Title: Remake of Twilight

PG-13

A/N: So this is something I wrote with paramorefan while we were at a concert in school one day. Our only rule was no rules at all, so any spelling or grammar mistakes are purposeful. This was made mainly for our own amusement, so it's really cracky and doesn't really make much sense. Without further ado, I present a Twlight crack-fic extraordinaire, complete with brief House crossover. Bold is me Underlined is paramorefan

Remake of Twilight

Or What Happens When Two Really Bored People Try to Write a Fanfic

Rosalie, an amazing 19 years old, a beautiful brunette, white teeth girl who was at school.

"Oh my god, school!" she squealed.

Then her brother Edward came over.

"I'm moody today," he grumbled.

Edwards came close to Emmett frozen at the moment. Alice a pretty 18 year girl.

"I can haz seeing the future?" Alice asked.

"Okee dokee!" the mother Esme

"Oh my god Alice" Rosalie said acting stupid.

"Stop it Rosalie" Carlisle said, so sexy.

"Hi guyz!" Edward girlfriend Bella was chirping. "how is my favourite vampires I mean normal types?"

"Bella you are a bitch" Rosalie said

Bella started crying.

"You bitch!" Edward tells "My girl is sad now"

Edward hiss and jump on Rosalie, fangs all up in her grillz

Alice met Jasper in the kitchen with Esme in some random way

Back to Edward and Rosalie. Bella jump in the middle last second and Edward bite her by accidentally

"Oh noes!"

Bella fall dead

"Oh my god bella!" Charlie and Jacob said. Jacob the werewolf that he already stood there.

"Don't be worrying!" Edward say "Look look!"

And Bella is to be changing standing up new vampire like and fangs

"Yay!" Bella said being a bitch.

"You trick me bitch" Edward he pouting "I'm leaving

Bella drink Charlie blood

"Yum!"

Jacob laughed his ass off then he killed himself

Suddenly a doctor by the named Gregory House was there and Wilson two

"He be dead" house say

Cancer!" say Wilson

House bitch slap Wilson

"Owie!" Wilson be sad

"Shut the fuck up" gangster said shooting up a bitch

Edwards be near Wilson now for drinking of blood redness

"Noooo! Wilson!" house be crying of dead friend. And then bella to be killing house also

Oh and were in Forks by the way

THE END!!!!!!

A/N2: Well that's our crack-fic. I hope you liked it and, if you didn't, I don't really care. Go one and flame me, I love reading them.