Disclaimer: No i don't own Naruto. Nor I'll make a man out of you.
Warnings: Crack, OOCness, nonsense, yaoi, cursing and a really badly written fic.
I think i was high when i thought this up.
Italics are parody song lyrics.
Deidara was molding a clay sculpture in his room when his danna walked into the room.
There was something weird with Sasori, Deidara spoke up "Danna is.." He was stopped when Sasori slammed his hands down on the desk Deidara was sitting by. Before Deidara could speak, Sasori sang.
"Let's get down to business,.."
"Danna?"
"To defeat my sexual urges!"
"Danna?!" Instead of replying Sasori grabbed Deidara's wrist and dragged him to his adjoining room. Once they were in Sasori's room, Sasori spun around to look at Deidara. Sasori looked Deidara up and down with a scowl.
"Did they send me a seme, when i asked for a uke?"
Deidara was to stunned to speak when Sasori started singing again.
"You're the saddest uke i've ever met.
But you can bet when we're through...
That Deidara, i'll make a uke out of you."
Deidara opened his mouth to speak but before he could, Sasori slapped him and said "Bad uke!" Then continued singing.
"Lithe figure of a man, but a feminine passion within."
"What un!?" Sasori ignored him in favor of singing.
"Once you accept your sexuality, you will surely win.
You're a dominating, tan, confident man.
And you haven't a clue
Somehow i'll make a uke out of you!"
"How?! What?!" Deidara sputtered.
"Your ass will never catch a break
Say goodbye to your dominance
Dei, i was a fool not to claim you sooner
I fear it's too late
Let's hope there's still time
How i really wish i could fuck that ass now."
"Never!" A slap and "bad uke!" were given to Deidara.
"Be a uke
You must be as submitting as a woman
Be a uke
With all the cuteness of a kid
Be a uke
All the stamina of a whore
Adorable as a neko
"..." Deidara stayed silent. Sasori had a look of satisfaction.
"Time is racing towards my climax
Obey my every command and you might survive
You're unacceptable as a seme
So pout, get down on your knees, you're a uke.
Will i be able to make a uke out of you?"
"What the fuck, Danna?! "Don't go against your seme!"
I had way too much fun writing this. My failed attempt of humor and crack. Yes, i know the lyrics didn't rhyme.