Just something short and sweet I got inspired to write while listening to the song Stay by Rihanna. Happy Valentine's Day, guys. May have another short story like this to upload sometime tonight as well though not too sure which pairing it'll be or if I'll actually end up getting something else out for V-Day. Either way, I hope you guys like it :3
Dean let out a tired sigh as he downed the last of his whiskey and motioned to the bartender to get him a beer, part of him hoping Castiel would get back with some news so they could hurry and get this thing over with and he could get back to Sam while another part of him was hoping Castiel wouldn't go through with this.
At first he'd thought it was a great idea for Cas to lock up Heaven while he and Sam took care of slamming the gates to Hell, but now that he had a while to sit and think about it… All he could think about was the fact that if it worked then Castiel would be dragged back to Heaven and locked in with all the other angels, and he didn't want that to happen. Castiel was his friend, his family, and he wasn't stupid enough to think the angels wouldn't be even more pissed at him when they found out he was the reason they were all locked in Heaven. He didn't want him to get hurt no matter how pissed he'd been with the guy recently, and he couldn't help but worry about what might happen to him if he managed to complete the angel trials.
He was pulled from his thoughts when he suddenly heard footsteps coming up behind him, and he looked just to offer a soft smile when he noticed the angel making his way over. "Hey. You've been gone awhile. Anything?" he asked curiously.
"No. There was one female, but…" Castiel shrugged as he took a seat next to him.
"What?"
"I don't think she was female," the angel said simply. "Anything here?"
"Free drinks. Your, uh, buddy over there thinks you saved his life," Dean informed him, giving a small chuckle when he noticed Cas throw the guy a peace sign.
He shook his head as he slid the unopened beer over to his friend, feeling another smile tugging at his lips when he saw the angel cant his head to the side and give him that familiar confused look.
"Do you think it's wise to be drinking on the job?"
"What show you been watching?" he asked curiously, his smile faltering a bit when Castiel gave a bit of a sad sigh and looked away from him. "…Talk to me. Are sure about this? I mean, it's one thing for me and Sammy to be slamming the gates to the pit, but you? You're boarding up Heaven, and you're locking the door behind you."
Castiel pressed his lips as he opened the beer, pausing with it halfway to his lips before giving a small nod. "Yeah, I know," he said softly before taking a small drink.
"…You did a lot of damage up there, man. You think they're just gonna let that slide?"
"You mean, do I think they'll kill me?" Castiel asked as he turned to look at the hunter. "Yeah, they might."
Dean felt his chest ache as he stared into those soul-searching baby blues, and as they shared one of those looks they'd shared a hundred times before it finally seemed to hit him that this was it.
He'd never see that face again, never get to look into those gorgeous eyes, never get to see Castiel give that adorable head tilt while saying an exasperated 'I don't understand that reference, Dean' whenever he cracked a joke Castiel didn't get. He'd never be able to pray to him and ask for his help or even just to see him because he needed someone to talk to other than Sam, and he'd never feel the warm feeling he always had whenever Castiel came around because he wouldn't be coming back.
He took a shaky breath as it dawned on him that he didn't want to lose any of those things. It wasn't just a matter of worrying about something happening to Cas that he wouldn't be able to stop, it was the fact that he was going to be losing someone that had become an important constant in his life ever since he was pulled from the pit.
Somehow this dorky little angel had wormed his way into his heart, and even when he'd been pissed and wanting to beat the shit out of him to knock some sense into him it didn't change the fact that Castiel meant everything to him.
He'd had feelings for the guy he'd tried to push away and ignore because he didn't want to ruin a good friendship, or because there was never exactly a great time to tell him he was pretty sure he was head-over-heels for him, and then Cas went and ruined his trust in him by doing stupid shit and pissing him off so it made it easier to push away the feelings he had for him. And now he was about to not only lose his chance to ever grow a pair and tell him how he felt, but he was about to lose Cas.
"Dean?"
The hunter's eyes flicked up to the angel's face at the concerned tone of his voice, his chest tightening as he noticed him looking him over as though trying to figure out if he was hurt and if he could do something to fix it.
"Stay," he said suddenly.
Castiel blinked just to furrow his brows in confusion. "What do you mean?"
"Just… Stay. Don't finish the trials, Cas…"
The angel let out a small scoff in disbelief. "Dean, I can't just stop. I have to do this. I have to fix things."
"No, you don't. You don't have to do this."
"Yes, I do, Dean… It's my fault Heaven's so broken… What I did up there was horrible, and now I finally have a chance to set things right."
"By getting yourself killed?!" Dean snapped. "How is that gonna fix anything?!"
"I'm the one that caused all of this, Dean. I have to try to fix it, and if doing that gets me killed in the process then so be it."
"Why do you even care what happens to those dicks, huh?"
"They're my family."
"Bullshit. They haven't been your family for a long time."
"Dean," Castiel started in exasperation.
"No!" Dean cut him off. "They all turned their backs on you when you decided what they were doing during the apocalypse was wrong and you decided to help me and Sam stop it. They sent how many angels to kill you just because you were trying to help us? And then with that dick, Raphael-you had some on your side, sure, but how many were there that still wanted to see you dead? And now, the most recent one I can think of, that bitch that was controlling you and had you nearly kill me?
You don't turn your back on family, no matter how pissed you get at each other. You can yell at them and tell them when they're being stupid or what they're doing is wrong, but you don't turn your back on them when they need you most… As far as I'm concerned, me and Sam are your only real family…"
He shook his head just to reach out and grab one of the angel's hands and give it a gentle squeeze.
"Dean?" Castiel muttered in confusion.
"I want you to stay…" Dean said softly as he looked to the angel's eyes. "No, it's more than that actually… I need you to stay," he corrected himself as he laced their fingers together. "See, the thing is, it killed me when you were gone. The only thing that kept me from completely losing it was hoping you'd come back eventually, but if you do these trials you won't be able to come back this time…
I don't give a crap about what happens to the other angels, and I know if you don't shut down Heaven they'll still be a problem for us, but I don't care. I'd rather have them around and have to deal with their bullshit because you're with us than to have them gone and losing you in the process."
Castiel seemed to be at a loss for words as he stared at the hunter intently, his face twisting in confusion after a few moments as he shook his head. "I don't understand… Why would you want that when I can make sure the other angels won't ever be a problem for you again?"
"Because it's not worth it if you disappear with them."
Castiel shook his head again just to look down. "But…why would it matter if I was gone? You've been angry with me ever since…" he trailed off just to tightly clench his fists. "You should be happy I won't be around to screw something up again."
Dean's eyes gentled as he moved a hand up to grab the angel's chin and tilt his head up. "Just because I get pissed at you sometimes it doesn't mean I hate you or that I'd be glad if you were gone."
The angel frowned as he searched Dean's face. "Even so, that doesn't explain why you'd want me to-" he cut off, his breath hitching when Dean suddenly moved to cover his lips with his own.
"Get it now?" Dean whispered when he broke their kiss.
Castiel didn't answer and instead reached up to hesitantly cup the hunter's face and pull him back to his lips.
Dean couldn't help but smile into the kiss as he slid a hand around to the back of the other man's neck to hold him in place as he gently nibbled on his bottom lip. As soon as he heard the angel gasp he slipped his tongue past his lips to deepen the kiss, a small shiver running down his spine when he heard him make a soft noise in the back of his throat that sounded like a mix between a moan and a whimper.
He wasn't sure how long they kissed, Dean taking his time mapping out every inch of the angel's mouth while Castiel seemed to try and copy what he was doing, but when he finally decided he needed to breathe he broke their kiss and rested their foreheads together just to give a soft chuckle when Castiel leaned in to try and kiss him again.
"Hey, where's Ed?"
Dean's eyes flicked over to the bartender at the sound of his voice just to notice a woman had made her way into the bar with a beer delivery and she was giving Dwight a charming smile.
"Home with the flu. I'm Gail," she said softly.
Dean frowned as he watched Dwight ask to give her a hand and she smiled and thanked him, and he looked to Castiel just to hold his breath as he noticed him watching the woman intently.
Was he still going to go through with the trials if this turned out to be the match for Dwight they'd been waiting for? Even after everything he'd just said-after that kiss?
He turned his attention back to the bartender when he heard him introducing the woman to some guy that was sitting there, and he watched as she smiled at them both and reached out to touch their shoulders only to tell them she'd be seeing them again sometime.
He honestly felt relieved when the woman started to leave, hoping he'd have a bit more time to convince Castiel to give this whole trial thing up, only to freeze when both men suddenly saw something on the TV and commented on it at the same time just for Dwight to look at the guy and offer a flirty smile while saying the next round was on him.
Well then…that definitely explained why the bartender hadn't tried to bitch at him and Cas when they were making out, though that also meant that Gail had to have been a cupid… And if that was the case…
Dean nervously licked his lips as he looked back to Castiel to see him staring down at the bar as though he were deep in thought. "…Cas?" he called softly, honestly afraid to get his attention in case he snapped him out it and he decided they needed to hurry after the cupid.
The angel looked up just to stare into Dean's eyes, his gaze piercing him to his very core as though he were trying to look into Dean's very soul to find the answer to what was on his mind. "…I…I want to fix things in Heaven," he finally muttered, quickly reaching out and cupping the hunter's face to make him look at him when Dean tried to turn away. "But there's something else I want more-something I've wanted for a long time now."
Dean furrowed his brows in confusion. "What?"
Castiel gave a soft smile. "You."
The hunter's breath caught at that. "Yeah?"
Castiel nodded.
"You'll really stop the trials?"
"For you, yes. I only wanted to do something to help because Heaven was once my home and it's in shambles because of me, and I figured fixing it would not only set things right up there but also give you a reason to no longer be furious with me… Even if I wouldn't have been able to see you again, it would've been enough knowing you at least didn't hate me anymore."
"I've never hated you, Cas. Gotten furious and wanted to stab you a few times because I know it won't kill you, but I've never hated you," he admitted before getting to his feet. "Now, what do you say we get out of here?"
"I think that would be a good idea seeing as how we no longer have reason to be here," the angel agreed with a warm smile as he took Dean's hand and allowed him to lead him out of the bar.