A/N This is just a little side project that I had in mind. I don't expect a
lot of reviews but if you could it would be nice. I'm sure I spelled
something wrong but I cant find it. Anyways, this is a bit inappropriate
for children under 13. Go read my other story Elle's Secret it's a bit
more sane.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot. Do you really think I own Harry Potter? Wow some people are so dense these days.
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Potions Class:
"Today we will be making the Hobbit Potion. Can anyone tell me what this potion does? Other than Ms. Granger," Snape snarled as Hermione's hand slowly went down.
"Oh! Oh! I actually know for once!" Dean raised his hand and waved it around.
"I told you to wear your blue ones when you see me don't make me remind you again," said Snape.
"No, I know the answer," said Dean.
"Oh. Of course. I knew that. Answer the question then," said Snape.
"The Hobbit potion make the drinker turn into a Hobbit for a certain amount of time. RING OF POWER!" said Dean, his voice booming as he said 'Ring of Power.'
*Dum dum dum*
"The Ring of Power?"
"Yes the Ring of Power! That's what I just said!"
"Sorry, wanted to be a bit dramatic there."
"The Ring of Power is commonly know as the the One Ring. It is seen in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy," said Dean with a tone that sounded like a Pokedex. (Try to imagine it.)
"Turn to page 666 and you shall find the ingredients."
Ingredients:
Hobbit Weed
Aragorn Stubble
Legolas Hair
Hobbit Feet Hair
Lembas
More Lembas
Gimli Beard
Chip off the Old Gandalf Staff
Powdered Orc
"What are you waiting for? Start!"
Hermione started putting in ingredients while Harry and Ron were preparing them. Three cauldrons down there was a big boom.
"BOOM!"
"Longbottom! I see you added to much Hobbit weed! And look at that color! It's suppose to be pink! Not magenta! For your punishment you shall drink it and get high off the hobbit weed. Then you will strip off your clothes and dancing in the cauldron!"
"Er..darn. At least its better than the old 'nude cauldron washing game' punishment."
Neville drank the whole cauldron of magenta liduid. Within moments he was high. REALLY high. Neville was so high that he passed out before he could take off his pants. Snape looked a bit disappointed.
"Crabbe! Goyle! Carry Neville to Madame Pomfrey! No...leave his shirt off."
Snape picked up the shirt and went into his office. After a while he came out with a grin on his face. What happened in there? I don't even want to know...
"Good Malfoy. I see you shaved your Aragorn stubble quite evenly. Unlike Potter here you know how to handle a man's job. Come see my in my office after class."
Snape had that sickening grin on his face again. Harry chopped up some lembas and put it in.
"Harry! You're not suppose to put in the lembas until the Hobbit Feet Hair have turned blonde!"
"Opps."
Harry tried to scope them out but it was too late. "Time to try your potions everyone! Drink them NOW!"
The whole class started drinking their potion.
"I can tell by your purple colored beard that you added to less Legolas Hair."
Parvati frowned and her little hobbit feet stomped on the floor.
"Malfoy seems to be the only one who has done it correctly. His feet have hair, he is half his normal size, and he had the smell of weed in his mouth. Seven million points to Slytherin."
Malfoy looked quite content even though he was about two feet high.
"Potter on the other hand put the lembas in early and came out to be a stupid, fat hobbit. Shall I take off points or make you stay after class?"
"Err...I'll stay after class."
"Excellent. Muah ha...Muah ha ha... MUAH HA HA HA! Just clearing my throat."
~class ends~
Everyone is back to their normal tall self. Harry stays after.
"You told me to see you Proffesor Snape?"
"Yes. Dean will show you what to do."
"Err...ok."
Dean pops out from Snape's broom compartment naked.
"You have to do Nude Class Cleaning Punishment with me. The name is self explanatory."
"Ok...I knew I should've gone for the points. It's freezing out here."
Harry does as he is told and starts cleaning with Dean. Why is Dean here? He didn't get in trouble. Strange. Very strange. Makes you think what he's up to. Snape sits down with a bag of popcorn and watches them. Dean startes showing off but dancing while he cleans. Snape seems to enjoy it. Harry doesn't want to be outdone by Dean so he starts break dancing. Snape's face lights up. Soon they all stop cleaning and start having a dance contest. Snape joins in and does the Macarena with Harry. Neville walks in and finds them all dancing nude. "Professor Snape!"
"No Neville it isn't what you think!"
"I can see perfectly well! You're, you're cheating on me!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Harry and Dean get back into the broom closet and come out with all their clothes on. They walk away as they hear Snape and Neville making out...I mean making up.
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A/N I know that was weird. I hope it was some how humorous. If you people want one about another class you can just let me know. I'll try to get one done. Please R&R!
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot. Do you really think I own Harry Potter? Wow some people are so dense these days.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Potions Class:
"Today we will be making the Hobbit Potion. Can anyone tell me what this potion does? Other than Ms. Granger," Snape snarled as Hermione's hand slowly went down.
"Oh! Oh! I actually know for once!" Dean raised his hand and waved it around.
"I told you to wear your blue ones when you see me don't make me remind you again," said Snape.
"No, I know the answer," said Dean.
"Oh. Of course. I knew that. Answer the question then," said Snape.
"The Hobbit potion make the drinker turn into a Hobbit for a certain amount of time. RING OF POWER!" said Dean, his voice booming as he said 'Ring of Power.'
*Dum dum dum*
"The Ring of Power?"
"Yes the Ring of Power! That's what I just said!"
"Sorry, wanted to be a bit dramatic there."
"The Ring of Power is commonly know as the the One Ring. It is seen in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy," said Dean with a tone that sounded like a Pokedex. (Try to imagine it.)
"Turn to page 666 and you shall find the ingredients."
Ingredients:
Hobbit Weed
Aragorn Stubble
Legolas Hair
Hobbit Feet Hair
Lembas
More Lembas
Gimli Beard
Chip off the Old Gandalf Staff
Powdered Orc
"What are you waiting for? Start!"
Hermione started putting in ingredients while Harry and Ron were preparing them. Three cauldrons down there was a big boom.
"BOOM!"
"Longbottom! I see you added to much Hobbit weed! And look at that color! It's suppose to be pink! Not magenta! For your punishment you shall drink it and get high off the hobbit weed. Then you will strip off your clothes and dancing in the cauldron!"
"Er..darn. At least its better than the old 'nude cauldron washing game' punishment."
Neville drank the whole cauldron of magenta liduid. Within moments he was high. REALLY high. Neville was so high that he passed out before he could take off his pants. Snape looked a bit disappointed.
"Crabbe! Goyle! Carry Neville to Madame Pomfrey! No...leave his shirt off."
Snape picked up the shirt and went into his office. After a while he came out with a grin on his face. What happened in there? I don't even want to know...
"Good Malfoy. I see you shaved your Aragorn stubble quite evenly. Unlike Potter here you know how to handle a man's job. Come see my in my office after class."
Snape had that sickening grin on his face again. Harry chopped up some lembas and put it in.
"Harry! You're not suppose to put in the lembas until the Hobbit Feet Hair have turned blonde!"
"Opps."
Harry tried to scope them out but it was too late. "Time to try your potions everyone! Drink them NOW!"
The whole class started drinking their potion.
"I can tell by your purple colored beard that you added to less Legolas Hair."
Parvati frowned and her little hobbit feet stomped on the floor.
"Malfoy seems to be the only one who has done it correctly. His feet have hair, he is half his normal size, and he had the smell of weed in his mouth. Seven million points to Slytherin."
Malfoy looked quite content even though he was about two feet high.
"Potter on the other hand put the lembas in early and came out to be a stupid, fat hobbit. Shall I take off points or make you stay after class?"
"Err...I'll stay after class."
"Excellent. Muah ha...Muah ha ha... MUAH HA HA HA! Just clearing my throat."
~class ends~
Everyone is back to their normal tall self. Harry stays after.
"You told me to see you Proffesor Snape?"
"Yes. Dean will show you what to do."
"Err...ok."
Dean pops out from Snape's broom compartment naked.
"You have to do Nude Class Cleaning Punishment with me. The name is self explanatory."
"Ok...I knew I should've gone for the points. It's freezing out here."
Harry does as he is told and starts cleaning with Dean. Why is Dean here? He didn't get in trouble. Strange. Very strange. Makes you think what he's up to. Snape sits down with a bag of popcorn and watches them. Dean startes showing off but dancing while he cleans. Snape seems to enjoy it. Harry doesn't want to be outdone by Dean so he starts break dancing. Snape's face lights up. Soon they all stop cleaning and start having a dance contest. Snape joins in and does the Macarena with Harry. Neville walks in and finds them all dancing nude. "Professor Snape!"
"No Neville it isn't what you think!"
"I can see perfectly well! You're, you're cheating on me!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Harry and Dean get back into the broom closet and come out with all their clothes on. They walk away as they hear Snape and Neville making out...I mean making up.
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A/N I know that was weird. I hope it was some how humorous. If you people want one about another class you can just let me know. I'll try to get one done. Please R&R!