This is my very first fanfic! Woo-hoo! I actually have a bigger Golden Sun fic planned, but one, once school starts, I'll have little time to breathe, let alone write, and two, I'm trying to pluck up the courage to actually post it. Admittedly, it has a couple of OC's, and I have seen people hate on the stories that have them. So, if I do come to post my story, please try not to flame much. I'm touchy to bad reviews. Also, could someone please explain to me what a mary sue is?
Anyway, I do not own "If You Were Gay" and Golden Sun. They belong to Avenue Q and Camelot, respectively.
Tyrell was kicking back at the cabin with a book in hand. Aah, he thought, an afternoon alone with my favorite book, "How to Burn Things Up." No one here to bother me. How could it get any better than this?
Suddenly the front door slammed shut. Tyrell sat up in surprise, but relaxed when he saw his dad. He started to read again when Garet stuck his head right in front of him.
"Oh, hi, Tyrell!" Garet booms out.
"Hi, Dad."
"Hey, Tyrell, you'll never guess what happened to me when I was walking home. This guy was smiling at me and talking to me." "That's very interesting." "He was being real friendly, and I think he was coming onto me. I think he might've thought that I was gay!"
Tyrell cleared his throat. "So, uh, why are you telling me this? Why should I care? I don't care. What did you have for lunch today?"
"Oh, you don't have to get all defensive about it, Tyrell-"
Tyrell cut Garet off. "I'm NOT getting defensive! What do I care about some gay guy you met, okay? I'm trying to read." To prove it to him, Tyrell stuck the book back in his face.
Garet lowers the book. "Oh, I didn't mean anything by it, Son. I just think it's something we should be able to talk about."
"I don't want to talk about it, Dad! This conversation is over!" "Yeah, but-" " OVER!"
Music started to play from out of nowhere. "Where's the music coming from?" Tyrell asked, but Garet was already at it.
"Well, okay, but just so you know… If you were gay, that'd be okay. I mean 'cause ,hey, I'd like you anyway, because, you see, if it were me, I would feel free to say that I was gay (but I'm not gay)."
Tyrell sighed, "Dad, please, I'm trying to read." Garet snatched the book from his hand and threw it across the room. "WHAT?"
It turned into a shouting match between the son and father. "If you were queer," "Ah, Dad!" "I'd still be here," "Dad, I'm trying to read that book!" "Year after year," "Dad!" "Because you're dear to me," "Argh!" "And I know that you-" "What?" "- would accept me, too," "I would?" "If I told you today, 'Hey, guess what, I'm gay!' (But I'm not gay.) I'm happy just being with you," "Fireball equals big boom…" "So what should it matter to me what you do in bed with guys?"
Tyrell gasps. " Dad, that is GROSS!"
"No, it's not!" Garet retorted cheerfully. "If you were gay, I'd shout hooray!" "I am not listening!" "And here I'd stay," "La la la la la!" "But I wouldn't get in your way."
At this point, Garet had Tyrell backed into a corner. "You can count on me to always be beside you every day to tell you it's okay, you were just born that way, and as they say, it's in your DNA, you're gay!" Garet belted out.
"I AM NOT GAY!" Tyrell shouted.
"If you were gay." Garet finished.
"Okay, Dad, that's IT!"
Half an hour later, Garet and Tyrell, as well as Isaac and Matthew, were standing in front of their now burning home.
"So," Isaac asked mildly, "how did this happen?"