1.
Weekends used to be a blur of working out and catching up on work. He'd finish the weekday with a glass of scotch in his apartment, the soft jazz of his father's records the only thing keeping him company. He'd wake up the next day and go for a run or to the gym for a few rounds of boxing. And for a while this was enough. Until it wasn't.
This is how his weekend looks now.
Friday nights consist of shitty Thai takeouts and a particular redhead. They'd curl up on his couch and talk about everything and nothing. The night always ends with mind blowing sex that bleeds into the early hours of the morning and she'll stay for breakfast and well, he hopes she'll stay forever.
"God, with the way he was talking you'd think he was trying to name his kid or something but no he was trying to name the cat he and Sheila adopted last week," she chatters away, her legs thrown over his lap. She's traded her usual designer dresses for his old Harvard sweatshirt that stops just before her knees, hair twisted up with loose curls framing her face with no makeup.
He loves the way she looks and feels completely at home in his apartment. There are bits of her everywhere. The colorful mug on his kitchen counter next to his plain white ones. Her books on his nightstand. Her clothes hung next to his in the closet. It's funny because he's lived here for so long but the place never really felt like home until she comes along. He likes to think that it's because this place isn't home. She is.
Here in the dim lighting of his- no, their home, her hair looks like a deeper shade of red, like blazing fire, a stark contrast to their surroundings. It's fitting, he thinks. Her hair matches her fiery personality.
As he listens to her talk about their friend, he watches the way her hazel eyes light up, the way they crinkle when she laughs. He falls in love with her all over again as the Manhattan skyline fades into a kaleidoscope of lights behind her.
"I mean, what kind of person would willingly name their cat Hamlet. Even I wouldn't-" Her words come to a halt as she notices the look on his face. "What?" she asks.
Marry me, he wants to say. He thinks about the ring he has hidden on the highest shelf in his closet, one that he knows she can't reach.
Not yet.
"I love you," he says instead.
The way her whole face softens at his words is enough. The way he can feel her grin against his mouth as their lips meet is enough too.
For now at least.
2.
He doesn't think he's ever seen her this giddy before. There's a child like excitement radiating from her as they make their way through the hospital, trying to find Mike and Rachel's room. Their hands are full with the gifts she insisted they get for their newborn goddaughter.
"We don't need to give all of these to them now, Donna." He tries to persuade her.
"Nonsense, they're gonna love them."
And that's how he ended up here with a teddy bear and a bouquet of roses on his left arm and a paper bag filled with other gifts on his right. He points to a door at the end of the hall, her face lighting up as he does so. She gives him one last giddy smile before knocking on the door. Seconds later, an exhausted but happy looking Mike Ross opens the door.
"Well if it isn't the godparents," Harvey hears the younger man say as they step into the room.
Harvey leans in to give him a hug. "How are you feeling, buddy?"
"Exhausted but it's worth it, man. She's perfect." Mike looks like a mess but there is a happiness to him that Harvey finds himself wanting to have.
"Where is the little bundle of joy?" Donna is practically bouncing now, ignoring the new father in favor of the baby girl currently situated in her mother's arms. She drops the gifts and her purse on the couch and makes a beeline for her best friend.
Rachel hands her the tiny, wrapped up human. "You're just in time. She's still awake from her last feeding."
Harvey watches as Donna gently takes the baby in her arms, the biggest, beautiful smile gracing her features. He's pretty sure he has the same dopey smile on his face at the sight of the love of his love cradling a newborn baby. He walks over to her and puts a hand on her waist, the other reaching out to touch the little girl in her arms. His grin grows even more as he feels her grasp his index finger, her tiny hands wrapped around one of his larger ones.
"Meet little Emily." Rachel is beaming with excitement and pride as she introduces her daughter to them.
Donna lets out another series of awws and cooing for a couple of minutes before glancing up at him, "Wanna hold her?" she offers, still in the softest tone he's ever heard from her. He looks at Rachel for permission and at the nod of her head he opens up his arms. As she gently transfers Emily to his arms, Donna feels her heart skip a beat at how easy and natural this feels. Holding a baby with him. She quickly tampers down the longing before anyone notices. They haven't even properly talked about this yet. Sure, they both know they're it for each other but still, it's too much too soon for them, regardless of how perfect it feels.
Pushing her thoughts to the back of her head, Donna turns to focus on Rachel, asking her how she's doing and making sure she's not in pain. Their conversation is cut short when the baby starts to whine a little in Harvey's arms. Out of pure instinct, Harvey gently sways on the spot.
"Hey, you're okay," he whispers to the delicate bundle in his arms.
He feels himself overcome with emotions then, gazing at the child in his arms. He lets his mind wander for a little while. About what their future could be. And apparently, she's thinking about the same thing because when he looks up, she's staring at him with the most tender expression, her eyes a little glassy.
An understanding passes between them.
One day.
There in Mike and Rachel's hospital room, holding his newborn goddaughter, Harvey swears he almost asked her to marry him. But he's not gonna steal their best friend's thunder. No, he's gonna do it right.
Soon, he thinks to himself.
3.
The wedding is in full swing now. He's standing near the open bar, making small talk with Jessica and Samantha but his mind is somewhere else as he searches for her in the sea of people in front of him. She's standing at the other side of the room, making small talk with Sheila's cousins, working her magic on everyone. It's not the first time he's seen her that night but the sight of her in that jaw-dropping navy backless gown steals his breath every time.
Following his line of vision, Samantha lets out a chuckle. "Looking for someone in particular? Our resident COO, perhaps?" She has a knowing smirk as she teases him, clearly amused at the sight.
He throws her a faux unimpressed look before she continues, "She's really something else, isn't she?"
You have no idea, a voice in his head says.
"Oh, she's something else alright," Jessica chimes in. Her voice softens a bit as she speaks up again. "Took you crazy kids long enough." Harvey smiles at that.
He excuses himself, making his way over to the woman who's been occupying his mind the whole night. The whole 14 years they've known each other actually. As if she can sense him, she turns her head to find him striding towards here, her lips breaking into a smile.
He takes her in, dress hugging her body in all the right places, the generous slit that stops mid thigh, and the sway of her hips as she meets him in the middle. "I'm sorry, do we know each other?" he jokes, offering his hand to her.
She shakes her head at his antics but keeps it up nonetheless. "Not yet, but today is your lucky day." Placing her hand in his, she lets him guide her to the dancefloor.
"And why is that?"
"Because it's the day you get to dance with Donna," she throws a quip at him, eyes twinkling with mirth.
"Let me guess. You're Donna." He pulls her in his arms then, one hand at the small of her back and the other holding one of hers.
"Oh, you have no idea how 'Donna' I am," she whispers softly into his ear, her head on his shoulder. Their current situation takes her back to another wedding, another them. It feels different but all the same anyway.
Their little banter brings out a laugh from him. The amount of happiness he feels right here in this moment with her shouldn't be legal. He could only hope he makes her half as happy as she makes him. He pulls away a little from their intimate embrace, an adoring look on his face as he says, "Have I told you how amazing you look tonight?"
"Only about 50 times in the last, oh I don't know, 3 hours maybe?" she retorts, trying not to blush at his compliment. She still hasn't gotten used to this, to him complimenting her so freely, calling her beautiful at random points in the day.
"Well, I'm saying it again. You look absolutely devastating." She kisses him instead of replying, tugging lightly at his bottom lip.
She reels him back in as they pull away, this time looping both of her hands around his neck. His hands on her waist feel like anchors. His arms around her feel like home. Times like these she can't remember how they were before they allowed themselves to love each other, to freely touch with fearing for consequences. The world around them fades into a blur as they lose themselves in each other.
They don't talk for some time, simply holding each other and swaying lightly to the music. It is him who breaks the silence first. "Can I ask you something?" He doesn't pull away.
Never one to ask permission before talking, she's intrigued by his sudden shyness but she too doesn't pull away. Their bodies are still pressed together. Cheek to cheek. Chest to chest.
"Since when do you ask?"
She feels him draw a little breath before he voices out his next question. "Hypothetically speaking," he hesitates, clearly nervous about something, "What would you do if I asked you to marry me?"
Caught off guard, Donna's heart stops beating for a moment, movement halting. She pulls away but keeps him close, hands on his arm.
"What?" She breathes out.
"You heard me." The playful tone tries to cover up the fact that he's scared shitless but she's always been able to read him like a book. He gently nudges her, swaying them both lightly with the arm on her waist.
"Is this you proposing?" Her voice comes out in an anxious whisper.
"No, I'm asking you what you would do in a hypothetical situation."
Ever the lawyer, she thinks. Letting out a shaky breath, she clears her throat before speaking up. "Hypothetically speaking," she tilts her head to meet his piercing gaze, "If you were to ask, I would say yes." Her voice was low, only for him to hear.
He presses his lips together in an attempt to fight off the Chesire cat grin from taking over. "Okay," he says as if he didn't just pop the question, feigning nonchalance.
"Okay," she mimics him. She turns her gaze away from him and to the happy couple in the middle of the dancefloor. Louis is dipping Sheila, who's giggling uncontrollably, high on champagne and each other.
She thinks it could be them one day. Him spinning her around the dancefloor surrounded by their loved ones. It could be her standing in a beautiful white gown. Rachel would be her maid of honor and Mike would be his best man.
She can't wait.
4.
If you had told the Harvey Specter of last year that he would find a drunk Donna Paulsen sitting in front of his front door, he'd roll his eyes at you and call you delusional.
But that's exactly what present Harvey Specter finds when he opens his door after a series of loud banging.
Donna is on the floor, sans heels and clearly intoxicated judging from the way she questions him. "Why are you all the way up there?" She narrows her eyes at him, as if trying to figure out why he seems so tall all of a sudden.
Holding back a laugh, he extends out an arm and pulls her to her feet. "Babe, you're on the floor," he announces. This only seems to confuse Donna more. "How did I get here?" Her words come out in slurs.
"I don't know, Don but let's get you inside, yeah?" He guides her through his loft, hand around her much smaller frame to stabilize her in her bambi like state.
"Can you check on Katrina and Sam and make sure they're okay?" she pleads with him, stopping him with a hand to his chest. This brings a sudden surge of fondness throughout his body. Even in her intoxicated state, she's still looking out for everyone.
"Yes, I promise. Now will you please sit down before you trip?"
He deposits her on the kitchen stool and shakes his head affectionately at the way she clambers up to sit on the counter instead. As she begins to babble about her adventures with the other ladies, he reaches for the cupboard to get a glass and fills it with water. Harvey rather likes the simplicity of their current situation. Taking care of Donna after a night out isn't something he imagined ever doing but he doesn't mind. He doesn't mind it one bit. He likes seeing her so unguarded and bubbly. If he wasn't already in love with this drunken mess of a woman, this moment right here would've done it.
He makes the call to check on the other partners, putting them on speaker so Donna could hear. Satisfied that they're okay, Donna takes the glass of water from him and downs it in one gulp.
Making his way around the counter, he lets her pull him closer with her legs as he comes to stand in front of her. Now trapped between her thighs, he runs his hand from where her knees meet her thighs up to her waist. He feels her arms go around his shoulder, burying her head on the crook of his neck.
"I missed you today. Feel like I barely saw you," she mumbles, fingers toying with the hair on the back of his neck. Feeling his hands stroking up and down her back, she struggles to keep her eyes open. Pressing his lips to her cheek, he tightens his hold on her. Both lets out a content sigh at the feeling of their bodies pressed together. Harvey was never big on hugs but with her he takes comfort in them. Takes comfort in the way she makes him feel safe. Feel loved.
With you it's different.
"Marry me," he hears her say.
Wait, what?
"What did you just say?"
She shrugs her shoulders as if it's nothing. "I love you. Let's get married."
"Babe," he raises his hands to her face, heart constricting as she nuzzles into his palm, "You're drunk."
"Yeah, I am. But I love you." She pouts at him and in that moment Harvey's sure there isn't anything he wouldn't do for this woman.
"Okay, Casanova. Let's get you in bed and we'll see if you still wanna have this conversation in the morning." He hoists her off the counter, her legs wrapped around his waist. She lets out a shriek that morphs into uncontrollable giggles as he walks them into the bedroom.
Dropping her unceremoniously on the bed, he stops to take in his current view. Wriggling around trying to find the zipper of her own dress, she sure is a sight.
Later when they're both in bed, him on his back with half of her body draped over him. He'll hear her whisper, "I meant what I said you know." He'll drop a kiss to her forehead in response and whisper back, "I know you do."
She ends up not remembering anything in the morning. But that's okay.
He'll tell her this story after they get engaged.
5.
The ding of the elevator shakes Harvey from his thoughts, signaling that he's arrived on the 50th floor. The office is deserted as it's already 9 pm. He steps out and makes his way to his office, passing by hers and frowns slightly upon finding that she's not there.
Her text was plain and simple.
Meet me in your office when you're done.
The only thing he wants to do right now is go home and curl up with his girlfriend in bed but apparently she has other ideas.
As his office comes into view, he spots her near his record shelf, back turned to him. He lingers at the door, appreciating the way she moves around his office as if it's hers. His mouth curls upward when he realizes she's holding the infamous Miles Davis record.
"Taking a stroll down memory lane?"
He knows he's startled her when she visibly jumps out of her skin. She turns around to find him smirking at her. The idiot.
"You do that again and I'm gonna make you sleep on the couch." She tries to sound harsh but the happy look she's currently sporting gives her away.
"Oh, please. Like you would ever willingly let me sleep in a different room," he countered.
"Wanna bet?" she challenges him but she knows he's right. They've rarely spent a night apart since that fateful night at her apartment and she doubts they'll ever be able to get back to sleeping alone.
"So," he walks over to where she's standing and takes the record off her hands to play it, "What's so important that we have to be here right now instead of home where we both know we'd rather be?"
Her face lights up as she remembers the reason why she called him here in the first place. Clasping her hands together, she moves to stand in the center of the room.
"Okay, so I know that your birthday was last month," She's practically bouncing now, radiating so much excitement that he can't help but get curious.
"And?" he presses.
"And I wanted to get you something special because well we're together now and even though I don't need any-"
"Donna, just spit it out," he says, amused by her babbling.
"I got your painting back," she exclaims.
That's when he sees it. The rectangular object covered up by a white sheet situated on his couch.
It couldn't be.
"Turns out Stemple gave it away not long after you gave it to him. It took me a while to track it down but I managed. It was supposed to be your birthday present but it took longer than I expected so," she trails off, the silence from Harvey's part concerning her a little.
"Harvey?"
"You-you got my mother's painting back?" He feels a lump forming in his throat.
"Yeah and I know you made amends with her and everything but I thought-" He cuts her off again. This time by sweeping her off her feet and into his arms.
Burying his head in her hair, he expels a shaky breath. The amount of love he has for this woman right now is overwhelming him. He can't believe she really took the time to do it. "God, do you have any idea how much I love you?" his voice cracks as he said it.
"Yeah, I think I might have an idea," she whispers in his ear, clearly taken aback by the hug.
He kisses her when they pull away, tries to put everything he felt into it. They only broke apart when the need for air becomes too much. Resting their foreheads together, Donna brushes the tears that escaped him. "Go check it out."
Moments later, they're standing in the exact position they were in years ago, with him watching her adjust the painting. They're a different them now. He doesn't have to go home without her after this unlike the last time they'd been here. He can tell her he loves, which is exactly what he does as she glances his way, looking for approval.
"I love you."
This would've been the perfect moment to propose to her. But he doesn't.
Not yet.
She deserves the perfect proposal and that's what he's gonna give her.
Oh, yeah. He's definitely gonna marry this woman before the year is out.
+1.
They've formed this sort of routine over the past couple of months. One of them would come to the other's office and wait for them to finish. It's usually Harvey though. The man never misses an opportunity to watch her work. But this time it's her.
He's looking at her from his desk. With her suit jacket and heels off, she looks far more relaxed than she did during the day. She's seated on the chaise lounger next to his desk with her tablet on her lap, long legs stretched out in front of her. He thanks his lucky stars for the white suit Donna's wearing right now. Don't get him wrong, Donna in a designer dress is a sight but Donna in a suit? Yeah, he's pretty much a goner.
"Take a picture, Harvey. It'll last longer," she deadpans.
Holding back a smile, he closes up his laptop for the night. He walks over the record player, taking out the record and exchanging it with a slower one.
"Dance with me." He pulls her to her feet, the absence of her heels making her look up at him.
"Why?" She questions him but follows his lead anyway.
"Because I want to dance with you."
He pulls her close and they stay that way for a couple of moments. Her arms looped around his neck. His draped on her lower back. Swaying lightly to the soft jazz of Gordon Specter's saxophone, Harvey thinks of them. He thinks of her, in his office dancing with him. Of waking up next to her in the morning. Of drifting off to sleep with her body molded to his.
He thinks of the past. Of ex lovers and unfinished sentences. Of things they did to get to where they are now. He also thinks of the future. Of redheaded babies and houses in the Hamptons. He thinks of the future and all he can see is her.
He knows.
He knows. And he can't wait any longer.
"Marry me," he whispers against her temple.
They break apart and he remembers them having this conversation at Louis's wedding.
"For real this time," he adds.
Donna tilts her head at him the way she's always done it. With grace and that beautiful smile of her that he loves. "Harvey?"
It hits him as he drops down on one knee that he's finally doing this. He's finally going to ask her to marry him.
He lets out a choked laugh because he hasn't even said anything yet and he can see her eyes starting to glass already.
"You've been the most important person in my life for as long as I can remember. I wouldn't be where I am right now without you. Both professionally and personally," he takes a deep breath before continuing, "Years ago you told me that if anybody was falling for anybody it would be me falling for you. You were right, you know? I think I fell for you the minute I met you in that bar. And I must have done something right because well, you're here, aren't you? It's always been you, Donna. From the beginning. You're the reason why it never worked out with anyone else. I think about the future and all I see is you. You're it for me. And God, I know I don't even have a ring with me right now but I can't help it. I love you. I don't wanna waste anymore time."
"So, marry me?"
She slowly lowers herself to the floor, takes his face in her hands and just nods. By this point, tears were already streaming down her face. She launches herself into his arms and holds him tight.
"Of course I will," she sobs.
A mere hour later, they're in bed, extremely sated and ridiculously happy. Lifting up her hand to inspect the ring, she feels an overwhelming love for the man next to her. The classic Harry Winston glimmers in the dark lighting of his bedroom, the diamond reflecting the city lights. Every time she looks at it, it takes her breath away and makes it seem like the first time.
That night, as she dreams of the future and forever, she sees him.
It's always him.