I honestly didn't think i was going to write this. I'm so darn lazy, but I did so you have to read it. This is the sequel to
"Winter" contiuing in the grand tradition of that fic (haha j/k) this is also a Tori Amos songfic. The song in question is Little
Earthquakes off the CD of the same name.
This one wasn't written in public so I didn't have as much fun with it. (Note to self take fic notebook with you to the mall.
hehe like I'd go the mall ^_^) I'm thinking I can't write Duo cause he seems really OOC here, but hey he's been in an abusive
relationship so what the hey.
Response please I crave response.
Title- Little Earthquakes
Author- Gloha Ryuzaaki
Warnings- Most likely a little OOC. More batardization of Heero. (I can't help it) Kind of short. (What I like in legnth I make
up for...in the fact that mercifully it's short.)
Plot- After his conversation with Wufei Duo starts to think
Archive- If you guys still archive then I'd love it.
Note- indicates flashbacks
"Little Earthquakes"
Duo just wasn't strong enough. He had latched on to Heero early and the war, and now he was to frightened to let go. Even
though he was in pain, the pain he associated with leaving Heero, with leaving his security blanket of sorts, was far greater.
At this point Duo doubted that he had ever even loved Heero. Actually he'd doubted that from the beginning. Because there
had always been someone else. As Heero had always known.
"How do you think I feel?" Heero had demanded in one of his 'kinder' moments "I'm just a cheap replacement!"
Of course when Heero had lost it he said things that deep down Duo knew, but didn't really care to have vocalized.
He'll never love you. You know that don't you?
He did. Duo believed it for a very long time. He believed it because he didn't want to be pathetic. He didn't want to hope.
Because hope, especially a false hope like that one was, could destroy him, break him. Unrequited dreams were, after all
painful.
He had far to many dreams about Wufei. He didn't know when he had fallen for the chinese pilot, or how but swiftly it had
happened, like a good fast kick. And fear drove him to Heero, who used him for a quick lay, some comfort in the night.
But that morning had given him hope. Was Wufei really concerned about his nose? Did that mean Wufei cared for him?
Could Wufei care for him? Could anyone? Was he really not as worthless as Heero said?
Did someone love him?
No, it couldn't be that way. No one cared for him. No one loved him. Heero always told him that. How could anyone love
him? He was a clutz, a fool, a liability. Although now Duo wasn't so sure. Maybe it had been foolish of him to believe
Heero.
Hell it was foolish of him to stay with Heero. That came to him with a clarity sharper than ice water. Only now he had the
strength to believe it. And the strength to do something about it.
//Oh these little earthquakes
Here we go again
These little earthquakes
Doesn't take much to rip us into pieces
I can't reach you
I can't reach you
can't reach you
Give me life
Give me pain
Give me myself again//
"Duo?" Heero looked up from where he was cleaning his gun. "What do you want now?"
"Heero I can't...we have to talk."
"Hn?" Heero glared at him, cobalt eyes cold enough to freeze even the warmest heart.
"It's just...Heero," Duo began to fiddle nervously with the frayed ends of his braid. Silently he prayed to whatever supreme
being was up there governing fate to give him a little bit of stregnth. Then he thought of Fei and his possible shot at happiness
and he was able to go on. "Heero why do you do this to me?"
"What are you talking about?" Heero demanded coldly. "Do what to you? You're such a fool."
"That Heero, why do you do that to me?" Duo demanded raising his voice slightly. "You yell at me, you call me names, you
hit me. Why?" Heero looked down, not responding. "I know I don't love you. I was wrong." Heero looked up slightly."But if
I was wrong then there's no word to describe what you are."
"What do you mean?" Heero demanded even colder than before.
"I mean it's over," said Duo. "It's all over. I'm tired of this. I don't.. no you don't..." Duo smiled a little "You don't deserve
me. You never did. It's all over for good this time."
"You can't be serious," laughed Heero, "What would you do?"
"It dosn't matter. All that matters is I can't be with you anymore. I can't take this. I'm more than just sex."
"But Duo," Heero almost looked as if Duos speech had affected him somewhat.
"No," said Duo standing up a little taller. "It's over. It has to be. Goodbye."
With that he walked out of their room forever, off on a search for Wufei.
~~end