So me and my good chum, Tex, were reading some fanfics and then john travolta walked in and asked if we wanted to join the sea organization. I replied by saying "fuck you and your grease lightning. Get out of my house." Then we walked to walgreens to buy some butter rum nips (thats a real candy. Look it up). Some weird guy came up to us and asked if he could take a picture of our feet, but then tex senpai went into her mildly tereifying hidden ghetto mode and said "Bitch, I hope the fuck you do. Get up on outta here with my eyeholes!" So he did. Then we walked home and played some punk ass rock on our ukuleles. God dammit, autocorrect! Stop censoring my cuss words! If I dont sound like a 12 year old who has just discovered the word "fuck", nobody is going to read my fanfics! Anyways, after our jam session, tex started texting her boyfriend aka the queen of all cunts and I was mad and upset just like Carl in that other fanfic I wrote. I said "tex, why dont u luv me" and she was all like "carlton pls I need to finish my leonard nemoy shrine just shut up for like five seconds." So I shut up for like five seconds and then we took a nap because I'm too lazy to write anything that doesn't suck.

Timeskip brought to you by the power of not giving a fuck

After our nap, we went to the park. The reason I wanted to go there was because I had an important confession to make. I ship myself with tex. I just needed to know if she shipped us too. I led her over to a park bench and started playing "beans" by kurt cobain to add to the romantic atmosphere. I looked up at her because I'm fukn smol as shit and I began reciting a poem she had made up earlier in the year. "F is for FUCK ME, DADDY! U is for ur dick in my ass. N is for nonstop pounding into me down here in the sex dungeon." I blushed as red as a tomato because that's how fanfiction works and I said "tex senpai, we're my otp. We have been for quite some time. Will you be my waifu?" To which she replied "fuck off." but then u offered her some nips and she reluctantly agreed.

And then they fucked.

The end