I Want You (To Take Over Control)

Summary: Desperate to feel something, Bella became a reckless, making bad decisions, and dragging Jacob a long for the ride. But after her reckless behavior almost gets her killed. Bella doesn't want to decide anymore and she asks Jacob to take over. Dom!Jacob and Sub!Bella

Chapter One: Can You Control Me?

"I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don't mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don't mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding."
― Anaïs Nin

Bella sat in the hospital bed, her right arm in a sling, staring at her blanket. The lecture Charlie gave her was still ringing in her ears. He couldn't believe that she'd thought it was a good idea to go cliff diving…alone…in the middle of a storm.

Jacob had been upset to. Not about the cliff diving part, she'd already suggested it and he'd agreed. It was the 'Alone' part that bugged him. She had promised him that they would do it together and then she'd gone ahead without him.

It was stupid. But so was every decision she'd made in since Edward left. At first, it had been about hearing Edward's voice, but that had stopped a while ago. So, why was she still doing dangerous things? What was wrong with her?

Charlie left the room, after informing her that she was grounded, and Bella didn't argue.

She was tired.

She was tired of reckless. She was tired of dangerous. She was tired of trying to prove that she could make it on her own. It was obvious she couldn't do it anymore.

She was ready to let someone else take control. She was ready to let someone else make the decisions. She had spent her childhood constantly having to make the right decisions for her mother. Then she spent a few months with Edward taking the pressure off. He and his family had managed to keep her reigned in, letting her put up just enough fight to pretend she was in control while patiently holding her leash to keep her from jumping off cliffs.

Now, she was too free and there was no one to hold her back. No one to—

"Are you okay?" Jacob asked, interrupting her thoughts, and Bella looked at him, as if seeing him for the first time.

Jacob had been by her side this whole, going along with her crazy ideas, taking her to the hospital when she was hurt, making her laugh even when she wanted to cry. Jacob was the person she trusted most in the world right now.

But would asking him be taking advantage? She knew he had feelings for her. Would changing the dynamic of their relationship be a good idea? So far, she had been calling the shots and Jacob had just come along for the ride.

Bella almost jumped out of her skin when Jacob laid his hand over her free one. Bella looked up at Jacob again and he gave her a concerned look.

"Bella?" Jacob repeated her name, softly, squeezing her hand gently.

Bella's eyes filled with tears, as she realized how in over her head she was. She felt ashamed of herself for even considering asking. Jacob had his own life. He had a father to take care of, other friends to see, and school work to be doing. How could she possibly ask him to make her decisions? What would he say?

Bella bit her lip, looking away again, as a few tears slid down her face.

"Hey, honey, don't cry," Jacob sat on the edge of her bed, "Talk to me. Does your arm still hurt? Do you need me to get the nurse?"

Bella shook her head, and laid it on his shoulder, her tears soaking into his shirt.

"What do you need from me, Bella?" Jacob patted her back, and suddenly it all came bursting free.

"Control," Bella blurted, and she felt Jacob tense.

"What?" Jacob questioned, and Bella hurried to explain.

"I can't do it anymore, Jake. I thought I could, but…could you? Would you… control me?" Bella said, quickly, burying her face further into his shoulder, embarrassed.

There was a long silence between them and Bella was about to take it back, when Jacob placed his hands on her shoulders, pushing her away to look her in the face.

Bella expected to see disgust or confusion, but Jacob's brown eyes were warm and full of understanding. He cupped Bella's face in his hands, a flicker of uncertainty crossing his face.

"Is that really what you want from me, Bells?" Jacob asked, softly, eyes scanning her face.

"Yes." The word tumbled out of her mouth, before she could second guess herself, "No…I don't want it. I need it."

"Okay," Jacob took a deep breath, "What kind of…? I mean, how much control do you want me to have?"

"As much as possible," Bella said, starting to relax now that he'd agreed.

"Bella, this is serious," Jacob said, his eyes turning sharp, "You need to be more specific and we need to set up boundaries."

"I don't know how to explain," Bella glanced behind him at her open hospital door, where people were walking around, "I just want you to tell me what to do. I feel so lost. Like I'm drowning and no matter how much I try to swim the water keeps pulling me under and—"

"Bella," Jacob said her name, calmly, "You have to tell me what you expect from me. I don't want there to be any misunderstandings later, alright?"

Bella paused, and tried to put her thoughts into words.

"I need to know that someone's in control. These past few months, I've been out of control and I want you to..." Bella trailed off, "Just tell me what to do,"

"Bella, we go to different schools and I usually don't see you until the afternoon." Jacob gave her a patient smile, "How am I going to tell you what to do when I'm not there?"

"We could set up rules," Bella said, "Things to help me get through my day to day. At least until we see each other,"

"You can't just spend the whole day doing whatever I tell you." Jacob shook his head and Bella gave him a look.

"Why not?" she asked, and something sparked in Jacob's eyes.

"Get some rest, Bella," he ordered, gently, "Be good for the doctors and do whatever they tell you. I'm going to go do some research and I'll figure out how to make this work, alright honey?"

Bella nodded, the hole in her chest closing slightly.

"Thank you," she whispered, before closing her eyes and resting.

Just as he ordered.

Author's note: This was actually supposed to be a story about Victoria and Riley, where Victoria got used to Riley making decisions for her and didn't want him to stop. But I changed my mind and decided to go with Bella and Jacob

Jacob is not a werewolf yet. Bella tried to cliff dives a few months after she saw Sam doing it.