Remus Lupin shared a bitter smile with the table, tightening his grip on his drink, his head lowered towards the table and his tousled sandy brown hair hanging into his face. He hadn't ever felt so empty, so lonely, in all of his life. Misery had become a common emotion in the last few decades. The first hadn't been kind, with the loss of his friends, and the cold winter months that followed hadn't been good for him. Death Eater activity had blown up half the country in blood and gore, and Remus, in his state of grief, had ignored all calls for help from the Order. Without his friends, Remus Lupin had nothing left in his life that was worth celebrating anymore… nothing was worth living for anymore.
Leaning against the wall next to him would be Marlene McKinnon, flashing her trademark smile around the room. Marlene's smile was sweet and soft, but it could turn mischievous, wicked, mirthful or cunning. Maybe her cornflower blue eyes would flicker around the room before settling on her friends and that beautiful smile would widen as she shot forward with her Seeker abilities and snatch up Lily's butterbeer. She'd reach up and run a hand through her thick blonde curls and pull her hood up as they began to get up and walk.
He stood up, finished his drink and tossed it over the bar to the bartender before walking out of the room in the same way that he would have done with them. Maybe then he'd walk with a little more spring in his step or a wide grin on his face. Now, his face was miserable and his feet dragged in the snow behind him.
Running ahead of them would be his old flame, Kate Alastor. Her long auburn hair would be tossed over one shoulder, her voice caught in the wind behind her as she cartwheeled and leapt over puddles of ice. She'd turn around and face him, her trademark mischievous grin spreading her face as her smoky grey eyes fixed on him; her glove-clad fingers catching his and dragging him into the head of the group, sprinting in front of the group, snow setting in her hair and making her even more beautiful to him.
James Potter would whoop and vault himself over the top of a bench, yelling loudly when his feet skidded over the icy spots on the roads as he landed. He'd reach up and drag a hand through his thick unruly dark locks, and when he looked at Lily his hazel eyes would light up behind a pair of wire-rimmed rectangular shaped glasses and a spark would ignite as he slung an arm around Lily and Sirius, coming between them and laughing uproariously as Kate slipped and crashed into a tree.
Lily Evans would grab James' hand on her shoulder and roll her eyes, but she would snuggle her head of dark red hair into his shoulder. Her emerald eyes would glow in the winter sunshine, snow setting on her shoulders and her hair, giving her an unearthly beauty that would make James inch just that little bit closer. She'd reach up on her tip toes in her leather boots and press a kiss to his cheek, right on top of the bruise that would be there from his latest brawl with Snape, Mulciber and Avery.
Behind them, Sirius Black would roll his eyes and cheer as he landed a cartwheel for the first time, but Kate would press his head down and leap-frog over his head, cackling and causing him to bark with laughter when they both straightened. His light grey eyes would brighten with mischief as he grabbed Peter's shoulder and spun him around, kicking his legs out from underneath him and causing him to land on his backside on the ice. Sirius would raise a hand to his messy black hair and ruffle it up, grinning wolfishly as Marlene snuck under his arm and kissed his cheek.
Lagging towards the back of the group would be Peter Pettigrew. He kept to himself, but what he had to say whenever he spoke was often quite intelligent. James and Sirius mostly kept him around for someone who would worship them, but Remus found that Peter was a good friend and was honest and kind. He wasn't handsome like the rest of them, but he was quite boyishly attractive with his light blonde hair and watery blue eyes and round face.
"Remus," said a soft voice from his left, and he turned into the face of the owner of the pub, who he hadn't noticed had followed him. Emma had been a good friend of theirs since their second year and her eighteen year old self had hidden them from their teachers when they'd snuck into her pub in Hogsmeade. She was tall, with long straight locks of blonde hair and beautiful blue eyes that glimmered at him, swimming with tears. She'd been as close with Kate, Lily and Marlene as he'd been with James, Sirius and Peter, so he could understand her pain.
"You can't wallow in your memories, Remus," she said quietly, patting his shoulder and removing her Gryffindor scarf so she could wrap it around him. "If you let them consume you, you'll never find the happiness that you should seek out in life. I won't let you sink into the oblivion that I've let my family sink into. Come on, we'll go up to my house. It's just up on the end of the road."
Remus nodded wordlessly, allowing the older woman to take his arm and guide him out of the street and towards a simple bungalow that looked more like a gingerbread house than the home of a pub landlord. He mentally stored where she lived in case he ever needed her – she was the last one left that had known that he was a werewolf and hadn't cared even a little bit. Upon opening the front door, she guided him through a homely hallway that was lined with photos – a fair few featuring himself and the other Marauders – and into a kitchen.
"Would you like some hot chocolate? It's freezing outside," said Emma, pushing him into one of her white kitchen chairs, moving over to the stove once she'd shrugged out of her coat, leaving it on the table and grinning at him over her shoulder.
"No thanks, Em," he said, shrugging off his coat. "I've learnt to adapt to the cold."
Emma frowned as she sat down across from him, sliding him a mug of hot chocolate anyways.
"I know that it hurts, Remus," she said quietly, her voice soothing to his ears as her hand grasped his. "But wallowing in memories isn't going to make anything better. Yes, I know that the people you love are the hardest to let go of when they're gone, but… Remus, you can't throw your life away. There are so many people in this world that are willing to hear you out, but if you push them out then they won't come back for you when you finally wake up and realise how stupid you're being. I'm always here and never again will I allow you to be alone."
"Emma, I can't forget everything that they've done for me," he began heatedly, glaring as he slammed his mug on the tabletop, "they were my family - !"
"I'm not telling you to forget, Remus Lupin, I'm telling you to move on," Emma cut him off, her hand squeezing his. "When I lost my family, I wrote down all of my feelings in a diary and later on, I filled up a whole book that was about this thick," she chuckled as she held her hands wide apart, "with my memories from the time I met them to when I lost them. It helped me move on and open up my pub, and when I met you and the other Marauders it was a dream come true because you helped me. Being around people makes things better, even if they're not the people you want to be with."
Remus nodded. "I'm not the diary kind of person, though."
Emma laughed and shook her head. "You don't have to be, love. Just write everything down as you remember it, make sure that if no one hears you now, someone will in the future and your memories will go on to whoever you hand that book to. It helps you get your feelings off your chest and reminds you that you're not alone – ever."
"I don't have a diary," he protested, shaking his head. He couldn't remember everything, because it would only hurt him more to remember meeting them, loving them and then losing over and over again.
"You do now, Moony," Emma slid him a plain scarlet book, with a Gryffindor lion in the top right corner and, when he opened up the first page, written in Emma's neat, loopy handwriting were the words I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good. "Open it up to the last page," she said quietly, and he did so without question. Mischief Managed was inscribed into the back cover of the book.
"Emma," he breathed, blinking tears out of his eyes. "Thank you so much."
"Honey, it's my pleasure," Emma stood up and shrugged on her coat. "Let's go. I want to show you something that Hannah, Daniel and I did."
He stood and copied her, hooking his arm through hers. Spinning on her heel, Remus heard Emma murmur, "Godric's Hollow Graveyard."
Remus Lupin and Emma Quirke landed with a thud in the middle of the Godric's Hollow graveyard, and the first thing that Remus saw was the arc of tombstones that sat before him.
JAMES POTTER LILY POTTER
BORN 23RD MARCH 1960 BORN 3OTH JANUARY 1960
DIED 31ST OCTOBER 1981 DIED OCTOBER 31ST 1981
The Last Enemy To Be Destroyed Is Death
This tombstone was the newest, and stood in the middle of the arc.
KATHERINE MARIE ALASTOR
BORN 14TH FEBRUARY 1960
DIED 18TH MARCH 1981
Who Lived And Died With A Smile On Her Face
Remus' eyes filled with tears as he spotted the oldest grave, right next to James and Lily's.
MARLENE GRACE MCKINNON
BORN 31ST JUNE 1960
DIED 18TH MARCH 1981
Never Shall Your Love Be Forgotten
He collapsed to his knees upon spotting Marlene's grave, sitting on the opposite side of the Potters' to Kate's.
PETER DANIEL PETTIGREW
BORN 13TH MAY 1960
DIED MARCH 1998
Traitor, Betrayer – But Always Remembered, Wormtail
Remus slammed his fists into the ground upon seeing the grave set apart from the rest, right next to Marlene's.
SIRIUS ORION BLACK
BORN 12TH DECEMBER 1959
DIED 18TH JUNE 1996
Wrongly Convicted, True To The End, Sirius Black – True Marauder
Remus was startled to see the gap between Kate's and Sirius' graves, and when he turned to Emma with a questioning look on her face, she grimaced.
"That will be for you, when you eventually go," she explained, sinking to her knees beside him. "I know it seems sinister now, but… we thought you'd like to be with them, when you leave us forever."
"No," he rasped in a voice he couldn't recognise, overcome with emotion. "Thank you."
And he picked up that diary and began to write.
Months later, just after Remus Lupin finished the diary, a new grave appeared.
REMUS JOHN LUPIN
BORN 10TH MARCH 1960
DIED 29TH SEPTEMBER 1998
Mischief Managed.
Emma found his diary and read it from start to finish. Never again would any of the Marauders be alone. Instead, they had each other, and that was the way that it should have been.
This is the diary that I was left once Remus died. I never meant to read it, but I couldn't help it. This story is tragic and full of fighting and loss – but it's also a story of happiness, love and finding the strength inside of you in order to begin to trust. Most importantly, this is the story of the Marauders.
- Emma Quirke
Erm... Hi?
Don't hit me, don't hit me!
Okay, so I've been publishing a lot of new stories lately instead of finishing the ones I already have. I know, I'm lacking in the updating department; but this story idea has eaten away at me for months and months and months and months and I want to repeatedly hit myself over the head with a hammer. Be proud of me because I haven't... yet.
My point is: I love this story already, and welcome to the reading of one of my favourite babies so far. It's a little cliché, and yes, Emma Quirke is an embodiment of me. Shameless self-insert there, I know. But Emma isn't really that big of a character in the story, so... yeah.I know that I've invented characters. I don't honestly care.
Please read and make sure to read a review! This is the first part of the series, as there are two parts. The sequel will be titled 'Mischief Managed' and will basically be the 'after Hogwarts' stage for the Marauders and company.
Glad we got that straight.
Another thing: when I fail to update when promised, please don't hit me. Just throw a brick and then be happy because I'll do a Tris and let it hit me in the face (well, Tris got hit in the ear, so it's completely different, but then again, just ignore me).
REVIEW!
Love,
Marlene