling into a sugar coma later, but this was more exciting anyway. Holmes squirted it at Shuri.
Shuri slowly whipped chocolate syrup from her eyes, then through a marshmallow at him.
"What in the world?" Watson asked, looking at the brown stuff.
"It's chocolate syrup," Elzi explained. The she reached for a can of whipped cream, which she spray at everyone.
Shuri grabbed another can and squirted it in her mouth.
"Wait, that stuffs edible?" Holmes asked.
"Um…. Yes." Shuri said around a mouthful of whipped cream. Both Holmes and Watson wanted to try some, so Elzi and Shuri sprayed some in their mouths.
"That stuff is delicious!" Watson said.
"Well, it was originally going to be used for tonight when we make s'mores and banana splits and stuff." Elzi said.
"Can we help?" Holmes asked looking prepared to beg.
"Uhh… Shuri?" Elzi said, looking at her friend.
Shuri what do you think about a part two? And what about you, lovely audience? Up for more?