THE DEVIL CAN HEAR YOU

What if Xellos is more of a busybody than anyone ever realized?

A/Z, L/G and a VERY VERY lame hint at X/F at the very end.

Much thanks to the very creative AmberPalette for the inspiration for the Amelia/Zel portion of this story. We once discussed the idea of Amelia and Zel having met as kids, based on an RP she did, and then I asked her if it was okay for me to work it into a story...and she said yes!


"I'm sorry, Beastmaster-sama. I'm afraid I was too late."

"No matter. This will only serve to make things a bit more interesting."


Amelia held the wiggling pink bundle tightly, afraid of dropping it.

"She's energetic," remarked Lina Inverse, holding out her arms.

The princess let out a sigh of relief and handed Lina's goddaughter over to her.

"Thank you, Lina-san," Amelia said, pushing sweat-soaked bangs out of her eyes. "I'm still not quite sure what I'm doing. This is all so surreal."

"You've got that right," Lina agreed, pulling down the pink blanket to reveal a flushed, wrinkled face with big blue eyes.

The child, Melanie, looked up at her godmother and gurgled.

Amelia flopped back against the half-dozen pillows on her large bed and allowed her eyes to close for a moment. Lina rocked the baby until she began to doze, as well.

Their peace was interrupted by the unusual sound of the astral plane being moved. It was not a sound one would recognize unless one was as familiar with it as Lina and Amelia.

"What do you want, Xellos?" Lina snapped, not looked up from her goddaughter's sleeping face.

Amelia's eyes flew open and she stared at the Mazoku with concern.

"I just wanted to see how Seyruun's next heir is fairing, that's all," Xellos explained, politely.

As the Mazoku made his way over to peek at the child, the chamber door flew open to reveal a very confused Gourry and a very angry Zelgadis.

"Get away from my daughter, fruitcake," Zelgadis spat, crossing the room in three quick strides and lifting Melanie from Lina's arms. The action woke the baby, and she began to fuss.

Xellos tsked and said, "Look what you've done, Zelgadis-san. Overreacting as always."

"Feh," grumbled the chimera, not taking his eyes off his child. "There is no such thing as overreacting when you're around."

Xellos feigned hurt, a hand fluttering to his chest. "Zelgadis-san! When have I ever done anything but help you all?"

"Give it up, Xellos," Lina commanded. "What do you really want? I doubt you're that interested in a newborn baby."

"Oh, but I am, Lina-san," Xellos answered, opening one eye to look at the sorceress. "My people have always been very interested in Seyruun and the white magic commanded here. Why, it takes all my concentration just to get inside the kingdom. So of course we were...curious, you could say...about the newest addition to the Seyruun royal line. Amelia-san is a very powerful sorceress, and Zelgadis-san is...one of a kind...so we are curious what their offspring is like."

Zelgadis narrowed his eyes and passed Melanie off to Gourry, whose eyes lit up as he took the bundle. Gourry was even more thrilled at the idea of being a godparent than Lina.

"If you so much as put one finger on Melanie, I'll rip out whatever you Mazoku pass off as a heart and feed it to you," Zelgadis threatened in his most deadly voice, reaching for his sword.

"Zelgadis, please!" Amelia called from the bed. She was still weak from the birth and unable to use magic, so the last thing she wanted was a fight right in her own bedchamber.

The chimera paused and slowly took his hand away from his sword, though Gourry noticed that his friend's fingers were still twitching a bit as he looked at Xellos.

"Now," Amelia went on. "Can we please discuss this like civilized people? If Xellos-san just wants to look at Melanie, I don't see the harm in that. Gourry-san?"

Gourry slowly walked over to Xellos and pulled the blanket away from Melanie's face.

Craning his neck, the Mazoku looked at the baby with interest.

"Hm," he said. "Interesting."

"What?" snapped Zelgadis.

Xellos continued, "It's just that she doesn't seem to have any of your chimera components. Not visibly anyway."

"Yes," said Zelgadis, with a hint of pride, "We already noticed that, and we're grateful for it."

"No," corrected Amelia, "You are grateful for it. I would have been happy either way."

Zelgadis couldn't stop the lop-sided smile on his lips at his wife's statement.

"But," Xellos went on, "That doesn't mean she hasn't inherited some of your gifts. There's a great possibility that she'll be extremely powerful. You see, and I probably shouldn't be telling you this, but my Master has a concern about the four of you breeding with each other."

"WHAT?" Everyone else in the room yelled, simultaneously.

"Oh, yes," Xellos went on calmly, finally turning away from Melanie. "I was unable to stop Amelia-san and Zelgadis-san from procreating, and their progeny could cause us a great deal of trouble someday. But it's really Lina-san and Gourry-san that could cause us the most trouble."

"T-That's ridiculous!" Lina screamed at the Mazoku, her face flushing red.

Xellos waved a hand, as if he were discussing a storm front moving through, and not the possible implications of people he had traveled with having sex with each other.

"I'm lucky Beastmaster-sama has been so forgiving of my failures. After all the trouble I went to so that none of you would meet one another, and you met anyway."

"WHAT?" They all yelled again, blinking at the Mazoku. Melanie woke and began wailing. Gourry placed her back in the arms of her mother, and Amelia was able to coo the child back to sleep fairly quickly.

Lina quickly (but quietly) stalked over to the Mazoku and grabbed his collar.

"You had better explain exactly what you meant when you said you tried to make it so we didn't meet, or I'm going to let Zel take out years of frustrations on you. Got it?"

"U-uh, sure, Lina-san," Xellos said, "It doesn't matter if I tell you now, anyway. What's done is done."

Lina let go of the Mazoku, pushing him a little in the process. Xellos tugged at his collar, uncomfortably, and then snapped his fingers so that a chair appeared right next to him.

Taking a seat and crossing his legs, Xellos also conjured a cup of tea from the astral plane and began his tale of how he first truly came to know of the Slayers...


"It's wonderful that our children are getting along so well, wouldn't you say, Rezo-dono?"

Rezo The Red Priest nodded and gave a soft smile in the direction of the gruff voice.

He could not see Prince Philionel, of course, but Rezo sensed the imposing size of the man. Though he was kind and a well-known pacifist, Philionel has been described to the sage as a huge man who was not unlike a grizzly bear. But, like the plush bears carried by children, something about Phil's demeanor put Rezo at ease.

The great sage had been summoned to the white magic capitol, Seyruun, to deal with a viral outbreak that had even affected the Prince's young daughter, Amelia. The poor child has been sick in bed for days, but now, thanks to Rezo, she was running around the gardens laughing and playing with his own great-grandson, Zelgadis.

Zelgadis had been shy upon meeting the princess. She was only five years old, but had recently lost her mother. Rezo impressed upon his great-grandson to be nice to the princess and appeal to her that he had lost his own mother when he was a baby. He thought that, perhaps, it would be nice for Zelgadis to have a friend close to his own age.

But his nine year old great-grandson had quickly become putty in the hands of the younger girl. Where his boy was quiet, contemplative and shy; Amelia was energetic, out-going and full of spirit.

Rezo had been blind all his life, and he once again cursed his eyes that he could not see the happiness on his boy's face that he heard in his laughter, coming from the garden.

"It's been a while since I've seen Amelia this happy," Prince Phil continued, "Ever since her mother...Anyway, she's easy to love and likes everyone, but I haven't seen her so taken with someone in a long time. That grandson of yours is a great match for her, it seems."

Something in the Prince's tone caught Rezo by surprise. "What are you implying, Philionel-sama?"

"Please" said the Prince, "call me Phil. And I'm just thinking...they're very young still, but perhaps we could discuss the option of a betrothal? Don't get me wrong, it's not common in Seyruun anymore, but I'd be a fool not to worry about Amelia after what happened to my dear wife. And with my older daughter gone, I have to look out for Amelia's best interests at all times. Combining our families would bring me a great sense of peace."

Rezo mulled that over for a moment. Seyruun was a powerful kingdom, ruled by a powerful line of royalty. The great mage smiled. "Philionel-sama, I would be pleased to discuss the possibility of a betrothal with you."

The big man clapped his hands together and bellowed, "Wonderful!"

He then threw an arm around Rezo's shoulders and guided him into the palace.

"What about the children?" wondered Rezo.

"They're fine out there," Phil said, "there are guards everywhere. Let them have their fun while we talk."


"Amelia, please come down!" the little boy yelled from his place firmly on the ground.

"I can't, you have to give justice speeches from really high up!" the princess called down to her new friend.

Zelgadis Greywords was only a boy of nine, but he often felt that he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. This was one such time. He was the older one, and his famous great-grandfather had insisted he watch out for the young princess. But now here he was, watching as she stood atop Seyruun palace's tallest birdfeeder.

"Pay attention, Zelgadis!" the little girl insisted, raising one foot and pointing toward the heavens.

Zelgadis sucked in a sharp breath as he watched the princess pose with only one foot on the birdfeeder.

"Only those with dark hearts and empty souls dare use their power to increase their own wealth and power! Greed is a sin for which, I, Amelia wil Tesla Seyruun, shall not stand!"

And then she wasn't standing at all, because Amelia wil Tesla Seyruun lost her balance and began plummeting toward the ground.

With a squeak, Zelgadis was there to break her fall. He didn't catch her, per se, but he did soften her descent.

Much to his chagrin, she had landed right on top of him.

"Get off!" the boy yelled, face flushing with embarrassment and anger. "You could have died, you stupid girl!"

Amelia climbed off and stared at him, blinking. Zelgadis bit down on his lower lip, afraid that any moment she would begin wailing. After all, that's what any other girl would do.

But, then, Amelia was not like any other girl he'd ever met.

"You're the stupid one!" she yelled back at him. "I would have just used Levitation and I wouldn't be hurt at all!"

"But you didn't use magic! You landed on me!"

"That's because I knew I was going to land on you!"

The children stared at each other for a moment. And then, just as suddenly as the argument had begun, it ended with peels of laughter.


"Come, Zelgadis," Rezo instructed his great-grandson. "We must be moving on."

"But...but Amelia said she would show me the royal library. The off-limits one!" Zelgadis knew he was bordering on whining, but he didn't care.

Rezo smiled and patted the boy's tangled mess of lavender hair. "Don't worry, I promise we'll be back very soon. You'll be seeing a lot more of the princess."

Rezo had never lied to him, so mumbling only slightly, Zelgadis began following his relative from the palace.

That night, Rezo was plagued by nightmares.

Darkness, deeper than the blackest pitch, spread out in front of him. Consumed him. It was darker than the blackness in which he already lived with his blindness.

Then a voice.

"The light is your enemy," the voice said.

"No," Rezo answered. "The light is what I work toward. If I do enough good, someday I will see the light."

"You won't," said the voice from the darkness. It's assuredness disarmed Rezo.

"You're lying," was all the great mage could think to say.

"The light must be destroyed. Only dark deeds can provide you with what you want. A little evil for the greater good."

"No." Rezo said again.

"You must not align with Seyruun. It is a kingdom of light, and you are a creature of darkness. Seyruun is not the key to your greatest goal."

"But," Rezo's head was beginning to hurt, "I was promised that Seyruun would use all of the sorcery and research at their disposal to heal my eyes, and all I had to do was betroth my great-grandson to their princess."

"You will not find what you're looking for in Seyruun," repeated the voice.

Rezo sat up in bed, face dripping with sweat.

He now knew what he must do.

"Zelgadis! My boy, come here, quickly!"

The boy came running into his grandfather's chambers, still groggy from sleep.

"What's wrong?" he gasped, taking in his relative's disheveled appearance.

"I need to speak with you," Rezo said. Something about his voice alarmed Zelgadis, but the boy said nothing.

He obediently went to his grandfather's bedside, and Rezo's hand flashed out and grabbed him by his arm.

Putting one clammy hand to the boy's face, Rezo mumbled a spell. It was a time-reversal spell which he had modified just so.

Within seconds, he had erased all of Zelgadis' memories of his day in Seyruun.


"Wait, wait, wait!" Amelia whispered (loudly) from bed. "I think I would remember if I'd met Zelgadis as a little girl! And my father would remember meeting Rezo!"

"Ah," Xellos said, holding up a finger to stop her. "That is true. However, the next day, Rezo returned to Seyruun one last time. Alone. He asked to meet with the prince and princess, and used the same spell on them. By the time he departed, they had no memory of him or young Zelgadis."

Only shallow breathing could be heard as everyone in the room gaped at Xellos.

"What?" the Mazoku finally said.

"Let me guess," Lina finally said, narrowing her eyes. "You were the convenient voice in Rezo's dream that night?"

"Of course," Xellos confirmed, unashamed. "The influence of the Dark Lord made it exceedingly easy. I also imparted on him a sense of urgency to cut all ties with Seyruun."

"You BASTARD!" Zelgadis snapped, unsheathing his sword. Melanie began to cry at the disruption, and Gourry grabbed his friend around the waist, holding him back.

"Zel, calm down, you know you can't hurt him!" Gourry tried to reason with his friend, but Zelgadis had already chanted his spell Astral Vine and his sword shone red with energy.

"Zelgadis, please!" Amelia begged, throwing back the covers and finally trying to crawl out of bed. Unfortunately, she was still so weak that she immediately began to fall forward, still holding Melanie.

Suddenly, in an array of sparkles, Xellos was there. He caught the princess and her child, and placed them back into bed.

"Get your hands off my family!" Zelgadis still raged, fighting against Gourry. "You've done enough damage already!"

"Zelgadis-san," Xellos tried to reason with the chimera. "I've done nothing to you. You still ended up with Amelia-san, and you have a beautiful child together. I did not make Rezo turn you into a chimera. All I ever did was attempt to cheat fate, as it were."

At that, Zelgadis began to calm down a bit. Gourry finally let go, and Zelgadis ran to his wife's bedside. He gently brushed her hair out of her face, and made sure she and the baby were okay.

"In a way," Amelia said, not taking her eyes off her husband. "It's a bit romantic. Even after the meddling of a Mazoku, we still managed to meet and fall in love."

Zelgadis blushed a bit, but smiled. Love was still not an easy topic of discussion for him, but he was getting better.

"So that's how you tried to stop Amelia and Zel from being together...but what about me and Gourry?" Lina chimed in. "You definitely mentioned us, so spill it!"

Xellos sighed and sat back down.


Brandon Gabriev grabbed the Sword of Light from his younger brother, Rob, and held it tightly to his chest.

"The sword will never pass to a younger sibling!" Brandon barked at his family.

"It should pass to whoever is worthy!" Snapped another younger brother, Edward.

"We shouldn't be fighting with each other..." the youngest, Gourry, tried to say. But the others were arguing right over him.

Six brothers, all deeming themselves the best swordsmen, were ready to kill each other over a stupid enchanted sword.

Gourry had never fully understood the big deal behind the Sword of Light. Sure, it was rare. He got that part. But any good swordsman should be able to fight with the rustiest piece of steel or the sharpest blade ever created, equally.

He would rather see the sword in question float to the bottom of the sea, as long as it stopped tearing his family apart.

His grandmother had always been afraid that this would happen someday. She had warned them all, but only Gourry had listened.

After their parents passed, the boys immediately began fighting over the sword.

Disenchanted and filled with disgust at the situation, Gourry left the small house without a word.

No one noticed.


"What's wrong, kid?" asked a friendly man who had noticed Gourry throwing pebbles into a creek.

"My family," Gourry said, flinging a pebble so hard that it practically put a hole in a tree on the other side of the creek. He didn't turn around, but just kept looking out over the water.

The man watched that display with quiet interest and waited for the young man to continue.

"They're fighting over this stupid sword that's been in my family for generations. Whoever wields it is supposed to be some big-deal warrior, but I don't see the point. Whichever of my brothers gets it is probably just going to go be a mercenary anyway. Working for whoever has the biggest coin purse."

"Why shouldn't you have the sword, then?" asked the man.

"Because..." Gourry trailed off, unsure of how much he should say. "I'm the youngest. It will never pass to the youngest."

"Then you should take it," the man said, as if it were obvious. "You don't even have to use it if you don't want to. Throw it into the sea if you have to, but at least they'll stop fighting, right?"

Gourry considered that for a moment.

"I'd thought about that, but I could never run off with that thing. Not really. It would cause so many problems..."

"Not if they don't catch you," the man said with a smirk.

Gourry finally turned to look at the stranger, but no one was there.


"I took the Sword of Light and left that same night," Gourry chimed in, taking everyone's attention from Xellos' story.

"Yes, I'm aware," Xellos said with a sigh.

Lina crossed her arms over her chest and snapped, "But what does this have to do with us? We all know Gourry ran off with the Sword of Light."

"Because," Xellos said. "I was the one who convinced him to take it and throw it into the sea. After he did so, I was going to grab it and return it to its rightful place with the other Darkstar weapons. That would have saved me three years worth of trouble! You see, I was already on a mission to find them all, and Gorun Nova was the easiest to locate back then. If Gourry-san had just done what he set out to do, it would have saved you all a lot of trouble, too. Valgarv never would have been able to summon Darkstar without Gorun Nova."

Xellos turned to Gourry and said, "Gourry-san, there is something I've wondered for years. Why didn't you throw Gorun Nova into the sea like you intended? What did that man say to you?"

"What man?" Lina asked, also turning to look at Gourry.

"Oh," Gourry said, "I wandered for a bit and did some mercenary jobs since I needed money. Then I got fed up since I figured I was no better than my brothers, so I went down to a river and was getting ready to throw the sword away, but this old guy with a fishing rod started talking to me and he told me to keep it. He said I should take it and go do good with it. He said I should find something to fight for."

The last was said with a warm smile at Lina.

Blushing, Lina turned back to Xellos and said, "I still don't understand what any of this has to do with me."

"Simple, Lina-san," Xellos smirked, opening his eyes. "We were watching you from the moment you left Zephilia. A girl who could do the Dragon Slave at such a young age, and a Sorcerer's Guild prodigy with a sister who is a Knight of Ceiphied. Oh, yes, we were very interested in you."

Lina suppressed a shudder at the thought of the Mazoku being "interested" in her when she was just a kid.

"As such," Xellos went on, "We didn't want you getting hold of the Sword of Light any more than we wanted Gourry-san to possess it. At that time, we had no idea that you would actually get hold of Gourry-san."

He said the last sentence with such a lack of irony that Lina nearly belted him for it.

"But what's done is done," Xellos said again. "There is only so much we Mazoku can do. And I'll admit, you have all made things very interesting for us for many years now. This is a great era to live in."

Xellos stood and the chair disappeared.

"I'll be going now," the Mazoku announced, unnecessarily. "I may not be back for a while. Unless, of course, Lina-san and Gourry-san..." His thought trailed off, but he leered at the sorceress and swordsman.

Lina finally belted him, and then he disappeared back to the astral plane.

The four friends were silent for a long while, but then Amelia finally laughed and said, "I don't know whether we should believe anything he says."

Zelgadis let out a disgusted snort and said, "You're just now figuring this out?"

"Yeah," Lina agreed, "it's really disturbing to think that Xellos was involved in our lives way before we actually knew about it. But...he's never actually lied to us."

At that thought, they went silent again.


"Xellos, I assume there's some reason you told them everything?"

"Not everything, Beastmaster-sama. You know I would never tell them everything. As I told them, what's done is done so there is hardly any reason to hide the truth anymore. Part of the truth, anyway."

"Indeed," Beastmaster Zellas agreed, grudgingly.

"Besides," continued Xellos, "perhaps this will make Lina Inverse think twice about her relationship with Gourry Gabriev."

Zellas smirked down at her general/priest and shook her head.

"Xellos, even after all these centuries, you know so little about women."

Xellos sighed. "So I'm told."

THE END?