Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club or any characters from it featured herein.

I've been on a Kyouya/Tamaki kick recently. This story was just a stray thought that came to me while I was planning another Ouran story. I thought it would make an interesting scenario once I expanded upon it. It gets a little more sappy than I wanted it to originally at the end, but oh well. The story dictates itself.

I hope everyone enjoys it.

Indulgence

It had been months since he'd been back to Tokyo. His position as head of the Ootori businesses was a busy one and far more fulfilling than Kyouya had expected back in his high school days. The very real challenge of the business world was exciting and Kyouya had thrown himself into his work as soon as he was able with the full force of his personality backing him. At twenty-three, Ootori Kyouya had become one of the biggest names in Japan and the youngest son of the family was loving every minute of his success.

There was always a balance to his fortunes though. Snide remarks about his youth usually slid right past him: Kyouya was far too used to them already. The girls were harder to ignore. The way they threw themselves at him was more subtle than back in high school but, unlike in high school with the Host Club, he really didn't have to be as polite and accommodating when there really wasn't as much in it for him as before. These girls did belong to powerful families, so giving offence wasn't a good idea either. Toeing the line between polite regard and complete indifference had always been an interesting pastime challenge — it was almost second nature to Kyouya now, so the way he treated his admirers was actually quite close to ignoring them as well.

The most annoying downside to his social status was the endless gatherings he had to attend and seem to enjoy. Schmoozing with the rest of his 'peers' was a necessity if Kyouya wanted to stay at the top of the mountain, so he smothered his dislike of the situation with faint smiles and thought how each encounter with someone could possibly turn to his gain. This made the situations far more enjoyable for him than they had been.

The latest soiree on his social agenda was a rather important one. A huge software and technology conglomerate was expanding out with one of their latest products and was forming more ties with other companies not as connected with the industry. It was a major shift in the business world and the initial party needed to be attended. It was one of the few events Kyouya managed to find some enthusiasm for.

For the first hour all he did was dance around with some important people — and some not so important people — while exuding all the charm he had as he manipulated the conversations to where he wanted them to go. Kyouya knew that he'd soon be getting calls from quite a few people with deals that could vastly improve the Ootori holdings. He was in his element and shining brightly. Kyouya thought he might actually be starting to truly enjoy himself.

Then an angel in white laughed as he stepped through the front entrance. All eyes turned to him and whispers started up.

He's back? I thought he was staying overseas to manage interests there? He's as gorgeous as ever. I heard he was returning to take over things here. Do you really think he can handle such responsibilities? He's done better than anyone expected of him. Has he changed much? What has that foreign lifestyle done for him? Does he even belong here any more? Should he have stayed right from the beginning? What does this mean for us now?

On and on the whispers went as the new arrival shook hands and smiled brightly — his greetings enthusiastic and sincere. Kyouya could only stare as the arrival drew closer to where he stood, barely registering the comments around him. It had been years … but he was back now. Was he going to stay for good this time?

The sight of him started up sparks of feelings Kyouya had thought long gone and buried. His pulse raced and Kyouya felt himself being drawn right back to the flame that was Suou Tamaki. The only outwards sign he gave of this was the bobbing of his Adams apple as he swallowed.

Tamaki smiled, a glint in his violet eyes.

Tamaki knew and Kyouya was lost.

The invitation to retire to Tamaki's residence to catch up was to be expected after a long day of talking with people who really didn't care about Kyouya's personal life. Seeing the one person in the room he could sink into a couch and put his feet up with and barely sharing three words without someone else interrupting or dragging him away was frustrating and building anticipation that shouldn't have been needed. It was as though everyone knew how much they wanted to see and talk with one another and were doing everything in their power to keep them separated. The only consolation was that Tamaki seemed to have the same frustrated opinion of the situation.

Both of them started moving towards the exit at the earliest time they could without breaking any unspoken social etiquette rules. Their polite smiles lasted until outside the building where both their drivers were waiting. A far more genuine and welcome smile rose on Tamaki's face and Kyouya didn't have the heart to refuse him — even if he had wanted to. His driver was sent home and Tamaki blathered on about the most inane and nonsensical things in the back of his limo. Kyouya just listened with a contented smile.

The night had turned out far better than he'd ever dared hope.

Once inside the privacy of Tamaki's mansion, (the Suou second mansion could never be anything but Tamaki's true home in his mind now) Tamaki finally allowed himself to indulge in his emotions and gripped Kyouya in a tight and familiarly sentimental hug. Kyouya had been a little surprised earlier when he hadn't been similarly accosted at the party, but it seemed Tamaki had learned some restraint in the years they had been separated. It was as gratifying to realise as it was disquieting.

Would the fact that Tamaki had learned to restrain his emotions have changed him too much? Tamaki's overabundance of enthusiasm and sympathy had certainly been frustrating at times, but all of his friends had recognised it was an essential part of what made Tamaki Tamaki.

Kyouya shouldn't have worried though. The hug seemed to extend forever and the action was overflowing with typical Tamaki emotions. When he heard a tiny sniffle, Kyouya smiled and leaned in further to the warmth of the other body. He almost didn't want to admit he'd missed this, but Kyouya had leaned long ago that everything concerning Tamaki did not make sense in regards to the rest of his life. Admitting to himself that he'd missed his best friend was not the same as admitting he was a nice and fuzzy person in general. Kyouya was satisfied with this.

And, truth be told, he didn't really want to share what he felt for Tamaki with the rest of his life.

Tamaki was actually the first to draw away. His smile was so much brighter than Kyouya had remembered. There was also that hidden amusement glinting in his eyes. That annoying "I know something you don't" gleam that always made him just a little nervous.

Kyouya opened his mouth to say something sharp and deflating, just to wash that look away, but Tamaki spoke first.

"I missed you, Kyouya."

Kyouya was the one to be swept away and left floundering. It was futile to try and grab something solid to get a grip on and the shore was very far away. Kyouya just gave in and went with the flow, trusting that Tamaki knew how to navigate them both.

"Me too."

They hadn't stopped talking in Tamaki's sitting room until near the early hours of the morning. Surprisingly, or perhaps not so surprising when considering the conversers, Kyouya had contributed to at least half the conversation.

Tamaki hadn't yet offered Kyouya's usual guest bedroom for his use despite how they were both starting to droop and yawn. When it became apparent just how late the night had advanced, Kyouya got up and lent a hand to draw Tamaki to his feet. Tamaki didn't let go of the hand once he was up and used to momentum to draw himself closer to Kyouya.

Kyouya just stared, not daring to do anything else.

"You can if you want to, Kyouya," Tamaki whispered. "I won't stop you."

"Why not?"

Tamaki only smiled in answer and Kyouya wondered how and when their roles had been switched. He was supposed to be the ambiguous manipulator and Tamaki the puzzled follower.

Well, if he was going to play Tamaki's role anyway, he might as well adopt the reckless optimism and take what he really wanted.

Kyouya eradicated the distance Tamaki had left between them and kissed the other man. It was no wonder Tamaki was usually so optimistic if it payed off so well.

Neither man deepened the touch further, but as Kyouya drew back he felt Tamaki lean in to let the pressure linger. He smirked and let his tongue brush Tamaki's upper lip as he pulled away. The tiny whimper elicited was delicious.

Kyouya watched Tamaki. Watched his smile deepen, his coy glance and watched him take a step back without breaking eye-contact. Kyouya felt a tug on his hand; Tamaki hadn't released his grip yet.

"Join me?" he asked as he slowly backed towards his bedroom.

Kyouya smirked. "Of course."

It was a good thing Tamaki hadn't married Haruhi. His infatuation with her had turned out to be nothing but that. Tamaki did love her but, once he gave up on the 'daddy' issue and had experimented with the idea of stepping into the taboo of lovers, Tamaki had realised that love was a very multi-faceted emotion. Whatever attraction he'd felt had expired and left warm ashes of friendship. This was a relief to everyone as Tamaki didn't try so hard to catch Haruhi's attention and impress her. He was still Tamaki — unpredictable insanity and all — but they'd all settled into a more stabilised routine together. Such an eclectic group of young men (and woman) shouldn't have survived as friends, but they had and they had flourished as well, mostly thanks to Tamaki.

Kyouya thought it was a good thing the other former Host Club members weren't dating Tamaki. He considered them all worthy opponents. Haruhi, especially, he wouldn't want as a romantic rival. Of course, the other former Host Club members would never have entertained the thought of having a relationship with Tamaki. Too much knowledge about the King soured any possible romantic thoughts. Tamaki's true personality wasn't as accessible as a lover as the one he played up with their former clients. Those who knew him loved and respected him but could never have spent their life with him.

Fools. Their loss ...

Maybe this was really why he was the mother in Tamaki's mamagoto.

Looking over the pale planes of Tamaki's body wrapped in sheets as smooth as said skin, Kyouya smiled. He was a realist. This … it wasn't going to last. Not in the way either of them truly wanted it to. The way Tamaki smiled, the way Kyouya leaned into every touch … they were both too far gone already. It was love. Neither of them would give it up, yet neither of them could do more than indulge during the cracks in their lives.

Kyouya ran a finger down Tamaki's spine and watched him shiver and stir.

Tamaki blinked and smiled and Kyouya melted.

Maybe it was an indulgence, but maybe it was also more.

Maybe these would be the moments of perfect happiness that made their lives worth living.

Tamaki leaned up to kiss Kyouya sloppily.

Whatever this would be, Kyouya could live with the outcome. Forever if he had to.

AN: 'mamagoto' was the term Eclair used to define Tamaki's pretend family situation for the Host Club. I used to always forget the term she used, so I added a definition just in case.