AN: This was written for a Tumblr prompt which can be found at the end of the story because... spoilers! Also, this hasn't been beta read. Apologies for the mistakes.
Enjoy!
Kurt strode into the drugstore with confidence, his shoulders back and his head high. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it with aplomb. Mercedes and Rachel were waiting in the car for him and he knew they were giggling and talking smack. They probably thought he'd chicken out. Well, if that's what they were thinking, then they'd seriously underestimated Kurt Elizabeth Hummel. He wasn't about to back down from a dare. In fact, he was so determined he didn't even hear the cheerful, "Good evening!" called to him from the front counter. Kurt was on a mission.
His eyes flitted over the signs hanging from the ceiling. "Hair Care", "Office Supplies", "Adult Health". Kurt nodded to himself, that was his target. Kurt hurried to the back corner of the store, past tampons and adult diapers until he found a whole row of what he was looking for. Condoms. Kurt gritted his teeth at the sheer amount of options available to him. All kinds and sizes, colorful, plain, with ribbings, and without. Kurt had no idea what he was doing here. Luckily, the point wasn't to find the perfect condom. It was just to buy a lot of them – twenty to be exact.
Rachel had dared him to walk into the corner drug store and buy twenty condoms and nothing else. Easy. As far as dares go it wasn't a bad one. Rachel had even fronted the cash.
Kurt just started grabbing blindly until he had an armload of condoms – not even caring what kind they were, just that he had enough. He hurried back to the counter ignoring the judgmental stare of a middle-aged woman nearby. It wasn't until he was almost to the front of the store that he realized the total catastrophe this mission had become.
There standing behind the only open register was The World's Cutest Cashier. That's actually what Kurt called him when talking about him, and yes, he talked about the cashier at his local drugstore. Mercedes and Rachel knew all about him. The World's Cutest Cashier had dark curly hair, ridiculously thick, but adorable eyebrows, hazel eyes that made Kurt feel like melting on the spot and a smile that sent shivers down his back.
This couldn't be happening. The World's Cutest Cashier usually worked weekend days; he was never here so late. Kurt wasn't a stalker, but yes, he'd paid attention to The World's Cutest Cashier's schedule. And if Kurt had come in a few times for milk, paper towels, or chips that he didn't really need just because The World's Cutest Cashier was working, could anyone blame him?
Now he wished The World's Cutest Cashier were anywhere but here. Kurt looked down at the pile of condoms in his arms and out the front doors where Rachel's VW Beetle was parked. He could either face the girls having failed his dare… or walk up and buy condoms from the boy he'd been crushing on for months.
"Come on, Kurt." He whispered to himself, "You are many things, but a quitter is not one of them." Kurt took a deep breath and walked the rest of the way to the front counter.
"Hi." The World's Cutest Cashier greeted with a dazzling smile as Kurt approached him. Kurt could already feel his cheeks start to heat up.
"Hi." Kurt managed to get out before dumping his armload on the counter. "I'd… like to butt these."
The cashier looked at him funny, a bewildered grin on his face. "You'd like to...?"
It took Kurt a moment to realize what he'd said. "Buy! Oh god. Not that..." Kurt felt his face flush and his throat go dry. "I'd like to buy these. Um... may I please buy these?"
Kurt groaned internally, why was he even asking? What else was he going to do? Throw them in the air like confetti?
"Oh, you want to buy these?" The man looked at the pile and then at Kurt, his lips twisting up in an unsuppressed smile.
"I…" Kurt cleared his throat, "Yes please." His voice came out far more high-pitched than he would have preferred. Kurt glanced at the cashier's nametag it read, "Kenneth." Not that his name was Kenneth – Kurt had already discovered that he had a different nametag nearly every time Kurt come in. That's why Kurt just referred to him as The World's Cutest Cashier in his head.
The cashier nodded his head, biting a lip as his eyes danced and he very clearly held back his laughter.
Oh god, if the floor opened up at that moment and swallowed Kurt whole he'd thank it for a merciful death.
"Um..." The World's Cutest Cashier held up a Trojan Fire & Ice condom and scanned it as Kurt's cheeks went from warm to burning. The next few were all the same and he was able to scan one and put in the quantity in the register – and Kurt was kicking himself for not getting all the same thing, at least it would have been faster.
The World's Cutest Cashier was barely containing himself now and the next condom in the pile was an XXX-Large. The cashier glanced up from the condom and looked Kurt dead in the eye – a smirk on his stupid, handsome face. Kurt felt like he was on fire. If it were possible for a human being to spontaneously combust, this would be how it happened.
"They aren't for me!" Kurt blurted out. "I mean… they… I'm buying them, but don't even know what I'm doing." Kurt hooked a finger under his collar and pulled at it, he was so hot all of a sudden. "I'm a baby penguin – that's what my friends call me because I don't… I've never… I don't use condoms. No! No. I don't mean I don't use them. I would, obviously. You need to be safe. That's what they're for… I..." Kurt felt like he was going to burst into flames. "What I mean is I've never even had sex!" Kurt's hand flew to his mouth clamping over it as his words rang out.
The World's Cutest Cashier's eyes widened and he was very clearly doing everything he could to not laugh.
Kurt lowered his hand slowly, forcing himself to be calm. "What I mean to say is, this is all for a dare."
That seemed to be the last straw, the cashier burst out laughing, a huge grin on his face as he leaned over the counter, his hands flat on the surface bracing himself.
"I… we are having a sleepover and I chose dare," Kurt said his voice hushed and embarrassed. "I should have chosen truth."
The man was still laughing and Kurt's face was still aflame. That was it. He'd never be able to use this drugstore again. In fact, he was going to have to move. Out of the country. He'd live in a yurt somewhere in the wilderness and never show his face again.
The cashier finally seemed to get ahold of himself, his laughter dying down. He ran a hand across his face and then glanced up at Kurt through his dark eyelashes, his beautiful eyes sparkling and Kurt's stomach swooped. He was just so gorgeous. Kurt was in love.
"I'm sorry. I am really sorry." The cashier said, his voice still trembling slightly with laughter. "I didn't mean to make you blush." He motioned to Kurt's face and Kurt had to look away for a moment. "Did you know when you blush even your ears turn red?"
"Oh god." Kurt groaned starting at the floor.
"No no! Please don't be embarrassed! It's adorable."
Kurt looked up at that and found that the cashier was sending him what almost seemed like a flirty smile.
"Adorable?"
"Yes."
"Oh." Kurt was blushing again for a completely new reason. "Well, thank you, Kenneth."
The cashier scrunched his forehead in confusion for a moment before looking down at his nametag. "Oh! No… there is a whole box in the back of name tags left after people quit. I change it out, but um…" He held out a hand. "My name is Blaine."
Kurt reached out for his hand, "Blaine." It was a beautiful name. "I'm Kurt."
"It a pleasure to meet you… Kurt." Blaine smiled and the way he said his name made Kurt's toes curl. "Again, I'm sorry to embarrass you. I wasn't trying to be mean but uh…" He held up a condom that read, "Pleasure Shaped". Kurt couldn't even imagine what that meant. "It's really funny."
Kurt smiled and chuckled. It was pretty funny. "Yeah. It is."
"You sure you want to buy all these?"
"My friends are waiting in the car and there is no way I'm backing out now."
"Well then," Blaine said as he continued ringing him up, "I'll give you the employee discount. It is the least I can do."
Kurt beamed at him. Rachel was paying, but still, it was a kind offer. "Thank you!"
Blaine rang up the last condom looking at it at the same time Kurt did. This one was, "ribbed for her pleasure".
"So there's no special 'her'?" Blaine asked as he swept the condoms into a bag.
"What?" Kurt's eyebrows lifted, "Oh. No. No no. There's no one special, and if there were it would, um… be him. Not her."
Blaine smiled broadly. "Oh."
"Yeah."
"Listen, Kurt, I hope this isn't out of line, but I've noticed you in here before so I'm thinking maybe you live close by?"
"You've noticed me?"
"Uh... yeah." Blaine chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck and it was his turn to blush now. "Maybe… maybe we could get coffee sometime? I'd love to buy you coffee. Or um… tea…"
Kurt couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was Blaine asking him out? "Are you asking me out?" Kurt blurted before he had a chance to stop himself.
"Yes. Not very well apparently." Blaine winked." But that is what I'm trying to do."
Kurt laughed, feeling so happy he couldn't help it. "Then yes. Yes, I would love to go out with you."
Blaine smiled back and they both stood there a moment looking at each other with ridiculous grins on their faces.
"Oh." Blaine reached into the front pocket of his apron to bring out his phone. "Can I get your number?"
"Yes! Of course." They exchanged numbers and Kurt paid for his… purchases.
"I'll text you when I get off work. We could go out tomorrow?"
"Perfect. That's perfect."
"I honestly can't wait."
Kurt practically skipped to the exit. He turned around at the door to see Blaine watching him, his eyes bright and a sweet smile on his lips. Kurt waved and then ducked out the door laughing and feeling giddy.
He got back into Rachel's car and the girls looked at him expectantly.
"Well, what happened?"
"That took forever."
Kurt bit his lip, "I have a date."
"What?"
"No way." Mercedes gasped, grabbing his hand. "How? With who?"
"The World's Cutest Cashier. His name is Blaine."
"No!" Both girls shouted in delight.
"Go. Drive. He might be able to see us sitting in the car." Kurt laughed. "I'll tell you everything back at the house."
Rachel pulled out of the parking lot talking a mile a minute, but Kurt wasn't paying attention. All he could think about was the fact that he had a date. A date with Blaine – and enough condoms to fill his nightstand drawer. Oh god, he wasn't going to put those two thoughts together. No, he had a date for coffee and maybe he was still a baby penguin, but that was fine. He had everything he wanted right now, - a chance to finally get to know The World's Cutest Cashier.
Tumblr prompt:
"My friends dared me to buy 20 condoms but I didn't realize that the cute cashier would be working tonight so I avoided eye contact as I piled them onto the counter and please stop laughing so hard, oh my god it's for a dare okay I've never had sex in my life and once you stopped laughing, I swear I fell in love with that sparkle in your eye as you grinned wildly at me and asked me out for a drink" AU
