Ok here it is people my 2nd Watershed story. I think I am doing well. Last year I wrote 5 Always fics so I am retraining myself this time haa ha.

So I want to point out a few things.

Do I think these events will happen in the show. NO. So call this story AU if you like.

Are the characters in characters. Mmmm no probably not.

Do I want reviews pointing this out. NO.

Yes there are some aspects of this story that are believable and there are some that are not. Like my previous watershed story I just felt like I had to get this out. I needed to bring these issues forward and I wanted others to hear my thoughts/ theories. Which is why I love writing fan fic! I can express my ideas no matter how farfetched they seem. At times I hated going to English class because my ideas were laughed at by my fellow classmates. I don't get it here. Well at least I can't see your eye rolls or hear the laughter.

Enjoy a peak into my mind.

Read on!

Love, Honor and Protect

By

Natalie Elizabeth

Kate Beckett stared at the building before her. She was nervous about entering, but knew there was nowhere else she wanted to be. Yet, she stood on the sidewalk, staring at the building, stalling. As a cab honked its horn at a pedestrian, Beckett smiled. The sounds of New York were one of the many things she missed about the city.

It had been three months since she had left New York and had gone to DC. Three months of missing the sights and sounds of New York. A unique city that was unlike any other she visited. It was unique for a very important reason. The city contained Richard Castle.

Beckett closed her eyes as the pain swept over her. Pain she had caused. She had turned down his offer of marriage. She had doubts about his motivation. If the job offer hadn't come up, he probably wouldn't have gone down on one knee. The job offer was legitimate, so she had chosen that option. The safer option.

The option that now had her standing in front of this building. Taking a deep breath, she pulled open the door and walked in. The room was dimly lit, so Beckett cautiously moved around. Suddenly, the room was filled with light and Beckett saw a young man standing on a stage. He immediately started belting out an over-acted monologue. Beckett looked around at the seats in front of her and started making her way towards them. Although she couldn't identify anyone sitting in the seats, surely one of them would be able to help her.

"Robert, Robert, stop. I know I said be flamboyant but..."

The man on stage shook his head but smiled.

"Considering my last performance was so subdued, I thought I'd try going over the top. I figured then maybe we can find a middle ground."

The red-headed woman walked out onto the stage and Beckett held her breath.

"I like your thinking, young man. Bring it down just a touch and lose the exaggerated hand gestures, and I think we will have it,"

"Ok Martha. Thanks."

Martha turned towards the small audience, pointed her finger upwards and opened her mouth but no words came out. Beckett managed a brief smile as she felt Martha's eyes land on her.

"Katherine, is that you?"

"Yes. Sorry to interrupt."

"Don't be silly," Martha replied as she walked off the stage and made her way over to her.

Beckett was surprised when the woman threw her arms around her. Considering the circumstances surrounding her leaving, Beckett was surprised Martha wasn't throwing her out of the building. Seeing the woman had no aversion to hugging her, Beckett quickly wrapped her arms around her. Resting her head on Martha's shoulder, Beckett squeezed her tight.

"Katherine, are you okay?"

"No," Beckett practically sobbed as she pulled away.

Martha gave her a sympathetic look. "Come on dear."

Martha wrapped an arm around her shoulders and guided Beckett away from the stage. The performance Martha had been directing was abandoned as she took Beckett into her office.

"Take a seat dear."

Beckett sat down as Martha leaned against her desk.

"Is everything ok? I spoke to your father a few days ago, and he seemed fine."

Beckett frowned. "You spoke to my father?"

Martha nodded. "Yes, we keep in touch."

Beckett was surprised, as her father hadn't mentioned it.

"My father is okay; I spoke to him a few days ago."

"So, what brings you to New York?"

Beckett bit her lip and looked away from Martha. "I quit my job."

"You quit?"

Beckett nodded. "It just wasn't what I thought it would be," she stated, then shook her head. "No, it's exactly what I thought it would be, and I hated it. Long hours. So strict about the way I could wear my hair and my heels were a big no no. Then there was the stupidity; they couldn't think outside the box."

"Outside the box," Martha implored.

Beckett nodded. "Yeah. I mean, I am used to playing by the rules and sticking to the facts, but they were just so single-minded about everything. I was trying to help by coming up with theories, and they thought I was crazy."

"Crazy?" Martha asked, confused.

"Crazy Kate. That was my nickname. Crazy Kate with her crazy theories. That isn't how it is. I could put up with people at the precinct calling me Bad Ass Beckett. Even Castle calling me By the Book Beckett when I wouldn't listen to one of his theories. Crazy Kate. No! That's not how it was supposed to be. It's meant to be Crazy Castle with his theories."

Martha smiled. "I guess my son rubbed off on you?"

Beckett scoffed as she shook her head. "I didn't even realise until..."

"Until you left."

Beckett nodded. "I realised I backed Castle up a lot of the time with his theories. I just didn't realise how much I had started to think like him though."

"So you quit because you hated your job."

Beckett shook her head. "I could have put up with the job. I quit because I miss my old life. No, that's not right. I missed the life that I had created with Rick. With you and Alexis too." Beckett looked up at Martha and her bottom lip started to quiver. "Oh Martha, what am I going to do? I have messed everything up."

Martha walked over to her and sat down. When Martha's arm came up to surround her shoulders, Beckett turned into the embrace. She could no longer hold in the tears.

"I screwed it up, Martha."

Martha reassuringly rubbed Kate's shoulder.

"Shhhs dear, it's going to be okay."

Beckett shook her head. "No, it isn't," she replied as she pulled out of Martha's embrace and slightly swiped at the wet spot she had left on Martha's shoulder.

"I'm sorry about this. I shouldn't have come here. I shouldn't be dumping this on you."

Beckett stood up to leave, but Martha pulled her back down.

"Then why did you come here dear? Surely you could have gone to speak to your father or Lanie. Or have you already?"

Beckett shook her head. "I got off the plane and went straight to my storage locker. I put my luggage there before coming here."

Martha frowned. "Does anyone know you're in New York City?"

Beckett swiped her hand across her nose to clear the moisture that was there.

"No. I wanted to talk to Lanie, but I can't deal with her slap in the face approach right now. My father? Well. Martha, I just really needed to talk to my mother and.."

"And you can't, so you came here?"

Tears rolled down Beckett's cheeks as she nodded.

"Oh Katherine, come here," Martha said as she pulled her into the third hug for the day. "I am so glad you came to me."

Beckett tried to sniff back her tears. "You are? Even though Rick and I broke up?"

"You broke up with Richard. You didn't break up with me,"

A smile twitched to Beckett's lips. "No, I didn't. I've missed you, Martha."

"But not as much as you have missed my son right,"

This time Beckett laughed. "Well, pretty close."

"Have you talked to Richard?"

Beckett pulled out of Martha's embrace, but kept a light grip on her arms.

"And say what?"

Martha shrugged. "Hello would be a good start."

"Then what?" Beckett implored. "I'm an idiot,"

"You're not the only one to feel that way."

Beckett frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Talk to Richard," Martha insisted. "He still loves you very much."

Beckett shook her head. "How could he? I left him for a job,"

"You left for an opportunity. It was a mistake, one you obviously realise. We all make mistakes dear, now it's up to you to fix it."

"What if he doesn't want it fixed?"

Martha laughed. "Then he wouldn't be carrying your ring around in his pocket."

Beckett froze. "The engagement ring."

Martha nodded. "Richard nearly fired the maid because she took his clothes that he left on the floor. He was sleeping when she came, so she took them along with the other clothes. What he didn't realise was that she had put the ring box on his bedside table for safe keeping."

Beckett gulped. "Why is he carrying it around with him?"

Martha patted Beckett's leg. "Maybe you should ask him that dear?"

"I can't."

Martha shook her head. "No. What you can't do is sit here, wallowing in self-pity. You made a decision, and it was the wrong one. Are you supposed to spend the rest of your life drowning in misery? No. You pick up the phone!"

"He won't pick it up."

"Have you tried?" Martha questioned.

Beckett shook her head.

"Do you want to spend the rest of your life wondering 'if only I had called him, things might be different'? There is no point in rehashing over if only I stayed. You didn't, its done. You made the decision to leave, and you can also make the decision to call Richard."

Beckett gulped as Martha's words sunk in. If Only! She didn't want a life full of if onlys, but she did want a full life. It was the reason she had left DC.

Beckett bit her lip and nodded slightly. "Ok. I'll call him tomorrow."

"Today," Martha insisted.

Beckett stood up. "Ok, but after I get a coffee."

"Now," Martha said, raising her voice.

Taking a deep breath, Beckett removed her phone from her pocket.

"I'll be waiting outside," Martha told her as she gracefully exited the room and shut the door.

Beckett looked around the room, trying to assess where she should take the call. Sitting behind Martha's desk, or on the desk? She eventually chose the couch she had been sitting on. Beckett unzipped her jacket and then fixed her hair. She was procrastinating, she knew she was. Unlocking her phone she brought up Castle's number and hesitated for a few seconds before she hit the call button.

Wrapping an arm around herself, Beckett gripped tightly as the phone rang. And rang. And rang.

"Hey this is Rick Castle. I am busy doing way cooler stuff so I can't answer my phone. Leave a message and I might get back to you."

Beckett gulped. Voicemail. Was that better or worse.

"Hi. Umm. Rick it's Kate. Kate Beckett," She rolled her eyes at her own stupidity. Even if he did know another Kate, he would certainly know her voice. "I Umm. I'm in New York. And I was wondering if you were free to get together. To chat," she added, wanting there to be no mistake about the reason for seeing him. "If you want that is. It's okay if you don't. I mean don't feel like you have to. Give me a call or not."

Beckett quickly disconnected and dropped the phone on the couch next to her. She had made an idiot of herself on the phone. Since when did she act so nervous on the phone? This was Castle. This was Rick. The man who had been not only her lover but her friend. It shouldn't have been difficult, but it was.

Hearing the door open, Beckett looked up as Martha entered.

"So?"

"He didn't pick up."

"Oh."

Beckett stood up and picked up her phone. "Listen Martha, thanks for being a shoulder to cry on. I appreciate it but I really should go."

Martha stepped forward and gave her a hug. "If you're leaving, don't lose hope, dear. Maybe he was asleep."

Beckett nodded even though she didn't believe her. It was 2PM in the afternoon, so he should be up. His latest book was due to be out soon, so he wouldn't be staying up writing. With her absence from the precinct, she doubted Gates would have let Castle stay on. He had no reason to be asleep. It wouldn't be the first time Castle had ignored her call. She was sure that's what he was doing. It's what she would have done in the same situation

"I should go," Beckett told Martha. "Might be an idea to let my dad know I am back."

"Ok dear. Please come and see me again soon,"

Beckett gave her a brief smile before exiting the office. Making her way through the darkened halls, Beckett could hear the performance still going on, on stage. Just as she was about to exit the building, her phone started ringing. Beckett quickly ran from Martha's school while trying to grab her phone. She had already disturbed the performance once, and she didn't want to do it again. Beckett almost dropped the phone when she saw Castle's smiling face staring back. Tapping her phone to answer it, she practically knocked herself out with the phone in her haste.

"Rick. Hi." She said nervously.

"Hey. Sorry I didn't answer your call. I was in the shower. I thought it was Gina nagging me about public appearances so I ignored it. You know me though, my curiosity got the better of me. I was worried it was my mother or Alexis calling so I stepped out to check it."

He was in the shower? You only showered in the middle of the day for one reason. You had gotten all hot and sweaty and Castle wasn't the type to go for a run.

"I'm sorry. You were in the middle of something," or someone. "It wasn't important, you could have called me back later."

"No, it's fine. I just got up and thought a shower was way overdue."

Beckett frowned. "You just got up. It's 2. Have a late night?"

Was he out partying until 5 am?

"Yes and no. I can't sleep for more than a few hours."

Beckett frowned. His sleep pattern had always been erratic. Either because of a case, or writing when inspiration struck. He never had trouble sleeping before.

"Are you okay?" she wondered, concerned.

"Yeah. I've been to the doc for my annual checkup. Thank God there is a blood test to check for prostate now."

Beckett bit her lip and smiled. Typical Castle to throw in a joke.

"So, you're in New York."

"Yes. I was wondering if you were free to catch up. If you want to."

"Yes. Sure. Of course," he quickly said.

Beckett bit her lip. She hadn't been expecting that.

"Umm ok. Whenever you're free works for me,"

Castle chuckled. "Well, I am literally standing here butt naked. It's going to take me a little while to get ready. We can meet in an hour or so. It depends where you want to meet, and how long it will take me to get ready."

Beckett laughed. He took longer to get ready than she did, and he didn't even need to apply make up. Although, she had seen him with her eyebrow comb more than once, though he had tried to hide it.

"Well, you don't need to dress up for me Rick."

"Yeah, that time frame was me going casual."

Beckett laughed again. Something she had only been doing for the past few minutes. It had been too long for her to remember when it had occurred before today.

"Well, I could come to you. That way you could save time travelling, and there would be no need to style your hair."

"There is always a need to style my hair," he mocked.

"Or we could meet somewhere else if you prefer."

"No, here is fine. I'll see you soon then."

"Okay. See you soon."

Beckett took a deep breath as she hung up the phone. The easy part was over. Now she had to face the man she loved yet had rejected.

A huge thank you to all of you out there who read, reviewed, favourited or alerted me and my stories. I recently found my inbox flooded and was like WOW what's going on? Whatever spurred it on keep it up people please. I really need to pick me up at the moment.

Oh and if you haven't already checked it please read my story You &Coffee. My inspiration for this story was a random card sent to me by fellow author LittleLizzieZentara. We met because Liz reviewed my first Castle fanfic, Strange, weird and Wonderful. We struck up a friendship over 2 years ago now. See what a review can do : )